A long love story with a man that you experienced together before you decided to get married does not give you the confidence that you know your future husband perfectly! And we must accept that even living together side by side, we will never be able to distinguish all the smallest nuances. What can you do to make your family life as peaceful as possible? First of all, look at your chosen one without rose-colored glasses in order to soberly accept all his advantages and disadvantages. Below you will find 10 things you need to know about men if you are getting married.

1) They constantly need your approval.

Despite the fact that your husband may seem brave, proud and independent, he, like girls, needs the approval of his half. Only in this way can he be self-confident, feel needed and know that his girlfriend appreciates him.

2) They don't say the right words at the right time

Men, behind a rare minority, do not know how to say beautiful words at the right time, like handsome men from ladies' novels. It's just not in their DNA. If you give up the idea of ​​hearing such a fiery speech, you will notice what you wanted to hear in male gestures and actions. Undoubtedly, this is love, despite a different way of expressing it.

3) They are interested in fashion

Your man is as vain as you are. Don't you understand this yet? Only by starting a life together and distributing the wardrobe, you will finally understand how much time and effort men spend on creating their image. They are just shy by nature and keep their love of fashion under wraps for fear of being ridiculed. Give your chosen one a few compliments, ask him for advice about your clothes and you will learn a lot about your man.

4) They easily lose track of the conversation

Don't beat around the bush! If something goes wrong, tell him about it directly, without unnecessary embellishment. Men can simply get lost in the flow of your words and not catch the most important thing.

5) They don't change, but...

If you choose the right strategy and are able to clearly explain what you need for female happiness, then your man will be able to do it. He will go out of his way to give you what you want if he truly loves you.

6) They are not sure about the beauty of their body

If you tell him that he's put on weight, that's terrible! Men are also not sure of their physical perfection, just like women. If you don't want him to start making love to you with the lights off or sleeping with a pillow on his stomach, then forget about his physical handicaps and give him more compliments.

7) They need personal space

Don't keep your man on a leash! We all need our own space, and your husband is no exception. Sometimes your man needs to stay without you. Give him some time to devote to his hobbies, friends, or thoughts.

8) They can do housework

Forget about the stereotype of the husband lounging on the couch. If your man tells you, "I can do it, no need to call a plumber," give him that opportunity! There is no need to be afraid in advance that he will not succeed.

9) They are always competing

Do not be surprised, but men always and everywhere see an occasion for competition in which they must demonstrate their strength and win. That is why they are fascinated by sports such as football, hockey or racing.

10) They have selective hearing

Men don't hear everything that women say to them. This state of affairs can be a serious test for family relationships, because they simply do not remember much of what you said. But husbands cannot be blamed for this, because the fact that they have selective hearing is a scientifically proven fact!

We think we know everything about our men, but this is far from the case. We hope that knowing these 10 points will make your family life much happier.

Once we conducted a survey among women: "Tell me, what kind of man should be next to you?" At first, women answered that a man nearby needed to earn a lot, be strong and reliable.

After some thought, everyone added that it is very important that a man loves to be gentle and caring with a woman.

In fact, this is the essence of a real man, the core of his psyche. This is tenderness, flexibility, caring, gentleness and the ability to provide support. Who wouldn't want such a man? In life, everything happens exactly the opposite: as a rule, in a family a man is tough, often aggressive. Although at work he can show his most remarkable qualities: responsiveness, attentiveness, desire to help and ability to support. I can say from practice that the tougher the man in the family, the weaker he is in life. You can't judge a person by just one area of ​​her life. The more manifestations, the better it is seen: what kind of husband, father or son he is, what a professional.

The topic of masculinity is interesting because by analyzing it, we can talk about how to properly interact with men and women, how to raise boys, how to better develop your masculinity and what is the true driving force for men. We can get many answers to such questions in the analysis of what is the core of masculinity.

True masculinity sprouts only on the feminine principle.

According to the theory of Carl Gustav Jung, the human psyche is based on the so-called anima and animus - unconscious images of the feminine in a man and the masculine in a woman. I propose to consider in detail the male psyche.

Anima, in other words, the feminine principle in the psyche, is responsible for the manifestation of precisely feminine qualities - care, tenderness, love and kindness. And it is this beginning in a man that women like so much. Ask any woman what kind of man she would like and how she would like him to court. Indeed, they often say: coffee in bed, so that he cooks, speaks magnificent words, so that he is gentle and attentive. And note that all women, when they talk about their beloved man, repeat exactly such epithets that, at first glance, it would be more appropriate to talk about their mother.

In fact, if this feminine principle is manifested in a man, then all the seeds of masculinity in the form of chivalry, strength, pressure, energy, achievements and wealth germinate on this soil.

The more fertile the soil, the stronger the sprouts

If this soil does not exist at all, or the soil is weak and inefficient, then the fruits will not be viable, with frail sprouts. Such a man will not delight a woman. The weakest man is the one who has this field with the feminine principle small and weak. When a man is tough, he deliberately demonstrates his masculine qualities, but in fact he does not have them inside. This is because masculine qualities are implanted externally. If a man does not have that fertile field in the form of a manifested anima, there is always a feeling that he is artificial, weak, that if only the wind blows stronger, the male pomposity will go somewhere. And if it really sprouted, then we see how unbending this force is, how much a man is able to love, be faithful, very strong and courageous. It's very attractive.

Where are all the real men?

Since childhood, the core of our psyche in the form of a masculine or feminine principle has been destroyed in us. How do they do it with boys? When they say: “You're a boy, don't cry! You are a boy! You can't be so gentle and sensitive! You couldn’t fight back, couldn’t this and that - who are you after that? Since childhood, men had to endure such humiliation. Of course they have to protect themselves. Of course, there is uncertainty. Of course, they become addicted to the amount of money. How much money, so much self-respect. They have to make people respect themselves, if only through money.

It is impossible to destroy men, especially at such a young, childish, fragile age. When the whole male become is only revealed in a boy through his ability to love, through his tenderness, touchingness, purity, sensitivity, the ability to empathize, pity, the ability to show tenderness, understanding, admiration for female beauty and love. If this does not happen, then we will destroy the true knight. And we will walk the world with an outstretched hand in the hope that someday on our way we will meet a real knight, a real man who will protect, warm and become a life partner with whom you will not have anything impossible.

How to form the feminine principle of the psyche in a child?

Boys in childhood are more sensitive and vulnerable. In no case should you tell them: "Don't cry, you're a boy." Cries - hug him, give him the opportunity to cry. You will say: “But then he will not form into a man!”. This is how real men are formed. This has been tested on more than one generation of men.

When you see that the boy is in pain, hug him, ask him what worries him, talk to him. He should not feel that he is bad, that he is to blame, that he will make a bad man. On the contrary, the more female manifestations in this period - tenderness, softness, warmth, even weakness, over time a magnificent man can come out of it. If you don't break it.

Somewhere you need to prompt, somewhere to ask: “What do you think, what to do?” Ask questions, and the child himself will slowly form. You only need to understand and help him once, and you will see - over time, the child will cry less. It is worth supporting once - this support gives tremendous strength. And if you constantly scold - the child will cry more often. At the same time, you don’t have to say: “What a strong and brave you are.” How strong is he if he is crying now? He understands that he is not strong.

Let him be weak, just love him. Let him cry, just ask. And when he calms down a bit, let him tell you this situation. He will tell, share with you and immediately wake up, become active and automatically show masculine qualities. The most important thing during this period is not to sow the boys the seed of guilt, inferiority, in the form of the fact that he does not deserve love. He must be sure of your love. And love for a child is, above all, understanding.

Do not say phrases: "You must, you must!". Ask instead, "Can you help me?" So you form the beginnings of his knightly qualities, which with age will develop into such benefits for you. Raise a child now - and then as a mother you will be the most joyful and happy. If you do this, you will see. For some, the behavior of children changes within two days. Try it, it works.

In order to properly raise children, you need to clearly understand who you want to get in adulthood, what kind of fate you want for your child.

Stop rejecting your natural warmth

Men often reject their warmth, softness and tenderness. It gets inside and is perceived as "unmasculinity". When a man is left alone with life and difficult times overtake him, he becomes defenseless. The courage is gone. Often, when a man is in trouble, you can see that there is no masculinity in him at all. This happens to almost all men. Rare men do not hesitate. And how does a man try to make up for it? Through money. And you can’t make up for this, and the man begins to run for money and gets into the rat race. As we know, sooner or later this will lead to a dead end.

Therefore, in order to strengthen your masculinity, become internally stronger and more confident, we suggest starting with the most elementary. Of course, everything is very individual, but all the men with whom I had to work said that they could not show everything that they had accumulated inside. Therefore, step by step, you need to start activating your feminine. What does it mean? Start showing your loved ones tenderness, gentleness and your love. This is the field in which your true masculinity then sprouts. At home, in the family, it is important for a man to be able to show feelings: to be warm and fluffy, to talk about his anxieties and worries, as well as his love for the family. Outside the home, at work, he can be very tough, and that's okay. He knows how true he must be in his family and how true he must be at work.

Only by accepting and strengthening his natural feminine, a man can become stronger. Get to know yourself, accept and reveal everything that is inherent in us from birth, this will help you discover your true self and be surprised at how much more wonderful you have.

Here you go! Again you are upset, because he said or did not say, did or did not do something that his masculine nature tells him, which, alas, he cannot change. And now, in the offices of psychologists, a hackneyed record sounds again and again: “You know what they are, men!”, “He is a man after all!”, And desperate “Men!”. Try repeating these phrases to your girlfriends over a cocktail! I bet they'll either smile or nod their heads knowingly. Of course, this is just a defensive reaction and your girlfriends are just subconsciously trying to reduce their frustration in a strong field. But such a tendency to belittle men as genetically less developed only strengthens their conviction that it is dangerous to be close to a woman (and even with your soulmate!).

To begin with, it is important to note that, according to research, men and women have more similarities than differences. We have almost the same brain structure, similar needs for love and acceptance, in achieving goals, and we all want the same thing from life. Differences in small nuances, although important, are certainly not sufficient to proclaim men as aliens, which women are not always happy with.

The socialization of men begins in childhood, when all kinds of educators force the boy to conform to cultural values ​​that carry a certain image of masculinity. The most important of them: control of emotions, win at any cost and never show your vulnerability. The same representatives of the stronger sex who do not meet cultural norms are often popularly called "sissies" and "rags" and are subjected to social condemnation. But, ladies, food for thought: Research shows that men who find it necessary to live up to this ironclad image of masculinity often suppress the emotions of vulnerability that are so necessary for romantic intimacy with their partner.

Unfortunately, women with their behavior sometimes only reinforce this stereotype of masculinity. So let's keep in mind the following five points outlined by Dr. Jill Weber, which will make life much easier for us and especially for our men!

Society has long explained to men that their value lies in their ability to act, take responsibility, control, achieve, win (otherwise, our hero will be despised). Don't let this superficial part fool you! Beneath it all is a child who, like you, wants to feel unconditional love. He wants to know that someone will still be there for him, even when he stops winning and overworking. Moreover, he cannot tell you this, and when he is not pleased with himself, you may not even know it. Unlike women, your man has a lot of trouble talking about his weaknesses and emotions. If you keep it in mind, you will notice other important things in it. How funny he is, how much you enjoy spending time with him and discussing your day - start a dialogue about his essence, and not about his affairs.

1. He wants you to love yourself.
   

If you use it to feel good, to think better of yourself, its efforts will never be enough, and you will be constantly on the lookout for the next "source" of strength. Your partner may experience this as an addiction that can become burdensome, limiting their freedom and autonomy. In addition, there is a correlation among the weaker sex between the refusal to accept oneself and the tendency to criticize and overcontrol one's partner. Such a girl projects onto others those qualities that she tries not to notice in herself. In other words, if you are unhappy with yourself, then you are overly critical of your man. As a general rule, feedback from significant people should be 75% positive and only 25% negative. If the ratio is reversed, you are constantly hurting your loved ones, they feel under constant pressure and call it "pilezhka". Under constant criticism, your lover begins to think that he can never do anything right, and this, in turn, leads to the desire to adapt to others, not take the lead, avoid women, and in some cases, erectile dysfunction .

1. He wants you to know that he can communicate.

What a surprise: all the statements that men are simply not able to communicate are complete nonsense! Remember: men can! And all the opposite statements only reinforce this stereotype, leaving our boys either the role of a silent man, or dialogues at the level of the seventh grade. And here we are again witnessing an already familiar process: a man is already afraid to open his mouth so that he is not considered emotional and soft and is not awarded with another flattering epithet. If you catch yourself on such phrases, stop immediately and give the floor to the man. Of course, verbalism is easier for women - we talk more, faster and more concisely about feelings, but for your man this is all new, he often does not know what to say, cannot identify his feelings - treat this with understanding and patience. Ask leading questions, make sure you speak the same language and very soon he will learn to conduct such conversations as easily as you.

Of course, all women are different, but most of us are excellent organizers, multi-taskers. And now a partner is next to our hero, who all the time talks about plans for the day, what should be done and how. But he wants to see how you let go of this control, how spontaneous, playful you are next to him. Both of you probably like it when you manage to talk well, understand the point of view of the other, confirm your feelings. It strengthens you individually and your relationship as a whole. His love will only deepen if you suddenly take an interest in him without a schedule and control; then he feels like a real person that you see and hear, and not just an item on your schedule.

1. He wants you to know: boys cry too!

Deep down, just like you, men are vulnerable creatures. Do not punish him and minimize criticism if you notice even a hint of sadness. Let him be alone. Whether he will cry or not (after all, men are taught to cry less), however, it is very important that his negative emotions are identified, heard and recognized. Our culture so shames men for their vulnerability that they have no other way to vent their feelings except through anger. Offer him the very place where he could fully open up and where he would not be judged. You do not need to "dissuade" him from his fears and anxieties, but offer him your compassion and understanding - these two qualities he so lacked in childhood and in adulthood.

If you suddenly find yourself unable to accept what he says, pause, take a couple of deep breaths and remember these five points.

As an epigraph to the topic of male tastes, I will quote the words of Ninon Lanclos, a French courtesan who lived in the seventeenth century:

“The most flattering confessions are not those that are made intentionally, but those that break out against the will ...”.

By and large, men think of us all the same, and their views of us have not changed since high school. Sad but true.

If we take as a basis the popular saying that there is no arguing about tastes, then in food, in fashion and in women, every man is looking for his own relish, it is the most pleasant for him.

Serve someone spicy, extravagant and slender, someone sweeter, cozy and soft.

It is easy to learn about the culinary preferences of the chosen one, it is enough to invite him to try a new dish. In a minute, or he himself will tell you - “Oh! It was divine! ”, Or the dish will fly into his head under your insulted cry - “So I don’t know how to cook? Come on, do it again!”

With fashion, things are more complicated, but, by and large, they do not create problems. If a man is guided by the rule to buy only what he is used to wearing, then under the strict guidance of a wise woman, he will change both his taste and image.

But most of all we are concerned about the tastes of men in relation to women. Sometimes the arguments of the stronger sex are contradictory, which confuses us and introduces some confusion. With an air of connoisseurs, they claim that they adore thin women, are crazy about blondes and prefer smart business ladies.

Women who believe in this rubbish get hooked and remain “in flight”, as inconsistent men selflessly begin to frame plump “buns” at all, they don’t pay attention to the “suit” at all, and fall into a trance from long-legged and brainless “chickens” .

To be honest, we ourselves often mislead them by the discrepancy between our outer shell and inner content. And men are bad physiognomists and, sadly, we have to admit: they think of us not at all what we are. Here you can't help but sigh - it's a pity that we can't be offered to them as a menu. Rather, they would not mind, but we do not agree.

So, if men look out for women in the crowd that they like and bypass those that they don’t like, then our task is either to prove to the stronger sex that he has bad taste, or to convince a single instance that you are his dream. life. And you need to do this literally in the first minutes, because during this time the first impression is created, and then at least get out of your skin - you won’t convince the stubborn, if you have the figure of a fashion model and the smile of a May rose.

By the way, men are easier to get acquainted with those whose appearance inspires confidence in them, and shy away from super-beauties, afraid to get hit on the nose. Not all, of course, but the vast majority, and this is encouraging.

My personal observations are based on male confessions made against their will (this is where the observation courtesan Ninon came in handy). Each man has his own search system, but sometimes there are failures and some corrections in it. It is not difficult to master it, it is enough to catch the meaning of "rejection" of this or that lady. Think about whether for this reason you were once rejected.

- She is all so unhappy, she has eternal depression and a lot of complexes. A strange craving for sorting out relationships and for sentimental dialogues. She is just a bore, next to which you want to hang yourself or strangle her.

– She is perfection itself, but for her fashion is the meaning of life. All talk is only about rags and about herself. He looks condescendingly at men, and considers himself the center of the universe. Getting along with someone like that is like signing your own death warrant for a jealous murder.

- She's definitely crazy! Still dreams of a prince on a white horse. He always compares men with mystical heroes and demands to match the image. She has the look of a doomed Juliet or a Sleeping Beauty who must be awakened by someone with a kiss. Longing is green, not a woman ...

- She is full of ambition, always right in everything, does not tolerate refusal, and will stand her ground to the last. Pinochet in a skirt, from which any normal man "fades" in a day.

- She is her own in the board, it is impossible to take her for a woman. Go to bed with her?! Yeah, that never crossed my mind! But to call for a hike or for football - no problem.

Such or approximately such opinions develop in men after a brief intercourse. They, the poor fellows, are unaware that our ambitions, romance and manifestation of weakness are just masks that we put on ourselves with one goal - to please. We did not take into account something, so the result turned out to be zero. After all, as we reasoned: a man wants to show strength, wants to see a purposeful nature in me, so you need to correspond to the “ideal”.

Why did the misfire come out?

A wise woman knows how difficult it is to constantly wear a mask, risking showing her real face. Men then say about such pretenders - "he married a houri, but it turned out to be a fury."

Conclusion: to adapt to his taste is stupid, it is better to find a connoisseur of your charms or “make adjustments” to the tastes of the “object” that you liked. To do this, you need to understand: men are not perverts, just some people like watermelons, others like pork cartilage, but with what “seasoning” they “eat” it depends on us.

So, what kind of "seasoning" do they like ...

- She is natural both in a dressing gown and in a chic dress, she does not pretend to be touchy, but she does not flirt unnecessarily. With her, I can be myself and it's great.

- She is unpredictable, her cute whims are confusing. Remember, as in O. Henry: the young wife wanted a peach, and her husband, risking his life, brought her the cherished fruit. What did this cutie say? “Did I ask for a peach? I wanted an orange ... ”This always keeps a man in good shape, the main thing is that the girlfriend does not go too far.

- She is a dreamer, there are rumors around her, vanity, and it turns me on. With her, a dull reality turns into a holiday. She knows how to smooth sharp corners and never rolls scenes.

- She is compliant, but not in the sense that she always agrees with me on everything. She knows how to resolve issues without prejudice to my interests. With her, I am confident in myself, my wings grow.

She is cheerful and brave, I have never seen her in a bad mood. How does she wear short skirts? How witty talks about "non-female" problems. A sharp mind and seeming accessibility is an exciting combination.

Here you will listen and spread your arms: what did we offer you, men? The same dreamer, the same bold and moderately capricious ... it is clear that we have different ideas about such concepts. The most annoying thing is that sometimes there is no second chance, and the man who rejected us is unlikely to appreciate our efforts a second time. So, hitting him on the spot with the first shot is your main task. And then what?

Drag him to you and turn your head completely, until your dear friend comes to his senses! Just kidding, dear ladies, this number also does not work with all men, but more on that another time, but for now, for the sake of mood, a playful scientific guide on the differences between male and female perceptions.

"God created a man, and then decided that he was capable of more, and created a woman." (Adela St. John)

“A woman is a man who has not developed to the state intended for him.” (Thomas Aquinas)

“A chicken is not a bird, a woman is not a person” (folk wisdom).

Ask any man what he thinks about a woman, and you will certainly hear a phrase that has long been set on edge - "all women are fools." Women also did not remain in debt, arguing - "all men are bastards."

And yet we aspire to each other, like oppositely charged particles. There is one consolation: science has proven that we live longer, adapt more easily in extreme situations, and most importantly, under nervous stress, we have every right to become hysterical.

There are still a lot of differences that, in essence, do not matter, but are indicative in themselves:

1 Women think concretely, their speech is emotional, gesticulation is well developed.

2 Vocabulary is so rich that a woman pronounces 5-7 thousand words more per day than a man.

3 A woman is more practical than any man and always knows exactly what food to buy, where the hammer and nails went, and where her husband left his slippers.

4 After sex, she will never ask a stupid question with the air of a smug giant - "Honey, were you okay?" She will say something else - "I felt SO good ...".

5 In the bathroom and on the dressing table, any lady has a huge number of essential items that she regularly uses.

6 Women love cats, flowers, romance, gossip and... men.

Men have a very limited vocabulary, but the stock of obscene expressions with which they convey their emotional state is regularly replenished. They are called the stronger sex only because of their physical superiority, but the pain threshold in men is much lower. Orientation on the ground is generally a weak side of any man - they are even able to “get lost” in their own apartment. As for sex, there is an eternal struggle between the desire of a man and his capabilities - they, perhaps, would like to, but ... it does not always work out. Here, dear ladies, we have the opportunity to show wisdom and understanding. In a wise woman, even a man who is not very strong in this sense turns into a sexual giant.

After sex, a man immediately falls asleep, which is also not surprising - he gets tired much faster. Men like to play sports while sitting in a chair in front of the TV, make plans for the future while lying on the couch, and relieve stress with a drink. They like expensive cars, fresh newspapers and shirts, hot meals and ... women who will present it all to them on a silver platter.

However, dear ladies, it would not be fair, when discussing the shortcomings of men, not to give them the opportunity to be rehabilitated in our eyes. In the end, they also have claims against us based on “deadly” facts, and they also want to live with us in love and harmony.

As the French say, you need to know the enemy by sight, so let's let one of the representatives of the stronger sex express the claims that men have accumulated against women. For each justified accusation, dear ladies, you will, alas, have to deduct 10 points from your piggy bank.

Well, if you have already wisely taken into account this shortcoming and successfully corrected it, feel free to add 20 points for diligence.

So, word to the man.

... There is no such man who would not want to fully comprehend all women's secrets. Someone succeeds, although there are no absolutely successful men in the world. I address my revelations to men, although I have no doubt that women will also be curious to know something about themselves. I will try to remain loyal, although, God knows, it is difficult to admit my mistakes, so it will be fair if everyone gets "nuts".

Man, even if you are irresistible and the women follow you in a herd - do not flatter yourself, you still do not understand anything about women.

Woman, even if all the men of the world bow before your mind - do not turn up your nose, they still consider you a "stupid woman."

Our worst mistake is generalization.

For example, if a husband makes a mistake, then men will say about him - “what a fool this Mr. N.!” The wife will pass a sentence on him, in which all her natural essence is hidden - “What else can you expect from a man ?!”

As soon as a wife stumbles, a sacramental phrase is ready for her husband - “All women are fools!”

We like to generalize - this is the reason for our frustrations. We do not want to take into account either the natural essence of each other, or the virtues of the stronger and weaker sex separately. If your husband champs at the table, this does not mean that all men are pigs. If my wife is obsessed with rags, can I blame all women for this?

Yes, I confess, we sincerely believe that there are sins in the world that are allowed only to peasants. Adultery is one of them. Let's talk sensibly: there are much more women on earth than us, of course, "each creature in pairs" does not work. Nature itself came up with a way out of the situation and suggested it to a man, but I do not justify those “brothers” who encroach on “their friend’s wife” when there are a lot of lonely women around.

Women do not approve of such reasonableness, but they do not offer any other way out. They themselves periodically cheat on their husbands, but I don’t see any logic in their act: you have a couple, so why risk your well-being? It turns out that they do not want to lag behind us and generalize - if you can, then we can too! In that case, let us do what you consider to be purely female privileges: gossip, flirt, etc.

It makes no sense to complain about women in general, I realized this recently and I am ready to prove my case to you, but on the condition that you draw the appropriate conclusions.

Who do you think is a good wife? The one who takes care of her husband, creates comfort, loves him no matter what ... But no!

If a woman understands what the man she loves needs, she will be a good wife to him, even if she doesn’t know how to cook and absolutely doesn’t understand his hobby.

However, women stubbornly rely on the first, and do not take into account the second. For centuries, they themselves have been erecting a “good husband” of henpecked and sissy boys on a pedestal, while they themselves dream of tough men.

Another paradox: just as love is glorified in all works, beauties are praised to the skies in all films and fashion magazines.

Almost all women are convinced that men prefer top models, and they completely forget to ask us - who do we really like?

Personally, I prefer to admire a chic thing in a museum, but for everyday use I prefer an ordinary woman without any “bells and whistles” there. The vast majority of men agree with me, because on the scale of attractiveness, in the first place for us is not beauty, but character and other spiritual qualities. As Marcel Proust said, "Let us leave beautiful women to men without imagination."

Another observation of mine concerns female logic. Science has long proven that men and women think the same way, only we reason, and they worry. Women rely on feelings in everything, and more often we are mistaken, and they manage to solve global issues with the help of one intuition. But only women know how to impose their opinion on their husbands with the most innocent look. I'll tell you a secret that there is no such man who would miss the chance to win back by putting the "woman" in a bad light, only because of a sense of contradiction.

By the way, because of the difference in views, many contradictions arise: it is absolutely useless to prove to your wife that the World Cup happens every four years, and going to the market once a week.

I also argue that women are much more efficient than us. Not a single man will wipe the dust under the sofa - it still appears there with enviable speed and is not visible (logically?)

What will the woman say to that? Yes, it is not visible, but I I know that she is there! And the fun called “general cleaning” begins, in which all family members are involved! Half a day the corners are licked, and by the evening the wife serves dead next to you. Is cleanliness in the apartment really more precious to her than going to the cinema with her husband or a romantic evening together?

No man will ever trade hockey for a mop and a rag. Moreover, it will not elevate sterile cleanliness to the category of things of paramount importance.

The same is with debts: a man can remember them, but not spoil his life because of an annoying trifle; a woman will not sleep peacefully until she repays the debt at the appointed time. Such diligence (or conscientiousness?) will never be understood by peasants.

All women consider us men to be complete cretins in the field of fashion, and this is another contradiction between the female and male sex.

A husband, going to drink beer with a friend in a bar, will never puzzle over his appearance - he will dress according to where he is going, and will do it in a minute.

What does a wife do in such a situation? It depends on many factors: mood, desire to strike a friend, hear flattering words.

Tell me, is it practical to choose the appropriate shoes and handbag for each dress? Buying an expensive thing just to rub your neighbor's nose (and then this thing will gather dust in the closet, because "it doesn't match the color")? And constant experiments with spirits? As soon as you get used to the smell of the woman you love, you are confused by a new fragrance.

No offense will be said, but I consider talk of female practicality an exaggeration. Whether business - men: two suits, pair of shirts, yes a tie. One cologne, like a true friend - for life.

Speaking of order... What I consider neat, my wife calls chaos and bedlam. Probably, not only in our family there is such a contradiction, because I conducted a survey among men and concluded: not a single normal man is able to unravel the woman's desire for eternal rearrangement of furniture, rearrangement of clothes in the closet. If I know where I have this or that thing, then is there a need to restore additional order? After the wife "brings beauty" in the kitchen or in the wardrobe, for some time only she can easily navigate in space. I spend a lot of time and nerves, but if you turn to your wife for help, you will immediately hear in response - you can’t find anything without me! Pure mockery, by God!

For a long time I want to conduct an experiment: arrange her cosmetics according to my male taste and see how she copes. I do not recommend this experience for the faint-hearted husbands.

There is another observation, I don’t know whether to talk about it or is it better to remain silent? Okay, since I decided to state my revelations, I will be consistent to the end.

Guys, when promising something to the lady of your heart, watch your words, because all women, without exception, treat feelings as real objects. Don't believe? Then tell your sweetheart: “I will love you forever, I will carry you in my arms, I will give you the moon from the sky!”.

Oh man, that's where you screwed up. You are in a rush current they promised her mountains of feelings, and in a year or ten years she would remember these words. It is clear to the fool that you described a beautiful symbol (lyrics, in one word), and there is no deception, but ... A woman is a creature capable of drawing any conclusion convenient for herself from non-existent facts. Verified by life experience.

By the way, women have the opposite idea about their own promises: today she gave her word, tomorrow she changed her mind and took it away.

I risk offending women again. You, dear ladies, claim that you feel beauty better than we do and you have amazing taste. In fact, you prefer everything bright, spectacular, catchy.

Alas, I want to present you with another contradiction - we, men, feel beauty differently and understand it in our own way. It is pointless to argue on this issue, it is impossible to convince women, so I will add one thing: yes, you have no equal in interior design, in creating comfort, but only men know a lot about real female beauty.

Comparisons can be continued indefinitely: raising children, attitude to work, friendship ... But why go into details, everything is already clear - we are different, hence the problems in families.

The husband accuses his wife of talkativeness, and she lacks communication. So take a break from the newspaper for half an hour, listen to it, because you don’t have to answer, the main thing is to nod your head and insert words. And no scandals, peace and quiet in the house.

The same is true in other matters: to take into account the contradictions, the difference between us, to make an effort on ourselves, not to treat everyone with the same brush. Indeed, as one wise man said - "A woman is for a man, that a sail is for a sailboat - you cannot sail without it."

And an anecdote for the road ...

“Here in our family, all the minor issues are decided by the wife - where to go on vacation, what clothes to buy, who to invite to the anniversary. But I have the last word in the most important matters. What? Well, for example: is there a God in the world?

You can reach sky-high heights, overcome your complexes, and set yourself up for the best, but we are not able to cross female and male logic into a plus sign. The parallels don't cross! So a man and a woman, even put them in the same bed, will remain a mystery to each other.

It seems that it could be simpler - I took a textbook on psychology, and learned about the opposite field all the "underground", studied the "object" up and down in order to see it through. Dudki!

We prefer to hope that HE will start thinking like a woman, and he stubbornly waits for SHE to start thinking like a man.

I would like to see what comes out of it.

Of course, a lot of smart and useful things are written in books, but how to put these tips into practice, how, for example, to find out: what is on the mind of that sweetheart over there at the next table ... or this big guy who has been staring at me for a good half an hour? In life, alas, there are stories when two people wholeheartedly strived for understanding, but stumbled over this very “logical parallel” ...

Irina (a real beauty, I must say), fell head over heels in love with Vadim, and he, of course, reciprocated her feelings. But both of them didn’t know a damn thing about psychology, so their romance almost ended at the very beginning.

The fact is that Vadim really wanted to brag to his friends about an awesomely beautiful girl, so all their dates turned into noisy parties. And Irina dreamed of being alone with her sweetheart, enjoying kisses and all that ... She already hinted to her beloved, and she took movie tickets to the last row, and invited Vadim to her dacha ... but the man turned out to be slow-witted. One word - oak!

In the end, the girl was tired of the eternal presence of cheerful friends, and she stopped answering the phone. Vadim, of course, did not understand such a sharp transition from love to disfavor and demanded an explanation. As a result, he had to explain himself ... This story had a "happy ending", although the couple patted each other's nerves fairly.

Svetlana and Igor were introduced by a friend, at first sight Svetochka liked the man. She was a woman, not that old, but not the first freshness, so she immediately decided to "take the bull by the horns." She reasoned something like this: Igor showed interest in me, took the phone, called me on a date. This means that he is not indifferent to me, and there is nothing to “pull rubber” if the matter ends in sex anyway ... I’ll break down for two days, and then I’ll stay with him for the night, you see, and I’ll take root forever.

At first, everything went like clockwork: on the third day, Igor invited Sveta to his place. And then the woman behaved somehow wrong. Rather, she behaved correctly from the point of view of female logic, but from the position of male ..

The scenario was as follows: “tea-coffee, let's dance” with breaks for kisses, then Sveta looked at her watch and started getting ready to go home. Not very fast, by the way, to give the sweetheart time to figure out: they say, she doesn’t want to leave, but it’s somehow indecent to stay herself, now, if Igor had taken the initiative ...

Igor, expecting that Sveta would stay, began to give weighty arguments: it was already late, it was dark, it was raining and stuff like that.

It seemed unreasonable for Sveta to give in because of some kind of rain, and promises like “I’ll make a bed for you in the hall”, “I swear I won’t touch you” didn’t tempt her either. She waited for other words, but either the man was afraid to speak openly about his intentions, or he didn’t lay claim to her body either in sleep or in spirit, Sveta did not hear these words.

Final - she walked home alone, using unprintable epithets to the gentleman. And the gentleman was in full confidence that the woman did not like him, otherwise she would certainly have stayed, perhaps even forever ...

Alas, the two parallels did not intersect.

Natalya and Sergey had a similar situation, only this woman still stayed overnight with a hospitable host. No one scared her with rain, however, it didn’t come to that: the familiar scenario “tea-coffee ...” smoothly passed into the bed stage. But the final chord, according to male understanding, was strange. And it was like this...

Early in the morning Natalya woke up and quietly disappeared "in the blue fog." It seemed to her that a mysterious disappearance (well, just like in her favorite movie) was extremely romantic. If a woman knew what a cruel joke male logic would play with her!

According to the scenario that the woman “foresaw”, the beloved had to rush in search of her, not having the strength to live without her.

Sergei woke up in the morning, felt for an empty pillow and became numb. There was no friend nearby, as well as a note from her or any other sign of her being here that night. Well, if only there was a trace of lipstick on the mirror, if only she forgot her panties - nothing! The man was upset to the depths of his soul, and logic led him to a dead end, or rather, to the conclusion that the woman did not like him, disappointed her, so she sneaked away secretly. Sergei decided to forget about her. And then they met… a year later, when it was too late. That's when everything turned out, much to the regret of both.

These are the stories that could be the beginning of a great and long love.

Male and female parallels are somewhat reminiscent of rails that converge somewhere beyond the horizon. But after all, the rails are firmly connected by sleepers and turn into a road along which trains go in different directions. And what are we building? Here is a riddle that can only be answered by two people.

Now let's spend time with benefit and replenish the treasury of wisdom.

So, roughly imagining two parallels (his and yours), find the "stone of mutual NOT understanding" and remove it from the road that was supposed to lead the spouses to happiness. And here are everyday situations in which every woman has found herself more than once ...

Scene one. The wife, tired during the day, washes the linen, - “Well, why is there so much of it every time!” She sighs heavily, wiping her sweaty forehead.

The clock strikes six times, the husband returns from work. He looks pleased, he hides something behind his back, - "Honey, I have a surprise ..."

“I don’t care for surprises! Dinner is not yet ready, and I’m already falling down,” the wife takes a breath. The husband does not notice the thunderclouds that have gathered over his wife’s head in the form of steam, and smiles meaningfully, “You’ve been unhappy lately that we don’t go anywhere…”

“What should I be happy about? - the wife interrupts his monologue, and begins to furiously rub the linen, - I am sitting, like a fool, within four walls! I have not even put on a new dress for the third year in a row. Nowhere!”

- "Well, today there is a reason" - the husband holds out his hand, in which little blue tickets are clamped.

- "What is it?" - the wife throws a disgruntled look over her shoulder, but does not stop washing.

“Get ready, we’re going to the theatre! I stood in line for an hour!!! - the husband’s voice is solemn, he is waiting for praise.

- “Just think, a feat ... Sometimes I’m idle in the store for half a day, and nothing, I’m alive,” the wife contemptuously curls her lips, from the whole phrase she caught only one familiar word “queue”. The word "theater" was lost somewhere in my memory.

“Honey, we don’t have much time,” the husband humbly suffers offense, still hoping to wait for gratitude.

“I'm not going anywhere! I have laundry,” the wife stubbornly tightens her lips.

- “But you only complained yesterday ...” - the husband is confused, he is trying to understand his mistake.

“That was yesterday, and today I have things to do,” something clicks and jams in my wife’s head, “Are you kidding me? Still shaking these tickets ... "

- “I don’t understand you,” the husband throws up his hands and goes to the balcony to smoke. Tickets lie forlornly on a table in the hallway, linen dries in the bathroom.

Question: where is the "pitfall" that has become a stumbling block? And did you have a similar scene at home? If your husband also went to the balcony to “calm his nerves”, this time your piggy bank was not replenished with wisdom.

Scene two. In a department store, a husband and wife walk through the women's section. A man holds a companion under his elbow, sticking out his tummy with a proud look, - “Well, dear, choose!” - his hand majestically describes a circle.

“Ah, my eyes are running wide!” - a woman, holding her breath, walks between the rows of dresses.

“Maybe this one?” The husband points to something in pink frills.

“Fu, well, you have taste ... - the wife wrinkles her nose, and then thinks, - Or maybe not a dress ... maybe - a raincoat? After all, autumn is coming soon. Her practicality touches a man, he is kind and almost cheerful.

“Okay, let's buy a raincoat,” the man approaches the problem simply: he came, he saw, he bought. He does not understand the doubts of his wife, but he dutifully heads to another department.

“No, I changed my mind,” his wife grabs him by the elbow, “My coat is not old yet, but for the New Year I would need a new dress.”

She doesn’t care that it’s five months before the New Year, but her husband is patient this time too, “Look, what a lovely dress, and the color under your eyes,” the man sighs with relief, naively believing that the choice has been made.

“What are you, Ninka from the seventh apartment is exactly the same! - the wife twists her finger at her temple, - I'd rather take this, red.

The husband, anticipating the agony of choice, offers to buy both dresses, he agrees to everything, just to leave as soon as possible.

“Why do I need two dresses? - the wife goggles her eyes, - You only spend money! After all, I don’t have a handbag or shoes suitable for them ... ”In the woman’s head, something clicks and turns on, but the husband, anticipating such an outcome, feverishly calculates losses.

“Honey, do you want a fur coat? Winter is coming…” – he hopes that a fur coat will cost less than two dresses.

“A fur coat ... - the woman thinks, - I have a sheepskin coat!”

“It’s a pity,” the husband sighs and offers, “Pussy, maybe you first think what you need, and then we will buy THIS?” - a week ago he warned his wife that he would receive a bonus and take her to a department store. Bad words were ready to break from her lips, but the woman suddenly boils.

“I can’t decide what I need more, and you climb arm in arm with stupid advice!” Her head turns to the lingerie department, her eyes light up.

“Oh, no!” the husband groans, and the wife takes out a handkerchief from her purse and begins to cry, saying - what a bad husband she has, he brought her here, promised to buy a dress, and made her guilty ...

The day was ruined, the wife was left without renewal, and the husband, going to the balcony to smoke, firmly decided - that's it, no bonuses! I’d rather drink with friends ... every penny ...

So, the second story is told… Did you recognize yourself?

If at least in some way you resemble the heroine, forget about the cherished points.

If the heroine's husband reminded you of your own husband (not the former, but the present), add 10 points to the piggy bank for the fact that he still hasn't run away from you.

If you prefer to go to the store with a friend or alone - 20 points to you for wisdom.

By the way, at the very beginning we talked about delusions, and that a wise woman is not afraid to admit she is wrong. However, I would like to look at that daredevil who dares to point out to a woman her mistakes. After all, even in the definition of error, we - men and women - are so different from each other.

Men always want to get to the bottom of the truth, and we prefer to live in a mysterious world of illusions. From time to time, any woman resorts to the trick of self-deception in order to protect herself from annoying experiences over trifles. I will add that only smart women masterfully master the technique of this trick, but it is not difficult to master them, the main thing is to learn the limits of what is permitted.

For example, if a woman claims that this fashionable reddish shade of hair is natural, then it is better for a man not to risk reminding her: “Honey, you were a brunette last month, and also assured that this is your natural color!” At best, they will not “hear” him, at worst, they will remember a jar with dubious content, which the husband hides in the refrigerator. Everyone will know what this “panacea” smells like, and that some people smear it on their bald head, including neighbors, relatives, friends ... Oh, do not give out your little secret? You remembered that the color of molten gold is my native color. Who doubted...

There are things about which you cannot argue with women. Any lady should know the list of these things dear to the heart: this includes appearance, figure, health, household skills, hobbies and friends.

Let's pretend that I am a man who has allowed himself to be invaded by your illusory world of relative truth. As a wise woman, try to "click" me on the nose, without humiliating my dignity. In the end, neither I nor you need a scandal ...

Me: “Darling, don’t you think you’ve gained a little weight? I gave you these trousers just a month ago, and now you can’t fit into them ... "

You - "!..?!".

I'm like, "Well, face it, honey, step on the scale and make sure I'm right."

You - "!!..??"

Yes, there are really extra 5 kg on the scales, you yourself knew about it. But it's one thing to know, it's another thing to be disillusioned in such a crude way.

So, which of you answered about the trousers - “Oh, they sat down after washing!” - Receive 20 wisdom points as a reward.

Who innocently chirped about the scales - “These scales never showed correctly! And you, hubby, are just a bore who can’t tell his wife anything but nasty things. I’m not ringing at all corners that you are wearing a special belt for sciatica!” Variations can be different, the main thing is that the essence is preserved, for which replenish the piggy bank with 10 points.

By the way, men often “peck” at female self-deception, taking their words or deeds seriously.

For example, you woke up in the morning in a bad mood, looked at yourself in the mirror and admitted - “Yes, it’s time to go on a diet ... and it wouldn’t hurt to do some exercises ... Everything has been decided! I'm starting on Monday!

Hubby is right there, "inserts his five cents", that "it's about time." Well, isn't he an idiot after that? If I criticize myself, it does not mean that I really think so. And the words about Monday are the same self-deception as thoughts about being overweight, because I say something completely different to everyone around me: I have an amazing figure and excellent health.

Try to poke my pride with malicious jokes, and I will quickly put you in your place with sincere bewilderment: “When should I do exercises? I don’t have time to eat properly!”

And it is absolutely unthinkable to make a remark to a woman about her makeup, because in this matter any of us considers ourselves a professional and will immediately object: “I never abuse makeup! I have naturally good skin."

And in general, any self-respecting woman should use the words “always” and “never” more often - in them lies the meaning of self-deception. By this we are trying to emphasize our exclusivity. And men think differently: if never, then never, if always, then constantly.

They do not suspect how many nuances these expressions have, they want to put the poor woman before a fact, deprive her of illusion, and poke her in the face with the cruel truth! Will men really feel better if we hear this from them? If my husband daily deprived me of illusions, in a month I would turn into a vixen. So, it is in their own interests that wives in self-deception find satisfaction from their unfulfilled hopes and desires. Someone will say that it is harmful to live in illusions, that this is the lot of weak, not wise women.

Well, let me give you one example. Two women were abandoned by men, only one looked at things realistically, and the other indulged in self-deception. The first one cried to everyone: “Ah, he left me, I feel so bad!” And it was true.

The second “deceived” her consciousness, repeating to everyone and to herself - “I left him! He doesn't deserve such a woman!" And it was self-deception that healed her soul.

There is, of course, negative self-deception, it is precisely this that goes beyond what is permitted, because it does not bring us anything good. How often do we succumb to harmful illusions, taking them at face value.

For example, many are sure that after the wedding they will be able to re-educate a drunkard, that after the birth of a child, the husband will stop spree.

In marriage, many ladies are also cunning, slipping a different kind of self-deception: “I have never been jealous of my husband, he has not given me a reason!”, “I have never had the thought of cheating on my husband!”

Those who have a lover are deceived like this: “He will never leave me!”, “He will leave his wife and marry me.”

How many of you are subject to such self-deception? Alas, subtract one point from the treasury of wisdom for each harmful self-deception.

And now, those of you who have posted more than 10 points from the piggy bank, add yourself 20 - for honesty.

Even in the circle of their own kind, women do not leave the habit of deceit: “I never gossip!”, “I come to work on time and I am not late.”

In such behavior there is no self-interest, there is no resentment for others, it is innocent, in fact, and does not mislead anyone (except perhaps the woman herself).

Why anger a lady, object to her, if a woman wants to temporarily escape from a reality that does not suit her in order to become happy?

How to teach men to indulge our self-deception, how to explain that without illusions we will wither, that it is much more pleasant for us to hear from them - “yes, honey, you look wonderful in this dress!” Than to listen to hints about being overweight.

And we are more sophisticated in small dirty tricks, we can notice such male flaws, so caustically and, most importantly, “put in a hairpin” in time ...

But we are wise women, so we will not resort to cheap tricks. We will not "put a spoke in the wheel" of our sisters - let them be cunning if it does not harm others.

“Yes, Svetochka, you are not like your mother in character: she is a tyrant, and you are an angel.”

“Of course, Mar-Vanna, you have impeccable taste.”

Yes, you never grumble, you don't believe in horoscopes, you don't need glasses. And in general, no one today even noticed that you did not wash your hair.

You are beautiful and sweet, as always, everything will be as you want, if only you were happy, dear ... That's what I want to hear from my husband, trying to pull tight trousers over my swollen hips.

It's no secret that we, seemingly smart and successful women, often cannot find a common language with the male half of humanity. Why? Because they are Martians, and we are normal people. Don't smile, it's true!

And how can we communicate?

Imagine that you have arrived on an exotic island where no one speaks Russian. What does a normal person, that is, a wise woman, do? That's right, before the road, he stocks up with a dictionary, which contains accessible recommendations for communicating with the local population. This is the ideal situation. What is really happening? You, as an honest person, are trying to explain yourself with the help of this very dictionary, and they look at you like you are crazy! You urgently turn to another native, with a phrase that should definitely express friendliness, and he, for no reason, starts shouting at you and in general, his behavior becomes clearly aggressive. You start looking through the dictionary to keep yourself from fizzling out this time, and you try to ask for help, and they laugh in your face, and in general, they walk away. What's the matter?

Thinking logically, you come to the conclusion that you were deceived, and this dictionary is not what you need, because people clearly do not understand what you want from them.

The same thing happens in our interactions with men. We try to speak with them in the language that we think they should understand, but everything turns out the other way around. They are like those natives - either angry or laughing at us.

In this chapter, I have jotted down short instructions on how to treat men so that they understand us, to the best of their ability, of course.

So, how to communicate with men so that they understand us.

Secret one. The easiest way to talk to a man is when he imagines the specific purpose of the conversation.

"Just" chatter does not interest him. It is possible to fray with a girlfriend - this is what your man thinks. So when he looks up from the newspaper (football, news programme, car atlas), he wants to KNOW EXACTLY what you want from him.

What is our mistake? We don’t know how to specifically define the purpose of the conversation, and we ask: “Where does the money go?”, Or we say “Let's discuss our relationship”, or we say “Tell me what to do with my work.”

Such a lack of specifics frightens our gentle men, and instead of directing their convolutions to solve our problem, they begin to wag and look for ways to get away from the conversation. They think: “Well, why discuss these relationships - there is, and thank God!”, And talking about money generally drives them into a trance. Now, if instead of asking rhetorical questions, you suggested: “Darling, let's discuss our expenses for the next week!”, Your man would instantly give you an estimate of upcoming expenses with a clear justification for each item, including the positions “beer” and “magazine "Bear".

Why is this happening? It's all about the difference between the male and female approach to the same things. When you meet with a girlfriend, you can safely offer her: “Chat!”, and neither of you cares about what exactly. The PROCESS is important to you. And your man needs a specific goal, otherwise he simply will not communicate with you.

What does a man do when he is pestered with such "vague" conversations?

You can get rude if you persist

He may simply not want to talk to you, and bury his head in the newspaper, muttering: “Leave me alone!”

You can be distracted from the conversation (take away, confuse your head, kiss until you faint), just to not discuss anything.

If your man doesn’t know you well, he can simply decide that you don’t know how to think specifically, and from here it’s not far to the “stupid chicken”

What to do?

1. having decided to have a conversation with a man, present him with an “agenda” - let him know what exactly will be discussed

2. Ask him specific questions if you want specific answers. For example, to the question “Well, how is it at work?” You will receive a concise "Normal". But if you ask "How was your new project?" it is quite possible that you will hear the details.

3. Forget hints! Men don't get it! If you want to say something, say it in words, and leave the Aesopian language for more highly organized personalities. I'll tell you a secret, men perfectly understand our hints, but they prefer not to respond to them, because they are afraid that we will manipulate them. So, dear ladies, we have no choice but to be frank and direct in expressing our desires. And instead of repeating a hundred times: “Oh, what a nice little fur coat on Irochka, the secretary of our director!”, We just murmur affectionately: “Darling, I really want a new thing for winter! I just saw a very pretty coat in a boutique at such and such an address, article such and such. Believe me, this way to communicate your desires is much more effective!

Second secret. Men can't think out loud.

They are creatures that are afraid to seem weak and insecure. They try to hide all their doubts and fears from us, and only the result of their reflections is revealed to the surface. They call it "thinking."

This is how your darling will be silent, silent, and will issue a solution to the issue that you have already forgotten to think about, and all this time he silently solved the problem that you loaded into him. Remember - men are result oriented.

While the man is not sure of the correctness of the decision, he will not say a word to you - that the Bryansk partisan is being interrogated by the Gestapo. Therefore, do not be surprised to hear in response to an easy (in your opinion, naturally) question, not an instant answer, but the words "We need to think."

Where is our mistake? 1.WE LOVE TO THINK OUT. And men hate it when we start dumping all our ideas and options for solving this or that problem on their heads. And this again rests on our main difference with men - they are oriented to the decision and we - per process.

In truth, we are not going to share our thoughts at all - it’s just that it’s easier for us to think about the problem itself and find a solution. And what does your husband do at this time? The same as thousands of men in his position - thinks about his own. And then the logical conclusion - "women talk too much!". And literally, this means the following - we give them more information than they would like to hear from us.

What to do? 1. try to explain to your man what "thinking out loud" means for you. Tell him that you understand him too. I did so. And now, instead of grimacing during my reasoning, my husband is actively involved in the discussion of the problem. I must admit, it became easier for us to communicate when we came to an understanding on this issue.

2. do not demand from your husband that he immediately and immediately give you an answer to all your questions. Make allowance for the fact that most men are slow-witted (including yours). Let him think things over calmly and without haste - it will be much more convenient for him.

Secret third. Men don't like to express their feelings out loud. They just panic when they have to answer the question of what is happening to them. Well, they do not know how to voice their emotions! Forgive them this weakness.

The vast majority of men prefer the simple and understandable language of the mind, not feelings. It is clearer to them (remember the exotic country with an unfamiliar language?). in the emotional sphere, men are complete ignoramuses. Alas, but it is.

Where is our mistake? We do not discount men for their emotional cretinism, and instead of trying to understand them, we accuse them of insensitivity and coldness. In fact, your "bunny" can be a real volcano, just all of its fire is hidden under a layer of solidified lava. By the way, in some matters they are much more sensitive and vulnerable than we can imagine.

Don't ask your man "how do you feel?". He doesn't really know himself. And from the inability to explain, she falls into extremely conflicting emotions - anger and rage.

In addition, men cannot determine their emotional state as quickly as we women do. They slow down, in a word.

And even the most intelligent subject may well turn out to be an emotional nerd. So - the smarter this or that representative of the Martian tribe seems to you, the more reason you have to doubt his emotionality. Most likely, under the guise of a “great smart guy,” he hides a lot of complexes and fears about his own sphere of feelings. And not every lady can “wake up” this volcano.

Yes, we are so different, and yet, we love each other ...

What can you advise a wise woman? I think that love, loyalty and devotion will help you find the only true path to the heart of your chosen one. And you will finally speak the same language with him - the language of love and joy. It is understandable to everyone.

As for the difference in the perception of events, here the knowledge of male nature will allow women to avoid many metamorphoses.

The epigraph to this topic can be put in the words of the French writer Colet: “Men are surprisingly illogical - they repeat that all women are the same, but constantly change one for another”

So, a banal situation: you met and exchanged phone numbers. Start…

A woman has been sitting on the phone since morning, waiting for a call… On the third day, she was already driven to the extreme, having come up with and managed to survive all conceivable and unthinkable scenarios.

A man, on the other hand, does not attach any importance to the first call, does not change his usual routine, and, dialing a number in ten days, does not make any plans for the near future at all. Well, maybe for this evening.

And now, a historic meeting has been appointed ... A woman enthusiastically tells her friends how extraordinary HE is, every minute she glances in the mirror, straightens a new hairstyle, buys breathtaking underwear, with a clear conscience dumping crazy money for him. She would have bought a wedding dress, but she has not yet decided - with ruffles and frills, or with an open back?

And the man smiles meaningfully at the rude hints of friends about the stranger, languidly recalls a romantic dinner by candlelight and states for himself - "She has a cool figure ...". But at the same time, he carnivorously (and with a clear conscience) looks at the slender legs of other women ...

Before the “significant” day… A woman takes a shower in the morning, shaves her legs, makes up and combs her hair, changes outfits a hundred times and every minute drops something from excitement. She calls her friends, asking one question - “How should I behave? Agree or not? ”, And she herself is terribly afraid that his allusion to a “special” date is just her fantasy. The man is puzzled by only one question - where to get clean sheets?

Half an hour before her arrival. He stuffs his dirty socks under the sofa, hides the battery of empty bottles in the pantry, and after a glance in the mirror, decides to shave...

In the bed. She, clinging to his shoulder, gently coos about her "love to the grave", ending the monologue with the eternal phrase "don't leave me, darling." He snores in response...

Morning. The woman surprisingly quickly fit into the interior of the bachelor's "den", hosts the kitchen in his shirt over his naked body, and even quickly manages to grab the telephone receiver, sweetly purring into it "hello!" She does not want to leave, hinting that she would not mind staying here ... well, at least for one more night.

The man eats breakfast with gusto, condescendingly remarks that she looks funny in his shirt, gets a little nervous when she answers the phone and realizes by dinner that his “lair” is too small for two. Then he suddenly remembers that in the evening he has an important meeting on which his future depends ... "I'm sorry, dear, but I'll be busy tomorrow too..."

A week later. She cut off his phone, put up a guard at his entrance, tells her friends how unhappy she is, and what bastards men are.

He curses himself for hooking up with this idiot, sleeps with friends, turns off the phone and shrugs his shoulders at her sobbing "Traitor" - "Darling, I did not promise you anything."

In a month. She will excitedly tell her friends what “honey” she met yesterday, how cute he is and how much he loves her.

He will take the phone from the "cool" woman and will again be puzzled by one question - where to get a clean sheet?

This is how the plot twists in most stories, and you don’t have to be a wise woman to understand that it’s stupid to make far-reaching plans after the first meeting, and the difference in perception of current events leads us to a natural ending: “all women are bitches”, “all men are bastards”.

In continuation of the topic, I want to say the following - probably, after all, the main problem between us arises when we, women, try to understand men using our notorious logic.

Women's logic is a paradox, which is characterized by charm and charm. This is a kind of beautiful “rubbing glasses”, “driving by the nose” and “hanging noodles”. In other words, this is data falsification, a method that politicians, spies and ... women successfully use.

A brief excursion into history. Fascins (or falscins) in Ancient Rome were called amulets from the evil eye, which were supposed to confuse evil forces and prevent them from harming the owner of the amulet. Based on this, we can conclude that women armed themselves with their own mysterious logic with one goal - to protect themselves from too assertive and self-confident men.

“There is enough simplicity for every wise man” - have you heard this? There is no such sage who could not be led by the nose. And women do it best. Maybe that's why men call us deceitful and treacherous creatures? The whole secret is that they look at us primitively, and their curiosity towards us rarely extends beyond the question: I wonder if she is just as smart naked?

Everyone looks at a woman, few really see it, but only one understands ... and even that one is wrong. The sage is right when he said that the weakest point of a man is a woman. Dear ladies, fighting with a man, aren't we fighting against ourselves? Wouldn't it be better to delve into the essence of this "entertaining creation of nature" in order to find out all its "secret buttons" and press them at your discretion. There is another option: to understand a man, it is enough to accept him for who he is.

So which path have you chosen?

Feminists, fighting for equality and against male tyranny, have incurred the wrath of the entire stronger sex. I would call their method "assault", and it is not surprising that the "besieged fortress" fights back. Who wants to lose the conquered frontiers millennia ago?

Women who don't want to get themselves in trouble will vote for the "loved what it was" option, and I have no right to judge them for that. I can only say one thing: they deprive themselves of the pleasure of being themselves, and thereby doom themselves to constant conflict with their own “I”.

Example: you don’t like that a man constantly throws clothes all over the house, but that’s how he was born. You will have to accept his lack in order not to make daily scandals about the mess. Are you ready for such sacrifices?

Or your spouse thinks that a wife's destiny is a house, children, a kitchen. That a wife has no right to think about a career, that a woman after 30 does not need to use cosmetics, that ... But you never know these "what" will climb into a man's head, do you really accept all the quirks and agree with everything?

Personally, I want to delve into the essence of male logic. Let the husband stand at the helm, naively believing that he is the captain, but I will pave the way, like a wise pilot. I don’t want my family boat to “crash into everyday life,” like Mayakovsky’s, and I don’t want to adapt to someone else’s shortcomings. But I don’t intend to “swing rights”, as feminists.

Drawing conclusions from my observations, I discovered that all our misfortunes lie in male laziness. We are doing everything possible to establish contact with these "Martians", and they do not have time to get their asses off the couch and delve into the feminine essence. Tell me, how many articles have you seen in newspapers where husbands would ask to reveal to them the secret of female behavior? Mostly men either complain about misunderstanding or accuse us of all sins.

You can say one thing, think another, and do a third, but not in relation to a woman. With her, you have to think what you say, say what you do and do what you think. True, this is not at all what she wants. Men don't understand this. But we always know what they want to hear at the moment, and what action they expect from us.

Let's consider a few significant moments, and replenish the piggy bank this time not with points, but with wise phrases.

- Remember that the behavior of a man during an argument with a woman is the best indicator of his upbringing. Another wise guy considers himself a real apostle, before whom the wife should tremble. Our task is to help him understand the difference between an “apostle” and a “mutt”, which, in essence, a man is.

– In an ordinary dispute, the one who convinces the opponent wins. In an argument with a woman, a man wins, who changes the judgment "I am convinced" to "I am convinced."

- The position of a woman should always be unchanged: I know that it is easy to convince me, so none of your arguments will affect me.

– A real man knows that in a dispute with a woman, silence is heroism. A wise woman always remembers: the weaker her arguments in a dispute with a man, the stronger her position should be. But, if you want to win an unconditional victory, do it halfway, and lose the second.

According to a woman, the most stupid men are those who do not know which She really needs it right now. It is risky to tell us only one truth, but on the other hand, it is impossible to lie to a woman at all. In the first case, a good scolding awaits a man for inappropriate truthfulness, in the second - a tantrum for deceit. However, in a relationship with a woman one cannot do without a lie, and in order for her to forgive the deceit, she needs to lie with inspiration, sincerely. A sincere lie is almost the truth.

Such truth we believe willingly. A man who wants to impress us with his sensitivity should not so much speak beautifully and listen to us attentively as admire us. This is exactly what a woman expects from him.

Example: a husband, eating your meatballs, will notice that they are a little burnt. Looking at you in a new suit, he will say that the skirt is a bit short. Regarding your business, he will express the opinion that things are not done that way. In your eyes, such a man will become a complete fool, because he does not understand at all that such you really don't need it.

Conclusion. The truth that can be told to a woman is of two kinds: that which is forbidden to be spoken seriously, and that which cannot be spoken of in jest.

Now let's talk about the relationship between men and women, and once again we will be convinced: "the dog is buried" precisely in misunderstanding.

It's no secret that there are men who need to be rude in order for them to appreciate your delicacy. They will not delve into the essence of female logic, even cry!

For example, you say - “I did not expect from you ...”, and the man thinks that he greatly surprised you with something. It does not occur to him that this is how you expressed your disappointment.

You whisper - “well, you are good ...”, and the man imagines himself to be the standard of virtues. But we had something completely different in mind.

A man seeking to control a woman is like an anchor dreaming of pulling the shores behind him. There are some individuals who, even in silence, have grammatical errors.

Men differ from each other in that some start without the certainty that they will finish, while others finish without even starting. At the same time, both of them imagine themselves to be giants in all areas.

In fact, a man strives to become what he wants, does everything he can for this and ... eventually becomes who he has to be. Only under the guidance of a wise woman is he able to realistically assess his potential. By regularly exaggerating the merits of a man, we do not flatter his pride, but slightly raise the bar that he must overcome. Exaggerating our merits, a man approaches this bar and grows in our eyes. Everything is so simple...

And now a little wisdom for us and about us.

It is not common for a woman to grieve for a lost thing for a long time, otherwise she will not be able to sincerely rejoice at what she has found.

Escorting a man is easier than escorting him. Although, the second is more reliable.

The only way to get rid of temptation is to give in to it.

A woman always builds illusions. Then, either the man pays for them, or the woman mourns them.

A woman will allow only those who can play the melody that excites her to play the strings of her soul.

There are a hundred ways to say "no", fifty ways to say "maybe..." and only one way to say "yes". That's why women are so calculating when giving consent.

A woman will have fun when a man gets tired of having fun. Hence the saying - he who laughs last laughs best.

A promising man is one who promises a lot and delivers nothing.

A promising woman is one who shows great promise.

A woman has two sides: if you want to know one - praise her, to know the other - do not praise. But no man, no matter what he does, will ever know both sides of her at the same time.

The real dignity of a woman is to worthily experience her beauty, and the woman who, after fifty years, understands this, is wise.

And "for a snack" a story with a hint. Reading it, delve into the essence of the problem and find the reason for the degradation of male love.

I called the story "EVOLUTION OF THE ETERNAL QUESTION".

“I don’t know about other husbands, but I noticed a long time ago that my wife really likes to ask the same question. Rather, at first her words sounded like a question, but gradually they changed, taking the form of an ultimatum. Then the wife began to pronounce the same words with an accusatory accent. The strange evolution is a little alarming and frightening, and most importantly, I don’t know what it will result in about ten years from now.

In the early years, my wife had little of my attention and care, she pestered me daily with the question - do you love me? She had to look for more and more evidence, because a short “yes” was no longer enough for her. The fact that I help around the house, do not drink and do not scandal does not count. Give the moon from the sky, lisp the tenderness of a veal, compose vulgar nicknames - and you are a loving husband. Are all women really so limited that they prefer empty “air shaking” to their taste than real actions?

Here is my neighbor, a drunkard and rowdy, every other day he drives his wife around the house, and she assures - “Oh, how he loves me!” You see, he calls her a "goat", sings songs about love and every time on his knees he begs for forgiveness. When sober ... The rest of the time, the "goat" is replaced by a "goat", songs - by drunken cries, and kneeling - by assault. Beats - does it mean love?

Naturally, due to my upbringing, I did not begin to adopt the experience of a neighbor, but I did something. There is a saying: less words - more action. I made a small change to it. Now my wife went to the shops, she also knocked out the carpets, and I hid the “stash”, lay on the sofa and endlessly spoke affectionate words.

Do you think your wife is happy? It was then that the main question entered a new phase and sounded menacing - "if you love me, then ..." The end of the phrase varied depending on the circumstances, and each time I had fun until I dropped, hearing its continuation. An interesting little thing: when I voluntarily cleaned my trash in the pantry and washed the floors, they doubted my feelings and demanded words. Now these words are like “noodles on the ears”, but my “kitty” grumbles day and night.

Well, I tried this time too. Here you are, madam, and tenderness, and a nail in the wall, and coffee in bed! Am I now the perfect husband? Butter figurines! The evolution of the eternal question, because of my connivance, has taken on an unprecedented scale ... Oh, they say correctly that you can’t spoil these women, they will sit on your neck, they won’t even blink an eye.

When I first heard from my "mouse" - "if you loved me, then ..." - I was just speechless! Here are those on! And what am I doing, if not proof of this love of yours? The continuation of the phrase sounded innocent with murderous female logic - "... then I would have bought me a ring with a diamond." Yeah, at the same time a yacht and a house in the Canary Islands… Don't you want a lip-roller? I can arrange, my fish.

I spat on everything and stopped proving the obvious. Rather, this “obvious” has also evolved over the years and turned into “incredible”.

Once I really loved my wife, but now I'm tired. If you are asked for seven years in a row - how much is twice two? - you, in the end, will go berserk and one day you will bark - "five !!!" because I'm tired...

And the evolution of the question that worried my wife so much has “spun” on a new round, and it already sounds hysterical - “you don’t love me ...”

You know, I can hardly restrain myself to disagree - “yes, I don’t like it.” Only I feel sorry for my wife, and I’m curious: how else can this eternal question be “spun up”?

How many points to award to a wise woman who completed the evolution of the eternal question at the first stage and settled on the only correct phrase - “I love you” ... Perhaps 10 points for each year of married life is a fair reward!

A man, for some reason lingering in childhood, is attracted to a woman only as long as she protects him from the hardships and dangers of adulthood, without demanding anything for herself in return.

A bossy man chooses a woman who looks soft and kind. But, as soon as she shows at least a drop of her will, it begins to seem to him that she encroaches on his unshakable authority. And - sorry, goodbye ... At all times, a woman without a partner has been the object of attention for gossip and psychologists. But it turns out that the world is full of men who would like to have a family, but circumstances interfere.

It's harder for a woman, you say? I don’t think, because in our time the weaker sex is no longer waiting for the prince to ride on a white horse and lead him down the aisle. Women themselves take the initiative: they get to know each other, write ads in newspapers, even make offers first. And yet they are considered deprived and flawed.

Single men are classified as strange egoists, because marriage for any of them is a very real step. Look, how many “ownerless” brides are around, what else do they, bachelors, need ...

So let's figure it out without emotions.

Most single men were once husbands. They burned themselves once, now they will think a hundred times before trying again. Such a candidate will not give up his newfound freedom for any price, and the longer this “free flight” of his lasts, the more difficult it is to seduce a stubborn man with the charms of family comfort.

The fear of the nightmare of "marriage hell" is stronger than the fear of being alone. Moreover, such a man does not allow himself complete isolation, and small joys on the side of him do not oblige him to anything. It is still possible to “capture” such a bachelor, the main thing is not to waste time, but also not to flog a fever.

You can spend time with this, but do not harbor empty illusions.

Unwittingly bachelors are the strangest and most incomprehensible. They want to marry, but they make such demands on the chosen one that my mother is dear! Obviously impossible requests suggest that a man is subconsciously afraid of women. His desires narrow the circle of searches, because in each of us there are deviations from the norm, and the bachelor persists - "give me an ideal!"

Do you think that by meeting his requirements, you will conquer a cold heart? How, the groom fled with you to the registry office! He turns up his nose from the submissive, and from the neat, and from the smart ones, dooming himself to loneliness for fear of being under your heel. The funny thing is that, hiding behind his high moral standards, he will not even bring you to bed. He simply does not understand how relations between the sexes are built, so he rushes with his desire to start a family, like a chicken with an egg. And you do not peck on the hook, it is better to take pity on the poor fellow, and ... look for another candidate.

There are loners who despise women with every fiber of their soul. For such, the weaker sex is just an addition to other earthly joys, and trusting women, especially getting married ... Don't be ridiculous, he doesn't even know such words. I do not advise you to get involved with this, unless, of course, you are a masochist.

The next type of bachelors are those who are not able to become attached to people. True, the thought of a family is perceived by them as the norm, so the poor fellows are torn between two fires. And give them freedom, and a family, like everyone else. They will exhaust themselves, torture their wife... Tantalum torment, not life.

Why does everyone feel sorry for single women, if men suffer no less? Yes, we just rush about with our misfortune, and they treat loneliness as a real fact. Where have you seen a bachelor who would lament: “Oh, I have no wife! Why me?" The men do not complex about this, they do not consider themselves unhappy, they do not need them, even if they fail, but their own. They know their worth, they talk about the problem with humor, they don’t look for flaws in themselves, but they say that there are no worthy brides today.

And women ... Listen to the titles of articles that are full of newspapers and magazines: "Loneliness is my pain", "Women's loneliness is the cause of complexes." You will start feeling sorry for yourself.

Look around - how many men who doomed themselves to a bachelor life! A lot of work for a lonely wise woman. If you approach wisely, pick up the key, and “reprogram” his views ...

Women have hundreds of tricks in their arsenal, various clever traps, and all of them are for men. There is something to shy away from. So the bachelors developed a strong immunity against the family, they hold the defense. Sometimes a thought flashes through a bachelor: “but should I marry?” He will crawl out like a hermit crab from a shell, admire us, emancipated, but notorious - and hide back into the mink. “No,” the bachelor whispers maliciously, “Look for a fool elsewhere, but I feel good already. I am free and happy! And all the troubles in the world are from women!

Having more or less figured out the bachelors, and having understood where to move in order to change their blissful state, we begin to master the second step and move on to the "springboard".

By the way, it is never superfluous for a wise woman to remember one masculine feature: joy can unsettle a man just like an unpleasant event.

In fact, any organism reacts violently to everything that happens, especially if this event affects our interests. The body doesn't care whether we got bad news or good news.

However, it is easier for women in the sense that they find support from their girlfriends and turn to smart magazines and books for advice. Men in this matter are like little children.

Our task: to learn to be a "lightning rod" for male negative emotions. To do this, consider several situations in which luck, it seems, should bring joy to a man. Do not believe it, but instead of joy, they experience uncertainty, discomfort and even fear. And, if you are the cause of all this, then the man will simply bypass you. And, if only he finds support and comfort from you ... Do you catch the difference?

So, the first reason for joy: after a long courtship, you finally invited a man to visit. Before that, he thought: I'm crazy about her, I passionately want her! After the invitation, the man will certainly spend a sleepless night, especially if he has the most serious feelings for you.

The mere desire to show the maximum of their capabilities and show off in front of their beloved in all its glory brings a man to a little stress. The body reacts by lowering testosterone, which in turn undermines self-confidence. A man persuades himself: stop it, everything will pass at the highest level! – but even more nervous.

Your actions: do not resort to the help of alcohol as a sedative. Offer a man mineral water, it will increase blood flow, blood circulation will become more even, and a good portion of ice cream with chocolate will calm the nervous system.

The second reason for joy: the man was promoted. If he has been waiting for this event for a long time, then he will certainly begin to worry about new responsibilities, about possible complications with colleagues. All together will lead to a sluggish current depression, reminiscent of a nervous breakdown. A man starts smoking a lot, drinking strong coffee, which promotes the release of adrenaline into the body. But the body is already unable to cope with an excess of fussy energy.

How to calm a man and inspire him with confidence? The main thing is to make sure that he observes the regimen, include vegetable dishes in his diet and say more that you highly appreciate his professional qualities and are confident of success.

The third reason for joy: the vacation that you have been waiting for is approaching.

In your imagination, you draw tempting pictures of a vacation together, and at this time the man begins to get nervous. The thought of packing, long lines, hotels and misunderstandings with luggage drives him to a breakdown. Such an “appendage” to a pleasant rest does not inspire a man much, and your task is to rid him of negative emotions.

Start gathering in advance and according to a proven scheme: a list of necessary things, a supply of newspapers and crossword puzzles, a few packs of crackers. You will offer them to your sweetheart when his nerves start to fool around, because carbohydrates are better than candy and chewing gum, they can calm them down. The most important thing is not to strain yourself, but to have fun and not forget to admire the man who gave you such an unforgettable trip.

The fourth reason for joy: the diagnosis that the man was given was not confirmed. It seems that you can breathe calmly, but he stubbornly scrolls the unpleasant ending in his head: “What if…”

If the man’s thoughts are not directed in time in a different direction, he will soon begin to experience fear for his life, begin to be cautious. Psychologists advise in such cases to write down your feelings, advise the man to do the same. Inspire him that caution will not hurt, but you can not bring it to mania. Do not repeat endlessly: with whom it does not happen, everything will be settled ...

It is better to rejoice together, draw conclusions and do not torment yourself. It's all over...

When a person is under the influence of stress, the heartbeat quickens, blood sugar levels jump. Physical exercise will burn off excess chemicals produced by the body under the influence of panic. The higher the degree of joyful excitement, the more unstable the state of health. The greater the hope of success, the greater the fear of failure.

Our stresses are not triggered by events, but by the meaning we attach to events.

Now, when you come across a man who behaves strangely and withdrawn, do not jump to conclusions: he is a weirdo, a nervous type and in general ...

Think about it - weren't you the cause of unexpected joy that unsettled the poor fellow and brought him to stress? Help the man calm down, and then he will experience the joy of communicating with you in full, without any negative emotions.

What can I say about the third step? A smooth landing should be carried out slowly, and most importantly, imperceptibly, as an experienced navigator does. Avoid pressure and pressure on the psyche, this "zone of turbulence" will pretty much pat your "wings" and it is likely that the "passenger" (read "man") will use the catapult.

After going through all these steps, I think you yourself will figure out exactly how your loved one has changed. former a bachelor, and what came of it all ...

I must say that I am a working woman, our team at work is not that big - you, me, and you and me ...

And recently, in our small women's community, the lunch break began to be fun and useful. I know that many women spend this time running around the shops, and we have heart-to-heart conversations under fragrant seagulls. By the way, I’m not the only one who noticed that we began to complain to each other about the “unlucky” life. I can’t say that the reason lies precisely in the discussions, but there is no doubt that they dramatically changed our perception of current events and our attitude towards ourselves.

Just recently, Nina Semyonovna (the one who has a husband, and children, and peace in the family) remembered the old film "Men" and said that she really liked the main character. And Katenka (our mother is a loner) noticed: there is nothing to look at other people's men if there is a beloved husband at hand! Here Lyudmila Sergeevna joined in, she remembered a wonderful phrase from the film: “Why do we, men, walk with some and marry others?”

I even choked on my tea, well, I think - hold on, babonki! After all, there is only one married woman among us - Nina Semyonovna - she should take the rap! Lyudmila is divorced, Katerina never had a husband, there is a special conversation about me: I have a husband, but it would be better if he didn’t exist at all. So let a friend explain why we are worse than her?

But Nina just shrugged her shoulders and silently listened to our discussions on this topic. First, we remembered cases from our own lives.

The guy with whom I met for six months once said that he dreams of living in the bosom of nature, to have his own house, household, a bunch of kids and an obedient wife. While he was talking about the house and the kids, I still hoped for our joint future, since I myself come from the village. But in order to be submissive and obedient… Maybe you will say that I didn’t love the boy, otherwise I would have accepted his conditions and “twisted cows’ tails” for the rest of my life? It's not about that.

I looked at the sweetheart with different eyes and honestly answer - I was disappointed in him. He later found - still a village beauty who met all his requirements, now lives with her and is quite pleased with himself.

My second admirer generally spat in my soul. By the way, he was the first to talk about the wedding, and a month later he mumbled that we were not a couple. Having entered the academy, he decided that the family would distract him from his scientific activities, and a year later he married the daughter of a professor.

These are the stories about how they loved me, but they didn’t call me in marriage. What was wrong with me?

The story of Lyudmila Sergeevna turned out to be even more fascinating. She was friends with a guy for three years, and then it turned out that this cunning man was also courting Lyudochka's friend at the same time. The conspirator ... So, when it came to a marriage proposal, the gentleman said that life with Lyudmila would be boring and dull, and he was used to the "eternal holiday of soul and body." The girlfriend approached in all respects and became his wife. And Lyudmila rashly married the "first comer." You already know that he left her two years ago.

Katyusha also spoke about her “prince”, who left her behind for the sake of high principles. They even began to live together, and decided to sign after the institute. But then her hero met a girl in a store, jokingly told her a couple of compliments, and the girl lost her head. Everything would be fine, but the boy turned out to be very compassionate: the new passion was a cripple, moreover, an orphan. Well, he did not dare to leave her, and Katyusha "with a stomach" - easily.

When we told our stories, Nina Semyonovna suddenly raised her voice. She expressed the idea that men walk with those with whom they have fun, fall in love with those to whom their heart lies. But they have to live under the same roof with a real person, and not with a soul, so they marry those who remind them of the ideal. For example, on a submissive quiet woman or a business lady.

Yes, our Nina knows how to bring down from heaven to earth with one phrase! And we have wasted so much time talking about love. You know, we didn’t answer anything to our colleague (thankfully, and the lunch break came to an end), although I really wanted to ask: does she really live with a real person, and not with a kindred spirit? I wonder how she would respond...

Of course, every woman dreams of meeting the man of her dreams. And so, he appears on the horizon: attentive, imposing, smart, but ... Something in his behavior is alarming, and the woman's heart feels a catch. And not in vain.

How do they say about a woman who has found herself a rich friend and lives at his expense? In principle, they state that the woman got a good job. What do you call a man who lives at the expense of a woman? Very succinctly - Alphonse! I was lucky enough to encounter such people twice, however, fond memories of one remained, but not so much of the other. However, first things first.

"Dear friend".

One summer I was selling bananas in the market. It was approaching evening, my "owners" apparently forgot about me, so I sat angry and hungry among the boxes. Bananas were already sickening, I really wanted to drop everything and go home.

Then a man appeared ... I noticed him a long time ago, he was walking around the market with a delicious pie in his hands. Either my hungry look had such an effect on him, or the man was kind by nature, but soon he came up to me with a plate of steaming pies and sat down next to me.

“Here, eat,” my savior said, and he lit a cigarette. I was embarrassed, my stomach growled disgustingly. At parting, the man handed me a business card with a phone number, “Call me tomorrow, I will find you a better job.”

Eugene turned out to be an unusually pleasant person. From the first meeting, he surprised me with a confession, “Just don’t be offended, but as a woman you don’t interest me.” Thus began our friendship. Zhenya's reverent participation in my life and the help with which I was surrounded made this relationship strange. A week later, another confession followed, “You know, I will always find a woman for one night, and you are dear to me as a friend.”

If I had problems, my dear friend came running at the first call and demanded nothing in return. He brought food, gave gifts to my children, came just to lie on his favorite sofa with a newspaper in his hands. Sometimes he showed up with another passion and arranged a small party. I realized how much I won by not adding to his lists, because it turned out to be more pleasant to be a friend. By the way, Zhenya had an amazing scent for women and turned out to be an ordinary gigolo. He himself did not hide the fact that he lives at the expense of rich "hens", using their money, and in return gives them something that no man can give a woman. Zhenya did not fill the price. All the ladies with whom he had ever met, even after the breakup, continued to treat Zhenechka with awe. Zhenya didn’t leave any of them forever, he often called all his “bunny darlings”, got someone tickets to a camp for children, someone made an appointment with a doctor he knew. He spent a lot of money, but once a year on March 8 he gave gifts to everyone.

Often I tried to understand: how does he manage to seduce a rich lady, put on shoes - dress for her money and at the same time remain in her eyes the best man in the world? Probably, Zhenechka is a ladies' man by nature, even in the role of a gigolo he is natural and desirable. And yet, I'm glad that I remained just his friend.

"Thorns and Roses".

When I first saw this man, I was seized with tetanus for about five minutes. In his appearance, he resembled a tramp - an artist or a homeless person. It turned out that torn jeans, shoulder-length hair and greasy sweaters are not a sign of poverty, but a way of life.

One of the guests brought Pavel to my house, he seemed to me gloomy and unsociable: he sat in the corner all evening, looking at me with his black eyes. Closer to midnight, he went out into the corridor, talked to someone for a long time on the phone, and an hour later my doorbell rang. On the threshold stood a young guy with a huge bag in his hands, from which scarlet roses proudly protruded.

The guests gasped, and only Pavel was not surprised at anything. From the bag I took out a bottle of expensive wine, fruit, cake - all this was passed by a stranger with the words "this is for you." My strange visitor disappeared imperceptibly, but did not disappear completely. The silent siege lasted for six months, and when the same boy handed me flowers, I knew they were from Pavel. Then all of a sudden Paul spoke...

His love was frightening, and the fact that he was married three times was alarming, and yet I agreed to live together.

Imported equipment filled my apartment, repairs and rearrangement of furniture were started. Somehow, imperceptibly, Pavel settled down and began to become impudent: I went to work, he lay on the sofa; I cooked and washed, he went to friends. A month later, I got my sight! Pavel came to me with one package, all the videos are not his, the business has stalled, however, like Pavel's love for me.

This man is doing well! So I thought and gathered his simple belongings into a bundle. How naive I was, believing that the gigolo would voluntarily refuse the feeder! For another three months, "beloved" shouted under my windows, what an ungrateful rubbish I am. He called me at night and begged me to forgive in the name of his great love. But I was adamant, and Pavel calmed down.

I wonder who Pavlusha is fooling now? Of course, he found himself a rich fool and lives happily ever after. It's so hard to resist when a gallant gentleman is courting you, when scarlet roses are thrown at your feet!

Don't get hurt on the thorns...

I don’t know if it’s worth adding this topic to the piggy bank of female wisdom, but I’m sure of one thing: there are a lot of gigolos among men, which means that women must somehow protect themselves from these “dear friends”. The main thing is not to lose self-respect and not to waste time, otherwise you will turn into an uncomplaining cash cow. Chase gigolos in the neck, there will be enough good men for our age!

By the way, it is not difficult to unravel the cunning tricks of gigolos, it is enough to know a couple of their tricks. A few such secrets were told to me by "dear friend" Eugene, and I, in turn, will reveal them to you.

A man - gigolo by nature is not only a ladies' man, he is also a subtle psychologist. Sitting in front of you and looking into your eyes, he starts a heart-to-heart conversation, and, as if inadvertently, strokes the stem of a glass or gently squeezes a lighter with his hand. He does this according to a complex system: you say - his hand is inactive so as not to distract you; he says - a cunning manipulation begins, the effect of which the woman involuntarily transfers to herself.

Asking you simple, at first glance, questions about what you like and what you like, the man looks at you and smiles kindly. As soon as you start to answer: "I love ...", "I prefer ..." - his eyes move slightly to the left of your shoulder, and his hand imperceptibly performs the same action (for example, straightens his tie or strokes his chin). You develop a conditioned reflex to this gesture, and in the future, as soon as a man rubs his chin or touches his tie, “I love ...”, “I like ...” flashes in your head. But now this phrase is not associated with your favorite movie or perfume, but with a specific man.

Of course, not all gigolos are strong in psychology, but there is no doubt that they are all unusually cunning. Somehow they told me about two conquerors of ladies' hearts who acted together. First, “number one” met the women, and his task was: to find out the lady’s addictions, her weaknesses and vulnerabilities. Then the gentleman departed in an unknown direction, and "number Two" appeared on the stage. It was he who became the real "ideal" that a woman dreamed of all her life. It didn't even occur to the poor thing that the romantic appearance of a passionate lover of Brahms or Tyutchev was just a rehearsed mask.

Well, did I scare you, dear ladies? Now, in every gallant gentleman, you will feel like a gigolo, and you will start to shy away from any signs of attention from men, like the devil from incense. Here it is appropriate to recall not the saying “God protects the safe”, but the eternal wisdom: “he who is warned is armed”.

On this optimistic note, let's end the chapter.

So, you managed to get your hands on the fairy prince and almost lure him into the net of a happy family life. Congratulations, half done! However, one important detail overshadows your joy: your prince is dressed ... how to put it mildly ... without gloss. That is, you have no doubt that “they snatched off the groom of royal blood”, but others doubt - the image does not match!

Agree that this is exactly what men over 30 rarely think about. Statistics say that only 15% of the male population really follows fashion. The majority, and they are about 45%, fall into two extremes: either adhere to the once and for all chosen style of “dull dullness”, or get stuck somewhere between “eternal boy” and “dandy”. The remaining 40% prefer old jeans and comfortable sweaters from a hundred years ago.

Let's start with shirts, because this is the second skin of any man.

Button-down shirts are an invention of the Americans, and they appeared not so long ago, somewhere in the beginning of the 20th century.

What you need to know:

1. In a business-style shirt, there should be one pocket, and loading it with business cards, glasses and cigarettes is bad form.

2. The fabric of a high-quality shirt should be smooth and without a pronounced texture. Naturally, the body should not shine through it.

3. A shirt made of 100% cotton is not the best option, because it quickly wrinkles, but with the addition of synthetics (30%) - just right.

4. If a man puts on a shirt under a suit (or sweater), make sure that the cuffs peek out from under the jacket by 1 cm. Naturally, both the cuffs and the collar should amaze those around you with their cleanliness - but this is your concern.

And now something about collars:

1. the most fashionable - "shark". Turn-down collar with pointed edges, widely separated to the sides.

2. In second place - "kent". Swing collar with sharp long corners that look straight down and form an acute angle.

3. Still fashionable - "batten". Its sharp edges are fastened with buttons to the shirt, but this does not mean that a tie is required under such a shirt.

4. For pullovers - "varno". The wide turn-down edges of this thick textured collar do not touch the shirt.

5. For special occasions - "butterfly". The collar is a stand-up collar with long pointed edges, bent to the sides at an angle of 45 degrees. This shirt is worn under a tuxedo or tailcoat.

6. The most classic is “mandarin”. The collar is a stand-up collar, not wide and low, tightly fitting the neck.

And some useful tips "just in case".

If your man is not a genius, but an ordinary ordinary man, then he sometimes wants to feel like a “hot macho” or “free artist”. Do not protest, but help the sweetheart "enter the image" competently, otherwise his knowledge of design will play a cruel joke with him.

So, the “Latin” style is, as it were, careless, half-unbuttoned silk shirts. Color - from black to blue with lemon and coral patterns. Under them: either flared trousers or similar jeans.

Style "poetic mess" - dangling sweaters, baggy trousers. The colors are dull, olive; the texture of the fabric is crumpled wrinkled.

The denim style is an exaggerated retro, and therefore the presence of cool patches, man-made graffiti and home-made holes in decent places.

There is also a sporty style that men have their own ideas about, and God forbid you confuse the symbols of his favorite team with the label of an underground company. I will say that both letters and numbers have their own special meaning here, so it is very easy to get confused. The only thing you need to pay attention to: do not let a man wear pants with bubbles on his knees, antediluvian sneakers and T-shirts stretched out at random.

Now let's talk about the suit. As the song says, the main thing is that he sits well.

By the way, in Europe they believe that the wardrobe of a modern man should have at least eight suits (4 for each season). By our standards, this is a natural show off, and the norm is two suits for about ten years. With proper alternation of shirts and ties, a wise wife will be able to create the illusion among others that her husband changes his suit almost daily.

So what you need to know about the suit:

1. a good suit (woolen or half-woolen) costs from 100 USD. e. and ad infinitum.

2. A tall, slender man will fit a slightly fitted jacket with wide, stiff shoulders.

4. It is better for a thin man to give preference to a double-breasted jacket, this will visually expand the figure.

5. The length of the jacket should be such that, with the arms lowered, the fingertips are on the same level with the floor.

6. Owners of non-standard figures better let them order a suit from a tailor, but there is advice on this matter - carefully check the coincidence of loops and buttons.

7. It is obligatory to try on a suit in a shirt and shoes, only in this way you will understand whether this thing suits you.

What else you need to pay attention to:

Fabric composition: 95% wool and 5% lycra. As a rule, artificial additives should not be more than 30%. Summer suits can be linen.

Where and with what to wear a suit? Yes, there would be a suit, but there is a reason! Why not go to a concert, visit, a friend's wedding? For official receptions and for dinner in a restaurant with a lady - a tuxedo. For a gala evening - a black suit.

But, one suit will not make the weather, such details as combinatoriality are still important here (remember Shurochka from "Office Romance" - that's where the expert on this part is).

If the goal of a man is not formality, but style, you can wear a turtleneck or T-shirt under the jacket.

The combination of color and elements of clothing:

1. gray suit \ white shirt (blue, ivory) \ any tie \ black shoes \ socks to match the tie.

2. Dark gray suit \ white shirt (light pink, ivory) - \ red and black tie \ black shoes and black socks.

3. Dark blue suit \ white shirt \ white-red-blue tie \ black shoes \ dark blue (maroon) socks.

4. Sand suit \ light blue shirt \ dark blue tie \ light brown shoes \ light blue socks.

5. black suit \ white shirt \ silver (gray, red-brown) tie \ black shoes \ smoky black socks.

As you can see, a pair of suits, 4-5 shirts, 3-4 ties can make up a different ensemble for both the office and a visit. It's not often that you have to drag your hubby out shopping so he always looks trendy and stylish.

Here we come to the real problem!

Developing the right taste in a man is not as difficult as it seems, but the main trick is that a man cannot be lifted from a comfortable chair by any means ...

“Honey, you need a new shirt!” - the wife gently runs her hand over her husband's chest, adjusting the collar of his shirt, - Yes, and it would not hurt to buy a suit, your old one is a hundred years old for lunch!

- Why? It’s convenient for me, too, - the husband frowns with displeasure, looking in the mirror, - And the shirt, it seems, is nothing ... You should spend all your money!

Familiar picture, right? The wife sniffles offendedly: she wanted to please her husband, but received a reprimand for prodigality. The husband mumbles that he didn’t mean it at all ...

So, dear ladies, do not listen to the confused excuses of men, in fact they are very fond of updates, but pathologically they do not like to go shopping. For women, this is a real problem, since our husbands have non-standard figures, any thing needs to be measured.

If nothing is done, then soon the men will start walking around in torn trousers and worn shirts, and we will have to blush for them.

Some items can be adapted to buy "by eye": for example, socks, ties and shirts. There is also a small minus here: the spouse can find fault with the colors. In this case, say that on sale there were beige shirts with boats and gray ones with balls. Men are, in fact, very trusting.

You can lure your husband into the store by saying that you want to buy a blouse for yourself, but you need his advice, as an expert in this area. In the department store, gently ask him to try on that nice little pullover (suit, shirt), in which “you, dear, will be simply irresistible!”

And it is not necessary to buy a blouse, it will not fit in size, color, style (options of your choice).

After purchasing a new thing, do not get tired of repeating how handsome your husband is in new socks, how sexy he is with this tie! And in general, he is such a sweetheart that he agreed to accompany you, and all the women around look at him with lust, and you are jealous, because ...

Don't worry, the man will swallow your monologue.

But what should not be done is to put forward an ultimatum: “Yes, I’m trying for you, but you, ungrateful ...”, “Choose - either we go to the store, or no fishing tomorrow! I'm already ashamed in front of people!

Most likely, the husband will choose fishing, while sending your store along with you ... very far.

There is no need to set other men as an example: “Lyudka takes her man to the market every month, but what a man! Picture! And you…"

In general, if you act correctly, then soon the husband will get used to forays into stores and he will develop a conditioned reflex: he agreed with his wife - get encouragement. In fact, your spouse is quite pleased with both a stylish raincoat and a fashionable cap. But he is embarrassed to show his joy and does not like to go shopping ...

And now it's time to replenish the piggy bank. Those who do not have a husband yet, shake your mustache. This is a task for married ladies who have not yet forgotten the taste of "honeymoon".

This time you won’t get off with answers to questions alone ... Have you already guessed what task I have prepared for you? Yes, yes, dear young wives! 20 points will be awarded to those of you who can convince your husband to accompany them to the store for shopping. No, it should not be a grocery store, but a department store or, in extreme cases, a clothing market.

Another 10 points will be given to women who manage to buy their husband a shirt or T-shirt after he tries on a dozen things.

And, finally, 30 points are awarded to women who can create a stylish "combinatorial" for any life occasion from the items in the husband's wardrobe.

The same amount if the husband agrees to dress according to your taste not for a case of beer, but voluntarily.

So, here he is - your prince, dandy, or whatever you call him ... It's nice to look expensive! And who was before that?

By the way, who was he really before he fell into your capable hands? This could easily be “read” not along the lines of his hand, and not even in his horoscope ...

And now let's talk about some of the juicy details of men's lives, which they are not too eager to reveal to us (and rightly so, by the way, they do). So, something about pajamas and socks…

In the wardrobe of our chosen ones there are serious things that men do not attach much importance to. And in vain, because such, at first glance, prosaic items, like socks and pajamas, can tell an observant woman a lot about their owner.

Having a wealth of experience, I discovered an interesting pattern: sweethearts, bores and machos prefer their “night cap”. In other words, putting on (or not putting on) pajamas, a man involuntarily exposes his soul to you. This nice little secret I discovered suddenly, like Newton his law of gravity. Only an apple fell on his head, and it dawned on me under more pleasant circumstances. If you want - check my observations, if you want - take my word for it.

My first "guinea pig" was Sanek. When I first saw this sweetheart in pajamas, I almost burst out laughing right into his bewildered physiognomy: the sweetheart's flannel jacket was generously embroidered with bright balloons, and the red buttons were bashfully buttoned up to the chin. And this Casanova intends to give me an unforgettable night of insane passion? The most I hoped for was a peaceful sleep in a friendly embrace. But ... a surprise awaited me! Sasha turned out to be a real dreamer, and the fireworks of caresses, kisses and balloons continued until the morning. And I concluded: men who prefer pajamas "a la baby" have an unusual sense of humor not only in life, but also in bed.

By the way, this has nothing to do with the owner of classic pajamas in boring stripes. I also had such an esthete, and I must say that in bed he did not impress me. Of course, I loved going out with him. When a gallant gentleman walks nearby, who gently supports you by the elbow, and your friends burst with envy - there is something exciting in this.

True, the night with such a person will pass like an exam for "professional suitability", and, being active in his arms, you risk being branded as a vulgar person, and not a Beautiful Muse.

When I got a taste, I continued the experience with men. Shocks and disappointments succeeded each other, and I changed fans and drew conclusions. Briefs and T-shirts are the traditional "night uniform" of the world's most boring types. Alas, most exemplary family men and excellent fathers do not feel adventurous, and their wives cannot boast of the sexual fantasies of their husbands. On the other hand, "underpants - a T-shirt" practically does not require anything from you, sex with them resembles a fast train on schedule, and life is reliable and predictable.

Another thing is if a loved one dives into bed only in shorts. It has not yet matured enough to the state of "nude", but is full of surprises. Get ready to get a portion of aggressive sex and complacent reasoning about female independence. If you are able to tame this "lion in shorts", then in his eyes you will become the most desirable woman. The main thing is to pretend that you perceive him as a leader, admire his masculine strength and constantly assure that your beauty and divine charm are everything for him and belongs only to him! In return, you will get an improvisation of "sexual toughness" and a sea of ​​complacent tenderness. Not the worst option.

You ask: are there men who sleep naked? They say that there is, but I have not come across such. Perhaps, like true children of nature, they flutter through life on their own, and it is impossible to keep them around. Yes, and it is not necessary.

Because a fairy tale remains a fairy tale only when it does not turn into reality. If such a moth flutters into my hands (or rather, into my bed), I will enjoy a short moment of a bright holiday and set the moth free. Why break your heart for unfulfilled hopes ...

Who would I choose as my life partner? It depends on what I want from a man and on what ... what he used to sleep in. It certainly will not be the original, sleeping in a nightgown! They say there are...

Yes, it’s more fun to “test” men in pajamas, but the situation is such that sometimes there is no opportunity to drag them into bed. Then in stock we have another way, no less piquant.

Before entrusting your fate into the hands of a charming man, carefully examine his socks. Of course, it is foolish to expect that he himself will voluntarily demonstrate this, sorry, not always fresh evidence, but there are many cunning tricks. For example, invite a gentleman to visit, then he will have to take off his shoes. And you will have a unique opportunity to quietly study his "sore spot". Alas, there are instances that are able to unceremoniously stomp in dirty boots on your carpets - cross them off the list without regret!

If you can't trap him for a visit, set up a date on the shore of a pond. With a playful laugh, throwing off sandals (or boots) on the go, run into the water. Your friend is simply obliged to follow a bold example. Here it is - the desired moment, and in front of you are the socks of the chosen one, so to speak, his "second self".

Hollow socks. Find a reason why it's better for you to remain friends. Why do you need a guy who even came on a date in such socks?

Carefully darned socks should lead to two versions: either they were repaired by a loving wife, or by a caring mother. Both options are not in your favor, because a man is either an exemplary spouse (a bad wife is unlikely to darn socks), or an excellent son, and an unpleasant surprise awaits you after meeting his mom.

If the holes are patched ineptly, relax. In addition to problems with money, nothing threatens you in a new acquaintance. Or threatens to share the future with a miser.

The color of his socks will say even more about the character of a man.

In white - athletes like to flaunt (necessarily in combination with sneakers) or businessmen who do not understand anything about fashion.

Reds prefer natures secretive, outwardly phlegmatic, however - real hurricanes in bed.

Yellows love adventurers.

The blue color should alert initially: in front of you is either a representative of the orientation of the same name, or an incorrigible romantic.

Green color is loved by those who are in the Green Party, as well as by altruists and foresters.

Black socks are worn by men with a claim to taste, homely bachelors who wash their clothes once a month.

Orange, purple and scarlet colors are a sign of color blindness.

Gray and brown with a head betrays conservatives.

You have determined the color, now let's move on to the drawing.

Diamonds and geometric plexuses - in front of you is an intellectual, reflecting on the meaning of life.

Bunnies - mice clearly betray an infantile nature and a playboy (for the sake of curiosity, take a look at his underpants!)

Stripes - cells are to the liking of those who are clearly in trouble with the law or sadomasochists (possibly hidden ones).

And the last step, the most important: determine the hardness and odor of the object.

Socks "at attention" give out in a man the makings of an ascetic or a military man.

Smell is a tricky thing! Who knows what is on the mind of the owner of "thermonuclear socks" (you will lose consciousness from the unusual amber, and the peasant will pounce ...). And if the socks are fragrant, like flowers in spring, it is possible that their owner is capricious, narcissistic and no less insidious.

Socks in wool and smell like a cat, which means that your friend has a pet at home, which either often rubs against the owner's legs, or the owner often kicks the poor cat with his foot.

Thus, socks are the calling card of any man, and the information that lines on the hand and various tests can give you, in comparison with men's socks, is just baby talk.

Armed with such knowledge, you can accurately navigate the male whirlpool and unmistakably separate the “wheat from the chaff”.

And now let's complete the tasks and replenish the piggy bank:

Without hesitation, answer, what does your man prefer to sleep in?

If he sleeps mostly in shorts and a T-shirt, get him to dive into your bed in a state of “nude” in a month and sleep like that until morning.

Remember the socks with which pattern he likes, and which ones you bought him recently. Do your tastes match?

So, if you are well versed in such men's things as pajamas and socks, replenish the piggy bank with 50 points and take a pie from the shelf!

Before continuing the "military action" to capture a man, determine your "love diagnosis".

It is no secret that sometimes we ourselves drive ourselves into the trap of a destructive feeling, and see it too late. In order to avoid such disappointments, I offer a playful encyclopedia of "love sickness."

Love from A to Z.

What is she like? Mutual, unrequited, tragic or "like a lightning strike" ... It pushes people to exploits, and to crimes, turns everything "upside down", or "puts everything in its place." One thing is certain: a person in love changes unrecognizably (blooms, fades, withdraws into himself, takes off into the seventh heaven), depending on what love arrow Amur hit him with. Accordingly, everyone's love diagnosis is also different.

1. “Love is an iceberg” - the symptoms of this feeling are easy to recognize: your sweetheart (or you) opens partially, leaving your most unsightly flaws “under dark water”. I want to impress without any malicious intent, but it turns out that you are "putting a pig" on yourself.

2. “Love is a butterfly” is when you perceive feelings as something light and airy, as if you are expecting eternal summer. But at the first "frost" painfully "smack" on the ground. First, “byak-byak” with wings, then “shmyak-shmyak”.

3. "Love is a wave" - ​​it is contraindicated for those who are swayed. Up-down, high-low tide. That - "yes, I want", then - "no, I do not want." So a deceptive wave raises the "swimmers" to the crest, and then throws the "drowned" ashore.

4. “Love is burning” - in order for one to burn without ceasing, the other must, in the sweat of his brow, throw firewood into the firebox. Who do you want to be in this love? Of course, not with firewood ... but what if? "Where are the firewood from? From the heart, of course!

5. "Love is a gift" - it's good if it's a gift from God. One may think of himself as a gift, a kind of present - "I have a bow on the side." Then he demands to pay: “I gave you my best years!”. The owl handed the donkey Eeyore his own tail with the words, “I give you free of charge, that is, for free ...” But not myself ...

6. "Love is a hedgehog" - its symptom is suspicion and distrust. One made a mistake, the other - needles splayed, "do not touch me!" Okay, if there is a “hedgehog” character, but what if there are “hedgehog gloves” on your hands? Wounds are inevitable.

7. "Love - desire" - one wants and the other wants, but who fulfills something? The goldfish left the woman with nothing, but she only made three wishes. The recipe is simple: measure each other's desires and capabilities.

8. "Love is fun" - for those who have not played enough in childhood. "They dropped the bear on the floor, tore off the bear's paw." And what if instead of a plush animal, a gullible Mishka or a naive Mashka? They will leave you, even if "he is good."

9. "Love - starvation" - its symptoms are recognizable: one resists, the other "takes an impregnable fortress under siege." As the old song says - "you can't go anywhere, fall in love and get married, you'll still be mine!". The defeat is usually followed by the words - "So don't get you to anyone!"

10. "Love is a book" - for men, a woman, then - a closed book, then - read to the holes, then - read, but not interesting. Being a "book" is not so bad, the main thing is to choose the right genre and become multi-o-tomic.

11. "Love is a lollipop" - primarily affects lovers of sweet and sticky. Honey is also sweet, but, as you know, flies flock to it. And from sweet there is diathesis, when the body (read - the soul) itches and does not want to live.

12. “Love is a carrot” - and all that stuff ... The main thing is to rhyme! Everyone loves, but am I red? To say “I love you” is like sneezing, and there - be healthy, do not remember dashingly. Love is gone, tomatoes withered ...

13. "Love is opium" - for the people, of course. “I can’t live without him!”, “Without her, the world is not nice to me”, “He got into my soul” ... it’s good that he didn’t spit on her. Everyone can “get hooked on love”, but “jump off” without consequences ...

14. "Love is ashes" - hopeless, like autumn rain, walked without an umbrella - and hopelessly sick. And the rain is not a dream, not a spirit, that because of it you burned out in a hot delirium. Now you even admire the summer rain from the window. And in vain ...

15. "Love is paradise" - either an oasis or a mirage. Someday it will either melt away without a trace, or you, like Eve and Adam, will be lowered to the sinful earth ... yours.

16. "Love is a deal" - who said that bargaining is inappropriate here? If you want, pay in cash, or with tears in your pillow, or with loneliness. All rank by rank, you - to me, I - to you. And you can also love for love, here it’s how you bargain ...

17. “Love is awe” - naive to tears, but ... “Trembling doe”, “trepanation of the skull”, “shameless yap”. No matter how you twist it, there is only one root - “talk”. So he will tear his heart into pieces with innocent words, and only noodles on his ears.

18. “Love is already” - as in Russian: “already, married, unbearable” - an exception to the rule. A cunning snake slips out of your hands, even cry.

19. "Love is a wrapper" - especially for gullible simpletons. "Do you want candy? On the!" And instead of love - a lump of dirt. It looks like it in shape and color, but it tastes like “byaka” inedible. The brighter the wrapper, the more you believe.

20. "Love is halva" - he repeats to her (she - to him) "halva, halva ..." (I love, I love!), And in the mouth (in the soul) it is so sweet. And where is the halva? An, no!

21. "Love is the goal" - for snipers, definitely! Marfushenka - darling was tearing up - “I want love, I want a groom, I want!” ... and ended up in a puddle.

22. "Love is a watch" - a diagnosis of lovers of short novels. As in the song - "do not regret anything and love just like that." Without a soul and without a heart, but without disappointments.

23. "Love is an echo" - it is inherent in people who understand others perfectly. And what about those others? You told them - "Come to me!", And in response - "No!", To yours - "Do you love me?" You hear "Ouch!". I mean, what do you want!

24. "Love - I" is the safest and most mutual. Unfortunately, it is mainly men who “suffer” from it, and oh-oh-very few women love themselves. And in vain.

So, have you made your diagnosis? And, in order to sweeten the love “pill”, I propose to replenish the treasury of wisdom with cherished points. For example, 10 for each “diagnosed” on time. We managed to determine the “dummy”, recovered without loss - it means that you do not need wisdom. For which I love you!

And to make the lesson fun and better remembered, I turned it into a nice little game "Pick a melody". It's no secret that after talking with a man, any woman mentally (or in reality) sings a specific tune. For example, after a week of acquaintance with a boring subject who loves to teach, the song “don’t come near me, I’m offended ...” comes to mind, and any desire to do anything in the future disappears. But, as soon as a worthy candidate comes into view ...

So, the astrological art of seduction.

ARIES - "He would come up, I would turn away ..." and so on in the text. Only in this way can Aries be intrigued, he will not even smell easy prey. And if your independence is “seasoned” with high intelligence and a sense of humor, consider that half the battle is done. Lies, all kinds of advice and monotony are categorically contraindicated for him.

TAURUS - “My sun ...” there is such an old song about a flower that will wither away without this very sun. So it is with Taurus - flatter him without blushing, let him amuse his vanity ... Delve into everything that he likes, up to music and food. Get into his liver with your sensuality and - it's in the bag! About your past novels, keep quiet, like a partisan under interrogation - I don’t know anything, I don’t remember. In short - complete amnesia!

GEMINI - "Be with me a good boy, a stick and a carrot ..." Two-faced Janus, who can be pleased, except perhaps by bifurcating. One half does not know what the other will do. Seducing such a person is like taming the wind. If you have a rich imagination - go for it! Respond to coquetry with coquetry, and prudence with eccentricity. In short, as in the song - "Be or not be, do something!"

CANCER - “The most important thing is the weather in the house ...” You are a house bird, not a fluttering butterfly, you are the best cook in the world, the most patient of women, Mary Poppins and Aphrodite in one bottle. Spending money?! No no! Puritanism in bed? God forbid! If you want to check, dear Cancer - take me down the aisle ... And after all, it will lead, do not hesitate.

LEO - "My fish, I am your eye ...". However, forget the word “I”, use “you” more often in combination with the word “most”. Even walking down the street, keep one step behind. However, because of the broad back of Leo, you can secretly make eyes at men. Leo is delighted - everyone pays attention to you! You innocently pretend to be a sheep - they admire your masculinity, dear! Sometimes it's good to pull Leo's mustache, but don't get too carried away.

VIRGO - "And you are as cold as an iceberg in the ocean ...". Yes, you will have to become “icy” for some time and restrain your emotions. Now only a friend will have to lament over excess weight and other shortcomings, and then in a whisper. Learn to walk on tiptoe while Virgo works, even if his "titanic work" is contemplating the ceiling. And it is absolutely unaffordable luxury - to allow yourself to be naive and stupid.

LIBRA - “I can’t live a day without you ...” - sing these words to him from Monday to Friday. Then arrange a "time out" and analyze the situation - "is it worth continuing or not worth it." If there is no response, then it's a pipe! If Libra has shown interest, act decisively. By the way, he has a weak spot - this is art and a persistent allergy to spores. Press on the first, and do not touch the second. To enhance the impression, repeat from Monday to Friday, how cheerful and young he is, how much you appreciate his advice! By the weekend, feel free to look at the wedding dress in the salon.

SCORPIO - "Sim-Sim, open, Sim-Sim, surrender ...". Yes, with whom - a puritan, and with this - mysterious and liberated. But not obviously defiant, but still under a veil of mystery. You can’t lure him with one body, serve heartfelt conversations about ... sex for dessert. At the same time, hide your jealousy about and without. Play thriller, erotica, fantasy, but not melodrama. Never speak out about his sexual manners, unless you decide to end the affair.

SAGITTARIUS - "Nature does not have bad weather ..." Change like the weather, break all stereotypes, demonstrate your brightness and dynamism. He criticizes you directly in the forehead - do not care! Offers to remain friends - great! Hints at sex - with joy! Maybe you will not wait for declarations of love, but somehow imperceptibly, walking around the city, you will find yourself in front of the registry office. He - "maybe let's go ...". You are "why not...". Bang - and you're married!

CAPRICORN - “What a song without a button accordion, what a Marya without Ivan ...” So, everything is laid out on the shelves, everything is strictly according to plan. Today - a meeting, tomorrow - a kiss, a year later - a wedding. This "waiting" game can drag on, especially if your loved one is busy with a career. Just in case, learn how to do erotic massage, suddenly he will include it in his daily schedule with you in addition. But remember, marrying Capricorn, you marry all his relatives, for his career, punctuality and snobbery.

AQUARIUS - "Coachman, do not drive horses ...". He is cool and unemotional, and so are you. He has his own favorite thing, you have it in the same rhythm. For him, freedom is more important, you take a position of waiting, think over the tactics of seduction. He is not in a good mood - freeze and do not show that you are too passionate about him. When the moment comes, strike it down with intelligence.

FISH - “Musi-pusi, my dear ...” and so on without end. This is who you can show sentimentality with, drag all the homeless kittens into the house, play the naive girl and “hang noodles on your ears”. To convince him that you didn’t know any love before meeting him, that you “haven’t heard of sex” is a couple of trifles. Only with him did you find out that all this is just “musi-pusi”! He will lead you down the aisle, overwhelmed with pride that it was he who gave you true love!

Did my fun science help you? And I advise you to consolidate the material in practice: find a “seductive” motive for your loved one and do not miss the chance to replenish the piggy bank of wisdom.

Oh yes, I forgot about the main thing - 10 points for the motive. La-la-la!

For ladies who have carefully studied the methods of dealing with complexes, and have learned to give themselves the right setting for good luck, I offer a playful guide to winning men's hearts. What is needed for that?

To begin with, guess the riddle: "Every woman has a small, black, wrinkled one." Guessed? Well, of course. Zest. Exactly what distinguishes you from all other representatives of the female tribe. What you finally discovered in yourself, believed in your exclusivity and the ability to win in the difficult struggle for happiness.

Considering that every man has his own taste, then every “fisherman” (read - a woman) will find his own fish. There are several ways, and none is too complicated or tricky and is quite accessible to each of us.

Every angler dreams of catching the biggest fish at least once in his life, and for this he, sparing no time and money, buys fishing lines, hooks, mormyshkas.

What a beautiful word - “mormyshka”, for this alone I am ready to forgive the fans of fishing and pantries littered with all sorts of nonsense, and weekly absences on weekends. By the way, it is precisely on this occasion that most wives grumble, accusing their husbands of stupid waste of money, of wasting time, etc., etc. But here comes the cherished hour - a huge fat fish has pecked! And it's time for a man to triumph.

Dear ladies, rather than scolding poor fellow husbands for their "vicious passion" for how much in vain, isn't it better to adopt some of the subtleties of this curious occupation.

There is a reasonable grain in the actions of any angler - I mean that each fish has its own hook and its own bait. To be honest, even I, who are very far from the science of catching live bait, understand that it is impossible to pick up both pike and crucian with one bait. At its core, we women are the same fishermen, and men are our cherished catch. For me personally, such a catch appears in the form of royal trout.

So, there is a desire, but something is missing in the arsenal of each of us, then the figure does not shine, then the face is so-so ... And yet everyone has at least one advantage, this very “mormyshka” is a bait, that's it we will wave in front of the nose of the "fish".

"Karas" is a lazy domestic fish that loves comfort and delicious food. If you are the owner of a round figure, rosy cheeks and skillful hands, then feel free to flaunt this particular “combat arsenal”. Coquettishly demonstrate a magnificent bust, dimples on your cheeks and, under no pretext, start talking about diets.

"Roach" is a nimble fidget athlete who appreciates in a woman not so much grace as liveliness. If you have a figure of a teenager, if you are easy-going and have a sense of humor, then you have a fishing rod in your hands. Tight trousers, ringing bracelets on thin wrists, a stylish haircut and everything that emphasizes your mobile lifestyle can serve as a “mormyshka”.

"Catfish" is a bit of a predator, a bit of a goof, but prefers to "catch on a hook" of an elegant "starlet". It is better to lure him with long legs, long blond curls and long well-groomed nails. But the skirt, on the contrary, is shorter, cosmetics in moderation, and even less jewelry. "Catfish" loves natural beauty and cannot stand falsehood. Including in behavior.

"Sturgeon" - purposeful, noble, "spawns" in front of women who prefer a career and are not without ambition. Strictness in everything is his motto, so a business suit, your ability to soberly assess the situation and keep up the conversation will serve as a “hook”. Tastefully selected jewelry will emphasize your femininity and divert his attention from the small flaws in your appearance.

Burbot is a cunning enterprising snob, greedy for everything bright and shiny. You just have to live up to his ideal and play the role of a lady from a secular society. Surround yourself with an aura of mystery, a bunch of pretty little trinkets, flirt, act up and demonstrate your helplessness. As a rule, appearance does not matter to him, it is successfully replaced by scenery and your actions.

"Bleak" is a cheerful, careless playboy, an eternal boy. He just needs to find a “mormyshka-mom”, so he doesn’t peck at women with skinny forms. It is easy to lure him with a deep neckline, intimate conversations and ... severity. A woman's body should be soft, but not her character. Achieve grace not in clothes, but in posture and in the ability to keep the brand.

"Trout" is a gentleman in everything. Sincere and demands the same in relation to himself. With any appearance, be just a lady, even if this role is given to you with difficulty. The "catch" is worth it, take my word for it. Be natural, but with a touch of aristocracy. After all, even a bag of potatoes can be worn like an expensive dress if your goal is to get the royal "Trout".

There are many more different "fish" that "swim" in whole schools right under our noses. Some need to be baited, others need to be lured into the net, and someone has to be “filled up” with a harpoon, here, how lucky. Only a patient and smart fisherman will take home the long-awaited catch.

And those who claim that without fish and cancer are fish, they will get cancer.

And now, dear ladies, we will not consider men as a whole, but we will thoroughly study each individually. Fortunately, there is astrology for this, which will allow you to find out the "zodiacal" features of individual individuals.

So, the desired prince appeared on the horizon, and the question arose before you: “How to lure a man into the house?”

Any single woman dreams that her beloved man not only “flies” into her cozy nest, but also stays in it forever. Only here it is sometimes not possible to drag a potential groom “to the light” after the first visit. He resists, but does not want to explain the reason. And the reason is trifling - in your house he is not at ease. I learned a long time ago that you need to select a pair according to the “key-lock” principle, and the interior of your apartment plays an important role in the process of “luring”.

Let's say your sweetheart is an Aries. He loves to work and knows how to relax. And if in a secluded corner he finds a box with tools, then your current taps, “snotty” sockets and hanging cabinet doors will be in “full openwork”. Well, after that, of course, he should be rewarded with a romantic evening by candlelight.

"Taurus" is a little lazy, and God bless him (later you will save him from this vice), but he is a big lover of comfort. Create a paradise for relaxation: a landscape on the wall, a soft blanket, lots of pillows on HIS sofa. Well, where else will he meet such understanding and such comfort? Only you!

The contact "Gemini" constantly needs to be in touch with the outside world, so do not blow your lips, but helpfully put it on the coffee table, mobile phone, telephone directory (for solidity) and smile, smile while he answers endless calls (you will have time to remember this to him later ). A comfortable chair on wheels, called "his throne" will firmly tie the sweetheart to your home.

Is your chosen one Cancer? You are fabulously lucky, because this specimen considers the kitchen a place of rest. Oh, here you have no equal: cute trinkets, elegant napkins, “pigtails” of onions - everything is in his taste. Even if you hate to spend more than one minute in the kitchen, relax! Be comforted by the thought that after the wedding, the kitchen will become HIS office.

Even if you live modestly, to lure the "Lion" purchase a classic service with gilding. He likes to "splurge" numerous guests, whom he wants to receive, of course, with you. To make this "cute" habit a family tradition, always greet Leo like an important person - with style! Get even later when he turns into a tame lion cub.

When inviting Virgo to the house, unobtrusively demonstrate your stocks of food (preferably pickles and jams), then let him rest in an easy chair with a newspaper in his hands. Make sure that there is not a speck of dust or a speck in the corners, so that you are always “at the parade”, so that an economical but healthy dinner is on the table.

The Libra man will begin to evaluate your nest right from the hallway. Why not please a good person? “Oh, you have such a mirror, and a rug, and a nice lamp, and even a mini-garden! Everyone, I'm staying!" And, if further he discovers a small aquarium, bookshelves and a music center with a rich music library, he will certainly ask for a visit again.

"Scorpio" will be pleasantly surprised if you create conditions for him to be creative. What does he do there in his spare time: philately, origami, straw weaving? Doesn't matter! Keep, as relics, all his souvenirs (even if their place is in a garbage can), praise his imagination, and Scorpio will understand that only in this house they understand him.

"Sagittarius" will not get through comfort, give him space. Down with everything superfluous! What is more important to you - old furniture or a new husband? In a conspicuous place - your photos in stylish frames, exotic souvenirs from distant countries (from a nearby store) and, as an incentive, one expensive trifle, for example, a simulator. Will Sagittarius resist such a temptation?

Throw the bait to Capricorn that you dream of equipping a small office, but you need his advice. Is this table suitable, which chair is more comfortable, have you prepared all the writing materials? If you (or rather, he) does not need an office, decorate any room in the house (even a toilet), most importantly, with its help. In the end, the sweetheart will get used to the idea that this is his toilet and will want to visit this place every day. Of course, it is better if it is a bedroom, but you can’t be so frank.

“Aquarius” stun with a stream of light and air. Open the windows as much as possible: light curtains, transparent tulle, “hangings” cutely ringing from the wind. In the bathroom - shower gels, various foams, and everything that pleases the eye of a lover of water procedures. And if you have an air ionizer (in extreme cases, a good freshener), then the climate of your nest will seem like paradise to him.

For "Fish" do not be shy, prepare a bedroom. In order not to frighten him, you need soft light, all sorts of feminine little things, lace and frills. If he is not a complete idiot, he will understand how thin and vulnerable you are. I bet he's going to want to take care of you for the rest of his life. In short, he will not dare to leave you to the mercy of fate. Yes, and your bedroom is so cozy ... like a quiet backwater for a fish.

Recently, the "pickup" (which in English means "cling") has become popular among men. In general terms, the technology of this process is familiar to everyone, and everything would be fine if not for one “but” ... Men were so carried away by this pickup truck that they crossed all boundaries. They even came up with their own male sport, and they compete among themselves who will “pick up” more women in a short period of time.

I don’t know how the catch is calculated, but one thing pleases me - the pickup truck has not yet entered the Olympic sport. So, dear ladies, we have time to prepare and give a fitting rebuff to the men. I propose to create your own team and start an operation called "Wagtails".

For reference: a wagtail is a female person who shakes the goose of strong representatives of the human race.

The essence of sport is to shake everything we need out of the object.

Any man can become a “guz”, even the most fluffy one will do for something.

To begin with, let's clarify to ourselves what we are going to shake from the "guz"? Money, help around the house, fun sex... yes, and you also need to be able to shake it out. Or you can use one object as bait for another, more desirable one.

If you urgently need to improve your financial situation, with a tenacious glance, figure out the golden lion from the crowd. Safari starts! Taming a lion is a delicate matter and does not tolerate fuss. Flattery, small souvenirs with a hint, flirtatious flirting will do. Do not give into hands, he is a hunter, which means that he will simply gobble up easy prey. As soon as you start receiving signs of attention in the form of an expensive outfit or an elegant handbag - that's it, the client is ripe! Ramp up wisely and remember: begging and shaking are two different things. If everything is done correctly, then a fur coat and a ring with a diamond are provided to you.

The apartment needs repairs, the tap is leaking, the TV is covered? You can, of course, call the master, but what kind of wagtail are you after that? There is a "guz" with golden hands, not a handsome man, not a rich man, so that's not what you need from him.

Forget coquetry, slightly change the direction of flattery, and remember that you are a domestic cat. Praise his ability to deftly handle a hammer, you can cry a little bit that you don’t have a miracle master at your side. Treat the “guz” with pies, sew a button to his shirt. Yes, he’s for this button to you ... No, you don’t need to pull him into bed, just hint vaguely: “Of course, I’m a decent woman, but ...”

By the way, about sex. We shake this "guz" from those who can take you to the seventh heaven of pleasures, but nothing less. Otherwise, the game is not worth the candle. You are not going to marry him, so why not please yourself if the object is experienced and passionate?

Do you want to get that charmer over there? No problem! Find out where and when he walks, and start acting. Not paying attention? Information for reflection: men are herd individuals, and if a crowd of admirers winds around you, a charmer will be drawn into this crowd with a magnet. And, if you walk alone, no one pecks at you, then the charmer doesn’t need you for nothing.

So, you need a bait in the form of a cute, but not very smart "goose". From it we shake maximum concern for our person in full view of the “honey-object”, we accept signs of attention with a languid face, periodically throwing bored glances at the “honey”: “Like, you see who I am dealing with?” After a couple of days, the object will be curious - "and who is it that misses next to the jerk?"

And he wants to cheer you up ... The bait, of course, will be offended, but you have already shaken everything that was required out of it, and got what the performance was started for.

And now we fix the material:

If you want to be a wagtail, learn two things: there are no men who are useless, and there are no men who have nothing to shake out of.

Set a specific goal - what are we shaking from the "guz", and act without fuss. Shake, but do not beg! Let the goose bring everything on a silver platter.

You are a wagtail, an innocent, slightly eccentric creature, moderately flirtatious and insidious. They are mysterious and elusive, it seems, and you distribute advances, but you don’t give them into your hands.

So, if you have learned the essence of the process, it's time to move on to the habits that distinguish the "wagtail" from other birds.

But first, a story about a wise wagtail who got out of a difficult situation not only without losing her feathers, but also grabbing the coveted “goose”.

This woman suffered a lot in her time from pick-ups, so with a clear conscience she joined the ranks of the wagtails. And, really, rather than waiting for mercy from nature (or men), it is better to take what you need yourself, while showing ingenuity, imagination and perseverance. Is it so bad to "shake the goose"? Isn't that what we do all the time, courting lovers, husbands, boyfriends? For a real woman, "shaking" is a natural process, but there are individuals who act rudely, using forbidden tricks. Worst of all, these "Witches", "Hysterics" and "Ultiguzzes" are shaking their own sisters, that is, you and me.

For reference: "hysterics" - they do not know how to wait for the right moment, they do not have enough imagination, so the monster bird descends to tears and screams. She will win the victory, do not doubt it, but the joy of victory will not be the same. To be honest, when they give in to you, clenching their teeth, the cherished “guz” does not warm the soul, and most importantly, relations with a man deteriorate.

"Ultiguzzka" acts no less vilely, descending to an ultimatum. Who likes to be cornered? The ultimatum will work, but it will not be possible to “shake out” something from this “guz” a second time.

"Witches" also think of themselves as wagtails, they get their way by declaring a boycott, go ahead, like a waiter who serves himself. And some people descend to petty blackmail ...

That's what my story is about.

"Wagtail" and "Stervitsa" worked in the same company, they were not friends, but they knew everything about each other. Only the first one pretended not to notice anything, and the second figured out how to use the information?

I must say that Wagtail, although she was married, had a light romance with her boss. Well, she was pretty, men looked at her, which cannot be said about Stervitsa. Either out of envy, or for moral reasons, Stervitsa ambushed when the doves retired to the chief's office, and locked them there.

It was Friday evening, there were no witnesses. The demands, like a ransom for silence, were put forward by Stervica, unthinkable: “You, dear boss, give me a burning ticket to Italy, and the wagtail - his position in the department you know. And so that everything happens without cheating, write an order right now and slip it under the door to me.

The boss, like a real man, decided not to take risks, and fulfilled the requirements. A cunning bird with a satisfied look flew off to warm lands ...

Ha! She did not know with whom she was dealing, and that no one could offend a wagtail with impunity.

What is our smart girl doing? She tells her husband the story about an envious rival who found out that the boss wants to promote the wagtail in the position.

The husband, struck to the core by the vile blackmail and the stain that has fallen on the reputation of his holy wife, calls the boss.

The chief confirms everything, but assures that the misunderstanding has been settled, the bitch has already been fired, and the wagtail will receive compensation and, of course, a new position.

The chef's wife, listening to all the "cheese-boron", is finally convinced of the innocence of her husband, and offers to take the wagtail's husband to the vacant position. Let's give credit to her desire to insure.

From a seemingly peak situation, the wagtail came out the winner. Everyone was happy, except for the bitch, of course. After returning, a surprise awaited her in the form of an order to dismiss her for ... however, the wording was legally correct. The bitch shouted that she would bring everyone to clean water, but no one listened to her.

So, dear ladies, if you wish to extricate yourself from delicate situations just as deftly, then further information will be useful to you.

The first situation is “emphasis on compassion”.

How do funny kittens and playful puppies make you feel? Tenderness ... I want to stroke them, take them in my arms, treat them delicious.

What about a crying child or a wounded bird? Sympathy ... Do not pass by, you will regret it, you will provide assistance.

Here are the men (pick-up artists, by the way, too) by nature, humane, sincere people, they will do the same. It would never occur to them that all this is the usual tricks of the wagtail. The man was looking for another "target", and here - a defenseless creature.

“Let me help you,” thought the little man, and got stuck. Most likely, he will not realize that you are already “shaking” him. And when he realizes, it's too late, my friend, sailed!

The second situation is “convergence of interests”.

How do you feel about fishing, football and cars? You do not respect, but in vain ... Because men cannot live without it. Nothing brings people together like common hobbies. Will they ignore a woman who is super tech savvy, doesn't talk nonstop about clothes and diets, whines on the arm and jumps on the table when she sees a mouse? Already breathtaking, how different it is from the rest!

Are you following my progress? This is another trick of the many-sided wagtail: a man is indifferent to birds, he is allergic to cats, and you won’t break him with a tear, which means we use “rapprochement by interests”. When a man begins to see clearly, the trap will already slam shut.

Do you feel sorry for men and condemn wagtails? But what about pick-up artists with their "track record", which is replenished with OUR names? Yes, after such a lesson, he will walk with caution, and in any woman he will see a wagtail.

Let's move on to the golden rule of the wagtail - "an object that is won with difficulty and invested in is abandoned with reluctance." The object is you and me.

Remember how Scheherazade acted? She told the Sultan her amazing tales, breaking them off at the most interesting place. Why do you think? Yes, because the man was languishing with curiosity, waiting to continue!

When communicating with a man, forget the words "yes" and "no". Light flirting instead of affectation, a little coquetry instead of outright sex appeal, "maybe ..." and "I can't promise, maybe ..." with a meaningful pause at the end.

This pause is the tale of Scheherazade.

When it comes to you, loved ones, then words like “always” and “never” should sound more often. Imagine the reaction of a man when you confess: “I have always been successful with men, but I never thought about marriage.” He will not be able to eat out of curiosity - “is this really so?” And he will certainly want to check.

Another tip for wagtails: as soon as you feel that the case smells of “probros”, it is better to do it first. Leaving a man with a nose is much more pleasant than licking your wounds. Sometimes the trick works so much that the man comes back to ... listen to your fairy tale.

But, if you missed the moment, do not worry. There is a great way to “pull the blanket over yourself” and remember the cherished words “always” and “never”. Tell everyone in a row: "I'm always the first to end a relationship and never hang on a man's neck." As a rule, there are well-wishers who will pass on information to “your ex”. I know from personal experience that men are so offended by this phrase that they ... return to clarify the situation.

And you know everything, repeat your own, you look, and you yourself believe that it is you, and not he you.

And if you whine at all corners and curse the offender, you will play into his hands. Do you need it?

So, we learned how to “shake the goose”, tell the tales of Scheherazade, now let's talk about how to behave on his territory.

Remember that the winner is the one who knows how to scroll the situation a few moves ahead.

Let's say, after a little “breaking” for decency, you give the go-ahead and cross the threshold of his bachelor lair.

Get ready, traps await you here! Do not even hope that the man called you to have fun together. They are also quite insidious and know how to arrange checks. So, you cross its threshold ...

"Fathers!" - you grab your head, and then - a broom. The impulse is understandable, I myself got hooked for the first time, and wanted to show myself in all its glory (the hostess, the clean one, etc.) And what kind of wagtail are you after that, if you didn’t see the catch? After all, the man was waiting for just such actions and gloatingly rubs his hands, “Yeah, he’s already putting things in order, and what’s next? Decided to lasso me!”

So, immediately confuse him: she entered and gasped from the threshold “How cute you are ...”. And then coquettishly, - “Where do you have ...” and be silent for a bit.

“Broom?” the man will start up, still hoping to catch you red-handed. “Kitchen?” - he does not let up, not yet understanding with whom he is dealing.

- "Mirror ..." - fold your lips in a bow, and carelessly move your shoulder, they say, your mess does not excite me.

If a man managed to lure you into the kitchen, immediately state that your principle is not to host on male territory, but ... for him, so be it, you will make an exception.

Naturally, your hands will itch with the desire to "make a grand show", but you did not come for this, in the first place. And secondly, is THIS man worthy of your efforts? If you dream of staying here forever as a mistress, then you will have time to show your talents another time, and today your zeal will be regarded as an encroachment on freedom.

A wise woman does not deceive herself with hope: here, I will show him how good I am, and he will marry me! A wise woman knows that the main thing is not to scare a man, otherwise you will no longer be invited, or invited for one purpose. No, not for sex, for… cleaning.

Do not forget that God gave the woman cunning for a reason.

By the way, when inviting a man to your place, you don’t have to be too zealous either. What do stupid women do? They lick the corners, prepare pickles, set the table, and only then put on a “marafet”. There is usually not enough time for this.

And how does the "Wagtail" act? She will clean her feathers, sharpen her beak, prepare an intimate corner. This wise bird knows that a man comes to see her, to have a great time in the company of a cheerful and rested lady.

In short, wagtails, it’s not for me to teach you how to “smother” and “show dust in your eyes.” And there is no need for remorse, you are not deceiving anyone, you are not misleading. You simply lull the vigilance of a man and give him the opportunity to consider his happiness.

If, after everything I've taught you, the man of your dreams doesn't propose to you, then either you're not a wagtail, or you've got a complete idiot.

Some of you may think that I've gone crazy. And you imagine an annoying gentleman who haunts you from morning to night, his dull face and dreary "hello, it's me again ...".

It’s scary to imagine that this particular bore once won your heart, and you (oh, horror!) Almost made a terrible mistake by agreeing to think about his marriage proposal.

Yes, at first the man was handsome, even sweet at times, but you can’t command your heart. And then it turned out that you have completely opposite views, tastes, and in general, you love men, and he loves women. Of course, this is a joke, but only the most unpleasant situation has developed, so you have to approach it with humor.

I feel sorry for the man, no one argues, you are even ready to remain friends if he stops chasing you and talking about love. There is no need to shout to the poor fellow in the face that he has no pride, that one cannot humiliate himself either in front of a friend or in front of a beloved woman. But your patience is running out, and he seems to have a second wind: he calls at night and stands under the windows.

You are not cruel, you just do not like and that's it. Then, without pity, drive the annoying admirer in the neck, without wasting energy on meaningless conversations. No concessions like: "one last time", "give me time to think." Guilt is superfluous here, and his problem should not worry you. Is it reasonable to marry him only out of compassion?

The second situation is no less delicate. He is not a fan for you, but just a friend who will always come to the rescue in difficult times. Such charming, cheerful, knows everything, knows a lot. And how quickly he fixed your TV! Someone will be lucky with her husband ... But not for you, because in this role you simply cannot imagine him.

Don't expect a man to share your position. Perhaps he dreams of a wedding no more than yours, but he has already signed himself up as a fan. By the way, with far-reaching intentions. Well, you understand...

A friend turns into a real terrorist, and your quiet life into a nightmarish existence. Reproaches that you respond with black ingratitude to his help, pass on deaf ears. And it’s better to end the relationship altogether, refuse “disinterested” services, or (if you are so attached to this person) learn to “pay with the same coin”: bake a friend a pie, get him a football ticket, give him a shirt. And hint that you have a man whom you love madly, but rather introduce a friend to the "groom".

Say more often how happy you are, how lucky you are that you have a friend with whom you can chat so easily. Does not work? There is only one way out: directly declare that you are breaking off the relationship, and there is no point in pursuing you.

Situation three. The fan does not want to accept your refusal and threatens to jump off the roof, drown himself and hang himself at the same time. “What the hell is kidding” - you think and yield to the blackmailer. Such men carry out their threat extremely rarely, and even then only half. They can use a blade through the veins, and a farewell note for pills ... But for some reason, before an act of suicide on the basis of unrequited love, they insure themselves. They call an ambulance in advance, flood the neighbors, resort to clever tricks and manage to save them.

In short, all this nonsense in the name of high love for you resembles a bad performance and is calculated on the fact that you, suffering from a sense of guilt, will return. Perhaps the stake is also placed on your female credulity: flattered by the fact that a man dies from love for her, the woman capitulates.

How to stop harassment? Make a pen and leave - this is the time.

To insist that he is a strong and persistent man and will definitely overcome his painful passion for you (and at the same time for acts of suicide). Even if you hate to think of him as a man, call him macho, superman and superman. Having believed in his own masculinity, the admirer will leave you behind and in a month ... will be comforted in the arms of another woman.

These ways of parting with boring gentlemen are perhaps the most humane. And there are others designed for record-breaking short periods.

A disgusted fan can be called ten times a day and three times a night to ask archival questions: “what are you doing, honey?”, “Do you think about me? And what?"

Call him at work and demand: "Tell me how you love me."

In the most intimate moments, recall aloud former lovers, preferably in detail, not sparing colors.

From time to time, squeamishly evaluate his friends and, in general, all men. At the same time, openly state that you do not intend to do laundry, cook, or give birth to children.

Tantrums should be thrown more often and for any reason: I forgot to call, I came without flowers, I took me to the wrong restaurant. Brought flowers - it means not the ones you are allergic to from these. Called - it means not on time, and in general, he could have come, but not called.

Drag him around the shops, demand gifts, flirt with men in front of him ...

Two months have passed, and the disgusted gentleman still accompanies you by the arm? And you don't like this sweetie?!

So you either have a perverted taste, or you yourself do not know what you want.

Well, in the next chapter we will talk about more serious things, and now I bring to your attention a playful rhyme about a picky lady. So, on topic...

Everyone told me - listen!
It's time to think about your husband.
Being picky is not the point
So you will wither an old maid!
The shade took care of me...
I laughed - not my hero!
He is small in stature and not smart,
Plus, he's just a postman.
He called me Juliet
He took me to the cinema, gave me candy.
But I got bored after a month.
Romeo's innocent love.
The brunette took care of me,
And I answered - neither "yes" nor "no".
He called me, wrote poetry,
He wore an armful of cornflowers.
He called me "Your Majesty"...
But he was a brunette student and a beggar.
I may be stupid, but still,
I also banished the brunette.
The blond took care of me.
He took me to the ballet.
He was an artist from God
But he made some money.
Called me Madonna
He painted portraits and suffered.
I told him "no".
The blond man left, the portrait was burned ...
Oh how easily I forgot
The men she played with!
Oh how many hearts I have broken
I don't remember, I guess.
I have a broken trough
And so she remained an old maid.