How to get out of a difficult financial situation. Way out of a difficult situation

11.10.2019

positive psychology 08.10.2016

Dear readers, each of us at least once in our lives, got into crisis situations, and everyone knows that “saving the drowning is the work of the drowning themselves”, and that even if everything is very bad, there is still a way out!

And today on the blog I want to present you a kind of continuation of the topic raised in the article from Marina Tamilova - a teacher, psychologist and a person of versatile hobbies. I give the floor to Marina, who this time will share with you her own recipe for getting out of difficult life situations, which often abound in our lives.

Dear readers, in today's article I want to offer you my personal, working, method of pulling yourself out of life's impasse. No matter how bad you feel, sooner or later you will have to pull yourself together and move forward. Hope I can help you with this...

What is the scariest thing in life

Life often presents a person with surprises: both pleasant and unpleasant. Someone has more pleasant, but someone, on the contrary. Sometimes people live for years in misfortunes and stresses, and not invented, but the most real: an endless series of illnesses, deaths of relatives, impoverishment, family breakdown and even homelessness. Such misfortunes simply kill a person from the inside, destroying his soul and leading further and further away from unity with the Absolute.

The most terrible thing in this situation is that many cannot stand it (and they can be understood), take offense at the whole world and turn away from the Source from which we all came. It is very difficult not to be offended when the hardest trials fall on your lot. While other people live and enjoy life to the fullest. How to explain normal person who tries to live according to his conscience, that all problems come from himself, and people and God have absolutely nothing to do with it.

You should always understand that the life situation that you have in the present is the result of your actions or, conversely, inaction in the past. It is useless to be offended by this. A person always has a choice: to be offended or not, to help someone not, to respond with evil to evil or not, to choose this particular person or another as a spouse, to accept a low-paid job and complain about poverty, or to take responsibility for one’s life and create themselves anew in accordance with their ideas about their own lives.

Most often, a person chooses to do nothing, because it is scary, and it is not known what lies ahead. We are not used to freedom. Especially the older generation, who grew up in the Soviet Union and got used to the fact that everything in life is planned and understandable. At that time, a good education guaranteed employment and good earnings, but now it does not. Many forties, fine educated people, were confused and could not find their place in life, which led to a series of suicides and mental disorders in the 90s.

“Thanks to” perestroika, we have lost several generations of “psychological children, adolescents and young men” who simply could not adapt. Survived and rose more persistent, able to fight for their "place in the sun" both physically and morally. But these are only 10% of the population. It is they who occupy places in the Forbes lists.

The most difficult thing in our time is for “psychological youths” - these are people, often with several higher education very smart and well educated. Unfortunately, they are used to a lot of thinking, but not doing. That is why they are at very low levels of society, and sometimes below the poverty line, if they could not adequately "sell" their intellect. In general, most people behave as if they have 500 years left to live, as Bill Gates once put it.

Life dead end. What to do? How to find a way out of a difficult situation

There are several options:

go to people for help;
help someone who is even worse;
carry out general cleaning in the house;
get rid of negative thoughts and beliefs;
forgive everyone;
stop being offended at all;
get out of the comfort zone;
take responsibility for your life.

The last item on this list is the most important. You need to understand that no one, instead of you, will create you anew, or make you a completely different person.

They can help you financially, if you're lucky, help with work, but no one, instead of you, will mold you into a new one. strong personality that will be able to live by its own rules and still thrive. Nobody argues that it is difficult. Especially when present, emotional instability. Periods of inspiration and activity are replaced by times of complete despair and the feeling that nothing will ever work out, and it is better to “go with the flow”, leaving everything as it is. And now specifically what you personally need to do to change your life.

We paint our life

Sit down in silence and write down in detail what you want in life. Do not be shy. For example, if you want a yacht and a villa in Italy, then write, no matter how stupid and unrealistic it all seems to you.

Visualization

Find bright pictures of your future life, stick them on big leaf drawing paper along with their photographs in chic interiors next to handsome prince or princess. Whatman paper should be hung in the most prominent place in your apartment. This is very inspiring.

Looking for inspiration

Find music and meditations that inspire you personally on the Internet and listen to it every day.

What about insults?

Get rid of all insults honestly and be sure that if you don’t, then it’s like “to spite the conductor” - buy a ticket and go on foot. It is the accumulated grievances and the old rubbish of unfinished business and desires that do not allow you to move forward. If you are a Christian, go to church often and pray. For some, this helps a lot in difficult situations. Confess, take communion, light candles and pray for everyone who offended you. This will bring your soul invaluable benefits.

Pullback moments

In moments of “kickbacks”, when you want to roar and do nothing, sit and roar, beat dishes, scatter things, dance until you drop to let off steam. And when the tantrum is over, put things in order and start all over again. Over time, such disruptions will become less and less. Everyone has them. It is your EGO that resists letting you into a new bright life. Not only the EGO resists, but also the egregore of the negativity that you have been accumulating for years. Egregors are a kind of energy fields to which each of us is connected. Egregors feed on your emotions. If you live, for the most part, in negativity, then you attract negative egregors to yourself, which are unprofitable for you to change.

Steps and steps

Do something little by little every day to move towards your goal. Don't get frustrated because you can't. Sooner or later you will succeed if you are persistent enough and do not stop halfway. If you do not regularly create yourself and your life, then life, environment and other people will create you, and they will do it in such a way that you will not like it at all.

Our Action Plan

Plan your action for real world and list psychological practices that you need to do every day to get out of a crisis situation. Exercise helps to move forward and neutralize fears, anxiety and pessimism. Incorporate regular exercise into your daily schedule as well, as your body is the "temple of the soul." The more in a better condition your body is, the more energy, will and strength you have to create your new life.

Just start doing

It must be said that many people do everything that I wrote about above, but they never move on to real actions, unable to move themselves at all. This is because your thoughts are still in the negative. Subconsciously, you still do not believe in yourself and feel that you are not worthy of change.

What to do with it? It will take time for you to develop the habit of replacing each of your negative thoughts with 2-3 positive ones. For example: “I won’t succeed” you can replace with “I am a beloved child of God, and all his blessings are created for me”, “if God is for me, then who is against me?”, “I always succeed, because that God directs all my actions.

For atheists and representatives of other religions, I note that the word God here means the Creator of all things, the Universe, which exists independently of any beliefs and religions created by man. This is the Absolute, which is above everything and which is the most powerful energy. unconditional love from which we all came.

In addition to the purification of thoughts, you will need to purify your body, which is also accustomed to suffering. Slags and toxins accumulate in the body not only from alcohol, nicotine and junk food, which we all use, especially in moments of psychological stress and melancholy. The negative from the corresponding mental thought forms also gets stuck in the body. We feel it in tense muscles, a distorted and gloomy face, chronic diseases. That is why massage, the release of bodily blocks and physical exercises you need to make your constant companions on the way to a brighter future.

Effective practices for getting out of life's impasse

In conclusion, here are a few effective methods ambulance, when once again the thought came that “everything is bad, and it will always be like this”:

smile - to let the body know that everything is fine;
jump - to shake and cheer up the body;
walking, sitting and living only with a straight back - this is fundamentally important, because. energy passes through the spine;
pinch your little finger - to pull out of bad thoughts;
to the question "how are you?" ALWAYS answer “the best!”;
walk home and work on different routes and better on foot - to create a feeling of change and vigor.

When you learn how to pull yourself out of a state of melancholy with such methods, then you can more closely tune in to a positive wave of your inner peace using the methods outlined in this article.

I thank Marina for the thoughts. From myself I want to say that you should never give up, no matter what happens in your life. If something happens, it's all just our lessons. So, for something, we need to go through everything. I've been through so much myself. And every time I was looking for a way out of their crisis.

Perhaps many will say, after reading the steps, all this is banal, I did it, it didn’t help me, nothing can be changed, and some of these thoughts continue. I would like to focus on such a moment: when a person is under stress, very rarely he himself will be able to get out of the crisis. It's just that emotions are running high, preventing us from thinking. The exception is people who already have a lot of wisdom, a lot of knowledge about our work on ourselves.

Do not close yourself in any case! Look for a person, possibly a professional, who will be close to you and whom you can hear. It can be a psychologist, and a wise friend, and the necessary useful books. And ask the Universe for help. I remember how in the most difficult times I came up to the window in the evening, looked at the starry sky, asked questions and asked them to give me the strength to cope.

There is no one recipe for all. We are all different. But it is imperative to look for something that will help you get out of a crisis situation. This is our path.

And the most important thing for all of us, as Marina correctly wrote, is to make our CHOICE. This applies to everything. And health, and a beautiful job, worthy of you, and a loved one nearby, and simple joys. I wish everyone a worthy choice, wisdom and steps, work in this direction.

Dear readers, it is difficult to grasp the immensity in one article. If you have difficult times, go to our section. I am sure that you will find a lot of useful things for yourself. Perhaps this is where your work on yourself will begin, including on overcoming the crisis.

And more news from me from our creative team. Our autumn issue of the magazine "Fragrances of Happiness" - Wings of Autumn has been released. You can find out about everything here.

Autumn issue of Fragrances of Happiness

And for the soul, we will listen to Richard Clayderman Mariage d'amour. Relax with pleasant music.

19 comments

Elina
09 Feb 2017 at 17:33

How often, when we find ourselves in a difficult situation that requires a strong-willed solution or elimination of problems, we begin to think that this is it - a Hopeless Situation. Having believed once that there is no way out of your situation, you allow pessimism and self-pity to take over, and you find yourself in a vicious circle of your own and. I propose an alternative approach - to believe that there is always a way out, and not one, you just need to make an effort to see it. The main part of these efforts will be aimed at maintaining a positive attitude and maintaining faith in a successful resolution of the situation.

So, there are no hopeless situations - this is a fact. And then what happens - what do we take for "hopeless conditions"?

The need to make a decision. It's complicated, scary and requires you to take responsibility for your choice and its consequences. If the choice is wrong, there will be no one to blame but ourselves, so our consciousness closes and pretends that there is no way out, and we, in turn, play along with it. Convince yourself that nothing depends on you - the approach weak man. Take courage and remind yourself that control is always in your hands - yes, you can make a mistake, but this is your decision, independent and balanced, which means you are an adult and responsible person.
What to do:
- - Mistakes are your personal, invaluable experience that you can always use for the benefit of your development.
- Use our advice - take control of your life in your own hands, do not be a victim.
The fear of change can paralyze even a smart and developed person in all respects. Such is the nature of man - it is more comfortable for him to exist in conditions of certainty, and all the unknown scares and has a much lower level of comfort. Refusing to do something out of fear that your life will change is not stupid, but terribly inefficient. Change is always for the better - tell yourself this day and night until you believe it, and then you will find that you mistakenly considered your situation a hopeless one.
What to do:
- Change it to a constructive one, and your life will pick up a new pace of development, just like you.
- Read - these daredevils have changed not only themselves and their lives, but also the world in which we live, is this not an incentive to joyfully plunge into the coming changes?
Convenience of a "familiar place". A person can adapt to any conditions, even the most destructive and uncomfortable for himself. Being in a dysfunctional marriage or working at a job where you are humiliated and not appreciated, and justifying it by saying that there is no other way out means indulge your complexes and low self-esteem. If self-esteem is very low, a person may even stay in a relationship where violence is used against him - because it is convenient, convenient from his point of view. Trying to change the situation and get away from the role that you are used to playing is difficult, but necessary.
What to do:
- To work with - without this work, any attempts to get off the ground will be short-lived and will entail a return to the previous circumstances.
- To understand and accept that you deserve more and better - for this you need.
Some people try to pass off banal laziness as a hopeless situation. If a person does not want to make any effort to find a solution, he directs them to looking for excuses. Excuses invented for others are gradually accepted on faith and consciousness, and now a person is sincerely convinced that in his circumstances there is no way out. And you just need to want to change your life and direct your efforts in the right direction.
What to do:
- Learn - no one will do it for you.
- Work to get better - just work, not try or try.
The pleasure of complaining. It is common for many people to complain about their bitter fate, evil people around them and unfortunate circumstances instead of something. do. The goal is to get confirmation from others that they are right - “there is no way out, I am unhappy, I didn’t even have a chance, given what kind of childhood I had ...”.
What to do:
- Stop whining!
- Learn why, and how to channel energy from complaining into action.
devotion to standards. “That’s the way it is” is the worst excuse for not acting. By whom it is accepted, why and why this should be reflected in your life, it does not matter at all if you decide to justify your "hopeless" situation with someone else's opinion, traditions and established orders. In this world, neither those around, nor the rulers of states, nor anyone else don't define you, only you! You yourself determine where the limit of your possibilities is, so call them limitless, limitless, instead of hiding behind the notorious "it's customary."
What to do:
- , although it is new and scary - you need it.
- Use technique to release energy and direct it to creation.

Of course, first of all, I am writing these tips to remind myself that there are no hopeless situations, but I also want to convey this to you. They really do not exist, there are difficult ones, which are points of our growth if we choose the path of development, not stagnation.

Hello dear friends!

All people, without exception, found themselves in difficult situations. Some of us quickly find an opportunity to get out, others wander in the labyrinths of fears, and at the most crucial moment.

Problems at work? Difficult relationship with loved ones? Have you been covered by a dilemma with your head and does not let go of your iron grip? Do not rush to give up or become like an ostrich, which so skillfully hides its head in the sand!

Today's material will be devoted to an insidious and necessary issue. How to exit difficult situation a winner and pass for a strong, strong-willed personality? There are a great many answers to this question. It all depends on how you deal with complexity.

The reactions of people are varied: for some it is important to concentrate and still find a way to overcome an unpleasant event, for others it is important to be in time and take someone else's advice, and someone will decide to do nothing in the hope that Superman will save them.

Specialists and scientists involved in the study of human reactions note only three methods of struggle that dominate the individual at the moment of life's "crash":

struggle with circumstances;
passive position;
escape.

Overcoming difficulties is not complete without making decisions. In the context of what happened, the person experiences tearing and tormenting throwing in his own opinions, wondering " What to choose?».

Struggle is a natural reaction of an individual to an unpleasant incident. Connecting and rushing adrenaline helps to cope with the excitement and still find a way out of the impasse. But in this way there is a risk of falling into the cycle of aggressive influence and, in the end, breaking down.

Inaction is one of the most common ways to solve problems that have piled on. Sometimes we apply this behavior at the most inopportune moment. We humbly endure the blows of fate and are afraid to show ourselves to the world by showing a powerful rebuff.

Position " It's not me, it's life! What can I do?' is dangerous and destructive. Tolerance good quality, but still, it saves the individual from trying to improve his life, reveling in the phantom of hopelessness.

Escape, as such, similarly affects a person's thinking and forms a distorted interpretation of reality. Instead of solving problems, he chooses to change the scenery overboard.

Types of escape from reality

Chemical escape

Pills, drugs, alcohol or other addictions. Being intoxicated allows you to stop perceiving this world as real and reduces the level of aggression inside. But is this the solution to life's difficulties?

Geographic flight

It is impossible to run away from yourself. Wherever we go, we have to take our reflection in the mirror with us. At the moment of epic tension, a person, having weighed all the risks and opportunities, falls into the trap of fear. And then, all arguments and arguments come to naught.

Flight of the aristocrat

This way of solving problems is the most positive. In the case of applying the above tactics, a person seeks to pull out emotions. Such an outburst can take a creative form.

The person turns off the phone, closes all the locks in the house or in the garage and begins to create. With the help of art, he transforms aggression and uses it in the most creative way, but, unfortunately, things will still stand in the place where they left them, but with a picture!

What measures to take?

1. Do not blame yourself for all earthly troubles and disasters

In the relationship between yourself and the world, you should not use self-flagellation with or without reason. A pathological tendency to blame oneself is not an option. You are responsible only for yourself and for your actions that form the picture of life as a whole. This means that only you have the right to change your world by making a choice in the direction of one decision or another.

A sober look at the incident from the outside helps to find a way out of the situation. At a crucial moment, you should support yourself with a word and, otherwise, the only thing you will achieve is empty accusations upon what happened.

2. Thoughts are the beginning of actions

What is the law of attraction? it magical ability people to attract into their lives the results of their fears or dreams. The ending of your film depends on how you will be set. A utopian ending or a happy ending is your area of responsibility.

If you practice positive affirmations like this: I can do everything! I can do it!”, then the reasons for worrying are not yet visible on the horizon. But in case you pounced on yourself with the installation: “ Everything is lost! This is the end!”, then believe me, it will be so.

3. Calmness and logic

Difficulties can maniacally attract to their aid an anxious state, which is characterized by increased irritability and anxiety. Making decisions in the heat of the moment is due to factors that unsettle you. The desire to get off as soon as possible moves us towards emotional attempts to end hard labor, deciding to take the measures that first came to mind.

I advise you to definitely take a breather. Try to relax or distract yourself from the conflict. If negative surprises caught you at work, then it is vital to take a pause and think.

An impulsive solution to a problem can affect your career or simply put you in an inadequate state. Try to delegate authority and drink herbal tea. Taking a break for a few minutes and taking a walk in the open air, you will be able to more carefully and calmly analyze what happened and come out of the situation as a winner, and not a hysteric.

4. Root of Evil

First of all, you need to try to find the main source of trouble. Think about the emotions you are experiencing. Fear, anger, irritability, panic? With pronounced anger or, the brain ceases to adequately assess reality and refuses to truthfully broadcast the circumstances.

Protect yourself from unnecessary feelings. Revenge, punishment, or the desire to deal with offenders can significantly spoil the situation, aggravating it to the limit. Answer the question: “Will this matter in 1 year?”, “What happened and what is the worst thing that could happen?”.

Write on a piece of paper the positive and negative sides of the “medal” and realize the fact of the transience of what happened. Time will pass and it will begin to be perceived as a trifle.

5. Here and Now

If you try to perceive life as a continuous experience, then everything is not so bad. Each of us is faced with what seems to be impossible missions or complexities. But then, with good structure, small details add up to a big puzzle and we clearly see the door with the inscription exit. It is important to strive to make a decision today, without putting the problems in a cell with debts.

Determine for yourself the path of retreat in the event of a non-ideal expiration of events. Know in advance where you will come, turn left here. The habit of thinking before acting greatly simplifies existence and fills a person with a sense of control, rather than chaotic drifting through the sea in an unknown direction.

Break the task into small sub-items and start taking action. And by doing more today for tomorrow, you can grab a head start and be one step ahead of the tsunami.

Friends, on this positive note, I will end today's article.

See you on the blog, bye bye!

In a person's life there are many complex and sometimes hopeless, impasse situations. And often people do not know what to do and how to get out of the impasse.

Today, on the site of psychological assistance in difficult life situations website, you will read the recommendations of a psychologist and learn how to find a way out of critical, seemingly hopeless situations in life.

Desperate situation - life's impasse

In most dead ends in life, people wind themselves up. And most often, any hopeless situation is only regarded as such by the person himself, because. at this critical, stressful moment, he cannot fully, to the fullest extent, use his intellect, knowledge and skills.

When a person is under stress, he thinks stereotypically, and on emotions - he is annoyed or depressed.

What is a stalemate, a hopeless situation in a person's life?
A psychological impasse, or a hopeless situation in life - it is also called a stalemate - is when a person cannot make the right life choice, is unable to find a solution to a problem, or does not know what to do under any difficult or critical circumstances.

He is under stress, depression or neurosis at this moment, therefore he cannot think and act adequately to the situation “here and now”.

What to do if you find yourself in a critical, difficult life situation?
The first thing to do in a crisis, deadlock situation is to understand in advance for yourself that there are no hopeless situations.

You can always find a way out of the circumstances and make your choice.

Prevention of crisis and hopeless situations in life
In order to prevent crises - to have as few of them as possible in life - you need to constantly expand your worldview - to make a wider model of the world, a map of reality.
And not to live constantly in stagnation, in your "comfort zone".

In other words, in order for you not to have serious impasses in life, you need to constantly engage in personal growth and self-development.

"Constantly" is a lifetime. Then you do not have to look for a way out of the impasse - you simply will not get into it.

How to find a way out of a hopeless situation

If you have ALREADY found yourself in a dead-end, crisis situation, then you need to immediately get out of it. First of all, by relieving stress and changing the attitude towards the problem itself.

How to find a way out of a dead-end, hopeless situation?

You can relieve stress almost instantly, for example, by relaxing with the help of psychotraining, deep breathing, or changing your negative thoughts about the problem to more positive or neutral ones;
After you normalize thinking and emotions, you will be able to assess and adequately characterize the problem (often, only by changing your attitude, the problem disappears on its own);
If you have little obvious choices, for example, only two, you can rationally and adequately (without nerves) expand your worldview and see other possibilities for solving the problem;
If all choices are evil, then the lesser of several evils is chosen;
If you can’t get out of a hopeless situation on your own, resort to help ...

Help in a difficult life situation

When people cannot get out of life's impasse on their own - they are under stress, depression, "nervous" - then professional, psychological help in crisis situations.

After removing neurotic symptoms, it will be possible to find a way out of almost any hopeless situation.

Consult online psychologist-psychoanalyst Matveev Oleg Vyacheslavovich

Instruction

Although crisis situations and knock a person out of his usual life rut, but on the other hand, they provide him with the opportunity to overestimate his life values. After all, it is at this time that he can look at his life from a different angle and assess the circumstances.

To get out of the crisis, use one of the three main directions. First, never put up with a problem. This only indicates that the usual life attitude has exhausted itself, and the next life stage has ended. Bring the matter to the end, take stock and move on to a new stage in your life.

Secondly, if you do not want to change anything in your life, then try to reflect on the problems that have arisen. Draw conclusions for yourself that will help you accept the current situation.

And finally, you can adapt to the circumstances, go with the flow, relying on the actions and decisions of other people. In this case, the crisis situation will sooner or later lead you to living conditions that you will be forced to accept.

Any of these options has the right to exist, and you can use each of them separately or in combination with each other. Each situation will require its own solution, because life is diverse in its manifestations, and no situation will be similar to another.

Think of the problem as a task that needs to be solved later, the acquired knowledge will help you build your life exactly the way you want it. But all these puzzles must be solved as they become available, because the more unresolved problems, the higher the wall you have built, and the more difficult it will be to destroy it.

Do not go into the problem with your head, but try to realize the opportunity to put your feelings and thoughts in order. Prayers, meditations, doing what you love, such as gardening or needlework, will help you with this. Go swimming, take a walk in the park, read your favorite book or watch a movie. Fulfill your old dream: learn foreign language, conquer Everest or throw trash out of the house. The result will not keep you waiting, and soon you will be able to feel that the unfavorable situation has turned to you on the other side, there will be changes for the better and new opportunities.