Self-digging after the betrayal of his wife. The situation of adultery in the practice of psychological counseling. Who changes and why

27.06.2020

I see that the issue has already been resolved, but I think one more comment will not be superfluous. I hope you read.

armi, in the formulation of the question, you separate the behavior of the child from the behavior of the parents. as if he were living a separate life, and his behavior from nowhere ... and that it was him - the child urgently needs to be changed and corrected by some methods, punishments and some other manipulations. but do not forget that he is 4.5 years old and all his behavior is a mirror image of the environment in which he grew up. all the traits of his character, the peculiarities of his behavior are the product of the reality that you and your husband created for him.

You say that there is no violence in the family - only verbal conflicts. but isn't that enough? words have great power. a word can support, inspire a person and literally bring him back to life. and words can upset, bring to despair, and even suicide. conflicts in words - the same war. the same violence, the same wounds and pain.
especially if you use swear words. it is generally by its nature - the words of an insult to the Mother of God. an insult to the purest Holy. such words have no place in people's lives either in conversations or in thoughts. be extremely careful with this.

Of course, all your ways to influence the child do not bring the proper effect. after all, the very reason for such behavior of the child was not eliminated. if your faucet breaks, you can of course substitute pots for a while, plug it with rags, and soak water from the floor, but until you turn off the water and change the faucet to a new serviceable one, the problem is not solved ... so you can certainly intimidate his belt and beatings, but then you drive the problem deep inside the child and in the future it will bring you even greater dividends ...

what does it mean to shut off the water in your case - to stop all kinds of disassembly between the parents. no swearing in the family. The child must neither see nor hear this. what is a faulty faucet? this is the model of life behavior that he has already absorbed into himself, this is the matrix that already controls his behavior. what to replace it with? new behavior in the family: a manifestation of love, tolerance, mutual understanding between parents in the first place and in relation to the child secondly. After all, the child takes an example from his parents in everything, he does what he sees, not what he is told to do. if you do not change the relationship in the family, then your child will not have a chance for proper development.

he (the child) at the moment simply has no choice, he does not know how to do it differently, he was not shown that it could be different. and your parents have this choice, then you are adults.

so here the good assistant is right in his own way when he talks about the reasons for such behavior .. and he is right and logos that the upbringing of the child should be in the same key for both parents, you must be at the same time and together make efforts for the correct upbringing of the child. the only thing wrong here is to educate, excuse me, the parents first. and the kids will be on their way.

have a serious talk with your husband. he must be aware that his mission in the upbringing of the child is not limited only to the material support of the family. what is it for - material support if in the family: resentment, pain, insult and violence already ...

You are adults, everything is in your power and in your power: change the life of the family for the better.

Renowned American Pediatrician Benjamin Spock loyal to the manifestations.

They say that over time, the child will outgrow the periodic bursts of aggressiveness, since good relationships between the people around him and the goodwill of his parents will serve as a good example for him. But Is this practice always appropriate? no resistance?

How to nurture independence and responsibility in a child? Learn about it from ours.

Causes of aggression

Just as it is impossible to take seriously a children's game of war as an attempt on the lives of the participants in the battle, so not every cuff is a sign of a child’s aggression towards loved ones.

How to recognize when it is time for a child to explain the desired framework for his behavior by others and what his attempts to behave rudely with others really mean?

Of course, if baby is too small and is not yet able not only to evaluate his actions, but even with difficulty manages his own hands - no one is safe from accidental arrivals in the face.

But if in the future adults do not show that such actions are an undesirable phenomenon, then the habit can become fixed in the subconscious of a small person and become a completely acceptable practice for him.

Why do children beat their parents?

Age 1-2 years:

Age 3-4 years:

Spoiledness and permissiveness, the lack of an adequate response to aggression towards an adult.

An instantly excited psyche requires a quick discharge, so the process is poorly controlled by consciousness and is not regulated by internal "brakes" that have appeared due to education.

Tensions in the family or even violence: what the child sees, he reproduces.
Deviation in development. Children with serious mental illness cannot control their behavior.

Age 5-6 years:

Preschoolers already understand the difference between acceptable and unacceptable behavior if they grew up in an adequate environment.

Therefore, any non-playful attempts to hit an adult or parent are sign of a serious problem.

everything is allowed to the child, which is why he is used to the fact that no one orders him;
living in a family where the demonstration of violence and aggression is a normal practice;
access to video materials with a violent plot.

Why does a one-year-old baby hit his mother in the face?

While he is just beginning to explore the world, clapping in the face is a way of understanding the world and one of the few forms of protest available to the child at the moment. The child is not yet fully aware that in the adult world it is a way of expressing insult, humiliation and aggression.

The child may begin to gain a habit, which is disgusting in fact, to enjoy when someone is hit. In the future, this skill base may be the cause of a poorly understood but persistent craving for bullying over someone.

An intentional strike should be stopped with words indicating your dissatisfaction with such behavior and blocking the raised arm and leg for a second action.

If the child persistently tries to perform a blow and he succeeds, you can fend off manipulation. Naturally, not in full force, but tangible.

For example, tap on the handle with your finger and strictly say that you can’t do this. Even without understanding the meaning of many words, babies closer to a year already perfectly recognize intonations and are able to respond to them correctly.

What to do?

A child beats his parents when he is crazy: what to do? From one and a half to two years old, children quite consciously perceive themselves and the world around them within the family.

With the right upbringing, they already have some idea of the limits of normal behavior, but, of course, they are not always able to control their aggressiveness and other strong emotions.

But little by little they are assimilating link between bad behavior and subsequent punishment in the form of a ban on dessert, playing on a computer, etc.

Directly one of the options for the behavior of an adult can be a strong hug of the child with blocking the arms of the legs.

With a normal child's psyche, such an impact quickly has the desired effect, since it does not allow the child to go to its fullest.

Besides calmness of an adult also works positively.

How to behave?

Show your child your dissatisfaction behavior through facial expressions and a strict voice.

It is advisable to block each blow with an interception, fix an arm or leg in the air and say out loud that this is not the way to behave.

If there is no desired response warn the child of a subsequent retaliation on your part, if the child does not stop the attacks.

At the end of the acute phase of the manifestation of aggression, find out the cause of its occurrence and exclude factors to prevent relapse.

It is important to get from the environment (husband, other relatives) that they pursued a policy of resistance child and humane stopping aggression, and did not cheer him up with statements like: “So she! Well, give it a go! Here's a naughty mom, come on, come on, spank her."

For a baby aged from one to three years, mother is the center of the universe, the dearest and closest person. Joy or indignation, happiness or grief - all the emotions and experiences children pass on to their mother and only then to other family members. Some kids periodically beat their mothers, defending their innocence. Should this behavior be considered the norm or a developmental deviation?

Why is a child of 1-3 years old aggressive and beats his mother?

Psychologists have long found out that the psycho-emotional world of a child is much more subtle than it might seem.

Dad doesn't love mom? The child was not long-awaited in the family? Parents raise him in a Spartan way? Or, on the contrary, furiously patronize? Any factor that can cause aggressive behavior.

Possible causes of aggression:

Feeling useless . Children are well aware that they are a burden and a problem for their parents. Intonations and gestures are read by them quickly on a subconscious level. By aggression, the child proves that he has the right to exist in the family as a full-fledged member of it.
Relationship on the brink of divorce . Constant conflicts between parents, showdowns, unstable environment, disrespectful attitude towards each other make the child suffer and look for a way out. Over time, he can grow into a manipulator with an aggressive behavior model.
Disrespect for a child . Children feel very much if they are constantly put in their place, their requests are ignored, in a word they are not put into anything. Aggression is the protection of the child from such an attitude towards himself.
Total control . There are parents who keep their children in tight rein. But children perceive this as a suppression of the personality and react aggressively. As you know, the best defense is an attack.
Care environment . In a family where dad and mom literally wrap the child with their care, a rather aggressive child can grow up. Why? The child becomes simply spoiled and does not know the refusal of his requests.
attention deficit . Busy parents often “brush off” their children or pay off with expensive toys. The child subconsciously feels that he has been forgotten and begins to behave inappropriately.
Fear . Anxiety and fear can cause a desire to protest and, as a result, the beginning of aggression.

Is it worth it or not to fight a pugnacious child? Of course, you can try to survive the "pugnacious" period. Very often, with age, a child stops fighting with his parents simply because he grows up.

But if you see that the period is dragging on, take action.

How to wean a child 1-3 years old to beat his mother - the best ways to extinguish aggression

Name	Age	Description
Playing in the sand	1 to 3	Let the child often playing in the sandbox , builds castles, fortresses, digs ditches. Then invite him to bomb the building to throw out a fit of anger. Replacing the sandbox at home can be kinetic sand , playing with cereals (for example, buckwheat) or any bulk materials. At home, you can offer the child sprinkle cereals from one jar to another, pick up in a spatula, touch with handles, pour into some water, and so on. Such activities perfectly soothe, and in parallel, develop fine motor skills.
name-callers	3 years	Offer to play a game - name calling. Pass the ball like a hot potato game calling any inoffensive "call name" . For example, suggest using the names of vegetables as names. “Beetroot, carrot, watermelon” - the range of words can be wide. The game will amuse, and at the same time enrich the vocabulary of the baby.
Sheep game	2-3 years	According to psychologists game form "butting" helps the child legally throw out aggression. Get on your knees, rest your foreheads against each other and say "be". From time to time, reincarnating as a lamb, the child will feel much calmer, because adults in the game help him to splash out energy in the right direction .
Pillow fight	1 to 3 years	Children love pillow fight ! In the meantime, this is not at all mischief, but a way to get rid of the accumulated anger. An adult can give meaning to the game if he comes up with a plot. "Indian Fights" or "Battle of the Brave Pirates" will surely be of interest to children. The option of playing with a child from a year old can be playful fight with inflatable hammers .
drawing	2-3 years	Suggest to the child draw your anger , depicting in the form of a fabulous kolobok. Let the child make a scary, funny face. Noticed: over time, he will learn to "draw" his outbursts of anger.

Common Parenting Mistakes

Psychologist Anastasia Umanskaya's advice on what not to do if the baby beats his mother:

The child is given back . Even a symbolic and mild blow in response only convinces the baby of the correctness of the chosen tactics of behavior. It assumes the model is normal and will use it from time to time.
pretending to cry . A small child in a year or 2 may really like that his actions cause such a reaction in his mother. It cannot be ruled out that the little robber will start beating his mother in order to see her tears later. The same applies to strong screams, screams (supposedly from pain), and so on.
Shame on such behavior . A child between the ages of 1 and 3 does not yet realize what shame is, so your words will not be heard.

In any situation, try to find a compromise with the child. , do not react to fights with categorical prohibitions, shouts (and even more so retaliatory strikes).

Find an acceptable way to let your baby vent to his feelings and emotions. : enroll him in a development center, take him to sports.
Make sure that everything, with outdoor games, bright and saturated . It is possible that the child will splash out energy and over time, the desire to fight with his mother will come to naught.
Try to explain to the child about the inadmissibility of such behavior. . The older he gets, the more often you need to remind him about and explain in a calm and even voice. Increased tone on the part of parents, intemperance and emotionality can only exacerbate the problem.

Be patient, kind and indulgent, and very soon the little robber will please you with exemplary behavior.

We have already discussed the following topics:

For a detailed analysis of this issue, see the video: "Children's aggression."

As you can see, we have answered the question “Why and why?” in detail, and now we will deal with another burning question:

“What to do if a child beats parents”

I want to note right away that we will talk about children under the age of 3-3.5 years. It is during this period that the issue of child aggression is usually particularly acute. Why so, you can read in the topic about.

The first precedents usually occur when a one-year-old child fights. In these situations, most often the child beats the mother. Because it is the mother in this period who is the closest person to him. Often this happens simply from overwhelming emotions of the baby. After all, a child in a year cannot yet assess whether he is hurting another. And therefore it happens that from overflowing emotions the child clings to the mother SO much that it hurts her to tears.

In such situations, one must understand that the child does not hurt the mother on purpose. Or there may be another option: the child hits the parents in the face for joy, or he is just wondering how this happens.

The task of adults in this case:
1. Accurate feedback. Many parents laugh when such a small child hits them. After all, often it doesn’t even hurt, but from the outside it looks funny (like a Pug on an Elephant). But with our fun, we show the child that we approve of his behavior.

And why then be surprised if such "entertainment" is fixed later? It is very important to correctly show your emotions to the child. If a child hit his mother, hurt her, she should be upset, say about it in words that she usually says to a child when it hurts. After all, how else will he learn to understand the consequences of his actions?!

Secondly, it is necessary to think over distracting maneuvers.

Sometimes it happens that even if there are not many prohibitions, the child still stubbornly tries to break them. We need to figure out how we can distract him, come up with an alternative.

Well, for example, you have an active kid who likes to climb on the back or side of the sofa and jump from there to the seat. Of course, every time you have a heart attack, because. the child may roll onto the floor. And when you forbid it, the child starts to fight.

Solution: Find something safe that's just as fun to jump on. It can be a sports mat or an old mattress, or special soft large pillows. As a result, the child is happy, the mother is calm.

How to react if the child hits the mother?

Many parents admit that they do not know how to respond in such a situation.

1. If a child fights with parents constantly, then it is quite possible to predict such behavior. You can intercept your hand during the swing and very strictly, but without anger, say that you can’t fight. In this case, eye contact is very important.

Then you voice the child’s emotions (“I understand that you are upset”), explain the reason for the ban (“we need to go to bed now, otherwise we won’t be able to go for a walk in the evening and won’t see your friends”), give an alternative or “lure” (“ let’s go to bed soon, there you are already waiting for, probably, a dream about Luntik”). Repeat if necessary.

2. To beat a child in response, I personally consider it an extreme measure. Sometimes it works, but very often it looks like this: mother and daughter are sitting. The girl beats her mother, she in response hits her daughter on the arm and says: “You can’t fight!” The girl beats her mother again... history repeats itself. The girl learns from the situation: “You can fight, because mom fights.” You can't argue with that. I still understand this situation if a mother beats a child a little and says: “Look, it hurts you, but it hurts me too when you beat me.”

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Irina Terentyeva: “I help raise happy children!”

“Children are the best motivation for self-improvement!

Everyone parent He wants to raise his child to be a kind and polite person. But many parents of babies who still can’t even speak notice that their little one, when he disagrees with something, hits mom and dad with small hands in the face. He still does not perceive the arguments that it hurts his parents. A rare parent leaves such a child’s behavior unattended, many give quietly “change” with the words: “Oh, you little fighter, you too!”. But this is the wrong method of education, so parents nurture the bad inclinations of the baby, of course, out of good intentions.

one year old baby punches mom and dad in the face to understand how a clash of interests occurs and how conflicts are resolved. Having hit in the face, he carefully looks into the eyes of the parent and studies how he will behave in such a situation. If mom or dad, satisfied with the courage of the crumbs, smile, then the baby perceives this as praise and decides for himself: using force, you can become good. To explain in words to parents what he wants, the baby still at this age cannot. And so, when his parents insist that he act differently, as he planned, he is indignant, kicks and throws toys. Do not be afraid of such behavior of the child and do not need to punish him.

It is very important in this age make it clear to the child that mom and dad are people like him, they also get hurt and sad. In a serious voice, try to explain to the baby that you can’t do this and that his act greatly upset you. As a sign of punishment, stop playing with him or reading him a fairy tale. Seeing that you were upset and offended by him, the baby will not do this next time. Despite the fact that your child is still very young, it is time to teach him to restrain his feelings. If expressing his anger, the baby kicks his legs and throws toys, then hug him tightly in an armful and hold him until he calms down. The kid will buckle a little, cry and start playing again, as before. So you will help him translate anger into tears and the child will understand that anger can be experienced without showing aggression, but simply by sharing problems with parents.

So that the child does not grow aggressive, from an early age he must be taught compassion. For example, if a baby has torn off a butterfly's wings or is dragging a cat by its tail, do not scold him or hit him on the hands. Here it is necessary to act in such a way that the child himself realizes that he has caused harm and sincerely regrets it. For example, tell him that the butterfly flew home to her children, and now his children were left without a mother. Invite the child to imagine how he would feel if he was being dragged by the legs by older children, just like he was a cat. If parents every time ignore the child’s bad attitude not only towards pets, but also towards other children or relatives, then the child’s aggressiveness and cruelty will become fixed, and in adolescence they will become habitual for his behavior.

Unfortunately, some instructions bring up a good child is impossible. In 90% of cases, children copy the behavior of their parents. Even small children are very sensitive to any falsehood, and if mom or dad is rude to their parents, constantly swears at each other, fights and shows disrespect for elders, then rest assured that the child will do the same. And if a mother constantly tells a child about the need to be polite and kind, and she herself yells at him, gossips with her friends and swears with obscene words in the presence of a child, then her upbringing is worthless.

Therefore, in order to prevent aggressive the relationship of the child to his parents, it is necessary from the day he was born to reconsider his behavior: learn to treat others with respect, greet and communicate with neighbors, not sort things out among themselves and not discuss the actions of people close to you in the presence of children. Aggressive children most often grow up in families where the father or mother severely punishes the child for any offense. Children who suffered greatly in childhood from parental abuse, in adolescence take out their aggression on other children. And if such a child is still left without parental supervision, then once in a group of older children, he can do such monstrous things in their cruelty that parents cannot even imagine how their child is capable of this.

Every day they show us on TV examples cruelty of modern teenagers. They brutally beat, rape and mutilate their peers, filming it all on video and posting it on the Internet. It seems to us that we have reached the peak of teenage cruelty and aggression. In fact, children are our reflection. The roots of teenage cruelty lie in the inattention and indifference of modern parents.

Today, in many families there is no parent authority, spouses are more busy sorting out the relationship between themselves and making money. Aggressive often become children who in other ways could not reach the heart of mom or dad. This is their revenge on their parents for their dislike. And the specific recipe for the right upbringing of a child is very simple: spend 2 times less money on children and 2 times more time.

Source:
How to react if the child hits the mother
How to react if the baby hits mom and dad in the face? What is the cause of the aggressive behavior of the child?
http://meduniver.com/Medical/Psixology/v_chem_prichina_agressivnogo_povedenia_rebenka.html

Very often, small children beat their parents (most often their mother, because she is always there). And this happens for a variety of reasons, which are most often explained by age-related changes.

It is worth noting that babies often copy the behavior of adults, exactly repeating their behavior model.. Therefore, if a child beats mom or dad, you need to pay attention to yourself, first of all. If there is violence towards each other in the house, then it will not be surprising that the baby will copy this model of relationships.

It is also worth paying attention to what films and videos are viewed with the child. Videos of a mother beating a child, videos of adults fighting among themselves, even if all this is shown in the context of a movie (drama or action movie), can cause the development of unmotivated aggression, which is quite problematic to nullify without the help of child psychologists.

Most often, a child hits his mother in the face, while still a baby.. During this period of time, the baby is not yet aware of what he is doing, and pats on the cheeks, albeit painful for the mother, are perceived by him as a game.

It is very important from the first months of life to show the child what is acceptable and what is abnormal and wrong. And hitting a parent in the face is not the norm. When a baby slaps his mother in the face, you need to tell him in a rather strict tone that this is wrong and not good. Despite the fact that babies under one year old cannot clearly express their thoughts in words, they understand parental intonation very well.

Child psychologists note that after the first blow to the face, in response to which verbal discontent of the mother or father followed, the child strikes a second blow in order to understand what exactly caused the negative. At this moment, it is important to intercept the baby’s hand or fist, pressing it to the face, stroking your cheek with a child’s hand. This tactile experience can be supplemented with words with explanations of how good and how not.

In a child, such a model will be clearly deposited in the mind, therefore, the older he is, the easier it will be to control and transform his aggression. Naturally, the parents of the baby should also control themselves! Many mothers from an overabundance of feelings strive to bite or pinch the baby. Such a model is also deposited in memory and consciousness, which may not lead to the most pleasant consequences in the future.

During this period of time, babies already perceive quite well not only intonation but also the meaning of what their parents tell them. Unfortunately, children still do not know how to control their emotions and aggression, and therefore express them in all available ways. Including the fight.

A one-year-old child hits his mother in the face not in order to hurt her or make her uncomfortable, but simply because he does not yet know how to express his emotions in a different way. And at this moment it is important to show and say that fights are bad, that this cannot be done. At the same time, you can convey the idea to the child in different ways: take it off your hands, cry, change the intonation of your voice to a more threatening one.

Definitely not to hit the kid back, even if not hard. First of all, you can't fight! This is what a child needs to be taught, and it is easiest to do this on your own (adult) example. Secondly, there is always a risk of scaring an overly impressionable baby, after which his nervous system may “fail”.

Kindergarten educators strongly recommend using the “corner” punishment as a clear demonstration of “what is bad and impossible”. The kid is put in a corner, explaining what exactly he is punished for. And in the case of a fight, when a child (1.5 years old) beats his mother, this will be the most “useful” punishment. Although the kids are not too diligent and it is quite difficult to keep them in the corner, this method is very effective.

Very often, a two-year-old child beats his mother when he is psychotic, nervous and dissatisfied with something.. During this period of time, psychologists recommend talking in a calm tone so that the main idea reaches the baby - to do so badly. If a child hit the face, hands, stomach, it is necessary to indicate to him that it hurts and unpleasantly for mom or dad, and then stroke the place of the blow with a child's hand. Over time, such tactics will lead to the fact that the baby, instead of aggression, will express affection towards the parents.

Often a child at 2 years old beats mom or dad because of excess energy. In this case, you need to properly plan his day, where enough time will be allotted for active and outdoor games. This is especially true for restless and hyperactive kids who cannot sit in one place for a long time. In addition, you need to set aside enough time for calm games and activities that will develop diligence.

Toddlers who attend kindergarten often face internal children's conflicts.. And many kids solve their childhood and, by their standards, serious problems with the help of a fight and assault.

At home, this line of behavior persists when the child cannot get what he wants or in a fit of aggression and anger. If a child at the age of 3 beats his mother out of anger, then it is worth redirecting such negative energy into something more peaceful and useful. For example, to buy a toy punching bag and gloves, showing the baby that you can take out your anger on it (pear), but you can’t take it out on mom and dad. This method works for both girls and boys. Discharging energy and aggression on an inanimate object that is meant to be hit really makes fighters less likely to use their fists in public.

If a child at the age of 4 beats mom or dad in cases where he cannot get what he wants, then you should definitely punish the baby. Do not give back or miss such behavior, but punish - get offended and stop talking, put in a corner or take away your favorite toy for some agreed time (for example, until the child realizes what he is wrong about, and until he apologizes for it).

A child (5 years old) who beats mom or dad most often requires attention to his person. And this attention should be paid to him - first by a dialogue about why he allows himself to fight with his parents. Having learned the reason for such behavior from the lips of the baby himself, it is easier to choose an approach to him, nullifying such bouts of assault.

Very often, parents cannot understand why a child hits mom or dad.. And if at preschool age it is most often a manifestation of emotions that children cannot always express in words, then younger students fight quite consciously. The main reason is anger or aggression, formed by some kind of parental prohibitions.

If a child at the age of 11 beats his mother, then such behavior cannot be let go of him. What to do in this case? First of all, conduct an educational conversation in a dialogue mode in order to understand what exactly the child is not happy with, what justifies his behavior. After that, it is imperative to punish in a mild form of non-contact "violence" (remove your favorite book, magazine or toy).

Especially active children-fighters should definitely be enrolled in sports sections, where they will throw out their aggression, excess energy and replace the raging hormones with ordinary physical fatigue. Best suited for fighters: swimming, running, outdoor games (football, basketball, volleyball and others).

Source:
How to behave if the child hits the mother
What to do if the child hits the mother? It is imperative to understand the reason for such aggression and carry out preventive measures to prevent the child from hitting his mother.
http://moeditya.com/razvitie/vospitanie/rebenok-bet-mamu

The baby fights and hits the mother in the face: what to do?

No matter how you surround your child with love and affection, the baby will still someday - accidentally or intentionally - hit you. How to react correctly when a baby hits mom in the face, and how to behave with a baby so that this does not happen again?

At first, the baby hits the mother in the face and thus causes pain not on purpose, but gradually his actions become conscious. The child fights with relatives and children, thereby expressing his emotions.

Of course, your reaction to the first case should be correct and pedagogical. After all, if you simply smile in response to a painful blow, the baby will learn that “beating” gives you pleasure. In order for the baby to understand for himself that hitting his mother is wrong, you will need to do consistent educational work.

A child in the first year only learns to communicate with others and gradually learns the rules of interaction with people. By itself, the child cannot understand them, so your goal is to explain to him every minute what actions are allowed and what is prohibited. At the same time, it is important to approach this issue carefully and seriously. If a child beats his mother or loved ones, offends pets or fights in the sandbox, you must strictly suppress such behavior. There should not be any "discounts" for an unreasonable age, otherwise the baby will learn in the first year that such actions are acceptable, and will always behave aggressively.

First of all, you must teach the baby to express emotions correctly. If the baby beats you, unable to cope with the positive emotions that overwhelmed him, intercept the hand, wait until the child calms down and demonstrate that mom needs to be hugged and stroked. To consolidate the result, repeat the actions with close and large soft toys.

When a child fights because he is angry, you need to redirect his anger into tears. Hold the baby firmly in your arms so that he cannot harm you, and wait until his irritability turns into crying, and then calm him down. The child soon enough will understand that anger can be expressed in other ways, and will cease to be so aggressive.

In the first year, you must help the baby cope with unstable emotions and direct them in the right direction. The child still does not understand well what he feels and how he should respond to these sensations, and your task is to teach him to get rid of this correctly.

To avoid the manifestation of the aggressive behavior of the baby due to frequent prohibitions, you need to reduce the percentage of the word “no” in your communication with the baby. Move the things he shouldn't touch higher up and make the space as secure as possible. If the baby behaves badly in the store, go there without him, leaving him under the supervision of other mothers with strollers, or move the “shopping” time to the evening, when your relatives who have returned from work can replace you at home.

For “forbidden” activities, it is imperative to look for an alternative replacement that will suit both you and the baby:

if he likes to play with your keys, and you are afraid that he will lose them - “make” your own set of keys from old locks;
if the baby enthusiastically clicks door handles and locks - attach old or inexpensive locks to plywood, and let the baby play with them for fun;
a baby who loves to jump on the sofa can arrange a safe corner where a one-year-old child can jump freely without the risk of injury.

So that the baby does not grow up aggressive, it is important to teach him compassion in time. When a child hits you, a loved one or an innocent animal, you must explain to him that he acted badly and caused pain to a living being. Tell your child as emotionally as possible how a person feels when he was hit, and try to get regret from the crumbs about what was done.

Monitor your behavior and that of your loved ones. After all, a child can simply copy someone's behavior. Noticing that his parents do not respect elders, swear, beat each other, the baby will repeat what he saw, considering this to be the norm. Also, the baby can copy the behavior of an older brother or sister, a sandbox kid who fights and is never punished for it. Think about whether there is a reason for the aggressive behavior of the child in others, and try to correct the situation.