Wedding candles: from preparation for the sacrament to family concerns. Wedding candles and what to do with them

Many newlyweds are concerned about the question of what to do after the wedding with wedding candles or a towel? Store carefully? But not everyone is sentimental. Throw away? The hand does not go up. After all, these objects are witnesses of the sacred sacrament that connected you with your loved one!.. And what do the traditions say?

wedding candles

Church candles have a special symbolism. It's not just a light dancing on the end of a wax stick! A burning candle is the embodiment of our faith, fiery prayers and requests with which we turn to God. And in your case, it is also a sign of marriage, which absorbed happy emotions, hopes and dreams that overwhelmed the hearts of the young at the altar. Is it possible to burn it or throw it away like an ordinary cinder?! Even if both spouses are inveterate pragmatists, they are unlikely to decide on such an act.

What should be done after the wedding in the church with this important attribute of the sacrament? Traditions prescribe to take the candles home, carefully wrap them with a clean handkerchief and leave behind the icon, which the parents blessed the young for marriage. However, which of the images to choose and the method of storage depends on the desire of the spouses. You can do without a scarf or, for example, pack the cinders in a paper bag, away from dust and direct sun rays. The main thing is to find a clean and pious place for storage - it is undesirable to use a drawer or kitchen cabinet.

Whenever a quarrel arises between the spouses, one of them becomes ill or will be forced to go on a long business trip, the candles are taken out from behind the icons and not for a long time ignite. Exactly enough to pray heartily for your soulmate, and, looking at the light, resurrect in your heart the feeling of unity and joy that you experienced in the church.

Wedding candles are kept in the family all their lives, and when the time comes for the spouses to go to another world, the cinders are placed in a coffin or burned. You did not know about the custom and burned both candles? Don't worry, trouble won't happen. Although this is an important symbol of family union, it does not determine happiness in marriage, but God's grace and mutual efforts of husband and wife.

Towel

And what to do with the towel after the wedding? There are even more options here:

• Use it as a napkin under the wedding icons - both elegant and a worthy place for an iconic item.
• Fold and put away in the closet to take out during the celebration of important family dates. In the old days, it was the norm to pass skillfully embroidered colorful wedding towels from parents to children, and even today a lot of people support this glorious tradition. Maybe it will take root in your family too?
• Take it to the temple. There, the towel will be given to less wealthy couples or used at the discretion of the clergyman.

What to do with a towel after the wedding so that it serves to strengthen the marriage? Just like candles, a wedding towel is taken out in moments of strife and sorrow. Some lie down and cover their heads, some put them under the pillow. Others stare intently at the bright patterns of the towel, while reading a prayer or remembering the pleasant moments of marriage. One way or another, the meaning is always the same: to calm down, be in silence and try to tune in to a peaceful way. A moment of respite taken in time can bring to naught the conflict that has flared up and strengthen the spiritual strength of a person in the hour of trial.

What you can not do after the wedding is to fall into fetishism. Tradition by tradition, but also common sense nobody canceled. If it so happened that candles, a towel or other thing left by you as a memory of holiday, were lost, on the quality family life it won't affect it in any way. Your family happiness depends on you, and not on a piece of wax or a piece of cloth.

THE MYSTERY OF MARRIAGE.

Why is it necessary to get married at the time of marriage?
In Christianity, the family is called the "little church." From this point of view, relationships within the family are seen not just as everyday, everyday. The family is a Christian mystery, and it is not for nothing that it begins with the Sacrament of Marriage, it exists by the grace of this Sacrament and draws strength from it.
In the Sacrament of Marriage, the Church blesses the bride and groom for a life together, for the birth and upbringing of children. The bride and groom must at the same time promise God that they will be faithful to each other all their lives.
After the priest pronounces the sacramental words three times: Lord our God, crown me (them) with glory and honor and bless the bride and groom, they become husband and wife. From now on they are no longer two different person, but “one flesh”, which no one can and should not try to separate or destroy. What God has joined together, let no man separate, we read in the Gospel (Matt. 19:6). Separation of spouses is a sin not only before the children who were born to them, but also before God and His Church
What does the Church say about the duties of spouses?
The Church of Christ offers in the apostolic reading, which is due at marriage, the true teaching about the mutual duties of husband and wife. The marriage union, according to the word of God, is a great mystery (Eph. 5:32): it reflects the spiritually gracious union of Christ the Savior and His Church.
A husband must love his wife as Christ loves the Church: love unfailingly until the end of his life, love until he is ready to suffer and die for her. The wife, along with love for her husband, must have obedience. Although, according to the teaching of the Church, the husband is given power, his primacy is not an advantage, but a duty.
Such love is able to endure all the hardships in life, able to make amends for the dissimilarity of characters, and the difference in external qualities, and various shortcomings.
“It is difficult for one to stand alone in a strong and saving union. The threads of nature are torn - grace is irresistible. Arrogance is dangerous everywhere, especially here. Therefore, humbly, with fasting and prayer, approach the Sacrament,” advised those intending to marry St. Theophan the Recluse.
How to adequately prepare for the Sacrament?
On the wedding day, it is customary to serve a prayer service to the Lord Jesus Christ for the blessing of a good deed. Parents bless those preparing to marry: the groom with the icon of the Savior, the bride with the icon of the Virgin.
On the day of the wedding, the bride and groom confess, pray at the liturgy and partake of the Holy Mysteries of Christ.
Is it necessary to get married after registration?
Since church marriage is a Sacrament in which the power of Divine grace operates, and not just a beautiful ceremony, those entering into marriage should treat it consciously and responsibly. Based on this, the Church considers it necessary to make sure of the seriousness of the intentions of those entering into marriage and currently performs the sacrament of marriage only after the marriage is registered in the registry office. If the registration and the wedding are separated by some period of time, then before the church marriage, one should refrain from marital relations.
Does the Church recognize civil marriage?
Marriage made through state registration, Russian Orthodox Church considers it valid (though not sufficient for spouses who profess Orthodox faith) and treat him with respect. If we are talking about a connection that is not secured by any state act, then the Church identifies these completely irresponsible relationships as fornication and considers them sinful.
Is it possible to get married to spouses who have been married for a long time, registered in the registry office, but not married?
The Church never refuses the grace of the Sacrament, even if the spouses are in old age. Often they take the meaning of the Sacrament more seriously, prepare more responsibly for it, and make a decision about getting married after a serious period: reviewing their lives, gaining the true faith and becoming churched.
Does the Church allow second marriage?
The Orthodox Church considers a marriage entered into in the Church to be fundamentally indissoluble. Only adultery (violation of marital fidelity) is a complete canonical basis for the dissolution of a church marriage, tk. adultery actually destroys a marriage. It should be remembered, however, that this dissolution is not a "debunking", that is, a sacred ceremony, the opposite of a wedding, but only a recognition of the fact of the destruction of marriage.
The dissolution of a church marriage is the prerogative of the church court, which is headed by the diocesan bishop. Only after that the Church blesses the innocent spouse to enter into a second marriage.
Second marriage is allowed by the Church only in condescension to human infirmities, therefore prayers of repentance are added to the following for second marriages.
What should be done with wedding candles after the wedding?
The pious Russian custom involves the careful storage of wedding candles as a memory of the Sacrament of Marriage. Sometimes they are placed in the kiot of the icon, which they received as a blessing from their parents for marriage. Wedding candles can be lit for a short time during separation from a spouse or family discord. The flame of the wedding candle will remind the spouse who has forgotten about love how happy he was on his wedding day, remind him of the need to save his family with all his might. According to the ancient Russian custom, wedding candles are placed in the coffin of the spouse who died last.
It should be remembered: the wedding does not take place
- during all four multi-day fasts;
- during the Cheese Week (Shrovetide);
- on the Bright (Easter) Week;
- from the Nativity of Christ (January 7) to Epiphany (January 19);
- on the eve of the twelfth holidays;
- on Tuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays throughout the year;
- September 10, 11, 26 and 27 in connection with a strict fast for the sake of the Beheading of John the Baptist and the Exaltation of the Holy Cross);
- on the eve of the patronal temple days (each temple has its own).

The wedding process is a beautiful, memorable act aimed at concluding the union of two lovers before the Lord. It is necessary to consciously approach the decision to get married.

There is no need to pay tribute to fashion, you need to come to such a decision on your own without anyone's pressure. Many believe that it is the wedding that will help save the marriage for many years, and the family will live happily and not know grief.

During the wedding process, special rituals and rituals are performed, wedding candles are used, illuminated rings are put on the fingers of the newlyweds as a sign of love and fidelity. That's just the same wedding candles you need to take care of for the rest of your life. They are believed to have supernatural power, which will protect the family of all its members from diseases and other misfortunes.

Like candles, wedding towels should not be left in the church, they should be kept at home, as a symbol of the one path that one walks on. married couple. The dress that the woman was wearing at the wedding should also be kept. It is best to buy a simple, but your own dress, rather than rent it. The clothes we wear are charged with our energy. That's White dress bride absorbs the energy of the wedding, and then the woman begins to transfer her happiness from hand to hand to each owner of her dress. There is a mixture of energy.

Wedding suits, dresses, icons, candles, rings - all these attributes are carriers of powerful energy. It is to their help that you need to resort in case of misfortune in the family. If the spouse, wife, children get sick, you need to put on a suit, pray for wedding icons, light wedding candles. What to do with them then? After asking for help, they need to be extinguished and put away in a safe place. It is believed that in this way a person is able to change the line of his destiny in the right direction or return to the path of well-being and health. All these wedding things should be carefully stored and no one should be allowed near them, they will come in handy in many difficult life situations.

It is not uncommon when magicians and sorcerers ask people who turned to them for help to bring wedding items to a magical session. The bride and groom should not give their dresses to measure to another person. This also applies to wedding rings, which are considered a symbol of the bonding of marriage and its well-being. Golden rings of spouses are talismans, guardians from the evil eye and damage. Therefore, they must be worn without removing. Wedding rings cannot be inherited, because this is how a person passes on his fate.

During the wedding ceremony, candles are lit one from the other over the heads of the newlyweds. Thus, the chakras of the spouses merge together. The candles are then lowered down to connect all the other chakras together.

It is necessary to keep candles until death and then put them in the coffin of the spouse who died last. It is believed that the birth of the first child will be safer if you light wedding candles. It is best to light them in front of the icons, which also participated in the ceremony. Yes, and just look at the burning candles and remember the minutes when the union of two loving hearts fastened in heaven, very reverently.

There are even wedding love spells using candles. I need to buy two wedding candles on Friday morning. In your head, imagine the image of your chosen one or chosen one. Then tie the candles with red thread and set fire to it. The flame must be one. This should be monitored carefully.

Wedding candles - a talisman for the whole joint married life. If there was some kind of discord, conflict, or the husband left for another, you need to learn how to burn church candles at home. The flame of fire will make the spouses remember all their happy moments life together to re-experience that great love for each other.

During the wedding, you can follow the burning of candles. If the flame is calm, then life will be smooth. If a crack is heard, then troubles cannot be avoided. The candles went out - the imminent collapse of the marriage or the death of one of the spouses.

Records found: 7

Hello. My husband and I are married, but it was not the way it should be. Firstly, we did not take communion and did not go to confession, and secondly, we were late after the registry office, and our wedding was significantly reduced; the granny who sold the candles yelled and scolded us for being late, and brought us to tears - but the ceremony was still held. You can describe the situation in detail for a long time - in general, my husband and I did not expect what we got at all (although I in no way diminish our guilt with him). Is it possible to get married again in another church if we really want to?

Alla

Hello Allah! You cannot remarry. The sacrament was performed, regardless of the circumstances in which it took place. God's grace is poured out on everyone equally, and it depends on us how much we can accommodate. Actually, such significant event like a wedding, rarely passes without temptations. In your case, this is your lateness, bad manners serving in the temple. And it happens that the priest is an hour late due to traffic jams. Joint confession and communion is a tradition. If you would go to the temple more often, you would do this too. But now there is no need to think that something was done wrong. Take more care that you have a strong Orthodox family, go to church and take communion together. So do many spouses.

Priest Vladimir Shlykov

Good afternoon! From my parents (unfortunately, they are no longer there), there were wedding candles, rings and my mother's wedding dress. Should these candles be lit, or just kept? Can you wash your wedding dress?

Marina

Marina. Wedding candles can be lit and stored - at your discretion. The wedding dress is also washable.

Hieromonk Viktorin (Aseev)

Good afternoon! Please tell me how to store and how wedding candles can help? Thank you!

Dmitry

Dmitry, Wedding candles are stored next to the icons or in a holy corner. By themselves, wedding candles can not help. God, the Mother of God and the Saints help us when we turn to Them in prayer, and at the same time our life must be Christian, built according to the Divine commandments. Wedding candles can be lit at home on major church holidays.

Hieromonk Viktorin (Aseev)

Hello! Tell me, please, my husband and I have been married for 10 years, now we are expecting a child. We want to get married, can we do it now? If so, how to properly prepare for this sacrament? To our shame, we are not parishioners (baptized), we occasionally go to services. They asked in the temple, they said - sign up three days before the date, fast for three days the day before, confess and take communion. I thought, for this you need to first come to a conversation with the priest? And there are other questions: what clothes are acceptable, what wedding rings can be purchased, how to choose the day according to the calendar on which the wedding takes place (they asked at the reception, they didn’t give us anything specific), they wanted October 13, but there is 14 Intercession, they asked , we were not answered whether there would be weddings on that day. So I am writing here, please excuse me for disturbing you. If you can, clear things up a bit for us. Thank you! And another question, can the guests at the wedding be unharmed? Thank you all the best!!!

Svetlana

Hello Svetlana! The wedding is the sacrament of the Church, in which God gives the future spouses, when they promise to be faithful to each other, the grace of pure unanimity for joint Christian life, birth and upbringing of children. By crowning, the Church unites people for their mutual help and growth in love for God and for each other. So that together they learn to fulfill the commandments of the Gospel and teach this to their children. If the spouses approach the wedding with such a goal, then God helps them to endure all life's hardships together and maintain mutual love. Those wishing to get married must be believers, baptized Orthodox Christians. They should be deeply aware that the unauthorized dissolution of a marriage approved by God, as well as the violation of the vow of fidelity, is an absolute sin. Weddings are not performed: on Tuesday, Thursday, Saturday, on the eve of the great twelfth and temple holidays, on the eve and during multi-day fasts, during Christmas time, Cheese and Bright Week, on the feasts of the Exaltation of the Cross and the Beheading of John the Baptist. For the wedding, you must prepare two icons: the Savior and the Mother of God, with which the Church will bless you after the Sacrament, two wedding candles and a long new towel. You can take your wedding rings, but if you wish, buy gold or silver, you can buy in the temple with the words "Save and Save." Clothing should correspond to the solemnity of the event, be strict and not too frank. Women are required to wear a headdress. Make-up should be modest, without lipstick on the lips, as you will be touching sacred objects. Women are not allowed to participate in the Sacrament during critical days. Before the wedding, prepare for confession and communion. You can take communion the day before or on the day of the sacrament, whichever is more convenient for you. But it is still advisable to talk to the priest in order to find out the nuances. If this cannot be done on a duty day, then you can go to the priest for confession.

Priest Vladimir Shlykov

Good afternoon! Tell me, please, how to be. When I got married, my parents blessed my future husband and I at home with the icon of Kazan Mother of God with a towel. The parents of the husband did not bless, in their opinion this is an extra archaism. After some time we got married. And we got a towel, a wedding couple, and candles in the church. Now we have a wedding couple at home (with the image of Jesus Christ and the Kazan Mother of God), and another icon with the image of the Kazan Mother of God, with which my parents blessed us. Would it be correct to put them together (we have one red corner for icons at home)? And what is the right thing to do in this case?

Evgenia

Evgenia, it will be very good if all your icons are together. And don't forget to pray before them.

Hieromonk Viktorin (Aseev)

Hello, Abbot Nikon (Golovko), Christ is Risen! Tell me, please, where are the wedding icons placed in the house? I found information that wedding candles should be carefully kept all their lives and lit during prayer in difficult moments of life, is this true? Explain, please, what does the requirement mean and at what moments is it ordered in the Church? Approximately 2 months ago, I said that if I succeed in the business I started, I will file my gold chain for the Church. It worked out, with the help of the Lord, but I don’t know how to do it! Can you just put it in the begging box? Please reply to my email. address, thank you! Thank you for everything! God bless you!

Svetlana

Svetlana, wedding icons should be placed in the red corner, along with all the other icons, maybe even at the head of the corner. As for candles, you were rightly told that they can be lit in prayer at difficult moments in life. Trebs are those divine services - prayers, memorial services, the sacraments of baptism, weddings, confessions and others - which are performed at the request, demand of the parishioners. As for your donation, it is best to give it personally to the rector of the temple or the headman.

hegumen Nikon (Golovko)

Good evening. My husband and I got married. And at the very beginning of the wedding, when the priest led us to the lectern, the candle in my hand went out. I lit it from my husband's candle and it never went out again. I came home, read a lot of unpleasant things and was very upset. A sign of death, and in general, not a very good one. And we are expecting a baby and somehow I was very excited. Please tell me how should I feel about this? Thanks in advance for your reply.

Pauline

Hello Polina! I congratulate you on such a great sacrament. Do not doubt anything and fear only the Lord God. Believing in omens is a sin.

Priest Vladimir Shlykov

Hieromonk Seraphim (Kalugin), Astrakhan, answers questions from readers.

I have a question for you. How can you influence your husband with the help of wedding candles or prayers (and what kind of prayers). My husband and I have been married for 6 years, we are married, our families are very religious people. I was him faithful wife, a year ago he cheated on me, I forgave him, but the problem is that he filed for divorce (threatening me), because he wants to leave me for that girl. But I love him very much and want to live only with him, I see from him that he also hesitates, we have been toiling for a year already. I suspect that she somehow bewitched him, he loved me very much, and now he is leaving and crying. So, something still remains for me ... How can I help our falling apart family, if I really want to save it, no matter what ... Tell me, please, to me.
Victoria.

Hello Victoria. Indeed, in our damned days, it is becoming increasingly difficult to keep a family together. Corruption and moral decline reach the point where there is no restraint against crimes against the closest, dearest people.
It is impossible to influence a husband with the help of wedding candles, because actions with objects consecrated during the sacrament of the Wedding (candles, footstool, other objects) are witchcraft practice, blasphemous and for Orthodox Christian not acceptable.
Wedding candles are a family relic. A pious custom involves the careful storage of wedding candles as a memory of the Sacrament of Marriage. Sometimes they are placed in the kiot of the icon, which they received as a blessing from their parents for marriage. Wedding candles can be lit for a short time during separation or family discord. It is only necessary to remember that their kindling has power only under the condition of fervent prayer to God for their lost loved ones.
It must also be remembered that a person is mistaken not always because of his malice or hardness of heart, but because of the loss of moral guidelines, which are based on the Gospel commandments. Then he might be easy prey. evil people a mockery for the devil.

The Divine commandment says that only self-sacrificing love leads to happiness: “live in love, as Christ loved us… fornication and all uncleanness and covetousness should not even be named among you… Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the Church and gave Himself up for her.” » (Ephesians 5:2, 3, 25). You just need to believe that there is a solid wall that protects us from worldly troubles and the eternal death of the soul, that the yoke of Christ's commandments is good and light.
One pretty clever man recently told me: “I have a wife, a child, I love them very much, I take care of them, but I got lost. This is a pain that cannot be compared with physical pain. If I were a believer, how easy it would be for me to resolve this situation.
It is customary to pray to the Holy Martyrs Gury, Samon and Aviv to protect the family from all kinds of misfortunes. They are known among Orthodox Christians as patrons of matrimony, marriage, happy family, they are prayed "if the husband innocently hates his wife."
And you, pious women and children, save your souls with patience, because only “he who endures to the end will be saved” (Matthew 24:13).