Phobias that prevent us from living. How to get rid of obsessive fear. How to get rid of a phobia

Many people worry about the smallest things, even if nothing major has happened. Such feelings do not carry anything but anxiety, they destroy nervous system. People who worry a lot cannot live a fulfilling life. They are constantly tense and feel uncomfortable. Turning to psychology, you can understand the essence of these phenomena and get rid of them.


What is the difference between fear and anxiety

Fear and anxiety, both of these phenomena may seem the same at first glance. But in reality, they don't go hand in hand. If unreasonable anxiety destroys the nervous system, then fear, on the contrary, mobilizes the forces of the body.

Imagine that a dog attacked you on the street, the feeling of fear will make you act, take any action to protect yourself. But if you just worry that the dog might attack you, then this will make you feel bad. Excessive feeling of fear also does not lead to anything good.

Feelings of anxiety can vary in degree, from mild to severe. This feeling of anxiety and fear for no reason may depend on the state of the body, on upbringing or hereditary factors. That is why there are people who suffer from phobias, migraines, suspiciousness, etc.



The main causes of anxiety

In this state, a person has an internal conflict that gradually grows and makes him feel bad. Certain factors contribute to this. Consider the causes of fear and anxiety:

  • psychological trauma in the past,
  • annoying actions,
  • suspiciousness of character, when a person is not sure of anything,
  • psychological trauma in childhood, when parents put too much pressure on the child, made excessive demands on him,
  • sedentary image life, malnutrition,
  • starting life in a new place unfamiliar to man,
  • negative events in the past
  • character traits when a pessimistic attitude towards life becomes lifestyle,
  • disorders in the body that destroy the endocrine system and cause hormonal failure.



The destructive effect of anxiety and fear

A person only makes things worse for himself when he constantly lives in a state of anxiety and fear. Not only his psychology suffers, but also his health. When a person experiences a constant feeling of anxiety, his heart begins to beat faster, he does not have enough air, arterial pressure jumps up.

From too strong emotions a person gets very tired, his body wears out faster. There is trembling in the limbs, he cannot fall asleep for a long time, there is pain in the stomach without apparent reason. Many systems of the body suffer in this condition, women experience hormonal disruptions, men have disrupted the genitourinary system. Therefore, it is necessary to know how to get rid of fear and anxiety.



Problem identification

There is no such person who would not be afraid of anything. It is important to realize how much this interferes with life. Each person has their own fears: someone is afraid to speak in public, others have problems communicating with the opposite sex, the following are simply embarrassed by their character, they do not want to show themselves too smart, stupid, etc. By acknowledging your problem, you can begin to fight it and overcome your fear.



Fighting fear and anxiety

There are many ways to get rid of anxiety and fear.

  1. When you feel anxious, there is always tension. And if this tension is removed, then negative feelings will dissipate. To stop constantly worrying, you need to learn to relax. Physical activity helps in this matter, so try to do exercises, but rather get busy physical activity in a team. Walking on fresh air, jogging, breathing exercises will also help fight excessive anxiety.
  2. Share your feelings with loved ones you trust. They will help you dispel the feeling of fear. To other people, other people's fears seem insignificant, and they will be able to convince you of this. Communication with loved ones who love you will remove the burden of problems that have squeezed you. If you do not have such people, then entrust your feelings to the diary.
  3. Don't leave problems unresolved. Many people worry about something but do nothing to change it. Do not leave your problems as they are, start doing at least something to deal with them.
  4. Humor helps us get rid of many problems, defuse tense situations and make us relax. Therefore, communicate with those people who make you laugh a lot. You can also just watch a comedy program, read about something funny. Anything that makes you happy can be used.
  5. Do something that makes you happy. Take your mind off your negative thoughts and call your friends, invite them for a walk or just sit with you in a cafe. Sometimes it's enough just to play computer games, read a fascinating book, you can always find something that gives you pleasure.
  6. Imagine more often a positive outcome of events, and not vice versa. We often worry that something might end badly, and we imagine it in bright colors. Try to do the opposite and imagine that everything ended well. This will help you reduce your anxiety disorder.
  7. Remove everything from your life that creates an anxiety disorder. Usually, watching the news or crime shows, which often talk about something negative, creates an even greater feeling of anxiety. So try not to watch them.



Psychological tricks to help get rid of feelings of fear

Set aside 20 minutes a day for yourself when you can completely surrender to anxiety and think about what worries you the most. You can give yourself free rein and even cry. But when the allotted time comes to an end, forbid yourself to even think about it and get down to your daily activities.

Find quiet place in your apartment, where nothing will bother you. Sit comfortably, relax, breathe deeply. Imagine that in front of you is a burning piece of wood, from which smoke rises into the air. Imagine that this smoke is your anxiety. Watch how it rises into the sky and dissolves into it completely until the piece of wood burns out. Just observe it without trying to influence the movement of the smoke in any way.


Take up needlework. Monotonous work helps to distract from unnecessary thoughts and make life more serene.

Even if you can’t get rid of disturbing thoughts at first, over time you will learn how to do it. Most importantly, follow the advice, and you will gradually become less worried.

Getting rid of fear - advice from psychologists

Psychologists suggest using several tricks to get rid of fear.

  1. Art therapy helps to cope with feelings of fear. Try to draw your fear, express it on paper. Then burn the leaflet with the pattern.
  2. When you experience panic attacks, switch to something else so your feeling doesn't deepen and make you feel bad. Do something else that will absorb all your thoughts and your negative feelings will go away.
  3. Realize the nature of your fear, put it on the shelves. Try to write down everything you feel and worry about, and then light the paper.
  4. Breathing exercise"Inhaling strength and exhaling weakness" will help you get rid of fear. Imagine that as you inhale, courage enters your body, and as you exhale, your body gets rid of fear. You should sit up straight and be relaxed.
  5. Walk towards your fear. If you overcome it by all means, it will help you to worry less. For example, you are afraid to communicate with someone, go and communicate with him. Or, for example, you are terribly afraid of dogs, watch them, try to pet a harmless dog. This is the most effective way which helps to get rid of fear.
  6. When panic and anxiety have completely taken over you, breathe deeply 10 times. During this time, your mind will have time to adapt to the surrounding reality and calm down.
  7. Sometimes it's good to talk to yourself. In this way, your experiences will become more understandable to you. You are aware of the depth of the situation in which you find yourself. Understanding your condition will help you calm down, your heart will no longer beat so often.
  8. Feeling angry will help you switch off your fear, so find someone who makes you feel that way.
  9. Find something really funny, it will neutralize panic attacks instantly. You will feel much better after this.



Stop being afraid of your fears

In fact, the feeling of fear helps us overcome life's obstacles and improve our lives. Many people have done great things out of fear. Great musicians were afraid that they would remain unrecognized and composed great music, athletes were afraid of defeat and reached incredible heights, scientists and doctors made discoveries, being afraid of something.

This feeling actually mobilizes the forces of our body, makes us act actively and do great things.


You can never overcome your fear by simply letting it go indiscriminately or not paying attention to it. But you can become happier. Try to live with joy, enjoying the current moment. Do not worry too much about past mistakes and constantly dream about the future. This will help you live comfortably and enjoy what you have.

Do what you love and you will feel that you matter to other people. This will help you deal with all the fears and anxieties in your life more easily.

One person was invited to speak at a banquet. He was in a panic, because he would have to speak in front of a crowd of thousands. But man overcame his fear by a combination of mental preparation and self-hypnosis. For several nights he sat in a chair for five minutes and said to himself slowly, quietly and positively: "I am going to conquer this fear. I am now overcoming it. I speak with confidence. I am relaxed and at peace."

After a short self-talk, the person began to notice how confident he felt about public speaking. Using hypnosis, self-hypnosis and self-talk, the man conquered his cowardice and eradicated it from his mind. In this article, we will tell you how to remove fear from the subconscious.

Why does this technique work?

The mind is always open to suggestions and can control them. When you calm your mind and relax, thoughts begin to sink deep into the subconscious. While your mind is receptive to ideas, a home self-hypnosis session can have a powerful effect on your thought patterns and beliefs.

Thus, a person sows positive seeds (thoughts) into the subconscious, where they grow and multiply. As a result, a person becomes balanced, serene, calm and self-confident.

Man's greatest enemy is fear

It is said that fear is the greatest enemy of mankind. Fear of failure, illness, bad human relationships. Millions of people fear the past, the future, old age, insanity, death.

Fear is just a thought that arises in your mind. So really, when you are afraid, you are afraid of your own thoughts. So how to remove the feeling of anxiety and fear? How to start living differently?

All worries and worries are only in your head.

A little boy can be paralyzed with fear when told that the monster under the bed will take him away. But when the father turns on the light and shows the son that there is no one in the room, the child is freed from this obsessive thought and, accordingly, from fear. The fear in the boy's mind was as real as if there really was a monster living there. However, his father freed his mind from false thought. What the child feared did not exist. Likewise, most of your fears have no basis in reality. They are simply a collection of sinister, swollen shadows that have no physical form or proof.

We will tell you how to remove fear, but you will have to try hard for this - learn to control your thoughts and fear. But only in this way it will be possible to cope with this feeling, however, as well as with anxiety and anxiety. Let's find out what are the most popular and common fears that a person can have that you can deal with on your own:


Fear of public speaking, stage

Let's find out how to remove the fear of the public. To do this, we will introduce you to an entertaining story.

The young lady was invited to audition. She was looking forward to the interview. However, on three previous occasions she had failed due to stage fright. The girl had an incredibly beautiful voice, but she was sure that when it was her turn to speak in front of the jury, she would absorb fear and she would not cope.

The subconscious accepted this challenge and did as she asked. In the previous three auditions, the girl sang the wrong notes, and eventually she broke down and started crying. What the young lady thought about before each performance was involuntary autosuggestion.

But the girl was able to overcome her stage fright. Three times a day, she isolated herself in a room, sat comfortably in a chair, relaxed her body, and closed her eyes. The girl calmed her mind to the best of her ability. She neutralized the suggestion of fear by talking to herself: "I sing beautifully. I am balanced, serene, confident and calm." Immediately after that, her stage fright began to gradually decrease.

Fear of failure

If you want to learn how to remove fears from your head, then be prepared for a long work on yourself. It doesn't matter where these fearful thoughts come from - from childhood, from upbringing or from the environment, but now that you have realized your weaknesses, it's time to eradicate them. Let's learn how to remove the fear of failure using the example of students.

Many students face a problem during exams. When it's their turn to tell the ticket, most of students simply forget all the information received during their studies. But immediately after the exams, they remember the answers and regret that they could not tell their teacher.

The thing is that such students unconsciously project their failure because they are not confident in their abilities. They wait in advance when they make a mistake, and after that they simply shrug their shoulders, saying: "I knew that it would be so. I am not worthy of good grades."

Every night and morning, imagine that the closest person congratulates you on receiving a diploma. Hold an imaginary paper in your hands, thank those around you for their support. Start contemplating happiness - it will have a good effect on you. Then you will go to each session with the thought that a diploma, a good career, and academic success are worthy of your person.

Normal and abnormal fear

Man is born with only two fears: fear of falling and noise. It is connected with natural intuition as a means of self-preservation. Normal fear is quite natural. You hear a car driving down the road and you step back so it doesn't hit you - that's survival. All other fears are transmitted from parents, relatives, teachers, and all those who somehow influenced you in early age.

abnormal fear

Abnormal fear occurs when a person launches it into the imagination, and he, in turn, creates real chaos. For example, one woman was invited to travel the world by plane. She began to cut out all reports of disasters from the newspaper, imagining herself falling into the ocean, breaking on the ground. This is not a normal fear. The woman insisted that the accident must happen.

Another example of abnormal fear. One prosperous businessman, successful and promising, often projected a mental movie in his head where he becomes bankrupt and poor. This continued until the person sank into a deep depression. The businessman's fear was accompanied by such phrases as "Our wealth cannot last long", "I am sure that we will go bankrupt". In the end, this man's business began to fade away, and he slowly but surely walked towards the fact that all his fears began to come true.

Fear of poverty

Many are wondering how to remove the fear of poverty. This fear is very common these days. People see massive unemployment financial loss during housing crises, economic slowdown. But don't let your worst fears create the very reality you hope to avoid.

Fear of poverty can become an obsession and affect many aspects of your life, including your relationships with family members and friends. So how to remove anxiety and fear from the subconscious? Redirect your thoughts towards prosperity, conduct a self-hypnosis session to overcome the fear of poverty. Such fear sometimes does not overwhelm people because they are stupid or ignorant. But you know what's going on in the world. You are aware of the economic situation.

There are people who are afraid that something terrible will happen to their children or befall them. terrible disaster. When they read about an epidemic or a rare disease, they live in fear of catching that virus. And some even imagine that they are already suffering from this deadly disease. All this is an abnormal fear.

A few steps to get on the free path

We have put together a few useful tips that will tell you how to remove fear from the subconscious:


How to remove fear from a child?

A little boy was walking with his mother through the park. They chatted amicably, the woman explained to the child what kind of trees grow in this place. Suddenly a dog ran out from behind a bush. The woman, instead of acting rationally, calmly and courageously, began to scream loudly. The child picked up the fear and condition of the mother, after which he began to cry. It doesn't matter if the dog wanted to bite the boy or just got loose.

The woman had to have an educational conversation with her son and explain that this was a one-time incident, that not all animals are aggressive and evil, but it is important to be careful with them - do not torture them, do not tease them, educate them correctly, do not beat them. Instead, she instilled in the child a new phobia, saying that you should never approach dogs and every creature can bite, or even kill.

Finally

Now you know how to remove anxiety and fear from your mind. Remember that nothing can disturb you except your own thoughts. Offers, statements or threats of other people are not valid. The power is within you, and when your thoughts are focused on the fact that everything will be fine, then the Universe gives you goodness and well-being.

Anxiety and fear... The eternal companions of man, from the cradle to the grave. Surely you still remember how, as a child, you were afraid of the dark far room to shiver, how you thought that terrible monsters live there and are waiting for the right moment to grab you and eat you ... You grew up, and children chilling soul fears were replaced by others - adults, "serious". What are you afraid of now? Perform in front of an audience? Stay alone? Or maybe get sick and die young?

It's okay to be afraid!

Fear is a natural feeling of a person, it has long helped him survive in sometimes difficult conditions. environment. This is our bodyguard. And there is nothing wrong with him, unless he "guards" us too hard. If it does not haunt us constantly and does not interfere with a normal life.

It is common for a person to be afraid of many things: darkness, heights, water, dogs, insects, mice, poverty, diseases, open space, closed space, etc. But are anxiety and fear always justified? Fortunately, no. There are not so many dangers in life. Most human fears have no objective reason. These are imaginary fears. And they have no place in the life of a sane person.

The worst fear

But how to get rid of the fear of death, for example? You are so accustomed to this feeling that it seems impossible not to be afraid to die! Everyone is afraid of this! And somehow they live with it ... Somehow. Tense. Not sure. Painfully.

But let's deal with the fear of death. Why fear what cannot be avoided? Each creature on the planet will die sooner or later. A priori. So is it worth overshadowing your existence with useless anxiety? Is it worth it to turn it into a living hell, torturing yourself with an unfulfilled desire to live forever? Wouldn't it be more pleasant to accept with gratitude the opportunity to stay on Earth for a while? And enjoy every moment?

How to get rid of the fear of death? Paradoxically, the easiest way is to accept it, put up with it and don't try to get rid of it! The more we fight with fear, the more strength and energy we lose. Accept your inevitable fate. Humble yourself. You will die anyway, whether you like it or not. It's pointless to be afraid. Try to explain this simple idea to your mind in an accessible way. He will understand.

We declare war on phobias

With the fear of death, everything is more or less clear. This is familiar to everyone. But there are such fears of people that many are not aware of. But what about you - the one who lives with it? For those who are afraid to admit it even to the closest person ... How to get rid of fears and anxiety before the upcoming trip? Before public speaking? What to do if you are afraid to drive public transport, because there are so many all sorts of pathogenic microbes? In the end, how to get rid of the fear of being eaten horrible monsters living in a dark distant room that has tormented you so much since childhood?

Take a pen and a sheet of paper. To get rid of fears, make a list of everything that you are afraid of. Don't lie, write everything. Admit to yourself all your fears. Analyze each one carefully. Why are you afraid of this? Is it worth it? Is there an objective reason for this or that concern? This way you can separate real fears from imagined ones. Leave the real ones, perhaps they will someday save you from trouble. And with the imaginary will have to work.

If you are overwhelmed by some kind of mental fear, remember that you are a person, and you are worthy of joy and happiness. Think about what gives you pleasure - and fear will go away by itself. One situation or another may or may not occur. Your fear may be empty and meaningless! Why do you need him? Leave it and be open to any manifestations of life. In any case, this is your experience, and it should be different.

It will also help in a state of panic and anxiety. deep breathing. Consciousness will calm down - and common sense come back and help fix the problem.

How to get rid of fear if it does not give in? Go for the trick! Try to get angry at yourself, at circumstances, at someone - it doesn't matter. Anger neutralizes fear, and in return comes the determination to act and change things.

Through fear to new heights

Remember: when a person overcomes his fears, he grows and develops. His horizons become wider, the boundaries of the personality expand, new opportunities appear, the world takes on new colors. Therefore, do not give in to your fears, accept them as a gift of fate, as an opportunity to become better.

Look into the eyes of what you are afraid of - and become a new person!

Fear is one of the innate emotions that every person has from time to time. Performs positive function, being an alarm signal and helping to survive in case of a threat. Fear mobilizes our body, preparing it for flight. But in some cases, fear manifests itself in an unhealthy, neurotic form (phobias, panic, generalized anxiety, obsessive-compulsive disorder) and significantly spoils a person's life.

Fear is classified as a negative emotion. It is very painful to experience states of severe anxiety, so people, as a rule, look for any ways that allow them to quickly.

Chemical addictions

As a result, they commit a lot of erroneous actions that, instead of alleviating the problem, on the contrary, exacerbate it. Such actions include alcohol consumption, uncontrolled intake of sedatives, jamming of emotions with sweets, smoking.

Of course, all these options for getting rid of the feeling of fear are a road to nowhere. They allow you to emotionally disconnect only for a short time. Therefore, a person regularly returns to the tried and tested way to feel relief. As a result, ever larger doses of "anesthetic" are required. This is how they are formed bad habits and dependencies.

Non-chemical dependencies

To more sophisticated and hidden ways to escape from negative experiences is immersion in some kind of activity that fills everything. free time person. A person strives to constantly be in the company of other people, plunges headlong into work, computer games. As soon as he is left alone and cut off from his usual business for a while, an inexplicable feeling of anxiety arises. The neurotic, without understanding why, turns on the phone, starts flipping through the news feed or calling friends - just to be distracted and not to encounter the contents of the subconscious, ready to emerge out in forced silence.

Another way to cope with psychological stress is compulsions. This is a mindless obsessive repetition of the same actions, often of a ritual nature and supposedly preventing frightening events. For example, counting, knocking on wood, snapping fingers. Compulsive behavior helps to partially turn off consciousness and, in turn, phobias make you change your entire lifestyle so as not to encounter frightening objects and circumstances. But for such tactics, as a result, one has to pay with a significant decrease in the quality of life and degradation of the individual.

How to get rid of fear in a healthy way

Do not blame yourself for bad habits that have developed as a result of trying to get rid of bouts of fear. On the certain stage development, it was the only way known and available to you how to overcome fear. But if you want to grow as a person and be truly happy man, you need to look for other methods of how to get rid of fear.

People often wonder how to kill fear in themselves, not realizing that any, even the strongest negative emotion- this is their friend and assistant, signaling some kind of problem. It's just that in the case of so-called irrational fears, the danger does not come from external environment, and from inner world person.

The source of fear in this situation is an erroneous perception of reality, obsessive negative thoughts and beliefs that interfere with normal life. Sometimes people are their own worst enemy. By assimilating and maintaining negative mental attitudes in his mind, he inevitably drives himself into a network of stress. The problem is that destructive thoughts that generate anxiety are perceived by a person as an objective reality, and not as errors of perception.

Paradoxically, human thinking is for the most part an unconscious and thoughtless process. develops when a person ceases to control the imagination and the course of his thoughts. If you want to get rid of fears and phobias, you need to learn to think differently than you do now. When dysfunctional and repetitive types of fear responses can be changed to healthier ones, anxiety disorders disappear.

The role of cognitive distortions in the development of fear

Cognitive distortions (mistakes in thinking inherent in each of us) give rise to many baseless fears. For example, two people hit the same life situation- They need to propose to their girls. Of course, there is a possibility of rejection. But how such a scenario of events is perceived differently depending on the type of human thinking.

An optimist will see rejection as an invitation to work on themselves. Find out the reasons why the girl said no. Will try to change in order to achieve a positive answer, or decide that it is worth finding another person as a life partner. A pessimist perceives a probable rejection as a life catastrophe, a confirmation of his unworthiness. If he is sure that he will not be able to love anyone else, pictures of forced loneliness will loom in his mind. If, in addition to the above, a person is convinced that “loneliness is terrible,” then imagine the level of panic that will seize him at a crucial moment. Will he even dare to propose and, perhaps, find out the “terrible” truth?

How to Get Rid of Anxiety and Fear with Thought Control

Such absurd and evil thoughts about various things visit every person from time to time. Every thought, in turn, evokes an emotion. It is important to understand that those thoughts that cause intense fear are based on deep and unconscious erroneous attitudes. They cannot be taken into account when assessing the situation.

For example, a thought-fear: my partner will definitely leave me. Variants of erroneous beliefs, as a result of which fear arose:

  • people cannot be trusted;
  • to be thrown humiliatingly;
  • I am not worthy of love.

Thought-fear: if I go to work, my husband will be angry with me. Variants of erroneous beliefs, as a result of which fear arose:

  • I must devote all my time to my husband;
  • if someone is angry with me, then it's my fault.

Remember that you yourself empower certain thoughts that scare you as a result. There is a huge gulf between a randomly flashed unpleasant thought “I will be left alone” and a firm, but nevertheless unfounded belief in this. You yourself take a step towards fear by giving your attention to negative thoughts. The mind is designed to seek confirmation of any thought you focus on. That is why it is so important to look at things from a positive point of view. After all, by cultivating confidence in future success in any scenario in the present, you inevitably rise up the emotional scale - to hope, enthusiasm and anticipation.

How to overcome your fear with positive thinking

Positive thinking is not burying your head in the sand, but the systematization of thoughts. Most people are very scrupulous about the quantity and quality of food they consume, understanding the importance of a healthy diet for their body. But with regard to thoughts, the same selectivity is absent.

Be careful with funds mass media. Stop mindlessly browsing social networks and news. Most messages are structured in such a way as to grab people's attention. And the easiest way to do this is by broadcasting frightening information and savoring the details of various catastrophes and natural disasters.

Every minute there are many wonderful events in the world - healthy children are born, people find new friends, fall in love, recover, safely drive to work in their car without any incidents. But that doesn't make good news. And as a result, the world is portrayed through the media as threatening and dangerous.

Refuse to watch news that does not lead to joy, but, on the contrary, increase the level of anxiety. Saturate your brain with only pleasant food for thought. Shift your attention to watching comedies and entertainment shows, reading life-affirming novels, and hanging out with upbeat people.

Only you can determine whether a particular thought is positive or limiting for you personally. If a thought brings you pleasant emotions, then it suits you and should be included in your belief system.

For example, you want to change your profession, but you are afraid of the inevitable changes. Thoughts that may come to your mind:

  • doing what you love (negative thought);
  • but there are people who somehow succeed (positive thought);
  • the chances of succeeding are too small - I will waste time and effort (negative thought);
  • it is better to fail than not to try at all (positive thought).
  • all lucky people are selfish (negative thought);
  • people will envy me (negative thought);
  • my friend will definitely support me (positive thought);
  • if I succeed, I can help others (positive thought);
  • people do not have money to pay for my services (negative thought);
  • I want too much from life (negative thought);
  • no one will get better if I give up on my dream (positive thought).

How to remove fear through meditation

Meditation is a useful skill that allows you to disconnect from negative impact external environment, to cope with an attack of anxiety or obsessive thoughts. Just 15 minutes of practice a day can provide mental relaxation and significantly reduce stress levels.

There is nothing difficult in meditation. You just need to retire, sit back, close your eyes and start concentrating on inhaling and exhaling. At first, you will notice how the mind is bombarded with various thoughts. You can't afford to be carried away. But at the same time, do not try to suppress thoughts. Treat the thoughts that arise as passing clouds. Notice the appearance of another thought impartially and return to the breath.

When you learn to separate yourself from thoughts and the emotions that give rise to them, becoming an outside observer, you will gain control over your emotional state. The position of a dispassionate observer helps to rise above emotions and choose more life-affirming thoughts for reflection. Even when hitting stressful situations(dismissal, divorce, death loved one), the 15-minute helps you find positive thoughts and develop a healthy response to the event.

How to Remove Fear with Visualization

There is one more effective method how to conquer fear. Try to work with your imagination. Every day before going to bed, draw in your mind pictures of how you successfully cope with a situation that scares you.

Let's say you have, and the thought of leaving the house, even to the nearest store, scares you to death. Your task is to go to shopping center only in your imagination. Imagine how one fine day, when the weather is good outside, you get dressed and leave the entrance. The sun is shining, friendly people are around, and you yourself are in good mood. Enjoying the walk, you reach the end of the block and enter the store. Slowly and with pleasure make purchases, and then successfully return home. Gradually, a positive image will be fixed in the subconscious, and the fear of going out into the street will pass.

How to overcome your fear in an emergency

In a state of panic, a person is in an extremely excited state. emotional state and hardly understands what is happening around. If you have the idea of ​​how to overcome fear and stop the tantrum, then you are able to take control of your condition. Try the following steps:

  1. Inhale through your nose for 4 counts, hold your breath for 1-2 seconds, exhale through your nose for 4 counts, hold your breath for 1-2 seconds, and so on.
  2. Soothing Movements: Lean forward, completely relaxing your head, neck, shoulders and arms, hanging them freely down. Breathe slowly and deeply, and then rise slowly. If you feel that you can’t calm the fear and still feel trembling in your body, try moving around: walk, swing your arms. This will help neutralize the release of the stress hormone adrenaline into the blood.
  3. Washing with cold water will help to recover and put in order disturbing thoughts.
  4. Start taking action. Focus on the needs of others rather than your own worries and anxious thoughts. Nothing so mobilizes internal resources like love and a sense of responsibility for one's neighbor.

Preparing for the worst case scenario

Another way to overcome fear is to get used to the worst case scenario. Sometimes it seems to us that some things are simply unbearable. But on the test, our psyche is much stronger. For example, you have a fear that you will be fired from your job.

Cross the line in your mind that you are afraid to cross. Consider this scenario. What will you do after the event happens? Have to look for a new place, and there is no guarantee that you will find it quickly? Do you have to save hard? Will you become financially dependent on your spouse, will you get into debt? Imagine all the possible options that scare you, and think about what actions you will take if you fail. Having done this exercise in your thoughts, you will find that instead of fear, you feel an energy upsurge and a desire to act.

How to overcome fear by transferring experiences to the future:

How to remove fear from the subconscious

To overcome fear, you need to work with its root cause. Many of our fears seem unfounded and irrational. This happens when the psyche defends itself in order to minimize the power of negative experiences. Often, in order to justify the emotion, the unconscious comes up with a false explanation for the existing fear.

For example, a man is afraid of dogs. At a meeting with a hypnologist, it turns out that a deeply repressed sense of one's own inferiority caused the development of a phobia. The feeling of being a victim, the lack of healthy aggression and the inability to defend one's interests in relationships were transformed into a fear of animals. The logic of the unconscious is as follows: it is better to be afraid of dogs than to admit your failure.

Identify the object of fear and try to understand what it can be symbolically associated with. It is important not to deny emotions, not to drive them far into a corner, but simply to deal with the source of their occurrence. For example, acrophobes are afraid not so much of heights as of uncertainty, claustrophobes - not so much of closed spaces as of restrictions in actions. Of course, such introspection is quite challenging task. If none of the above methods of how to get rid of phobias and fears on your own helped you, it is better to turn to

Fear is a natural and necessary emotion for life, or rather an affective state. Healthy fear ensures self-preservation. This is a sign of intelligence and fantasy, the desire to live. Justified fear, such as the fear of a fire due to an electrical appliance left on, is helpful. Like pain, it warns us of a possible or emerging problem. But what if the fear is out of control and interferes with life? Read on.

Like any phenomenon, fear can be viewed from two sides, positive and negative:

  • The negative power of fear is that, being uncontrollable or turning into anxiety, behavioral disorders and the like, it spoils the life of an individual.
  • The positive power of fear is that it provides development. From the fear of ignorance, schools appeared, from the fear of death and injury in road accidents, mechanics improve cars, the fear of poisoning makes us carefully process and store products.

The difference between fear and anxiety

Fear is an emotion that is closely related to another one - anxiety. Sometimes these definitions can be confused. However, there are 3 characteristics that distinguish between these concepts:

  1. Fear is more specific, for example, there is a fear of heights. While anxiety does not have a clear outline.
  2. Anxiety is a subjectively significant emotion. It is caused by things, values ​​that are significant for a particular individual. Anxiety arises against the background of a threat to the personality itself, its essence, worldview.
  3. Before anxiety, a person is often helpless. For example, if uncertainty causes anxiety during an earthquake, then a person cannot influence this.
  4. Anxiety is a constant phenomenon, fear is caused by a specific situation.

Specificity of fear

We can distinguish between real and false fear:

  • The first we experience in critical situations. For example, when a car hit snow drift and it's about to turn around.
  • False fear - imaginary feelings about what did not happen (“What if I get into a skid?”). We need to fight against false fears.

When we experience fear, there is an increase in sensory attention and motor tension. That is, we observe more actively and are ready to quickly run (act).

Uncontrolled and unprocessed fears turn into phobias and anxieties, which provokes personality neuroticism.

Signs of fear

Signs of fear include:

  • anxiety;
  • anxiety;
  • jealousy;
  • shyness;
  • other subjective states;
  • uncertainty;
  • physiological changes;
  • avoidance of the object of discomfort.

Reasons for fear

Among the reasons are:

  • self-doubt and other disorders;
  • childhood psychological trauma;
  • constant stress and often recurring critical situations;
  • the instinct of self-preservation.

The last reason encourages normative fear.

As noted by V. A. Kostina and O. V. Doronina, fear can be hereditary. Moreover, women are more likely to have social fears, and men - the fear of heights. By inheritance, the fear of heights, darkness, fear of doctors, punishment, loss of loved ones is transmitted.

How dangerous is fear

With fear, a number of physiological changes occur in the body. The work includes the hypothalamus, pituitary gland and adrenal cortex. As a result of activation of the hypothalamus, corticotropin is produced. It in turn includes the nervous system and the pituitary gland. It triggers the adrenal glands and produces prolactin. The adrenal glands secrete cortisol. Along with this, adrenaline and norepinephrine are produced. Externally and internally, all this is manifested:

  • pressure increase;
  • increased heart rate and respiration;
  • opening of the bronchi;
  • "goose skin";
  • decreased blood flow to the organs of the digestive and reproductive systems;
  • pupil dilation;
  • the release of glucose into the blood;
  • fast burning of fats;
  • increased acidity in the stomach and decreased production of enzymes;
  • shutdown of the immune system.

That is, the body comes into tension and becomes at a low start.

In real danger, this allows you to think faster, see better, hit harder, run faster. But if the fear is imaginary and constant, then the body does not benefit from everything that happens to it at this moment. That is why, against the background of fear, psychosomatic diseases develop:

  • stool disorders,
  • bronchial edema,
  • dyspnea,
  • chest pain.

Thus, there is a vicious circle. For example, you are afraid of getting sick, but against the background of fear you get sick. In addition, the more often you experience fear (stress), the less you can rationally assess the situation, which results in chronic phobias.

Just don't say that now you have a fear of fear (that was not my goal). In any case, we'll deal with it now. Read on.

The most popular fears: description and solution

One of the most popular fears is the fear of death (of one's own or loved ones). This is the most controversial phenomenon:

  • On the one hand, it can reach such proportions that a person will close within four walls and simply rewind the allotted time.
  • But on the other hand, this is a normal fear that makes us look around when we cross the road.

The only way to deal with it is to accept it. All people are mortal. It makes no sense to experience death several times in your thoughts and darken yourself with this all your life.

Other popular fears include fear of others, of oneself, of time, of fear.

Fear of others

The basis of fear is criticism, moreover, yours in the first place. To overcome this problem, try not to criticize yourself, but to praise. It is human nature to project our shortcomings or problems onto others, that is, in people we notice and scold what we do not accept in ourselves. And, as it were, we play ahead of the curve until it is noticed here. That is, we are afraid that our shortcomings will be noticed. This also includes:

  • pickiness;
  • resentment;
  • revenge;
  • unpleasant character traits (conflict, deceit, dishonesty, avoiding problems, indecision).

If you notice this in people and are afraid to experience it for yourself, then you probably already experienced it in your face a long time ago. On the same basis, there is a fear of seeming ridiculous, falling under the evil mood of someone. Solution to the problem: show yourself what you want to see in others.

Fear of self

We are talking about the fear of one's own ailments, imperfections of the body, loss of strength and the like. For such a problem, the solution is to achieve harmony of the body, brain and soul. This is a very difficult and wide path. Simply put, this is getting rid of psychosomatics.

Learn to listen to your body and accept the fact that it is a system capable of self-regulation, if it is not interfered with by imaginary fears. Have you ever said: “I don’t understand how I could do this. Now I won’t repeat it on purpose”? Here is the answer.

Fear of time

Learn the principle of "here and now." Fear of the passing time is often accompanied by self-flagellation due to postponing something for later or to the will of fate. You need to learn how to act and take responsibility for your actions.

  • Get rid of laziness.
  • Embrace the principle of "everything has its time," but in the context of your fulfilling your life plan and creating favorable conditions, and not waiting for the intervention of external forces.
  • Scroll through the situations in your head before doing something in practice (of course, only with a happy outcome).

Fear of fear

First of all, learn to call a spade a spade. Not "I'm nervous", but "I'm afraid of something". Mostly we are talking about the fear of the unknown. Read about overcoming it in the paragraph “From fear to freedom” of this article.

  1. Learn to overcome your fears and use them for good. There is no need to be ashamed of fear, but you need to overcome it and resist. The optimal method in this case is the “wedge by wedge”. It's important to face your fears. If in alcoholism treatment begins with the acceptance (voicing, recognition) of the problem, then the correction of fears begins with a confrontation.
  2. When working with fears, it is important to understand that it will not work the first time. You must be aware that it will not be easy, but it will be worth it. In case of failure, prepare an alternative plan (people with fears are best at coming up with workarounds), but use it only as a plan B.
  3. Pretend you're not afraid of anything. Imagine that you have to play a role on stage. After a while, your brain will believe that you really are not afraid of anything.
  4. Fears about the future are the least justified. You create your own future, so pay attention to the present. Fears about him are much more justified. By torturing yourself with something from the future, you spoil your whole life. You exist, you don't live.
  5. Accept the fact that our life consists of white and black stripes, sometimes gray. Troubles, difficulties and uncertainties will often appear. It is important not to be afraid to face it, but to be sure that you can handle it. To do this, you need to be the master of your life.
  6. Most fears come from childhood. But, firstly, a child and an adult perceive the same things in different ways. Secondly, often fear or disagreements with a particular person are projected onto an object. For example, you have problems in your relationship with your parents, but you are afraid of the dark (you were once locked in a closet). Then there is only one solution - to let go or discuss grievances.
  7. Have you noticed that fears are always directed to the future (even if they are based on the experience of the past), and fears develop through imagination? So why not redirect your forces, for example, to creativity? Learn to switch attention. Understand that working through future events that most likely will not happen, you spend real physical, intellectual and psychological strength. Don't you feel sorry for this?
  8. Fear of the unknown is the most unjustified. You do not yet know the object (phenomenon) itself, so how do you know that you need to be afraid of it? Try it. Haven't been on a plane? Try it. And then decide whether you will be afraid or not.

I want to make a reservation that you can not rush into the pool with your head and neglect your safety. That is, to live full life having no fears does not mean going snowboarding, getting hurt and being disabled. Living without fear means making decisions yourself and being responsible for them, understanding all the risks and possible consequences.

The body is able to heal itself. Your task is to bring him out of a state of eternal tension. And that's what relaxation is for. We are talking about conscious relaxation of the body, replacement negative emotions positive. But once again I remind you that you need to get rid of only unhealthy fear.

Plan of Healing

To overcome fear, you need to consistently solve a number of problems.

  1. Change faith in the bad (this is fear) to faith in the good. There is a recipe for everyone here: someone turns to nature, someone to spirits, God, their own old pleasant memories.
  2. Next, find support in someone and give it yourself.
  3. Learn to listen to your body and trust your intuition.
  4. Find the root cause of false fear.
  5. Make up your recipe for courage. These are detailed aspirations (desires) and ways to achieve them. It is important to describe not only what needs to be done, but also what you can do.
  6. Refocus attention from the result to the process.

You can read about each of these points and how to do them in L. Rankin's book Healing from Fear. Given in the work practical advice on meditation, the search for inner strength, the development of courage. For each element (beliefs, courage, search for causes, etc.), a whole list of techniques with a description is presented. The author presented so many techniques in one edition that I think you will definitely find something for yourself there.

From fear to freedom

If you are still reading this article, then you are probably trapped in your own fears and are looking for a way to freedom. Right? Well, he is. Includes 5 items:

  1. Exit from the unconscious. It takes more energy to avoid the risk than the risk itself. A person is driven by the thought “better reliability than regrets.” In order to step over this stage, ask yourself the question: is your comfort zone really the same for you? Imagine who you could be if it wasn't for your fears.
  2. Getting out of your perceived comfort zone. At this stage, a person is driven by the belief that uncertainty is the only constant and clear in his life. That is, a person understands that he infringes on himself, but remains in the old place. At this stage, it is important to stimulate yourself with praise. You are a brave person and will be able to get out of your zone.
  3. At the third stage, a person is not afraid of uncertainty, but does not look for it either. Doubt more, be curious.
  4. The search for the uncertain, the unknown, the new. Learn to see possibilities.
  5. Acceptance of uncertainty as such (in the concept of the world). Realize that anything can happen, but any event has a meaning.

The fifth stage is the final one. This is the very freedom without fears that you need to enjoy. However, this is the most unstable stage. Your freedom must be constantly reinforced and maintained by practice. Otherwise it is easy to lose it.

Emergency help

  1. If fear caught you by surprise, then quickly find inner strength can be done with attention shifting. As you become aware of your fear, direct your attention to your most intense passion, desire. Focus on it. Want it so much that there is no room for fear. Even if the objects of passion and fear are from different "worlds". Convince yourself that you will quickly deal with what scares you, and then do what you want.
  2. The second way to quickly overcome fear is to imagine what it deprives you of. Usually people evaluate only one side: what fear saves them from. Imagine how much fear stifles your potential, your individuality, originality.
  3. Practice self-indulgence. Repeat daily in front of a mirror, “I am the master of my life. Everything that happens (both good and bad) depends on me. There is no place for fear, as well as meaning in it.
  4. If the fear is clearly defined, then thoroughly study all its aspects. Look him in the face. Find the positives.
  5. The most non-standard and categorical method of struggle is worry about the consequences of anxiety. This is a dubious way, but it exists. Imagine how the situation will worsen from your experiences (after reading this article, you know what your body experiences during a period of fear). Oddly enough, from the realization of "playing against yourself" you will calm down. But I must say right away that the method is not suitable for everyone. You can go into even more self-torture. Be careful!

Childhood fears

In spite of individual character fears (although, as we remember, they are not so subjective, unlike anxiety), they are based on the actual need of age. Therefore, we can generally classify fears by age:

  1. Up to six months - fear of sharp and loud sounds and movements, loss of support.
  2. From six months to a year - fear of dressing up, changing the usual, strangers, height.
  3. From a year to two - fear of doctors, injuries, separation from parents.
  4. From two to three years - fear of the dark, parental rejection, animals, loneliness, nightmares.
  5. From three to seven years - fear of insects, water, heights, fairy tale characters, misfortunes, catastrophes, fires, schools.
  6. School period - fear of harsh sounds, death, physical violence, loss of loved ones. Along with this, social fears arise that persist in the future (fear of being late, not coping with the task, getting punished). If you do not work out these fears, then there will be a fear of not living up to expectations, of looking stupid; relationship problems.

Age fears are normative if the child does not drop out of life (sociable, open). They will pass on their own. But if the child avoids communication, is constantly scared and worried, then professional correction is needed.

Children's fears can be imitative or personal. In the first case - copying someone's behavior, in the second - their emotions under the influence of difficult situations.

In addition, fears can be short-term (up to 20 minutes), quickly passing (leave after a conversation), protracted (up to 2 months, even with corrective work).

Children's fears: what to do?

You can fight children's fears with the help of fairy tale therapy. As part of this, I recommend that you familiarize yourself with the book by R. M. Tkach “Fairytale Therapy of Children's Problems”. In the work one can find not only a description of the method, but also the material (plots) of the fairy tales themselves.

  1. Do not shame the child for fears, but ask about them. For example, what he saw, and how it looked, what it came for.
  2. Accept the child's fear and tell a real or fictional story of personal fear and overcoming it.
  3. Do not close the child in a dark room for the sake of punishment, do not scare the child with Baba Yaga or the "evil uncle" who will take him away. This is a direct path to neuroses and fears.
  4. Ask what the child is watching or reading. Discuss it together.
  5. To overcome specific fears, use fairy tale therapy or ridicule of fears.

Ridicule involves the visualization of fear (on a piece of paper) with the subsequent addition of funny (for a child) elements to it.

I also recommend the book by S. V. Bedredinova and A. I. Tascheva “Prevention and correction of fears: tutorial". It presents many practical options for therapy with children to overcome fears. Listing methods here, I think, does not make sense. The manual describes puppet therapy, and art therapy, and a correction program, and much more (with indications and contraindications for each method, features of the implementation). The phenomenon of children's fears themselves is also described.

Results and literature on the topic

Fear is the echo of the animal in man, the primitive. Previously, this emotion was justified even when it was constant. But in modern world it prevents a person from living. The situation is even more aggravated if fear is intertwined with anxiety, shame, guilt and other emotions.

The danger of fear is not contrived. It not only creates psychological discomfort, but also destroys the body on a physical level. In part, the phrase “Whoever is afraid of something will happen to him” is true. And this is not about the supreme forces, the attraction of misfortunes and ailments. The point is that, experiencing fear, our body radically changes its work: there is an excess of hormones (with prolonged excessive influence, they provoke imbalance and intoxication, destruction of organs), the digestive and reproductive systems fade into the background, activity of cardio-vascular system gaining momentum. A person can actually get sick.

It is necessary to get rid of fear (I remind you, false fear). But only children's fears can go away on their own. Adults will have to consciously break themselves, rebuild their belief systems, challenge themselves constantly, make a plan of action.

I recommend reading another book: D. T. Mangan " The secret of the easy life: How to live without problems. The author reveals his own concept, according to which we are a complex mechanism that requires flogs to enable or disable systems. The book is a practical guide to restructuring your thinking, including getting rid of fears. For each problem, Mangan suggests using a unique password. These are the words to be spoken in difficult situations. And from them, supposedly, the situation will turn in your favor. I myself have not tried this approach, so I can’t say anything good or bad. But in my opinion, the very idea of ​​the concept is interesting.

In the fight against fears, as in any business, the main thing is the beginning! You yourself will not notice how the fight will become easier. Gradually it will no longer be a struggle. Well, the result is in the form of complete mental freedom - highest award. I wish you success in the fight against inner demons!

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