How to change your life for the better. How to think to change life for the better. Important Questions You Can Ask Yourself Right Now

Remember: life is a journey, not a destination

A hackneyed but relevant phrase. Live full life- feel every day, learn new things, and not sacrifice everything for one goal. Don't be discouraged if it doesn't work at first. This is fine.

Be honest with yourself and others

Lies suck energy and make a person unhappy. Just imagine how much you need to remember when lying so as not to accidentally spill the beans. What happiness is here. In addition, if you are not honest with yourself, you cannot grow and develop. And if you lie to others, then trust and intimacy disappear in a relationship.

People tell lies for various reasons. Out of envy, out of unwillingness to offend, fear of opening up or entering into. Being honest is hard, but that's the only way to live life to the fullest.

Learn to accept yourself

We often reminisce about past failures and spend too much time thinking about our own. weaknesses. We think about what we don’t like about ourselves, how to change it, and we believe that we should become different. Wasting life on such reflections and events from the past means not noticing the present and being closed to the new in the future. Accept conscious decision love yourself the way you are. Get rid of the burden of memories and negative thoughts.

Define your values

Having formulated values, it will be easier for you to put life goals that will not contradict them. Stick to your beliefs and don't let others confuse you. After all, living in accordance with your principles is much more pleasant than constantly following the advice of others.

Stop putting yourself down

It is believed that self-criticism helps to develop, but research How to Stop the Self-Criticism and Feel Better About You proved the negative impact of this approach both on the person himself and on his attitude towards others. The stricter you are with yourself, the higher the chances of treating others in the same way. Downgrading will not help you become better and achieve your goals. Be kind to yourself.

Replace negative thoughts with attitudes. For example, instead of "I'm a failure," say to yourself, "Things didn't go according to plan. But I will figure out why this happened, and in the future I will not make such mistakes. I will find a way to achieve what I want in another way.”

Analyze self-criticism logically. Instead of “I’m stupid, everyone in the group is smarter than me,” think about whether there are objective reasons to think so. Maybe you're just not preparing well enough for class. Maybe laziness is to blame, but not intelligence. Having analyzed the thought in this way, you will understand what steps you need to take without belittling yourself.

Be flexible

Life is full of change. Be open to new things and learn to adapt to the changes that are happening, even if you don’t like them at first. Take them as an opportunity to get new experience. This kind of positive thinking will help develop flexibility.

Getting fired from Apple is the best thing that ever happened to me. The heavy burden of success has been replaced by the carelessness of a novice, less confident entrepreneur. I have freed myself to enter one of the most fruitful periods of my life.

Steve Jobs, American entrepreneur, CEO of Apple

Keep fit

Taking care of the body is another step on the way to a full life. You have one, and it's important to make sure it's healthy. It's hard to live rich life when it hurts here and it hurts there.

Eat right. Eat as many fruits, vegetables, complex carbohydrates. Products with great content try to avoid sugar, but still indulge yourself with a piece of cake or a glass of wine from time to time.

Go in for sports. Regular exercise will help you feel healthier and happier.

Stop forcing yourself

People often force themselves to do things that are at odds with their values ​​and desires. Coercion causes irritation, frustration and sadness. If you get rid of this, then living a full life will become easier.

As soon as "I should" enters your mind, think about why you feel that way. For example, "I need to lose weight." This may be the advice of a doctor or the desire of a person with a different perception of beauty. In the first case, changes are really needed; in the second, they can even be dangerous. Do only what is important to you, not what others demand.

Method 2. Go your own way

Leave your comfort zone

The more often you perform unusual actions for yourself, the higher Anxiety Can Bring Out the Best your performance. How harder task put in front of you, the faster you get used to the new and calmer perceive life's difficulties. Getting out of your comfort zone helps you become more flexible, and we've already found out how important this is.

Start small. Go to a place you don't know anything about. Go on a spontaneous journey or do something at work that you haven't done before.

Be Realistic

Set goals according to your abilities, taking into account your skills and. Strive for what is important to you, and do not compete with others. Achieving what you want should depend only on your needs, but not on the desire to show off or prove something to someone.

Be prepared for things to go wrong

When a person lives a full life, he takes risks. He makes decisions that have consequences. And sometimes they may not turn out as planned. It is important to understand that life is unpredictable, and to treat surprises calmly. The ability to be ready for anything makes it possible to be one step ahead and calculate the options for the development of events.

Look for opportunities to learn

Don't sit still and let life just take its course. Be active, learn new things, make your brain work. Analyze your experience and the experience of others. This will help you be calmer difficult situations and allow you to move forward with confidence.

Know how to thank

Gratitude is not just a feeling - it's a lifestyle. It will help you survive the traumas of the past, if you consider them not as pain, but as a valuable experience, and be grateful to life for it. It will strengthen relationships with loved ones, and without them it is extremely difficult to live a full life.

Tell relatives, friends and others important people how glad you are that you have them. Share gratitude, do not be afraid to express it, and life will be filled with pleasure and harmony.

Appreciate every moment and don't focus on the bad. Appreciate the beauty of everyday life, be grateful to life even for the little things: beautiful sunset, good weather and delicious coffee.

The more pleasant little things you notice, the better life will become.

Keep a diary

Try not just to record the events that have occurred, but to analyze them. How did you react, why did it happen, how did you feel then and now, and what would you do if this situation happened again. All this will show what is going well in life, and what needs to be worked on more.

laugh

Laugh - the best medicine. It lowers stress hormone levels and improves mood. Plus, it's contagious. If you laugh, others will, and this is the easiest way to create emotional and social connections.

Don't chase material things

From a large number things you will not become happier. Do not buy impulsively, do not try to get rid of stress through shopping. Buy only what you really need.

If you already have a lot of useless things, donate them to charity. Get rid of everything you don't like and start living free from material assets life.

A person picks up the emotions of others as easily as a cold. If you spend a day with happy people, you will start to feel better. If you communicate with gloomy and dissatisfied with life, then this will also affect your mood. Only negative. Therefore, it is important not to waste time on toxic people.

Surround yourself with those who care about you, who respect you and others.

But this does not mean that friends and loved ones cannot constructively criticize you. Sometimes you still need someone to point out mistakes. But it is important to feel that people do it with kindness, respect and care. That they really help you get better.

Discuss your needs

Confidently express your thoughts and needs, but remember that others have desires that need to be heard. Be open and honest, but don't blame or judge people.

It's good to be honest with the person that they hurt you. Explain what exactly bothered you. It is bad to accuse him of inhumanity without a specific explanation of the reason.

To prevent people from taking your words as accusations, always say "I". For example, "I felt like my needs weren't important when you didn't pick me up from work" instead of "You didn't even pick me up from work, you don't care about me."

Instead of judging the actions of others, try to understand why they did it. Ask to tell more about the reasons, find out someone else's point of view. If you still disagree with the opinion, tell us why and offer an alternative.

Be selfless

Often the thought that we deserve more is what keeps us from moving forward. Giving, but not receiving in return, we are in people, life, justice. It's hard to live a full life when there is such darkness in your head. Therefore, it is important to share love, kindness, warmth and care disinterestedly.

But this does not mean that you can allow yourself to wipe your feet. Stop any attempts to take advantage of your good attitude.

Forgive yourself and those around you

Hard, but good for the soul. By forgiving, you will be freed from stress, let go of the accumulated negativity and feel light. Learn to forgive people, despite their behavior, and this will help heal spiritual wounds.

It is important to forgive not only others, but also yourself. Stop thinking about mistakes and blaming yourself for what you did. The past cannot be changed. Use this experience as an opportunity to improve. Show yourself the same empathy that you show others.

Accept people for who they are

It can be difficult to communicate with a person who is so different from us. But do not try to change it and adjust it for yourself. Remember that each person is a unique individual who can teach you something new. Be kind and polite in any company. Enjoy the company of other people. Treat everyone the way you would like to be treated.

228 713 6 Life is amazing and beautiful in all its manifestations, with ups and downs, sorrows and joys, pluses and minuses ... Simply because it exists. But if there are more and more descents and falls on the way, depression and apathy prevent you from being happy and does not let go of the feeling that everything has reached a dead end, then it means that it is time to change your life for the better. And you need to do this, even when you don’t want change at all.

We approached the preparation of this article very responsibly. It contains materials from various published publications, conferences, trainings and of course personal experience. The article is filled practical advice, awareness and application of which will certainly lead to changes in your life. We'll tell you where to start. Further actions each person must determine for himself individually, in accordance with what he wants to receive. Well, let's go! How to change your life for the better.

How to change your life for the better

Where do thoughts of life change come from?

Everyone wants to be happy, but in order to make a dream come true, sitting and waiting in one place is not enough. Therefore, we have to act.

First, thoughts come that say that everything is enough, it’s no longer possible! And they, in turn, materialize in actions. This, of course, with a responsible approach to one's own life. After all, you can do nothing to change the situation, bring yourself to a moral void (which is very undesirable, since it is difficult to get out of there). In this regard, with any prompting of the mind and soul to action, it should immediately begin to make the first attempts to change its life.

First steps - how to start change ?

Everyone intuitively knows and feels that start better with yourself. But it is very difficult to do this, and, in general, the first steps are always the most difficult. But the essence of the problem also lies in the fact that it is necessary to choose the only correct path along which it will be necessary to go, without turning, for some time. And also decide what exactly you would like to come to. For this you need:

  1. Do a little research on your life and your own "I". Think about what points you would like to correct, do better, what you don’t like at all, and which aspects it is desirable to eliminate by and large. It is easier to carry out such work not in the mind, but on a sheet of paper, writing down all the exciting points, separating, of course, the positive from the negative.
  2. Then you need to paint each position, that is, write opposite the desired one - why would you like to achieve this? and how to reach the goal. Those items on the list that carry a negative connotation must also be painted, and then crossed out and forgotten about.

It is precisely this action - writing down your desires, aspirations, needs on a piece of paper - that is the first step towards changing your life, becoming better! It's time for a change! The checklist helps to determine the goal most accurately and understand what needs to be removed from life and what to add in order to make it satisfy you.

A start! But one cannot expect instant improvements, transformations and metamorphoses. This process is quite lengthy and difficult. You need to have a lot of patience. Expecting quick changes can only spoil the whole mood, which will lead to an inevitable breakdown and return to your “trough”.

To change your life, you need to tirelessly, constantly work on yourself. It is possible that at first bad thoughts will swarm in the head, the mind will seek all sorts of evidence that happiness is the lot of other people, etc. Almost everyone who has embarked on the path of positive changes sins with this. The main thing is not to stop, pull yourself together and continue! And in order not to slip back into your previous settings, you need to use the following recommendations and ways to change your life in a positive way.

In order to succeed in any business, you need to draw up before starting it. detailed plan actions. So the first recommendation is:

#1 Writing instructions

It is desirable that each maneuver on the way to the goal be considered in detail. This is important, because you can’t forget anything, you need to do everything right. And then you can expect the desired effect.

Remember order in your head and thoughts = order in life! This should become an axiom on the way to change.

How to make a good plan? To do this, you should return to the very first step - your wish list. It already outlines how to achieve each goal. And now this list is very useful. Just so as not to miss a single detail and make detailed instructions from the notes.

Each list item can be represented as a table. For example, there is a target: lose weight .

Obstacles What can help? Actions What will give you what you want?
1. Lack of willpower needed to endure a diet.

2. Addiction to food.

3. Unhealthy snacks.

4. Jamming problems.

1. Literature.

2. Internet.

3. Nutritionist, gastroenterologist and endocrinologist.

4. Marathon with a friend.

5. Motivating pictures.

1. Develop a menu for proper nutrition.

2. Gradually connect the sport (when?).

3. Weigh yourself once a week.

4. Come up with a reward system.

1. Health.

2. Beauty: clean skin, healthy complexion.

Of course, each column of the table can contain many more items. Everything is individual. It will also be useful to start a diary or blog, where, in addition to the goals themselves, you can write down your slightest achievements, describe mistakes, etc.

#2 Set up for the best result

Always, as soon as despondency and bad mood begin to win back positions, you need to to force oneself get back on the positive wave. In any way: read affirmations, do something calming, listen to music, etc. It’s good to always have some motivators on hand for such cases. At least just your list, which lists all the good points that change will give.

You always need to remember for what purpose everything was started. Do not be shy to say out loud to yourself that everything will definitely turn out, write down achievements. After all, they are quickly erased from memory in the face of even the smallest setbacks. Seeing the dynamics of positive changes in front of you, it will be much easier to survive a period of decline.

How to act correctly at this stage? You need to eliminate negativity from your life.

  1. Avoid quarrels and disputes. And, in general, from all sorts of clashes with people.
  2. Always find a compromise. Or you can simply ignore the conflict situation.
  3. Learn to enjoy the little things, pay attention only to the bright, good, positive around you. This leads to good changes and facilitates the transition to a new stage of one's being.
  4. You need to let go of your past.. Forgive yourself all the negative, sad moments, imperfect actions, etc. Now you should think about a new life, but you need to be "here and now."

Of course, on the way to happiness, there will be breakdowns and explosions. But we must not allow them to cross out the entire path and return to the level from which it was started, if not lower. Constant work on yourself will not allow this to happen.

#3 Unnecessary and bad habits are a force that pulls back

This refers not only to alcohol, smoking, etc. But, in general, all the habits that do not let go in a new happy life. What could it be? It's simple:

  • talk to the mother;
  • go to bed late, constantly be in a state of extreme lack of sleep;
  • forget promises;
  • be lazy;
  • put off everything for tomorrow;
  • eat or pass a lot;
  • watch TV often
  • play toys on the phone;
  • forget to wash your hair :)
  • bite your nails, etc.

Everyone will continue the list for himself. Ideal people no, but no one interferes with striving for perfection. Getting rid of the harmful, and acquiring the useful, you yourself will feel better, more confident in yourself.. Getting rid of addictions is difficult, but entertaining and important process on the way to change your life for the better. This item must be included in the plan for joyful change. And today, start replacing the bad with the good. For example, normalize sleep, exclude watching television from the daily routine, review nutrition, etc. Over time (perhaps not immediately), the new habit will take root and take one step closer to a wonderful positive future. If you know this feeling, then remember it more often: the feeling when you realize that you have done tremendous work on yourself and achieved a certain breakthrough! This will give you self-confidence, strength to move on, set new goals.

#4 Being open to people is moving forward

  • You can not hide from people, your relatives, relatives, friends, colleagues. It means those who can cheer up, support, simply lift the spirit with their presence. If someone you know has something that is on your wish list, then you need to impartially consider the situation and think about what action allowed this person to have your dream. And it is better to ask how he went to this goal and achieved it. Perhaps the advice will be useful, and today it will be possible to fit them into your own plan.
  • Should communicate more with friends. It is not necessary to share your experiences and problems, especially if you do not want to do this. You can simply charge yourself with positive energy from a pleasant pastime, conversations dear to your heart. The world seems much more beautiful when there is a person in the world on whom it is possible to rely.
  • But contacts with evil, pessimistic, dull people should be significantly limited. And if possible, avoid them altogether.

A good stimulus for personal growth is the person next to whom you need to grow, not fall!

By the way, new acquaintances also allow you to move forward, changing your old ideas and attitudes to new life directions. After all, they teach to open up to the world.

#5 Interests and hobbies are the way to go!

We need to remember what we were fond of in childhood. This is often the calling. For example, you really liked to collect autumn foliage or clumsy sticks that look like animals, sew or knit, decorate old furniture, cook or bake, paint something on paper, teach other children new foreign words, etc. Or maybe not in childhood, but in adult and fully conscious life, I wanted to do something, but somehow hands did not reach or doubts prevailed. But any person who finds himself in his favorite business is happy. So why don't you be happy too!?

In addition, interests can be quite mundane. If it is a pleasure to read, needlework, play sports, then it is worth allocating time for this. And when it seems that nothing is of interest, it only seems to be. A huge number of things exist in this world in order to distract from sad thoughts and not allow despondency to win and push back to the beginning of the path. There are many interesting courses and classes that can inspire. And inspiration brings joy!

Step by step comes the realization that there is no way back, that the heart is completely open to change, the best and most beautiful changes in life. But these recommendations are not quite enough to turn the world upside down in a good way. Therefore, more tips are vital that will change your life.

How to start new life and change yourself? You don't have to be superhuman to do this. All methods are incredibly simple. The main thing is to start and over time there will be no trace of pessimism, suffering and complaints.

  1. No best life-changing methods will help if you constantly clog your body. It is necessary to pay attention to quality and. We are what we eat! It is not necessary to eat only vegetables and fruits from your own garden and not drink alcohol at all. You just need to limit the flow of garbage inside as much as possible.
  2. Start learning another language. Not only will this be an amazing mindset, but it will also be a great opportunity for professional change. Sometimes, in an attempt to remember a new word, you begin to think about its meaning, look for synonyms. All this leads to the development of thinking, makes you go beyond the ordinary, thus leading to change. And besides, now the knowledge of the same English is more a necessity than a whim.
  3. Need to read more. Not magazines and other light reading, but something for development in one's specialty. Or classics, sociology, psychology, history, etc. You can not read, but listen. The main thing is that at least one book in 7 days. It turns out about 52 per year. Fifty-two works that are sure to change lives.
  4. Weekends should not be spent on the couch. Anywhere - in the gym, outdoors, museum, cinema, exhibition, in another city or visiting relatives. You can even jump with a parachute, learn to ride a horse, type blindly, etc. The main thing is to accumulate more impressions, they fill life, it becomes much more interesting with them. You don't have to sit still. It is necessary to expand the horizons and the area of ​​contact with the world. Change starts with movement.
  5. A personal blog or diary will help you deal with problems faster than they become unbearable.. Their usefulness lies in the ability to reason, think and analyze. And it is better to write in them about what you love most. And if no one can read a personal diary, then the blog will certainly find its admirers, and also help to earn extra money. And doing what you like and getting paid for it is the dream of many. Indeed, very often the opposite is true.
  6. If you learn to manage your time, it will become much easier to live. It is necessary to develop the habit of making decisions right away, acting today, and not tomorrow or “later”. Everything that is planned must be done or shifted onto the shoulders of another. But, the main thing is that the planned cases are completed, and not postponed indefinitely. Otherwise, they will become dead weight, pulling down. And we need to fly up! And it would be nice to remember everything that was not done and write it down. Find out whether there is a need under the circumstances to complete these cases. If not, then with peace of mind they can be crossed out. If yes, then make them soon. This will bring incredible relief and release many new and much needed forces.
  7. You should abandon the stupid pastime on the Internet, especially from games that steal not only time, but also life. If you use the unlimited possibilities of the network, then only with benefit - for development, training, work, etc. And it is better to communicate with friends live. What could be more beautiful than personal meetings, conversations, tactile sensations, laughter, smiles? Shared pleasant memories are created in this way, and not by emoticons on the World Wide Web.
  8. To stop being interested in the news does not mean to lag behind the world. Everyone will talk about the main thing. And everything secondary and superficial only interferes with life, causing unnecessary unrest, feelings and obscuring something really important. It's all confusing.
  9. No wonder there is such a proverb - who gets up early, God gives him. Having learned to spend the morning hours with benefit, you will soon notice how much more things you can do in a day. Much more than when you go to bed late. To sleep a person needs 7 hours, provided that he leads a healthy lifestyle. If you go to bed at 23.00 and wake up at 06.00, then during your wakefulness you can turn the whole world upside down. Today, more and more authors and personal growth coaches are advised to start their day as early as possible. Amazing Results show people! There is no limit to admiration when everything is done before lunch and there is time to do something else or do something for your own pleasure.
  10. Travel is one of the ways to change yourself and your life.. It is not necessary to fly to distant Australia to understand how diverse the world is. You don't need expensive tours to realize that it makes no sense to consider your small space as the whole Universe - it is much wider and goes beyond the limits of consciousness. Traveling makes a person more tolerant, indulgent to his own weaknesses and others, wise and calm.
  11. Creativity allows you to completely change the worldview. Creativity develops the right brain, which helps us to do several things at the same time, without ignoring the details. It doesn't matter what kind of art you do. The process itself is so captivating that there is no time for sadness, melancholy and despondency. Much of what seemed unrealistically important and brought pain recedes and becomes secondary, and then completely disappears without a trace if a person is passionate about something. You can practice:
  • photography,
  • drawing,
  • singing,
  • dancing,
  • design, etc.

The main thing is that the work gives pleasure. Perhaps in the future it will be able to generate income. To realize yourself in something is very important!

Creative activity has amazing therapeutic properties. It allows you to survive the pain of loss, longing, hopelessness.

  1. Exercising tones the body and provokes a surge of happiness hormones.(and improve metabolism). And that is exactly what we are striving for. Therefore, regular exercise stress must be one of the points of the plan to change your life.
  2. Need to get out of your comfort zone. You don't have to do anything extreme to get started. It’s just worth visiting a place where you have never been, getting to work in a different way, changing appearance or image. Even the simple rearrangement of furniture helps. Sometimes leaving is a painful process, but more often than not, it is what spurs you on to start a new life. This is quite interestingly written in the book of the same name "How to get out of the comfort zone" by Brian Tracy (Brian Tracy) publishing house MYTH. It should be read by anyone who has decided to embark on the path of changing their lives.

  1. It is necessary to restore order in the financial sphere. Control of expenses and incomes, investments and other economic aspects must certainly be present in the plan of a person who wants to change his financial situation. Since nothing can unsettle as financial difficulties. A blow to the wallet stops us on the path to change and at such moments even think about creativity and healthy eating do not want. Include the problem of money in your Checklist: take an additional part-time job, pay your loan on time, change jobs, ask for a raise, etc.
  2. Throw out unnecessary things. Do not take them to a barn or garage, but to get rid of them or give them to someone. And constantly maintain a balance - acquiring a new one, removing the old one. Old things are the ballast of the past. Which reaches for you until you remove it from your eyes. To delete, you need to throw it away. Psychologists advise sorting through your things as often as possible and throwing away those that you have not used for more than one year. Internet is full of large quantity projects about getting rid of unnecessary things that really give results.

An interesting interview with a blogger who promotes and proves by personal example that it is possible and necessary to get rid of unnecessary things, as well as what this leads to.

  1. It is important to be able to accept the world "with all the giblets." Refuse assessments and analysis, take a neutral position, but rather a positive one. Very good teaches to see in everything positive sides Eleanor Porter's wonderful book Pollyanna. You should read it to the end, this girl, the heroine of the work, will teach anyone to enjoy life, even the most inveterate pessimist.
  2. Leave the past in the past. It needs to be done! To move on! No matter how good or bad this time may be, it will pull back, which is dangerous for positive change. We must say “thank you” to him for the lessons, experience, good impressions, pleasant memories and other positive moments and let him go in peace. The past has no place in the present, much less a happy future.

And you also need:

  • give more than take
  • share your knowledge,
  • do not be afraid and do not stop in front of obstacles,
  • do what you like;
  • develop;
  • to study;
  • change from within.

Of course, and that's not all. There is no limit to perfection. But all the ways to change life for the better come down to the fact that you need to change yourself first of all. And then the world will change in response!

But what is stopping you from starting a new life? The enemies of positive change are the mistakes that reformers make. It is they who lead to the fact that any positive decision ends in defeat and a return to the starting position, if not worse.

5 mistakes that stop positive change

  1. The main aggressor opposing positive changes is our brain. Very often people forget that its function is to save lives, and not to make a person financially secure and happy in all areas. And he perceives the usual way of life, the established way of life, as a safe niche for existence. Anything that goes beyond this will be perceived with hostility. That is everything new he considers dangerous and threatening human life.

Therefore, when making an important decision to start positive changes, it is important to agree first with yourself.. Failures will be avoided not by the specifics of the goals (although it is also extremely important), but by the simplicity of the steps to achieve it. That is, the most immodest aspiration should be painted in such a way that our defender does not have a desire to give a signal to record a dream as unrealizable.

This influence itself is easy to notice when one specific positive thought in terms of changes for the better, there are a million thoughts-excuses from implementing the goal in life. For example, did you decide to run every morning? How about:

  • Bad weather?
  • Will people watch?
  • Sneakers are not normal!
  • I don't have the energy to do anything today!

Therefore, you need to think through everything to the smallest detail!

  1. It is often believed that in order to start changes, you only need to make a decision and that's it, then somehow everything will turn out by itself. Of course, a solution is needed. But in order to achieve the goal, it must be specific. Well, it’s not enough to say: “That’s it, I’m starting a new life tomorrow!” Without having an idea of ​​what it will be like in principle. If there is no clearly defined task, there is no understanding of what exactly the result should be, then all the advice on how to change your life for the better may be useless. Because the lack of specifics deprives the brain of the ability to understand the goal and issue a solution to the problem in the form of steps to action.
  1. The third mistake is the desire to achieve something without an appropriate supportive environment. This is real, of course, but it will require a huge amount of mental strength and nerves, the presence of the most iron willpower in the world and persistent indestructible motivation.

There will always be someone (and more than one) who will undermine confidence, strongly persuade you to turn off a new life path. Perhaps they will be close friends. Of course, you should not break off expensive relationships. But enlisting the support of a community that would share the views on a new life is very important.

  1. Another mistake that many who embark on a path of change make is the lack of encouragement. They should be for even the slightest achievement. Because everything needs balance. And it is necessary that the discomfort from the changes (and it will be) is equalized by pleasant, albeit small, but gifts to oneself. For example, for a week of proper nutrition - good cream for the body you have long dreamed of. For a month - a beautiful dress. It is, of course, for women. Men have their own stimulants and motivations.
  1. Mistake number 5 - do not tell anyone about your decision to start a new life. It comes from the fear that nothing will work out. And in fact, it leads to the fact that it is not possible to implement the plan. A saving thought arises in my head: “It’s good that I didn’t tell anyone anything,” etc. In general, a vicious circle. It is not right. You need to speak about your decision, and loudly and confidently. This fact imposes some obligations and indicates the seriousness of intentions. And gives strength and energy for success!

Audacity and courage in any undertaking are the components of future success. But besides this, some other aspects are important.

  1. Start your day right. Avoid office conversations in the morning tapa “How tired I am of morning traffic. Wish the work day was over. The kids don't listen to me at all, I'm exhausted. I'm completely exhausted." Think about the pleasant things in your life, smile more often. Mentally fix every time you think about the negative and transform it into a positive direction.
  2. Appreciate what you have. We constantly want to achieve something, get something that is not on this moment. Is always. Having acquired one, we immediately begin to think about the next item on the wish list, which is endlessly updated. And there is no time to just enjoy what you have. And it turns out that life is a game where you have to constantly think about how to move to another level. But still, it is very important to stop at least for a short moment and thank the higher powers for everything. The ability to thank yourself, God, the Universe for what you have important point which is often underestimated. Saying grateful phrases to yourself allows you to realize the good that you have, gives you the strength to receive a new one.
  3. Take responsibility for yourself. You need to realize that everything that happens is the result of a choice once made. Don't blame others for your own problems. On the contrary, you should get together and start right now to change the situation created by your own hands and thoughts. And then do not forget that no one else can control your life, cope with obstacles and be responsible for your actions and actions. It's difficult, but necessary. An outsider can influence the choice, but only you make it!
  4. Help other people, take care of loved ones. Like it or not, love begets love, and a good deed always returns to its source.
  5. Listen to your inner voice, trust your intuition.
  6. Forgive yourself and others. We all know that forgiveness is the best medicine for the soul. We know, but we continue to bear resentment in our hearts for years, destroying ourselves and our lives with this poison.
  7. Eliminate forever from your being such phenomena as laziness and fear. They are the main obstacles on the road to happiness. Laziness arises because you cannot be transported to another life with one click. To do this, you need to work incessantly, constantly act, which you really don’t want to do. But fear can only lead to the fact that, without daring to step into a new life, you will have to end the old one, without knowing what real happiness and joy are.
  8. Don't beat yourself up if something doesn't work out.. It is better to praise for efforts and encourage further action, rather than assure yourself of your own worthlessness and abandon all your undertakings.
  9. Accept what can't be changed. Leave it alone. And then so you can all your best years spend on fighting what isn't worth it.
  10. Need to live own life, not someone else's. Therefore, you should determine your true desires and goals, and go only towards them, and not fulfill someone else's will imposed from outside.
  11. End the day right. Never lie down in bad mood and in no case do not swear with loved ones before going to bed. Go to bed on time, even if you feel that you still have the strength to work. You'll get it right in the morning.
  12. Remember that there is always the potential inside to change your life for the better.. And for this you don’t need “tomorrow”, “Monday”, “when I lose weight”, etc. You can and should start right now!

Go back to your wish list. Review it again and know that all of this is achievable. But you need to understand that even the most shabby dream will remain so if you do nothing and continue to live in the power of stereotypes. Expand the boundaries of your consciousness, learn, develop, change yourself. And then amazing changes will not keep you waiting.

A must watch video on how to change your life. "Instruction for Life"

Millions of people are thinking about how to start a new life and change themselves, but they do nothing.

Let's find out how any person can become completely different.

Is it possible?

Can a person change drastically?

Can you change your temperament? Can you change your life scenario, fate?

To begin with, it is important to answer the question: is a person capable of changing so that practically become a different person?

When we live in certain conditions, nothing new happens around us, then there is no incentive for development. In this case, it is almost impossible to change, especially if there is no motivation.

Man lives in his comfort zone. Yes, he has a small salary, an unsuccessful personal life, but he continues to seem to want to change everything, but at the same time does nothing. always scary.

Our actions, goals, motivation are influenced by the factors that have developed in the process. social development features of the psyche and personality. The basis of character, what is given to us at birth, is.

Type of nervous system it is almost impossible to change, although it is quite possible to learn to act differently, to develop specific traits in oneself.

For example, if he wants to be more active, sociable, then he will have to try and work on himself. quite capable of learning to control himself, although it is given to him with difficulty.

Over character traits can also work.

If you don't like certain personality traits, develop a plan to get rid of them.

There is a theory that we are destined for a certain fate, and we can't change it. However, the examples of many people refute this theory. For example, people born with flaws.

They could live on a disability pension and be content with that. But there are those who, despite the difficulties, work, achieve, become famous and respected people.

Part of the script is written into us from childhood. Parents, the closest environment instill in us attitudes, shape the character. Childhood trauma is especially strong.

But that doesn't mean that have to deal with it. It is in our power to change the script prescribed in us by our parents, we just need to identify what prevents us from becoming successful and achieving what we want.

What can be changed in yourself?

What would I like to change about myself? Yes almost anything. If you want to be more liberated, learn oratory, go to courses, trainings.

You do not like your temper - yoga classes will help. You understand that the muscles are weak, you are inferior to other people in endurance - why not go in for sports.

AT modern world a huge number of possibilities.

And it's not that we can't, but that we don't want to, we're afraid, we're lazy, we don't want to leave our familiar comfort zone.

But that's the only way change happens.

How to know what you want to change:

  • write your own and personality traits, evaluate what you would like to keep and what to get rid of;
  • list your accomplishments;
  • write what you would like to achieve, but have not achieved;
  • think about what prevented you from getting what you wanted;
  • who do you blame for the failures - external world, parents, yourself;

If you can't decide on your own, then go to see a psychologist. He will conduct the appropriate tests and help you choose the direction of travel.

Choose a professional coach who deals specifically with the problem of self-development.

Where to begin?

How to change life for the better? Any change starts somewhere. They don't happen on their own. The exception is psychotraumatic situations when sharp reassessment of values.

Where to begin? Understand what exactly you want to change. Be realistic about your personality, achievements and mistakes. Don't be afraid to get to know yourself. Sometimes we know that we have some shortcomings, but consciousness does not adequately assess them.

If you can't do it yourself, ask people you trust.

Be prepared for criticism And don't be offended if you don't hear what you want.

Change is about motivation. Set goals for yourself: why change, what you want to achieve in the end, in what time frame.

How to change?

Now we move on to the most difficult stage: the process of changing your personality and life.

Your personality beyond recognition

Outward manifestation of personality this is our feature. If you know your weaknesses, work on them.

  1. Change your schedule drastically. Write a daily schedule, remove all unnecessary things that prevent you from reaching your goal.
  2. Pay attention to life successful people: read their biography, find out how they went to their goal, what obstacles they overcame. Get inspired by their experience.
  3. Learn something new every day.
  4. Change your social circle. The social environment has a strong influence on us, it can inspire or bring us down.

    Eliminate losers, whiners, pessimists from your circle.

  5. Work on your character traits - improve the positive ones and try to get rid of the negative ones.

Inner world

How to change internally? Are you a pessimist or an optimist, or do you consider yourself a realist?

We see the world in black colors, pay attention to the negative, as a result, life gets worse and worse, and positive events disappear from our lives.

Try to look at the world with different eyes. It's not easy, especially at the beginning.

When you wake up, smile. Just smile to the new day even if your waiting hard work, general cleaning, a trip to a state institution.

Remember - you create your own world.

Do a little exercise: imagine that there is light around you, you radiate radiance into the world, and all people notice it. White, gentle light, emitting kindness, energy, warmth

You will see how your day will go differently, you will be noticed, complimented, and yours will be much better.

Thinking positive

How to change your thoughts to positive? Every day find something positive around you. Let it be the little things first. It began to rain - the weather conducive to relaxation and reflection.

Get nasty in transport - perhaps the world wants you to pay attention to something or this is a test of your emotional stamina. See the city with different eyes- architecture, thousands of people rushing to work.

Communicate as little as possible with negative people. Even if you consider them your friends, negativity is contagious.

That's why look for those with whom it is pleasant to communicate with whom you feel at ease, who increases your energy, and does not take away.

Positive thinking takes practice. At first it will be difficult to look for a positive, it will seem to you that everything is bad. But after three weeks, you will be surprised to notice how the world began to change, and you along with it.

Beliefs

First, decide if you really need to change them. If other people demand it, remember, beliefs - features of your personality. Don't change just because others want you to.

If you really want to change your beliefs, then read more, evaluate opinions, facts, look for the right ones.

Lifestyle

Everything is simple - start doing something right now. Not tomorrow, Monday, or New Year's Eve, but from now. If you want to get rid of a bad habit, do it immediately, do not wait for the right moment, because it will not come.

If you want to get up earlier - set an alarm, if one is not enough - set three. You will start to get used to the new regimen in a few days.

Waste a lot of time on useless activities - just stop doing them now- disable social networks, remove the TV from the house, stop meeting people who take up your time and do not benefit you.

habits

How to force yourself to change your habits? Motivation is what matters.

Answer yourself a question Why do you want to change your habits? Look to the future.

If you smoke, then remember about the health, wrinkles, sagging skin, lung problems that will certainly await you in a few years. Bad habits is early aging.

You want to have a fresh and blooming look for as long as possible, be active, like opposite sex- then get rid of the habit now. A person gets used to new conditions in about 21 days, you only need to hold out for three weeks.

Attitude to life

Develop your own optimism. Yes, everything seems to be bad. In fact, there are many beautiful things in the world. Life was hard at any time, but now we have so many opportunities that they must be used.

What gives you your pessimism? You see everything in black and gray. Worried about the health of a bad salary, evil people. So start living for yourself. Enjoy life for yourself. Work and achieve for yourself.

Stop complaining. Remember: complainers and whiners are not liked. If you want to be pitied, stop yourself. No one cares about our problems, but your complaints will repel really worthy and positive people from you.

How to change for the better?

For girl

girls love strong guys capable of deeds.

They prefer those who keep their word, who can be trusted, with whom it is not scary to go through life.

How to change:

  • develop;
  • forget about aimless pastime;
  • work;
  • allocate time for joint rest;
  • respect the girl;
  • give her time, but do not be too intrusive - there should not be an overabundance of attention, otherwise it will quickly get bored.

The most important- be purposeful, do not stop there.

For a guy

If you plan to live with a guy happily ever after, you will have to work on your personality.

No, in no case do you need to adapt to someone, remain yourself, but develop your best qualities.

What to do:

Worst thing you can think of... falsehood and pretense. Stay yourself, develop positive thinking and strive to be active in life.

Real stories of people

There are many examples of people who have decided to radically change their lives, and age is not a hindrance to this.

Daphne Selfe is 86 years old. Glory came to her after 70, when she decided to become a fashion model. Her husband died, the children became adults, and she faced a choice - like everyone else, spend old age in front of the TV or live for yourself.

Grant Aschats. Defeated cancer and fulfilled his dream - became a famous chef.

Susan Street is 59 years old. She dropped excess weight after 50 years, and since then her life began to change radically. She was able to survive the loss of a job, cancer, became a vegetarian, started her own blog and helps other people change.

There are thousands of such examples.

All you need is a push, a realization that your life is meaningless and wrong. Don't wait for the right moment, start changing from now on.

How to start a new life? 10 steps that will change you and your life:

Programmer, investor and entrepreneur James Altucher, who has already launched several startups, published a very simple, useful and honest guide on TechCrunch for those who want to radically change their field of activity, but do not know where to start. Below is a translation of this article.

Here's the deal: I've been at zero a few times, come back to life a few times, I've done it over and over again. I started new careers. The people who knew me then don't know me now. And so on.

I started my career from scratch several times. Sometimes - because my interests changed. Sometimes - because all the bridges were burned without a trace, and sometimes because I desperately needed money. And sometimes it was because I hated everyone at my previous job or they hated me.

There are other ways to reinvent yourself, so take my words with a grain of salt. This is what worked in my case. I've seen it work for about a hundred other people. From interviews, from letters that have been written to me over the past 20 years. You can try - or not.

1. Change never ends

Every day you rediscover yourself. You are always on the move. But every day you decide where exactly you are moving: forward or backward.

2. Start with a clean slate

All your past labels are just vanity. Have you been a doctor? An Ivy League graduate? Owned millions? Did you have a family? Nobody cares. You have lost everything. You are zero. Don't try to say that you are more than that.

3. You need a mentor

Otherwise, you will go under. Someone has to show you how to move and breathe. But don't worry about looking for a mentor (see below).

4. Three types of mentors

Straight. Someone who is ahead of you, who will show you how he got it. What does "this" mean? Wait. By the way, the mentors don't look like Jackie Chan's character in The Karate Kid. Most mentors will hate you.

Indirect. Books. Movies. You can get 90% of the instructions from books and other materials. 200-500 books equate to a good mentor. When people ask me, “What is a good book to read?” - I do not know what to answer them. There are 200-500 good books worth reading. I would turn to inspirational books. Whatever you believe in, strengthen your beliefs with daily reading.

Anything can be a mentor. If you are nobody and want to re-create yourself, everything you look at can become a metaphor for your desires and goals. The tree you see, with its roots out of sight and the groundwater that feeds it, is a metaphor for programming if you tie the dots together. And everything you look at will "connect the dots".

5. Don't Worry If Nothing Excites You

You care about your health. Start with it. Take small steps. You don't need passion to succeed. Do your job with love, and success will become a natural symptom.

6. Time it takes to reinvent yourself: five years

Here is a description of those five years.

Year 1: You wallow and read everything and just start doing something.

Year 2: You know who you need to talk to and keep working with. You do something every day. You finally understand what the map of your own game of Monopoly looks like.

Third year: You are good enough to start making money. But so far, perhaps not enough to earn a living.

Fourth year: You provide for yourself well.

Year 5: You make a fortune.

Sometimes I got frustrated in the first four years. I asked myself, "Why hasn't this happened yet?" - He beat his fist on the wall and broke his arm. It's okay, just keep going. Or stop and choose a new field of activity. It doesn't matter. Someday you will die, and then it will be really difficult to change.

7. If you do it too fast or too slow, then something is wrong.

A good example is Google.

8. It's not about the money

But money is a good measure. When people say, "It's not about the money," they need to be sure they have some other unit of measure. "How about just doing what you love?" There will be many days ahead when you don't like what you do. If you are doing it out of pure love, it will take much more than five years. Happiness is just a positive reaction from your brain. Some days you will be unhappy. Your brain is just a tool, it does not define who you are.

9. When can you say, "I'm doing X"? When does X become your new profession?

10. When can I start doing X?

Today. If you want to paint, buy a canvas and paints today, start buying 500 books one by one and paint pictures. If you want to write, do the following three things:

Read

If you want to start your own business, start coming up with an idea for a business. Rebuilding yourself starts today. Every day.

11. When will I earn money?

In a year, you will put 5,000-7,000 hours into this business. That's good enough to put you in the top 200-300 in the world in any major. Getting into the top 200 almost always provides a livelihood. By the third year, you will understand how to make money. By the fourth - you will be able to increase turnover and provide for yourself. Some stop there.

12. By year 5 you will be in the top 30-50 so you can make a fortune

13. How to determine what is mine?

Any area in which you are able to read 500 books. Go to the bookstore and find her. If after three months you get bored, go to the bookstore again. Getting rid of illusions is normal, this is the meaning of defeat. Success is better than failure, but the most important lessons we are defeated. Very important: do not rush. For my interesting life you can change yourself many times over. And fail many times. It's fun too. These attempts will turn your life into a story book, not a textbook. Some people want their life to be a textbook. Mine is a story book, good or bad. Therefore, changes occur every day.

14. The decisions you make today will be in your biography tomorrow.

Accept interesting solutions and you will have an interesting biography.

15. The decisions you make today will become part of your biology.

16. What if I like something exotic? Biblical archeology or 11th century wars?

Repeat the above steps and by the fifth year you will be rich. We don't know how. There is no need to look for the end of the path when you are only taking the first steps.

17. What if my family wants me to become an accountant?

How many years of your life did you promise to give to your family? Ten? All life? Then wait next life. You choose.

Choose freedom, not family. Freedom, not prejudice. Freedom, not government. Freedom, not the satisfaction of other people's requests. Then you will satisfy yours.

18. My mentor wants me to follow his path.

This is fine. Learn his way. Then do it your way. Sincerely.

Luckily no one puts a gun to your head. Then you would have to comply with his demands until he lowers the gun.

19. My husband (wife) is worried: who will take care of our children?

A person who changes himself always finds free time. Part of changing yourself is finding moments and reshaping them the way you would like to use them.

20. What if my friends think I'm crazy?

What are these friends?

21. What if I want to be an astronaut?

It's not about changing yourself. This is a specific profession. If you like space, there are many professions. Richard Branson wanted to be an astronaut and created Virgin Galactic.

22. What if I enjoy drinking and hanging out with friends?

Read this post again in a year.

23. And if I'm busy? Am I cheating on my spouse or betraying my partner?

Read this post again in two or three years, when you are broke, out of work, and everyone will turn their backs on you.

24. What if I can't do anything at all?

Read point 2 again.

25. What if I don't have a diploma or it's useless?

Read point 2 again.

26. What if I need to focus on paying off a mortgage or other loan?

Read point 19 again.

27. Why do I always feel like an outsider?

Albert Einstein was an outsider. No one in authority would have hired him. Everyone feels like an impostor sometimes. Greatest creativity born out of skepticism.

28. I can't read 500 books. Name one book to read for inspiration

Then you can immediately give up.

29. What if I'm too sick to change myself?

Change will spur production useful substances in your body: serotonin, dopamine, oxytocin. Move forward, and you may not get well at all, but you will get healthier. Don't use health as an excuse.

Finally, rebuild your health first. Sleep more. Eat better. Go in for sports. These are the key steps to change.

30. What if my partner set me up and I'm still suing him?

Drop the lawsuit and never think about him again. Half the problem was you.

31. And if they put me in jail?

Wonderful. Re-read point 2. Read more books in prison.

32. And if I'm a timid person?

Make weakness your strength. Introverts are better at listening and concentrating, they know how to arouse sympathy.

33. What if I can't wait five years?

If you plan to stay alive in five years, you can start today.

34. How to make contacts?

Build concentric circles. You must be in the middle. The next circle is friends and family. Then there are online communities. Then - people whom you know from informal meetings and tea parties. Then - conference participants and opinion leaders in their field. Then there are mentors. Then - customers and those who make money. Start making your way through these circles.

35. What if my ego gets in the way of what I do?

After six months or a year, you will return to point 2.

36. What if I am passionate about two things at once? And I can't choose?

Combine them and you will be the best in the world for this combination.

37. What if I'm so passionate that I want to teach others what I'm learning myself?

Read lectures on YouTube. Start with a one-person audience and see if it grows.

38. What if I want to earn money in my sleep?

In the fourth year, start outsourcing what you do.

39. How to find mentors and experts?

Once you have accumulated enough knowledge (after 100-200 books), write 10 ideas for 20 different potential mentors.

None of them will answer you. Write 10 more ideas for 20 new mentors. Repeat this every week.

40. What if I can't come up with ideas?

Then practice it. The mental muscles tend to atrophy. They need to be trained.

It will be difficult for me to reach my toes if I don't exercise every day. I have to do this exercise every day for some time before this posture comes easily to me. Don't expect good ideas from day one.

42. What if I do everything you say, but it still doesn't seem to work?

It will turn out. Just wait. Keep changing yourself every day.

Don't try to find the end of the path. You can't see it in the fog. But you can see the next step, and you will understand that if you take it, you will eventually reach the end of the path.

43. What if I start feeling down?

Sit in silence for an hour a day. You need to get back to your core.

If you think this sounds stupid, don't do it. Move on with your depression.

44. And if there is no time to sit in silence?

Then sit in silence for two hours a day. This is not meditation. You just have to sit.

45. And if I get scared?

Sleep 8-9 hours a night and never gossip. Sleep is the first secret good health. Not the only one, but the first. Some people write to me that four hours of sleep is enough for them, or that in their country those who sleep a lot are considered lazy. These people will fail and die young.

When it comes to gossip, our brains are biologically programmed to have 150 friends. And when you hang out with one of your friends, you can gossip about one of the other 150 friends. And if you don't have 150 friends, then the brain will want to read gossip magazines until it looks like it has 150 friends.

Don't be as stupid as your brain.

46. ​​And if everything seems to me that I will never succeed?

Practice gratitude for 10 minutes a day. Don't suppress your fear. Notice your anger.

But also allow yourself to be grateful for what you have. Anger never inspires, but gratitude never inspires. Gratitude is the bridge between your world and parallel universe where all creative ideas live.

47. And if I constantly have to deal with some kind of personal squabbles?

Find other people to be around.

A person who changes himself will constantly meet people who try to suppress him. The brain is afraid of change - it can be unsafe. Biologically, the brain wants you to be safe, and change is a risk. So your brain will give you people trying to stop you.

Learn to say no.

Good afternoon friends! Elena Melnikova is with you. Have you met absolutely happy people? Those that sparkle with a joyful smile and illuminate the world around with their eyes? There are few of them, but they do exist. I hope this article helps you become one of them.

Absolute happiness, which is based (based) on harmony with oneself, the world and the ability to gratefully accept everything that exists, is not only a gift, but also daily labor souls. This is the ideal we all aspire to. But the most important thing to understand is that our happiness is in our hands.

The components of happiness, of course, each has its own. But in any case, one cannot do without accepting oneself - one's personality and way of life.

Does everyone live the way they want? Alas... A lot of restrictions dictated by a sense of duty, financial problems, failures and stereotypes regularly build us a line of obstacles on the way to a dream. And we, resigned, continue to bend under the weight of discontent.

Humility good quality. And it, too, is a gift and spiritual work. But, as the “Prayer for Peace of Mind” says: “Lord, give me peace of mind to accept what I cannot change, give me courage to change what I can change, and give me wisdom to distinguish one from another” . Therefore, do not forget that, in addition to humility, life is given to us for development and change. For the better.

“Man is created for happiness, like a bird for flight” (V. G. Korolenko). “If you want to be happy - be it” (Kozma Prutkov).

We simply must hang these words at the head of our bed and confirm them with daily efforts to bring them to life. No pessimism. Without distrust in their own abilities. No fear of failure.

Phrases about the comfort zone, like a cocoon, twisted from stereotypes and habits and, like a web, dragging us into everyday life, have already become commonplace. I don’t want to, but I have to repeat them over and over again so that everyone thinks: “Is this how I want to live? Am I happy? Are you satisfied with the status quo? And what gives me true joy?

Do not think, I am by no means claiming that our everyday life is an annoying routine burden that needs to be thrown off as soon as possible. No, everyday life around us can also be beautiful, if only you merge harmoniously with it.

But, if you still feel that you live in discord with yourself, do not have the opportunity to realize your potential and as if you are living someone else's life, it's time to act. Boldly and decisively!

So how can you change your life for the better? Remember (what a sad word... No, don't forget!) your main dream. Tell yourself where and with whom you would like to live, what to do, what to think about before going to bed. Have you spoken? Now start walking towards your dream in small (or immediately large) steps.

To help you, I will give three stories from the lives of my friends. These people were able to step out of their comfort zone, challenge their habits, and set out to meet their desires. Some of them I have known for several years, some for several months, but well enough to admire their courage and readiness for change.

So, the first story, slightly reminiscent of the tale of Cinderella

Alyonushka was born in an ordinary Nizhny Novgorod village in a friendly large family. Life never spoiled her, and therefore, from the age of 15, Alena got a job. At first it was a part-time job as an administrator in children's center, night shifts in the grocery store, then employment in a cafe and, finally, in a beauty salon and a fitness club.

By the age of 23, Alena was the administrator of a large shopping center and had dozens of people under his command. She liked the work, leading people was her vocation. Along the way, she worked as an administrator of a beauty salon and had the opportunity to look great for little money. But she knew it was temporary. I wanted more.

Life in Nizhny Novgorod, despite the closeness of relatives and the abundance of friends, seemed boring to her. Moscow more and more often beckoned our heroine, and one day she took a one-way ticket.
This story is not about how Cinderella conquered Moscow. This is a story about how Alena was looking for herself.

In Moscow, after wandering around friends for a month and eating more than one dog in search of rental housing, a brave girl found an inexpensive apartment in the center and a neighbor with whom they shared the rent. All this time she was looking for a job, but did not grab the first offer that came across. It must be a dream job. One for which it was worth going to the metropolis.

Finally, the girl got the position of project coordinator in a website development company. She had to learn a lot new information and fit into a tough team. However, if Alena coped with her duties perfectly, then the team was not easy. The superior men made it clear that, in addition to direct ones, Alena needed to perform some more duties. Alena did not bend.

The desire to change something in her life again bit her desperately. But the wise office worker endured two years to gain the right experience and then changed jobs. Simply put, from customers moved to their own customers.

The new job gave much more satisfaction, but could not withstand the difficult economic situation. Department after department was closed. Alyona was made redundant.

And then, at one fine moment, circumstances (oh, great word!) developed in such a way that Alyona's skills helped her find. More precisely, the work itself found it. A friend, and part-time partner, recommended Alena to the contractors of the closing company. The salary was half as much, but the opportunity to work without visiting the office attracted me more than any money. Now Alena was engaged in Internet advertising.

Together with a new job, the girl traveled to her parents in the village, to friends in the country, and even to the Netherlands for an internship (yes, remote workers do have internships). With remote work, Alena was able to organize her working day in accordance with biorhythms, desires and habits. I started practicing yoga and found time for business English courses.

But the story doesn't end there. Remote work instilled (or, let's say, finally instilled) in the girl a love of freedom and gave her an understanding of the optimal organization of the work process. And Alyonka does not have organizational skills.

So, our heroine, having calculated all the risks in her mind (and whoever does not risk, you know yourself ...), organized her own company to create websites and related services. The business is developing, but, most importantly, it brings moral satisfaction. And it's worth it!

Elena is from small town Ivanovo region. Her father was a teacher, loved animals very much and even went on business with a tame piglet. Since childhood, Elena dreamed of working as a veterinarian.

But, when it was time to go to college, her parents explained to Elena that a veterinarian is an extremely unprestigious profession and she would have to settle in the village forever and “twist the tails of cows on the farm.” Elena went to the pedagogical one.

Elena is an excellent teacher. Children love her for her conscientious work and cordial attitude. But life in a service apartment in Nizhny Novgorod did not appeal to a lover of nature and fluffy animals of all stripes. She and her husband already had a house in a small semi-abandoned village.

Near the hut, rebuilt from something for many years (and gradually turned into a two-story house), unprecedented flowers were already blooming, and future homemade blanks were growing. And one day chickens settled there.

And then it went like clockwork. Following the chickens, rabbits started up (it all started with one pair), then the incubator started working, and all this was clearly going to spend the winter. At first, Elena and Alexander visited their pets every weekend.

Each trip was perceived as an exciting journey to favorite places. And later, when Alexander retired, the couple decided to permanently move to their beloved village.

By that time, the children had already grown up, but the animals required more and more trouble. And the zealous owners decided to completely move to the village. Elena did not wait for her retirement. Instead, she made a suitable schedule for herself at work and travels to work in a city 120 km away every 4 days.

The city is tiring, but at the same time it is a place for buying feed and marketing agricultural products. And it cannot be counted, because sheep, goats and pigs appeared on the farm, and the total livestock has grown to such an extent that the number of “all together” is incalculable.

And let it be necessary to get up, as they say, before dawn, even if in the evening a pleasant ache is felt in the body, but every day the spouses meet with joy, and the children try to come to the village every free minute.

The third story is fantastic.

Sometimes, to find your way, you need to deviate sharply from it.

Anna is a very young girl, she is only 19. She grew up in Tatarstan. At the age of 17, she moved from her native city to the capital of the republic. She started her career from the bottom, but then in a large company. At one fine moment (and again an accident?), the manager urgently needed a person to replace him. Anyuta was given the following conditions: if she copes, she will remain in office. Anya did it.

By the age of 19, Anna held a high position in a well-known automobile company. The salary was enough to rent an apartment in the center of Kazan and not deny yourself anything. But the flip side of the coin - work for wear, the almost complete lack of time for sleep and rest - made itself felt. Increasingly, Anna asked herself the question: in the name of what is all this? The neurosis grew.

One night Anya turned on the TV and watched a movie about a woman who critical situation went out into the field, shouted everything that had accumulated in her soul, and after that she adjusted her life.

The way out has been found!

Without thinking twice, Anyuta threw on her coat, grabbed a handbag and called a taxi to the nearest wasteland. The starry sky and the cold March night awaited her revelations.

At dawn, Anya walked to the house. The road was as silent and deserted as it had been at night, but the silence was the backdrop for condescending insights. Anya understood: now she wants to fly away.

The rising sun found Anya at the airport. Anya flew to the Crimea. Not coming home. Not collecting things. Not saying goodbye to anyone. And that's why the director's call was so far away ... So far away that Anyuta has not yet written a letter of resignation. She just left.

Arriving in Simferopol, literally, in what and with what she was (there was a passport, a pack of cigarettes and 5,000 rubles in her purse), Anyuta began to live according to the laws of countless romantic vagabonds: fleeting acquaintances, a complete separation from reality and boundless fun.

Having received free time, Anya learned to appreciate every moment of it. Now she began to listen to herself and think about what kind of lifestyle suits her.

Friends took Anya sometimes for several weeks. But there came a moment when it was necessary to leave the most hospitable houses. Anya was not afraid. She was free as the wind. Without money. Mom only topped up her mobile account.

About the difficulties suffered on the way (and it was both rain and cold), Anna says this: “I spent the night in the most beautiful and picturesque places on the south coast and ate healthy food cooked in spring water.”

The most interesting thing is that the things that Anya sincerely needed came to her by themselves. People gave her summer dresses, a swimsuit, shoes, a blanket and even a tent. At that moment, when we met and sunbathed in Foros, swimming goggles (and this is not a metaphor) sailed to her - this summer's dream.

Anna: “My path was beautiful and unique. I was accompanied by mountains, the sea, beautiful people, animals and birds. In addition, music accompanied me.

I received my harmonica as a gift in Fox Bay, where I learned to play. I played music on the embankments, which brought me enough money to buy food and cigarettes. I did not feel poor and unhappy for a minute.

Six months ago, at the beginning of my journey, I would never have thought that tens of thousands of kilometers of walking and hitchhiking would change my world SO drastically.”

Miraculous facts only confirm the idea that with the disappearance of the usual comfort, new opportunities open up for us. You just need to know how to use them.

Anyuta used it until she understood what she wanted from life: she would create and share her experience with others.

In August, Anya returned to her homeland. Competently prioritizing, she thought about choosing a profession (which will certainly be associated with creativity), and is currently going to go to China and India for inspiration. And I firmly believe that she will succeed.

These three beautiful women left a deep mark on my life. Each of them knows what he wants, and firmly goes to his goal. And, if suddenly the goals change, each will be ready for a sharp turn. But all these goals can be reduced to one - harmony with oneself and happiness.

People who have changed their lives, despite fears, stereotypes and their own insecurities, are themselves changing for the better. At a minimum, they become more open, bold and determined. In addition, adapting to a new situation forces a change in thinking, improving its flexibility and expanding horizons. So, it's definitely worth a try.

I myself have repeatedly had to turn life 90, and sometimes 180 degrees. Break your own stereotypes, radically change your views and principles and, most importantly, follow them.

Therefore, I developed some algorithm of actions for a cardinal upheaval in fate:

  1. Drop all fears. If that doesn't work, think about your biggest fear and make sure it's not so bad after all. (For example: the worst thing that can happen if I change jobs (move to another area) is that I will have very little money. But this is not the worst thing, because in a pinch I can get a job in such and such a position, but in general, I write articles (and some of you bake cakes or sew clothes) to order).
  2. Don't know where to start? Take the first step. Convince yourself that this is only the first step, which will not affect anything, does not oblige you to anything, and, in which case, everything can be ended here. In fact, your first step affects a lot, and by taking a step, you will move to a new level of consciousness and achieve your own goal, which you can no longer refuse. Moreover, if you are on the right track, then see for yourself how everything starts to work out from the first step. In the future, of course, there will be difficulties, but the biggest difficulty - to decide on changes, is already behind us.
  3. Treat the difficulties that arise in your path as tests and tempering of character. Believe that all of them were sent down to you in order to show your true capabilities. In addition, do not forget that overcoming obstacles, coupled with drastic changes, in no time relieves depression caused by routine and everything that develops against its background. Proven in my own skin!
  4. When most of the path has already been passed, it makes no sense to stop. But it always makes sense to adjust plans along the way. The main thing at the same time is not to break the contract with the dream.
  5. Ask the Lord for help in business. If you don't believe in God, ask people. Support, advice, a small favor. Ask and it will be given to you.
  6. Praise yourself for small but significant accomplishments. Think further. Think about how things can be improved. And believe in success.

Be happy, dear readers! Don't be afraid of change!

Have questions?

Report a typo

Text to be sent to our editors: