How to completely change. How to change your life for the better once and for all

14.10.2019

How to change yourself? If you are asking this question, it means that you are already a very mature person. People are more likely to ask the question of how to change other people or circumstances.

Adult only and man of sense understands that any changes in life begin with changes in oneself.

It is truly fortunate to understand that managing the circumstances of your life begins with changing yourself.

How to start changing

We set goals

Changing yourself is a worthy decision. But where to start? Before you change yourself, you need to understand exactly what goals you are striving for. What do you want to see as a result of your changes? After all, you can spend a lot of effort, and then be dissatisfied with the result.

The goals that may require changes are very different, for example:

Make an amazing career.
To start a family.
Find health and beauty.
Achieve a high position in society.
Create sources of passive income.

But it must be borne in mind that in order to achieve a particular goal, certain qualities will be required:

For example, the qualities needed in order to create a family for a woman: kindness, tenderness, desire to take care of children, meekness, obedience, fidelity, devotion. And if a girl sets herself the goal of creating a family, then it will be beneficial for her to change and develop precisely these qualities.
If the goal is to build a career, other qualities will be needed, such as determination, assertiveness, determination, strength.
Of course, you can develop all the qualities in yourself a little bit with an indefinite purpose. But with this approach, attempts to change are likely to quickly come to a standstill. Since actions in the absence of a goal do not bring much satisfaction, therefore it is lost to move on.

Therefore, it is very important, before you start to change, to set a goal. Just “I want to change” is not enough to transform yourself. Change starts with choosing a goal. This is the answer to the question: “Where to start transforming yourself?”

Finding role models

The next step in changing yourself is to find people who have already achieved similar goals.

Knowing the end point you want to get to, you can try to find your own path. But one must understand that such a search takes long time and often leads to nothing. Sometimes it's like trying to invent your own script and language.

It is much easier to study the examples of the development of those people who were in a similar situation and were able to change it. It is very important that they be able to overcome it successfully. It is desirable to take an example not one or two.

BIOGRAPHIES OF SUCCESSFUL PEOPLE

What can be taken as an example? An excellent option - biographies. , in one area or another, sometimes they write books about how they overcame difficulties, how they changed.

Reading biographical books helps to identify personality traits that contributed to the achievement of intended goals through change. Choose books whose authors can confidently say: "I changed myself completely and got decent results."

PEOPLE AROUND YOU

Sometimes examples can be seen in life. For example, a friend who did not have a personal life for a long time, but then she changed herself and found family happiness.

Or a colleague who at first held a minor position, but then. Watch people succeed in getting what they want. Point out their qualities, feel free to ask for advice.

LECTURES, TRAININGS

Listening to lectures and attending trainings is also a good option to meet the right people. Sometimes the leader of such trainings is a successful person who is ready to share his experience on how to change. And in the past has gone through great changes.

PSYCHOLOGICAL LITERATURE

Reading helps you change yourself. However, not all books will be useful.

Therefore, study the reviews and try to learn as much as possible about the life of the author. Not all authors of psychological literature deserve to be an example of how to change.

RELIGION

If faith is not unacceptable to you, then you can read or listen to lectures of clergymen. Among them, there are often people who have the knowledge of how to completely change and are good examples to emulate.

Learning from someone else's experience

The next step in self-improvement will be to study the experiences of people who have been able to change the course of their lives. By studying their experience, you can systematize it and understand how to change in order to become like them and achieve goals.

Read books, attend trainings, study biographies, collect as much information as possible from other people's experiences on how to change yourself.

Do not rush into the pool with your head. At first, some things may not be understood. That is, there will be no understanding of why this or that thing needs to be done, how to apply it and why it is needed. Do not write off, gradually introduce into your life what is close and understandable.

For example, if you decide to become a leading person, then starting it right away from Monday, by Tuesday next week there is a big chance to drop it.
Why? Because with the advent of the thought “I want to change,” a person rushes to change everything at once. That is, a new follower healthy lifestyle life begins to get up at 6 in the morning, do exercises, eat vegetables and fruits, instead of the usual dumplings, quit smoking and skip drinking alcohol at the next birthday.
As a result, after a few days or weeks, this lifestyle becomes unbearable. The person returns to his old habits. Question: How to change? now he cares much less, there is a feeling of disgust for the changes.
Studying someone else's experience, join it gradually, with understanding. If you are going to get up early, get up 30 minutes earlier tomorrow. Three or four days later for another 10 minutes. Gradually bring the rise time to the desired. It should become a habit, not a violence against oneself. And before doing something, it is very important to understand why you need it.

Where to look for support and how to stay motivated

When deciding how to change yourself, it is very important to remember that motivation and a strong desire to change are essential companions of progress.

Naturally, the desire to change will rise and fall over time. Sooner or later, the first fuse will pass, motivation will begin to decrease. There will definitely be situations on the path of change when it seems that there is no progress.

There will be situations when it seems that the changes are going completely in the wrong direction, that they do not bring you closer to your goals. Sometimes there may be a strong desire to give up everything and return to what it was.

But remember to say the phrase: "I changed myself completely, I succeeded!" only those who nevertheless reached the end, those who coped with all the difficulties, experienced difficult moments and those who did not give up, can do it.

To cope with difficult situations that arise along the path of change, create conditions for yourself that help you not to quit what you started. What are these conditions?

The right attitude to failure

There will undoubtedly be successes and failures in the process of change. It's important to deal with failure the right way. You don't have to beat yourself up for every mistake.

Failure is good too. Because it provides food for thought and analysis. It helps you understand your mistakes and not make them in the future.

If you are not mistaken, then you most likely do not study. Each miss is fraught with an equal or even greater opportunity. Learn to see opportunities and lessons in failure.

Environment for change

Without good environment that divides your goals, it will be impossible to change. There are no people who never have doubts. There are very few people who can resist the pressure of others for a long time. In order to survive periods of doubt, rejection of society, it is necessary to have the support of like-minded people.

It doesn't have to be many, but there should be at least one. Since it is the support of someone who shares your aspirations and beliefs that can change everything.

Change progress tracking

Motivation is lost due to the inability to feel progress. The solution in this case will be - a diary or any other way of fixing the current state.
Go back from time to time to old notes about yourself to see that changes are still taking place.

Possible obstacles

Often a person who declares: “I want to change” and starts moving in this direction is perceived by others with hostility.

Do not worry, with the question: "How to change if others do not support me?" each one that decides to go its own way, to change and develop, faces.

Environment that hinders change

For example, someone in the company has stopped drinking and is no longer drinking alcohol. Usually such statements cause a strong reaction. Because you can't just stop drinking. This requires a very good reason, for example, illness or pregnancy. Otherwise it is impossible.

People around you are usually afraid of change, they do not share your desire to change. Perhaps if you do not go astray and reach good results over time, these same people will wonder how to change themselves.

But for now, they will most likely react negatively or warily.

Personality traits that prevent change

In addition to people, character traits such as laziness, fear, and indecision hinder changes. Old favorite habits also slow down progress:

For example, a person takes care of his health, masters healthy diet, physical exercise. But then laziness and old habits begin their attack. Eat delicious in the evening, skip a workout.
Drive such desires away. Create conditions in which bad habits and character traits will be difficult to manifest. Then, over time, you will happily say, “I have completely changed myself.”

If you have a desire to change your appearance, know that you are not alone in this. This is quite normal for a very large number of people, especially young women. Most likely, you are already beautiful, you just don’t understand it yet. If you learn more confidence and change your appearance to one that best suits your inner self, you can feel completely different and believe in your own beauty!

Steps

Part 1

Personal care

Drink enough water. Drinking enough water helps keep you focused and energized, and it will also help you burn off steam. extra pounds. To calculate the amount of water you need daily, you need to remember that for every kilogram of your weight you need to consume at least 30 ml of water.

Eat right. Avoid excess sugar, salt, and highly processed foods. Your diet should include the following items.

Squirrels. Healthy protein sources include fish, white meat, legumes, nuts, and eggs.
Healthy fats. Nuts (especially almonds), vegetable oils ( great option is extra virgin olive oil) and fatty vegetables like avocados are an excellent source of healthy fats.
Whole unprocessed carbohydrates. These include fruits, vegetables, whole grains, and legumes.
Vitamins and minerals. They can be taken as supplements if you know your diet is not providing you with all the vitamins and minerals you need.

Listen to your own body. Drink when you are thirsty and eat when you are hungry. It may take some time to learn to listen to your body signals if you haven't paid attention to them before, but once you get the hang of it, it will become easier for you to stick to it. healthy diet and you might even lose some weight.
- If you ate or drank something that made you headache or malaise, take note of this and try not to use this product in the future, especially if it causes discomfort on a regular basis.
- Notice what foods and drinks make you feel good. Eating a clean diet with enough water and essential nutrients will help you become a healthier and happier person. When you feel healthier and happier, then at the same time you will feel a sense of your own beauty.
Maintain hygiene. Wash and moisturize your face and brush your teeth twice a day. Shower at least every other day and wash your hair when your hair starts to get greasy (this may be required every other day or once a week, as it all depends on the type of hair).
- If you have acne on your face or back, you may need to wash your hair more often, as oils from your hair can be transferred to your face, neck, and back, causing acne.
- To keep your teeth healthy and strong, you should visit your dentist every six months.
- Maintaining hygiene will help you feel fresh and attractive every day. Try to pay attention to yourself every day, even if you are not in the mood.
Keep a diary daily. Regular journaling can reduce anxiety, stress, and depression. This helps to analyze problems and strengthen self-esteem. Try to devote 20 minutes a day to your diary.
- Keep a diary, even if you have nothing to say. You can write that you have nothing to say and see where this thought takes you further. Often something immediately pops up in memory, sometimes it even turns out to be something unexpected.
Be an optimist. Most people have an inner voice that often sees the bad in everything and says that a person is not good enough at something. You can fight this with a grateful attitude to fate and the release of positive aspects what is happening.

Smile. Research has shown that the happier you look, the more attractive you are to other people. In addition, according to research, even in moments of sadness, smiling can lift your spirits.
- If you're upset, try smiling for 30 seconds to cheer yourself up.
Be sure. Gaining self-confidence is easier said than done, however, it is worth working on. Having good self-esteem will make you healthier and happier, which will automatically make you more attractive.

Get enough sleep. If you don't get enough sleep, your brain won't work at full efficiency and you'll have trouble eating a healthy diet, getting physical activity as well as maintaining a positive attitude and self-confidence.

Part 2
Hairstyle change
1. Cut and/or color your hair. Whether new haircut or dyeing your hair a different color, changing the look of your hair can drastically affect your overall appearance. Think about hairstyles and hair colors that suit you best.
  - Ask yourself what does your hair say about you? Are you sociable and like to take risks? In this case, maybe you will like a short haircut and multi-colored hair. Are you a more down to earth person and a bit of a hippie? You can go for natural colors and long layered haircuts.
  - Look through hair magazines or search the Internet to find out what hairstyles you like. Hair magazines and books are available at most bookstores.
2. Determine your face type. When changing hairstyles, it is important to consider the shape of the face. Faces are of several types. One way to determine your face type is to trace the contours of its reflection in the mirror with lipstick or eyeliner.
  - Oval faces look balanced and are widest at the center.
  - Square faces have the same width at the eyebrows, cheeks, and jaw.
  - Triangular faces are widened at the bottom and have a prominent jawline.
  - Heart-shaped faces (in the shape of an inverted triangle) have a small chin and wide cheekbones.
  - Round faces look like a fairly regular circle.
  - Diamond-shaped faces are slightly angular and wider at the cheekbones than at the eyebrows and jaws.
  - Elongated faces are almost the same width from forehead to jaw, which makes them look longer.
3. Determine which hairstyle best suits your face type. To make your hair look its best, choose a hairstyle based on your face type.
  - Most haircuts suit oval faces, however, hairstyles that emphasize length can make the face appear elongated.
  - Square faces look best with hair length below the jaw line. The owners of such faces should especially avoid such haircuts in which the hair ends at the jaw line, as this makes the face even more square. It is also necessary to avoid hairstyles with clear straight lines, for example, you should not use a bob haircut or even bangs. Side swept bangs and wavy or layered hair framing the face are a good choice in this case.
  - Triangular faces work well with short haircuts to balance a powerful jaw and add volume to the top of the head. If you prefer long hair, it is important that it is longer than the jawline, otherwise the face will appear too full at the bottom.
  - Heart-shaped faces look good with puffed chin-length haircuts (bob haircuts work very well with them). Those with this type of face should avoid thick bangs and short haircuts, as this can make the face appear too massive at the top. Tight ponytails and other slicked back hairstyles can accentuate a small chin and should also be avoided.
  - Asymmetrical and layered haircuts work for round faces to help balance the width of the face. With this type of face, chin-length haircuts and even bangs can make the face look fuller, and the same goes for the center parting in the hairstyle. However, an offset parting and side swept bangs will look good!
  - Diamond-shaped faces look good with hairstyles that are quite full on the sides but not on the top. In other words, in this case, high hairstyles should be avoided. This type of face is suitable for bangs and face-framing puff haircuts. However, this requires avoiding the creation of central parting in the hairstyle.
  - Oval faces can appear elongated, so the hairstyle should break up the length of the face. However, avoid wearing too long hair. With this type of face, a bob haircut, puff haircut and straight bangs will look good.
4. Take care of the health of your hair. Wash your hair as needed and use a shampoo and conditioner suitable for your hair type (for example, for color-treated, normal, oily hair, etc.). Depending on the type of hair, you can wash them from once every two days to once a week. The drier the hair, the less often it needs to be washed.
Part 3
Applying makeup
1. Use eye makeup to highlight your eyes. You can apply different colors of eyeliner and eyeshadow to make your eyes really stand out.
  - If you have Blue eyes, use natural tones such as coral and champagne. Dark smoky eyeliner can overshadow your eyes, so it's best to experiment with this at home before going out.
  - gray or grey-blue eyes look good with dark and smoky shades of gray, blue and silver.
  - Green eyes look great with muted purples and shimmery browns.
  - Light brown or hazel green eyes will look good with metallic and pastel shades. Pale pink, muted copper and golden eye shadows go well with light brown eyes.
  - Brown eyes suit most shades and types of makeup. They look good with neutral shades of orange-pink and golden-bronze. For smoky makeup, you can add a little black eye shadow in the form of arrows on the outer corners of the eyes.
  - A popular smoky eye makeup involves mixing 2-3 tones of shadow on the eyelids to create a gradient transition of color (usually from dark to light in the direction from the eyelid to the eyebrows).
2. Use lipstick. Lipstick is a great tool to highlight the lips and give your image more expressiveness. At the same time, red lipstick is one of the most popular. Everyone can use it. The secret lies in choosing the right shade of red that will suit your skin tone.
  
  Apply lip liner. Apply lip contour before lipstick for long lasting hold. The lip liner can also be used to reshape the lips, making them plumper or thinner, depending on what you want.
3. Make sure your makeup is balanced. Dramatically bright eye makeup combined with equally dramatic bright lips is usually not recommended, as it can be too provocative. If, for example, you have applied smoky eye makeup, make your lips more neutral.
  - If you have used red lipstick, the rest of the makeup should be relatively calm. The classic combination is red lipstick and cat-eye makeup.
  - Similar rules apply to balancing hair color and makeup. For example, fiery red hair can limit the number of color options for lipstick that suits you.
4. Consider applying contour makeup. Contour makeup involves the use of dark and light shades of foundation to visually change the appearance of your face. For example, with contour makeup, you can visually reduce the nose and highlight the cheekbones.
  - Mastering the technique of contour makeup takes some practice, but if you really don't like something about yourself, it's worth a try.
5. Don't forget to wash off your makeup thoroughly. Cosmetics can irritate the skin and lead to breakouts. Thoroughly washing your face at the end of the day and removing any remaining makeup will prevent this from happening.
  - To avoid acne, choose cosmetics that do not clog pores. This will be separately stated on the packaging of the makeup product. However, even when using this cosmetic, rashes on the skin may appear.
  - If you make up your eyes a lot, then you may need to special agent to remove eye make-up or Coconut oil. With it, you can be guaranteed to completely remove makeup from the eyes before going to bed.

At one fine moment in my life, I realized that something was missing in me: it seems that you live, but something is not right and wrong. I looked at myself from the outside and in the mirror, went through one strong training on my own, read a couple of developing books. I made disappointing conclusions that I have a bunch of bad habits, I hardly devote time to my health, I'm not popular with girls, my level of disorganization goes off scale, and besides, I often get away from solving complex life tasks.

It doesn't matter how many days are in your life, what matters is how much life is in your days!

Sport

It all starts with its implementation in your life. Starting with basic exercises but you have to do it every day. This is simple exercises: squats, on the press (lifting the torso), push-ups. It all starts with a repetition of 5 times and every day increases by 1 time, you can perform two visits per day. In a month, you will squat 35 times, do ab exercises 35 times, and do push-ups 35 times. Then you can increase the number of repetitions as needed, but be sure to do it every day.

Each person needs to find his own sport, and you should not be led by fashion: everyone runs, which means running, everyone does yoga, which means yoga. Look for your sport that will suit you completely: loads, interest, time, financial component, people. It should be an extension of your essence.

I tried for a year, gym, boxing, running, jiu-jitsu, aikido, cycling. At the same time, he was engaged in several types for several months. It was a great time, because it was an absolute benefit for my health, and I also understood more and more what exactly I want from sports.

My choice fell on jiu-jitsu and swimming is the basis of my sports development. Now this is for life, because the pleasure that I get in the classroom is difficult to put into words, and my success in this field only reinforces this conviction.

Books

You will have to read a lot. An excellent result is 40–50 books per year. I have read 42 books and I understand that 50 books a year is realistic. The main thing is to read without stopping. And, of course, do not watch TV and do not stay too long on social networks.

Read only to develop your mind: psychology, Russian and foreign classics, self-development, finance - no tabloid or entertaining books.

Outline the essence of what you read, what impressed or disliked the book, memorize quotes. So you train your memory and you can always surprise your interlocutors with smart sayings from books.

Ayn Rand's book Atlas Shrugged greatly influenced me with its fundamental nature and strong dialogues, as well as situations similar to events in my life.

My morality, the morality of reason, is contained in one axiom: reality exists in one choice - to live. Everything else flows from here. To live, a person must consider three things as the highest and decisive values: Reason, Purpose, Self-Respect. Reason as the only tool of knowledge, Goal as the choice of happiness, which this tool should achieve, Self-respect as an indestructible confidence that he is able to think and his personality is worthy of happiness, which means worthy of life. These three values require all the virtues of man, and all his virtues are connected with the relation of existence and consciousness: rationality, independence, purity, honesty, justice, efficiency, pride.
Ayn Rand, Atlas Shrugged

Discipline

What distinguishes strong personality from an ordinary person is. Regardless of your mood, motivation, external circumstances, family relations do what is necessary in this moment time.

Learn to swim against the current life circumstances, educate yourself so that the internal state does not depend on what is happening around. It was very hard and not everything worked out right away, as there were breakdowns. But I went forward again and again with the support of loved ones and an inner desire to go this way at all costs.

Where can you start? From the morning ritual. Here is the simplest and most effective method for honing discipline: when the alarm goes off, get up immediately, wash your face, turn on the music, do exercises with strength exercises, then - a contrast shower, healthy breakfast(without fried and sweet) and reading a book (on the way to the office).

So you need to do until you can do it automatically and without forcing yourself. It took me 3 months, sometimes, of course, there were failures, especially after overloaded days. I recommend to anyone who wants to change their lifestyle to develop their own morning ritual.

We must learn to control ourselves: our speech, gait, gaze and gestures. Wherever you are, at home, at work, in the gym, you should radiate confidence and act without too much fuss. Remember the principle of feedback: even if you don’t feel like that, this feeling of confidence and discipline will come.

Highly useful exercise for development inner strength- despite all your natural fears, do not look away from the interlocutor, from people passing by who look into your eyes. Frankly, martial arts helped me in this. But it is also good to look with a warm look, showing that you are benevolent.

To educate myself, I learned to deny myself pleasures: bars, alcohol, sweets, cigarettes, impulsive shopping, idleness, empty talk at work. This may not happen right away, but we need to think about it all the time, work in this direction. And one day I said to myself: “Yes, I do not drink alcohol for three months and I haven’t eaten sweets for two months.”

I attended sports classes or courses despite my mood, circumstances, weather and my motivation. Set a schedule and stick to it, discard all your favorite excuses. I liked coming to the hall when something was stopping others and when there were like-minded people who were ready to support me in these endeavors.

And most importantly - you need to learn to control yourself when little is working out, and a mess is going on around. Be an island of calm and cold endurance.

Finance

Keep a financial journal. Lead it for a month, second, third and do not stop. And do not just keep it, but analyze every month what goes where, why and how to fix it.

I had big expenses for coffee - 1,300 rubles a month. I realized that it was time to reduce its amount, and now the level of spending on coffee is 600 rubles per month. Coffee is my weakness that I don't want to get rid of.

Many say that a magazine is a useless thing: "I already know how much I spend and earn." And you try to keep it for 1 year with accurate analysis and graphs and you will see the whole picture of your financial literacy or illiteracy.

Keep yourself in financial asceticism, stop buying what you don’t need or is imposed by advertising and acquaintances. Most of our purchases are useless and will not be useful in life, and it is quite easy to do without them.

Find additional income, even if it is small, but it will motivate you to achieve even greater achievements. Let it be an increased workload at work, additional work (of any format), freelancing, selling unnecessary things, teaching other people. Majority mistake - everyone wants a lot of money for early stages, but that doesn't happen. You do not immediately earn a lot at work, and in life everything is gradual.

Relations

This point is more about men who have not found their soul mate or even do not want to, which I was. If you are alone and have a lot of time, develop the skill of meeting girls. Register on dating sites, meet in cafes and on the street, chat in the gym, ask friends about girls you know.

Try different strategies communication: gentleman, macho, modest, sports guy. Meet girls smarter than you, admit it, conquer them.

AT different situations not everything will work out: wrong words, wrong method, not your person, failures in bed. But you do not stop, it should temper you.

And over time, you will learn to understand the opposite sex, learn how to easily start a conversation, make beautiful compliments. Girls will often reciprocate, feel in you interesting personality. But do not be self-confident, look for the one who will appreciate your qualities "without cuts", and be faithful and faithful to her.

If it's simple - love, suffer, conquer, disperse and start anew. Become the one with whom you want to spend time, with whom you will be comfortable in any situation, be able to understand and listen to the other person. And remember that your significant other can always leave you, so enjoy every moment together.

Skills

Start developing skills you didn't have before: breaststroke, typing, contextual planning, emergency driving, for example. Master them, find a mentor on the topic, get training. Such achievements develop the personality, make it multifaceted.

You will also learn how to deliberately step out of your comfort zone and overcome the fear that will later become yours. driving force. All great achievements begin with small victories over yourself.

Over the past 12 months, I have been doing things I have never done before: heavy weight training, meditation, training with children, training, austerity.

Spirituality

Define your values in life, create internal and social rules for yourself, find your "I".

Finally find the answer to eternal question: Why am I here? What is my mission?

How? Ask yourself important questions, do not look at other people who are drifting like a boat in the ocean, become a guide for yourself and others. Read spiritual books, visit spiritual places and, finally, create your own picture of the world order. This is very important, so you will become steadfast and you will have your own faith. Not the one that is shown in the media, but its own inner one.

Most people are afraid to ask themselves difficult questions and close themselves with materialism, like I did in my time, but this is a dead end branch of development. Things and everyday fuss cannot be closed, they will not give you the happiness that you will feel when you find something important inside that will lead you further.

Good Habits

As you get rid of bad habits and change structurally, you will need other habits - and it is better that they are useful.

For example, if you talk a lot, learn to be silent and listen to the interlocutor, even when your tongue is itching - be silent.

If you eat a lot of sweets, replace it with nuts or dried fruits, do not eat so much chocolate and cookies, drinking sweet tea.

Books are a great rescue from TV and Internet addiction. It's just that the brain doesn't want to "thin" anymore.

If you have nothing planned and everything happens just like that, start a notebook, write down all your tasks for the day, week, month. Write down the thoughts that come to you, fresh ideas, describe events and people. Keep track and analyze your life.

If you smoke, quit and immediately hit a sport, preferably one where the lungs work the most to expel all the resins from yourself.

Algorithm for structural change in 12 months

Sports load every day. On the long time decide on your sport, do it, no matter what, for a whole year.
Read a lot of books, 3-4 per month. Write down a summary of what you read.
Develop discipline. Deny yourself pleasure. Stay calm when it's stormy. Try to deny yourself something every month.
Develop financial literacy. Keep a financial journal and find extra income throughout the year.
If you are single - look for your soul mate and develop the skill of seduction. If you are not alone, fall in love again with your chosen one.
Learn new skills you didn't know before. Desirable - 1 skill in 2 months.
Find an answer for what you are here for, even an approximate one - it will already be good. Spend as much time on this as you see fit.
Get good habits instead of bad ones. This is everyday work.

Victory over yourself is the true success in life.

Change is difficult, but possible. The main thing is to want to set yourself interesting (and not so) goals and achieve them, no matter what. Everything will not work right away, there will be misfires, breakdowns, but the movement vector must be maintained, and you will definitely break through the barrier of your weakness.

If you think that this requires motivation or money, you are mistaken: you only need one pure desire to become better than you are, and time, which is already so small in our lives. But remember, there is no limit to perfection, this is a constant work on yourself, and it continues until the end of your days. A developed personality lives much happier than those who are weak in front of themselves and recede before life circumstances.

Almost every woman sooner or later faces the realization that not everything suits her in her appearance. Of course, every woman may want to see in the reflection of the mirror " best version yourself”, and if you also have such a desire, then we suggest that you familiarize yourself with some recommendations.

How to change your appearance to a girl, where to start

The first thing you should do is draw up a plan of action. Write down on a piece of paper what specifically you don't like about your appearance and how these traits can be changed for the better. Read on the Internet about various cosmetic procedures, in Photoshop, experiment with hair color, eyebrow thickness, and so on, in order to understand whether the intended changes will really suit you, and only then proceed to cardinal changes.

How to change beyond recognition

Make plastic Of course, this method is the most radical, but it should be resorted to only if there are any real defects on your face. It is not uncommon for a girl to impulsively change the shape of her lips or the shape of her eyes, but subsequently again turns to the surgeon in order to return everything “as it was” - there is a rejection of the “new self”. Besides, new version is not always better than the previous one. If you have been dreaming about the operation for a long time and are convinced that this is a real way to improve your appearance, then you can decide on the procedure. We recommend that you consult with several practical surgeons on this issue. Botox, lift Note that Botox injections and facelift are procedures that can help improve the appearance of women over 35-40 years old. For young girls, these facial manipulations, as a rule, are completely unnecessary, and can even be harmful. If you are not satisfied with the quality of your skin, consult a beautician and ask him to recommend procedures that will best suit your age. Make a face tattoo A fairly common procedure, but when doing it, keep in mind that sometimes you will have to make a tattoo correction so that it is not faded. Currently, there is a tattoo of lips, eyebrows and so on. Many women note the convenience of this method - for example, with the help of lip tattooing, they managed to visually increase their volume without resorting to hyaluronic acid injections and so on. In addition, such a tattoo helps to temporarily solve problems with makeup - the master initially selects the color that your lips will be painted according to your desire. Similarly, you can apply arrows on the eyelids - this will also help you save time on applying everyday makeup, if they are an integral part of it.

Change yourself internally Of course, internal changes are unlikely to change you beyond recognition, but they really can make significant changes in your image. It has long been noted that if a person reconsiders his attitude to life, finds himself in an unexpected hobby, begins to engage in various practices that help to achieve inner harmony, then these positive changes begin to have a better effect on the appearance. Lose weight or gain weight As you know, with a change in weight, changes in the face become noticeable. A woman who has lost weight begins to notice new features in herself - cheekbones that suddenly appear, the disappearance of edema, and so on. Even the eyes on the thinner face suddenly begin to appear larger and more expressive. Also, do not forget about the new outlines that the figure acquires. However, often, not only overweight women are dissatisfied with their figure, but also those who suffer from underweight. In the second case, you can gain the necessary kilograms by increasing muscle mass - in this case, a thin body will receive the desired shape in right places and acquire more advantageous proportions.

How to change in a month - action plan

If you want to achieve changes in appearance in a month, then outline the necessary action plan for yourself in advance. Dramatically change the hairstyle and hair color You can start with a radical change in hairstyle and hair color. If you have worn a braid below the waist for many years, then you can update the cut, for example, by cutting your hair to the shoulder blades. You can also grow hair, make bangs or an interesting haircut for your hair length. However, all this should be done only if you are convinced that the new image will really suit you. The same rule applies to hair coloring - if possible, try on a wig with strands of the desired color or process your photo in Photoshop to see how you will look with an updated hairstyle. Note that if you decide to go blonde, but now your hair is dark, then you will probably have to repeat the coloring procedure more than once, maintaining an interval of several days, to achieve the desired result. New makeup (or simplification if you've always been wearing bright makeup) Try to pick up a new make-up for yourself, with which you will look more spectacular. To do this, there are many training videos on the Internet and various courses. However, even without this, you can try to paint differently than usual - “play” with the color palette, apply shadows of a completely different shade to which you are used to, experiment with the color of lipstick. For these purposes, you can buy a few cheap lipsticks and an inexpensive set of shadows - this way you can definitely make sure which colors absolutely do not suit you, and which ones look very interesting on your face. Of course, after experimenting, clean your face and get a new lipstick and eye shadow of your favorite brand and those shades that, after experimenting, you liked the most on your face. Refresh your wardrobe Often, just by updating the wardrobe, a woman appears before others in a completely different light. Perhaps you are used to dressing in a certain style and do not even suspect that completely different things can suit you much more. We recommend that you choose a free day and, having come to a clothing store with reasonable prices for you, take a few wardrobe items that you usually do not pay attention to in the fitting room. Try to collect several images from things that are unusual for you, each of which must be photographed in the dressing room mirror. At home, look at your photos, remember the feelings you experienced when you put on new clothes, and come back for those things that suit you. However, you can buy those wardrobe items that are more familiar to you, but be sure to complement them with new accessories. Change habits and habits Give up bad habits - usually they do not have the best effect on the overall appearance. Better buy new ones instead. good habits- sports, proper nutrition, walking on fresh air etc. Visit new places, meet new people Expand your horizons by meeting new people and visiting new places. For example, visiting institutions various types, you will unwittingly expand your wardrobe - a dress for the theater, a sports suit for fitness classes, a new outfit for a date, and so on.

How to transform quickly and inexpensively

Sometimes, for the transformation a woman needs quite a bit - a good sleep and rest. Often we neglect this, and as a result we get dark circles or bags under the eyes, a tired look and other unpleasant changes in appearance. A rested and well-rested woman, in turn, usually looks fresh and cheerful, which cannot but improve her appearance. Find a way to set aside a couple of days for yourself in which you will do nothing but sleep and relax. Moreover, you need to relax not in front of the computer - take a walk around the city, just lie on the couch, take a bath with sea salt, foam and essential oils etc. Do your own hair and hair coloring Dyeing your hair at home is not at all difficult, if we are not talking about some complex dyeing or lightening it. On any hair dye you will find detailed instructions for use. Color your eyebrows Many women sign up for eyebrow painting in a beauty salon, or postpone this visit until later, not even suspecting that they can quite cope with this procedure at home, spending no more than 15 minutes on it. To do this, you just need to buy a tube of the desired paint in almost any cosmetic store. If you are not sure that you can cope with the task yourself, watch a video on the Internet how to do it, or read general recommendations. Go in for sports or go on a diet Sports can be practiced not only in gym but also at home. To do this, we recommend stocking up on a pair of dumbbells, and start doing the exercises - for this purpose, you can pick up several videos on the Web that demonstrate a set of exercises for a particular muscle group. Even if you just start doing squats and doing abs every day, this will already have a positive effect on your appearance. In case of presence excess weight on your body, we recommend choosing a suitable diet for yourself - this will not only improve your appearance, but also have a good effect on overall well-being.

What can you change in yourself if you have already tried everything

Make a tattoo, eyelashes, nails Try to make an interesting manicure - it can add unexpected touches to your look. Also, it is quite possible that extended eyelashes or eyelid tattoos will give more expressiveness to your look. Get yourself a tattoo If you have been dreaming of a tattoo for a long time, and this is not an impulsive decision, then maybe it's time to fulfill your dream? Choose a salon with positive reviews or make an appointment with the master according to the recommendations - for sure, even small drawing on a body that you like will give you the opportunity to experience yourself in a new way. Dye your hair an unexpected color Hair color plays a big role in the image as a whole. The same woman with different color hair looks completely different. Try to experiment with your hair, but make sure in advance that these changes will still suit you. Cut long curls or grow if you have a short haircut Of course, you can conduct unexpected experiments not only with hair color, but also with their length. Many women do not even suspect what they look like with waist-length hair, for the simple reason that they have never been able to grow their hair to this limit. Meanwhile, you may well try to grow your hair in the most gentle way or try on false strands. Also, some people wear waist-length hair for many years, despite the fact that this hairstyle does not suit them at all, and the curls in general do not look too neat from split ends. tips or dullness. Subsequently, some of them still cut their braid, making, for example, an elongated bob. As a result, their image becomes fresher and more interesting, and their hair looks much healthier.

To transform yourself for the better - do not rush to experiment

Think well and study the information Before deciding on drastic changes, try reading reviews about them on the Internet, consult with loved ones. Don't make decisions impulsively. Consult with experts Depending on the area in which you are planning changes, consult a hairdresser, beautician, plastic surgeon, and so on. Spend more time to get the best result Don't expect great results short term– in some cases this is not possible. We are talking about diets, sports activities, complex skin care, getting rid of cellulite and much more. It is difficult to achieve dramatic changes in a week if we are talking about significant weight loss, about gaining muscle mass or plastic surgery (recovery time required). However, during this time you can make many other changes in appearance. The main thing is to study in advance necessary information and make sure that these changes will really be for the better - otherwise, the matter may turn out to be a big disappointment for you. The main advice is to approach any experiments consciously.

Is it possible to externally become a different person in 1 day

In general, in one day you can really change your appearance quite significantly. However, if you are unhappy with your weight, then these changes will certainly take much longer. If the figure suits you, but you want some noticeable changes, then you can make them by changing the color of your hair, dyeing your eyebrows, increasing eyelashes, cleaning your face in the salon, changing your wardrobe, visiting a solarium, cutting or growing hair. If we are talking about internal changes, then, of course, it will take much more time. However, in one day you are also able to do a lot - to outline detailed plan actions that will help you achieve the desired results.

How to change in better side? The desire to develop is inherent in humanity by nature, and the desire for positive changes is inherent in everyone literally evolutionarily. The difference is at what stage a person begins to ask the question “how can you change for the better?”. Some people are pushed to such changes by failures and criticism of others, and then the desire for improvement is a defensive reaction, a way to avoid punishment, harassment or public ignorance.

Someone changes for a certain person (to please, earn respect, build a relationship) or relationship (taking criticism from an important person and choosing to make certain changes in themselves to maintain a meaningful relationship). Someone is inspired by other people's examples, and someone gets bored with the boring gray fuss. New travels, acquaintances, films, illnesses, disasters, breakups - these are all strong incentives to start changes. The leader in the list of reasons forcing people to change is fear, most often the fear of losing or being deprived of the opportunity to get what they want.

The concentration and direction of changes depend on the sphere requiring such changes and the global nature of the solution. If one person has to change their place of residence and occupation in order to realize their dream (and this is a thoughtful path that brings visible results of improvement), then how to change a person for the better (in his own character, the course of life and interaction with people) is simple updating your hair or wardrobe remains a mystery.

Each task has its own methods. Therefore, before mindlessly following the advice of ten steps to change yourself, try to understand what qualities you want to change, which ones to improve, to what extent and in what direction you want and are ready to move, what you need for this and what resources you already have. have. And succumbing to fashion trends to improve yourself, when your life suits you, is at least a stupid act, because in the process of change you can lose your old life that completely suited you.

How to change for the better character?

Consists of many habits, developed reactions and ways of responding, so it is not possible to change it completely. Trying to simultaneously get rid of all the qualities that you consider negative and all the habits that somehow interfere with your life is simply an impossible task. Having taken on such a burden, you can hold out for a week, and then break into the previous state, if not in an aggravated form. Break the global task into components, and work simultaneously on one or more qualities, gradually connecting the rest when you cope with the first.

How can a person change for the better if he does not have a starting point of action, i.e. understanding who he is and his inner spiritual world. The solution of any problem begins with study, in the case of a change in character, the need to immerse yourself in the world of one's own experiences becomes peremptory. The first question along the way of this study will be about the reasons for the change. Analyze what events push you to this. Changes made out of a sense of love and self-care will bring beneficial consequences (reducing the tendency to irritability will save you from heart problems, developing the ability to refuse will give you more time for yourself and with loved ones, training perseverance will help you finish the project). At the same time, if you started to redraw your character for the convenience of others, then you will not feel better from such a situation, and the feeling of violence against your own psyche will remain and may return to you in the form of psychosomatics (becoming compliant at the request of others, you will be inundated with their requests , increased rigidity in order to prove something to someone can turn friends away from you, and outwardly good-natured communication with those who betrayed you is fraught with the development of hypertension and peptic ulcer disease).

Listen carefully to what you are changing for and look at the results, who will be easier and more joyful.

In order to change for the better in character, it is necessary to maintain a constant enough high level happiness and self-interest. Re-evaluate your inhibiting beliefs and kick out half of them (staying up because you have to cook a meal, not picking up your last candy, skipping movies in favor of cleaning your house are all examples of things that can bring you bits of happiness and well-being, and you will lose only false beliefs that this is not possible). Every day, look for what will bring you joy, make sure that your life is filled with activities, hobbies, entertainment that you enjoy, and are not popular or approved by your friends. Good character does not imply complete adjustment to the world, but it certainly includes an understanding of one's own needs, since only in this way can one understand and accept the differences of others.

How to force yourself to change for the better? Do not delay achieving what is important to you, justifying it as a priority for others now, or, work on your perseverance. Work not to change yourself, but to change life in your direction. You will not be able to become a comfortable copy that fits into the above standards. There will always be those who do not love you and you are free to compete with them, fight, not communicate or look for common ground. There will always be places where you are not in the subject, and you are free to whine and stay there, leave to look for others or create your own. The world is plastic, and self-acceptance helps to find organic ways to fulfill needs, in addition to reshaping one's own personality.

How to change for the better for a girl?

When a crisis erupted in a relationship or a girl who walks around with a silent and dissatisfied face for a week, and the relationship is getting cooler, the guys begin to look for ways to change for the better. The first thing to understand is to prefer action, and the sooner the better, and not to carry out serious Scientific research this problem.

A common mistake guys make in their changes is that they completely focus on the interests of the girl, trying to please or even anticipate her desires. This tactic can help a lot. If before that you absolutely did not pay attention to it, but most often it does not bring results. To make a girl feel more comfortable and interesting with you, you need to pump own life and abilities. So instead of constantly annoying your companion, get busy - read a book from a new field for you, sign up for courses, go in for sports, open a new hobby. A person who does not stand still, develops, knows what he wants, attracts attention. Expanding the circle own interests, it will be easier for you to understand the girl, more topics for conversation and reasons for spending time together. Self-development is a time-consuming and time-consuming way to improve yourself in the eyes of a girl, but more reliable than a presented bouquet.

Follow not only the development inner world but also for their appearance. Take care of the cleanliness and tidy appearance of clothing, the regularity of hygiene procedures, pay special attention to your health (adjust the regimen, nutrition, pastime), exercise different types(beautiful muscles, of course, delight, but dexterity, the ability to handle different types of transport, accuracy will make the girl look with admiring eyes).

How to change for the better for a girl? Look for the positive in everything and tune in to this wave. Good mood, the ability to cheer up, get out of unpleasant situation with humor - those qualities that women really appreciate in men. And of course, do not forget to take into account the wishes of your companion, because if she voiced a request to be late less often, then the first thing you should work on is your own. Girls usually make it clear what they want from guys, do not neglect her words, because before expressing criticism aloud, she had already kept silent for a while, justified, endured and did everything possible in hers so as not to make claims against you.

How to change for the better for a guy?

Girls, striving for a permanent one, are guided in their activities by two factors: own desires and the wishes of the guys. Usually, in order to become better for a guy, in the first place are external changes. To become more feminine, to change worn out jeans for an airy dress, to learn how to walk in stiletto heels - this is all an arsenal that women actively use to increase their own attractiveness in the eyes of men. Indeed, appearance plays an important role in the formation and emergence of interest, but later they get used to the appearance, and a man will exchange any beautiful doll for a woman with whom he is comfortable and cozy.

Internal change is a more serious and time-consuming process than external transformations. Putting on a dress and looking feminine is the task of several hours, but to remain feminine in your actions, regardless of the wardrobe, is a whole art, which is now devoted to many trainings. But usually guys don't need that much. They are interested in live and real girls who know themselves, their skills, strong and weak sides they know what they want. Internal fullness, reliability, ability to support difficult situation and the ability to understand attract guys and make them stay around.

Get to know yourself, engage in your own development, accept yourself, this world and the guy who is nearby as they are, and you will become better not only for him, you will feel how it has become more comfortable and joyful for you to live with yourself, how the world around you began to take care of you. Get more open to the world, develop spontaneity and try to replace criticism and prejudice with an exploratory interest in the opinions and lives of other people - such changes will not leave others indifferent and will give space for the realization of your inner space.