How to write a note for communion about sins. What is needed for confession. How to correctly name sins in confession: what to do if you are ashamed

18.04.2024

Isn't it time for us all to learn how to confess correctly? – the employees of the “Orthodox Life” portal decisively and without hesitation asked the confessor of the Kyiv theological schools, KDA teacher Archimandrite Markell (Pavuk).

Photo: Boris Gurevich fotokto.ru

– A large number of people do not know what to repent of. Many go to confession and remain silent, waiting for leading questions from the priests. Why does this happen and what does an Orthodox Christian need to repent of?

– Usually people don’t know what to repent of for several reasons:

1. They lead a distracted life (busy with thousands of things), and they have no time to take care of themselves, look into their souls and see what is wrong there. Nowadays there are 90% of such people, if not more.

2. Many suffer from high self-esteem, that is, they are proud, and therefore are more inclined to notice and condemn other people’s sins and shortcomings than their own.

3. Neither their parents, nor teachers, nor priests taught them what and how to repent.

And an Orthodox Christian should repent, first of all, of what his conscience denounces him of. It is best to build a confession according to the Ten Commandments of God. That is, during Confession, we must first talk about what we have sinned against God (these could be sins of unbelief, lack of faith, superstition, deity, oaths), then repent of sins against our neighbors (disrespect, inattention to parents, disobedience to them, deception, cunning, condemnation, anger against neighbors, hostility, arrogance, pride, vanity, stinginess, theft, seducing others into sin, fornication, etc.). I advise you to read the book “To Help the Penitent,” compiled by St. Ignatius (Brianchaninov). The work of Elder John Krestyankin presents a sample of confession according to the Ten Commandments of God. Based on these works, you can compose your own informal confession.

– How detailed should you talk about your sins during confession?

– It all depends on the degree of your repentance for your sins. If a person has determined in his heart not to return to this or that sin again, then he tries to uproot it and therefore describes everything to the smallest detail. And if a person repents formally, then he gets something like: “I sinned in deed, in word, in thought.” The exception to this rule is the sins of fornication. In this case, there is no need to describe the details. If the priest feels that a person is indifferent even to such sins, then he can ask additional questions in order to shame such a person at least a little and motivate him to true repentance.

– If you don’t feel at ease after confession, what does that mean?

– This may indicate that there was no genuine repentance, confession was made without heartfelt contrition, but only a formal listing of sins with an unwillingness to change one’s life and not sin again. True, sometimes the Lord does not immediately give a feeling of lightness, so that a person does not become proud and immediately fall into the same sins again. Ease also does not immediately come if a person confesses old, deeply rooted sins. For ease to come, you need to shed a lot of tears of repentance.

– If you went to confession at Vespers, and after the service you managed to sin, do you need to go to confession again in the morning?

– If these are prodigal sins, anger or drunkenness, then you definitely need to repent of them again and even ask the priest for penance, so as not to commit previous sins so quickly. If sins of another kind have been committed (condemnation, laziness, verbosity), then during the evening or morning prayer rule one should sincerely ask forgiveness from the Lord for the sins committed, and confess them at the next confession.

– If during confession you forgot to mention some sin, and then after a while you remembered it, do you need to go to the priest again and talk about it?

– If there is such an opportunity and the priest is not very busy, then he will even rejoice for your diligence, but if there is no such opportunity, then you need to write down this sin so as not to forget it again, and repent of it during the next confession.

– How to learn to see your sins?

– A person begins to see his sins when he stops judging other people. In addition, seeing one’s weakness, as St. Simeon the New Theologian writes, teaches one to carefully fulfill God’s commandments. As long as a person does one thing and neglects the other, he will not be able to feel what a wound his sins inflict on his soul.

– What to do with the feeling of shame during confession, with the desire to obscure and hide your sin? Will this hidden sin be forgiven by God?

– Shame in confession is a natural feeling, which indicates that a person’s conscience is alive. It's worse when there is no shame. But the main thing is that shame does not reduce our confession to formality, when we confess one thing and hide another. It is unlikely that the Lord will be pleased with such a confession. And every priest always feels when a person is hiding something and formalizing his confession. For him, this child ceases to be dear, one for whom he is always eagerly ready to pray. And, conversely, regardless of the severity of the sin, the deeper the repentance, the more the priest rejoices for the repentant. Not only the priest, but also the Angels in heaven rejoice for a sincerely repentant person.

– Is it necessary to confess a sin that you are absolutely sure to commit in the near future? How to hate sin?

– The Holy Fathers teach that the greatest sin is unrepentant sin. Even if we do not feel the strength to fight sin, we still need to resort to the Sacrament of Repentance. With God's help, if not immediately, then gradually we will be able to overcome the sin that has taken root in us. But don't overestimate yourself too much. If we lead a correct spiritual life, we will never be able to feel completely sinless. The fact is that we are all compliant, that is, we very easily fall into all kinds of sins, no matter how many times we repent of them. Each of our confessions is a kind of shower (bath) for the soul. If we constantly take care of the purity of our body, then all the more we need to take care of the purity of our soul, which is much more expensive than the body. So, no matter how many times we sin, we must immediately run to confession. And if a person does not repent of repeated sins, then they will entail other, more serious offenses. For example, someone is used to lying about little things all the time. If he does not repent of this, then in the end he may not only deceive, but also betray other people. Remember what happened to Judas. He first quietly stole money from the donation box, and then betrayed Christ Himself.

A person can hate sin only by fully experiencing the sweetness of God’s grace. While a person’s sense of grace is weak, it is difficult for him not to fall into a sin for which he has recently repented. The sweetness of sin in such a person turns out to be stronger than the sweetness of grace. That is why the holy fathers and especially St. Seraphim of Sarov so insist that the main goal of Christian life should be the acquisition of the grace of the Holy Spirit.

– If a priest tears up a note with sins without looking at it, are these sins considered forgiven?

– If the priest is perspicacious and knows how to read what is written in the note without looking into it, then, thank God, all sins are forgiven. If the priest does this because of his haste, indifference and inattention, then it is better to go to confession to someone else or, if this is not possible, confess your sins out loud, without writing them down.

– Is there a general confession in the Orthodox Church? How to feel about this practice?

– General confession, during which special prayers from the Trebnik are read, is usually held before individual confession. Holy Righteous John of Kronstadt practiced general confession without individual confession, but he did this forcedly because of the multitude of people who came to him for consolation. Purely physically, due to human weakness, he did not have enough strength to listen to everyone. In Soviet times, such confessions were also sometimes practiced, when there was one church for an entire city or region. Nowadays, when the number of churches and clergy has increased significantly, there is no need to make do with one general confession without individual ones. We are ready to listen to everyone, as long as there is sincere repentance.

Interviewed by Natalya Goroshkova

What is confession?

Why is it needed, and how to correctly name sins in confession?

Why do you need to confess to a priest?

How to properly prepare for the sacrament for those who want to repent for the first time?

Sooner or later, every Orthodox person asks himself all these questions.

Let's understand together all the intricacies of this sacrament.

Confession for an Orthodox person - what is it?

Repentance or confession is a sacrament during which a person verbally reveals his sins to God in the presence of a priest who has the authority to forgive sins from the Lord Jesus Christ Himself. During his earthly life, the Lord gave his apostles, and through them, all priests, the power to forgive sins. During confession, a person not only repents of his sins, but also makes a promise not to repeat them again. Confession is the cleansing of the soul. Many people think: “I know that all the same, even after confession, I will commit this sin again (for example, smoking). So why should I confess?” This is fundamentally wrong. You don’t think: “Why should I wash if I’m going to get dirty tomorrow anyway?” You still take a bath or shower because the body needs to be clean. Man is weak by nature and will continue to sin throughout his life. This is why confession is needed, to cleanse the soul from time to time and work on one’s shortcomings.

Confession is very important for an Orthodox person, because during this sacrament reconciliation with God occurs. You need to confess at least once a month, but if you have a need to do it more often, please do so. The main thing is to know how to correctly name sins in confession.

For some particularly serious sins, the priest may assign penance (from Greek “punishment” or “special obedience”). This could be prolonged prayer, fasting, almsgiving or abstinence. This is a kind of medicine that will help a person get rid of sin.

Some recommendations for those who want to confess for the first time

As before any sacrament, you need to prepare for confession. If you have decided to repent for the first time, then you need to find out when the sacrament is usually held in your temple. It is mainly held on holidays, Saturday and Sunday.

As a rule, on such days there are many people who want to confess. And this becomes a real obstacle for those who want to confess for the first time. Some are shy, while others are afraid of doing something wrong.

It would be good if, before your first confession, you contact the priest with a request to set up a time for you when you and the priest will be alone. Then no one will embarrass you.

You can make yourself a little “cheat sheet”. Write down your sins on a piece of paper so that you don’t miss anything out of excitement during confession.

How to correctly name sins in confession: what sins should be named

Many, especially those who have just begun their path to God, rush from one extreme to another. Some dryly list common sins, copied, as a rule, from church books on repentance. Others, on the contrary, begin to describe each sin committed in such detail that it no longer becomes a confession, but a story about themselves and their lives.

What sins should you name in confession? Sins are divided into three groups:

1. Sins against the Lord.

2. Sins against neighbors.

3. Sins against your soul.

Let's take a closer look at each one individually.

1. Sins against the Lord. Most modern people have become alienated from God. They do not visit temples or do so extremely rarely, and at best they have only heard about prayers. However, if you are a believer, have you been hiding your faith? Maybe you were embarrassed to cross yourself in front of people or say that you are a believer.

Blasphemy and murmuring against God- one of the most serious and grave sins. We commit this sin when we complain about life and believe that no one in the world is more unhappy than us.

Blasphemy. You have committed this sin if you have ever mocked the customs or sacraments of the Church about which you understand nothing. Jokes about God or the Orthodox faith are also blasphemy. It doesn’t matter whether you listen to them or tell them.

False oath or piety. The latter says that man has no fear of the greatness of the Lord.

Failure to fulfill your vows. If you made a vow to God to do some good deed, but did not keep it, this sin must be confessed.

We don’t pray every day at home. It is through prayer that we communicate with the Lord and the Saints. We ask for their intercession and help in the fight against our passions. Without prayer there can be neither repentance nor salvation.

Interest in occult and mystical teachings, as well as pagan and heterodox sects, sorcery and fortune telling. In fact, such interest can be not only destructive for the soul, but also for the mental and physical state of a person.

Superstition. In addition to the superstitions that we inherited from our pagan ancestors, we began to get carried away by the absurd superstitions of newfangled teachings.

Neglect of your soul. Moving away from God, we forget about our soul and stop paying due attention to it.

Suicidal thoughts, gambling.

2. Sins against neighbors.

Disrespectful attitude towards parents. We should treat our parents with reverence. The same applies to the attitude of students towards their teacher.

Offense inflicted on one's neighbor. By causing offense to loved ones, we harm his soul. We also commit this sin when we advise our neighbors something vicious or bad.

Slander. Speak falsehoods to people. Accusing a person without being sure of his guilt.

Schadenfreude and hatred. This sin is equivalent to murder. We must help and have compassion for our neighbors.

Grudge. It shows that our heart is filled with pride and self-justification.

Disobedience. This sin becomes the beginning of more serious evils: insolence against parents, theft, laziness, deception and even murder.

Condemn. The Lord said: “Judge not, lest ye be judged, for with the judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged; and with the measure you use, I will measure it to you." By judging a person for this or that weakness, we can fall into the same sin.

Theft, stinginess, abortion, theft, remembrance of the dead with alcoholic beverages.

3. Sins against your soul.

Laziness. We don’t go to church, we shorten our morning and evening prayers. We engage in idle talk when we should be working.

Lie. All bad deeds are accompanied by lies. No wonder Satan is called the father of lies.

Flattery. Today it has become a weapon to achieve earthly benefits.

Foul language. This sin is especially common among young people today. Foul language makes the soul coarse.

Impatience. We must learn to restrain our negative emotions so as not to harm our soul or offend our loved ones.

Lack of faith and disbelief. A believer should not doubt the mercy and wisdom of Our Lord Jesus Christ.

Charm and self-delusion. This is an imaginary closeness to God. A person suffering from this sin considers himself practically a saint and places himself above others.

Long Hiding of Sin. As a result of fear or shame, a person cannot reveal the sin he has committed in confession, believing that he can no longer be saved.

Despair. This sin often haunts people who have committed serious sins. It must be confessed in order to prevent irreparable consequences.

Blaming others and self-justification. Our salvation lies in the fact that we can recognize ourselves and only ourselves as guilty of our sins and actions.

These are the main sins that almost every person commits. If earlier during confession sins were voiced that were not repeated again, then there is no need to confess them again.

Fornication (including marriage without a wedding), incest, adultery (treason), sexual relations between people of the same sex.

How to correctly name sins during confession - is it possible to write them on paper and simply give them to the priest?

Sometimes, in order to get ready for confession and not worry about forgetting something during the sacrament, they write their sins on paper. In this regard, many people ask the question: can you write your sins on a piece of paper and just give it to the priest? A clear answer: No!

The meaning of confession is precisely for a person to voice his sins, mourn them and hate them. Otherwise, it will not be repentance, but writing a report.

Over time, try to completely abandon any paperwork, and tell in confession exactly what is weighing on your soul at this very moment.

How to correctly name sins in confession: where to start confession and how to end it

When approaching the priest, try to throw thoughts about earthly things out of your head and listen to your soul. Start your confession with the words: “Lord, I have sinned before You” and begin to list your sins.

There is no need to list sins in detail. If, for example, you stole something, then you do not need to tell the priest where, when and under what circumstances it happened. It’s enough to just say: I sinned by stealing.

However, it’s not worth listing sins completely dryly. For example, you come up and start saying: “I sinned with anger, irritation, condemnation, etc.” This is also not entirely correct. It would be better to say this: “I sinned, Lord, by being irritable to my husband” or “I constantly condemn my neighbor.” The fact is that during confession the priest can give you advice on how to deal with this or that passion. It is these clarifications that will help him understand the reason for your weakness.

You can end your confession with the words “I repent, Lord! Save and have mercy on me, a sinner!”

How to correctly name sins in confession: what to do if you are ashamed

Shame during confession is a completely normal phenomenon, because there are no people who would be pleased to talk about the less pleasant sides of themselves. But you don’t need to fight it, but try to survive it, endure it.

First of all, you must understand that you are not confessing your sins to a priest, but to God. Therefore, one should be ashamed not before the priest, but before the Lord.

Many people think: “If I tell the priest everything, he will probably despise me.” This is absolutely not important, the main thing is to ask God for forgiveness. You must clearly decide for yourself: to receive deliverance and cleanse your soul, or to continue to live in sins, plunging more and more into this dirt.

The priest is only an intermediary between you and God. You must understand that during confession the Lord Himself stands invisibly before you.

I would like to say once again that only in the sacrament of confession does a person with a contrite heart repent of his sins. After which a prayer of permission is read over him, which frees the person from sin. And remember, the one who hides sin during confession will acquire an even greater sin before God!

Over time, you will get rid of shame and fear and will better understand how to correctly name sins in confession.

The sacrament of confession is a test for the soul. It consists of a desire to repent, verbal confession, repentance for sins. When a person goes against the laws of God, he gradually destroys his spiritual and physical shell. Repentance helps to cleanse yourself. It reconciles a person with God. The soul is healed and receives strength to fight sin.

Confession allows you to talk about your wrongdoings and receive forgiveness. In excitement and fear, you can forget what you wanted to repent of. The list of sins for confession serves as a reminder, a hint. It can be read in full or used as an outline. The main thing is that the confession is sincere and truthful.

Sacrament

Confession is the main component of repentance. This is an opportunity to ask for forgiveness for your sins and to be cleansed of them. Confession gives spiritual strength to resist evil. Sin is a discrepancy in thoughts, words, and actions with God's permission.

Confession is a sincere awareness of wicked actions, a desire to get rid of them. No matter how difficult and unpleasant it may be to remember them, you should tell the clergyman in detail about your sins.

This sacrament requires a complete relationship between feelings and words, because the everyday listing of one’s sins will not bring true cleansing. Feelings without words are as ineffective as words without feelings.

There is a list of sins for confession. This is a large list of all obscene actions or words. It is based on the 7 deadly sins and 10 commandments. Human life is too diverse to be absolutely righteous. Therefore, confession is an opportunity to repent of sins and try to prevent them in the future.

How to prepare for confession?

Preparation for confession must take place several days in advance. A list of sins can be written on a piece of paper. You should read special literature about the sacraments of confession and communion.

One should not look for excuses for sins, one must recognize their wickedness. It is best to analyze your every day, analyzing what was good and what was bad. This daily habit will help you be more attentive to your thoughts and actions.

Before confession, you should make peace with everyone who was offended. Forgive those who offended. Before confession, it is necessary to strengthen the prayer rule. Add to the nightly reading the Canon of Repentance, the canons of the Theotokos.

One should separate personal repentance (when a person mentally repents of his actions) and the sacrament of confession (when a person talks about his sins in the desire to be cleansed of them).

The presence of a third party requires a moral effort to understand the depth of the offense and, through overcoming shame, will force you to look more deeply at the wrong actions. That is why a list of sins is so necessary for confession in Orthodoxy. It will help to identify what was forgotten or wanted to be hidden.

If you have difficulty compiling a list of sinful actions, you can purchase the book “Full Confession.” It is in every church shop. There is a detailed list of sins for confession and the features of the sacrament. Samples of confession and materials for preparing for it have been published.

Rules

Is there a heaviness in your soul, do you want to speak out, ask for forgiveness? After confession it becomes much easier. This is an open, sincere recognition and repentance of the wrongdoings committed. You can go to confession up to 3 times a week. The desire to be cleansed of sins will help overcome the feeling of stiffness and awkwardness.

The less frequent the confession, the more difficult it is to remember all the events and thoughts. The best option for holding the sacrament is once a month. Help in confession - a list of sins - will prompt you with the necessary words. The main thing is that the priest understands the essence of the offense. Then the punishment for sin will be justified.

After confession, the priest imposes penance in difficult cases. This is punishment, excommunication from the holy sacraments and God's grace. Its duration is determined by the priest. In most cases, the penitent faces moral and correctional work. For example, fasting, reading prayers, canons, akathists.

Sometimes the priest reads out the list of sins for confession. You can independently write a list of what has been done. It is better to come to confession after the evening service or in the morning, before the liturgy.

How does the sacrament work?

In some situations, you should invite the priest to confession at home. This is done if the person is seriously ill or near death.

Upon entering the temple, you must line up for confession. During the entire sacrament, the cross and the Gospel lie on the lectern. This symbolizes the invisible presence of the Savior.

Before confession begins, the priest may start asking questions. For example, about how often prayers are said, whether church rules are followed.

Then the sacrament begins. It is best to prepare your list of sins for confession. A sample of it can always be purchased at the church. If the sins forgiven at the previous confession were repeated, then they should be mentioned again - this is considered a more serious offense. You should not hide anything from the priest or speak in hints. You should clearly explain in simple words the sins you repent of.

If the priest tore up the list of sins for confession, it means that the sacrament is over and absolution has been granted. The priest places an epitrachelion on the head of the penitent. This means the return of God's favor. After this, they kiss the cross and the Gospel, which symbolizes readiness to live according to the commandments.

Preparing for Confession: List of Sins

Confession is intended to comprehend your sin and desire to improve. It is difficult for a person far from the church to understand what actions should be considered wicked. That's why there are 10 commandments. They clearly state what not to do. It is better to prepare a list of sins for confession according to the commandments in advance. On the day of the sacrament, you can get excited and forget everything. Therefore, you should calmly, a few days before confession, re-read the commandments and write down your sins.

If it is the first confession, then it is not easy to figure out the seven deadly sins and the ten commandments on your own. Therefore, you should approach the priest in advance and tell him about your difficulties in a personal conversation.

A list of sins for confession with an explanation of the sins can be purchased at the church or found on the website of your temple. The transcript describes in detail all the alleged sins. From this general list it is necessary to isolate what was done personally. Then write down your list of offenses.

Sins committed against God

Lack of faith in God, doubt, ingratitude.
Lack of a cross on the body, unwillingness to defend the faith in front of detractors.
Swearing in the name of God, pronouncing the name of the Lord in vain (not during prayer or conversations about God).
Visiting sects, casting fortunes, treating with all kinds of magic, reading and spreading false teachings.
Gambling, suicidal thoughts, swearing.
Failure to attend church, lack of a daily prayer rule.
Failure to observe fasts, reluctance to read Orthodox literature.
Condemnation of clergy, thoughts about worldly things during worship.
A waste of time on entertainment, watching TV, inactivity at the computer.
Despair in difficult situations, excessive reliance on oneself or someone else’s help without faith in God’s providence.
Concealing sins in confession.

Sins committed against neighbors

Hot temper, anger, arrogance, pride, vanity.
Lies, non-interference, ridicule, stinginess, extravagance.
Raising children outside of faith.
Non-repayment of debts, non-payment for work, refusal to help those who ask and those in need.
Unwillingness to help parents, disrespect for them.
Theft, condemnation, envy.
Quarrels, drinking alcohol at funerals.
Murder with words (slander, incitement to suicide or illness).
Killing a child in the womb, inducing others to have an abortion.

Sins committed against oneself

Foul language, pride, idle talk, gossip.
Desire for profit, enrichment.
Displaying good deeds.
Envy, lies, drunkenness, gluttony, drug use.
Fornication, adultery, incest, fornication.

List of sins for a woman to confess

This is a very sensitive list, and many women refuse to confess after reading it. You should not trust any information you read. Even if a brochure with a list of sins for a woman was purchased at a church store, be sure to pay attention to the stamp. There should be an inscription “recommended by the publishing council of the Russian Orthodox Church.”

The clergy do not divulge the secret of confession. Therefore, it is best to undergo the sacrament with a permanent confessor. The Church does not intrude into the sphere of intimate marital relationships. Issues of contraception, which is sometimes equated to abortion, are best discussed with a priest. There are drugs that do not have an abortifacient effect, but only prevent the birth of life. In any case, all controversial issues should be discussed with your spouse, doctor, or confessor.

Here is a list of sins for confession (brief):

She rarely prayed and did not attend church.
I thought more about worldly things during prayer.
Allowed sexual activity before marriage.
Abortion, inducing others to it.
Had unclean thoughts and desires.
I watched films, read books with pornographic content.
Gossip, lies, envy, laziness, resentment.
Excessive exposure of the body to attract attention.
Fear of old age, wrinkles, thoughts of suicide.
Addiction to sweets, alcohol, drugs.
Avoiding helping other people.
Seeking help from fortune tellers and sorcerers.
Superstition.

List of sins for a man

There is debate about whether a list of sins should be prepared for confession. Some believe that such a list harms the sacrament and promotes the formal reading of offenses. The main thing in confession is to realize your sins, repent and prevent their repetition. Therefore, the list of sins may be a short reminder or absent altogether.

Formal confession is not considered valid because there is no repentance in it. Returning after the sacrament to your former life will add hypocrisy. The balance of spiritual life lies in understanding the essence of repentance, where confession is only the beginning of awareness of one’s sinfulness. This is a long process consisting of several stages of internal work. The creation of spiritual resources is a systematic adjustment of conscience, responsibility for one’s relationship with God.

Here is a list of sins for confession (brief) for a man:

Sacrilege, conversations in the temple.
Doubt about faith, the afterlife.
Blasphemy, mockery of the poor.
Cruelty, laziness, pride, vanity, greed.
Evasion from military service.
Avoiding unwanted work, shirking responsibilities.
Insults, hatred, fights.
Slander, disclosure of other people's weaknesses.
Temptation to sin (fornication, drunkenness, drugs, gambling).
Refusal to help parents and other people.
Theft, aimless collecting.
Tendency to boast, argue, and humiliate others.
Impudence, rudeness, contempt, familiarity, cowardice.

Confession for a child

For a child, the sacrament of confession can begin at the age of seven. Until this age, children are allowed to receive Communion without this. Parents must prepare the child for confession: explain the essence of the sacrament, tell him why it is being performed, and remember with him possible sins.

The child must be made to understand that sincere repentance is preparation for confession. It is better for a child to write a list of sins himself. He must realize what actions were wrong and try not to repeat them in the future.

Older children make their own decisions about whether to confess or not. You should not limit the free will of a child or teenager. The personal example of parents is much more important than all conversations.

The child must remember his sins before confession. A list of them can be compiled after the child answers the questions:

How often does he read prayers (in the morning, in the evening, before meals), which ones does he know by heart?
Does he go to church, how does he behave during the service?
Does he wear a cross on his body, and is he distracted or not during prayers and services?
Have you ever deceived your parents or priest during confession?
Weren't you proud of your successes and victories, weren't you arrogant?
Does it fight or not with other children, does it offend children or animals?
Does he snitch on other children to protect himself?
Have you ever committed theft or been jealous of anyone?
Have you laughed at other people's physical disabilities?
Did you play cards (smoked, drank alcohol, tried drugs, used foul language)?
Is he lazy or helps his parents around the house?
Did you pretend to be sick to avoid your responsibilities?

A person himself determines whether to confess or not, how many times to attend the sacrament.
You should prepare a list of sins for confession. It is better to take a sample in the church where the sacrament will take place, or find it yourself in church literature.
It is optimal to go to confession with the same clergyman, who will become a mentor and will contribute to spiritual growth.
Confession is free of charge.

First you need to ask on what days confessions are held in the church. You should dress appropriately. For men - a shirt or T-shirt with sleeves, trousers or jeans (not shorts). For women - a scarf on the head, no makeup (at least lipstick), a skirt no higher than the knees.

Sincerity of Confession

A priest as a psychologist can recognize how sincere a person is in his repentance. There are confessions that offend the sacrament and the Lord. If a person mechanically talks about sins, has several confessors, hides the truth - such actions do not lead to repentance.

Behavior, tone of speech, words with which confession is pronounced - it all matters. This is the only way the priest understands how sincere the penitent is. Pangs of conscience, embarrassment, worries, shame contribute to spiritual cleansing.

Sometimes the personality of the priest is important for the parishioner. This is not a reason to condemn and comment on the actions of clergy. You can go to another church or turn to another holy father for confession.

It can be difficult to voice your sins. The emotional experiences are so strong that it is more convenient to make a list of unrighteous actions. Father is attentive to every parishioner. If, due to shame, it is impossible to tell about everything and the repentance is deep, then the priest has the right to forgive the sins, a list of which was compiled before confession, without even reading them.

The meaning of confession

Having to talk about your sins in front of a stranger is embarrassing. Therefore, people refuse to go to confession, believing that God will forgive them anyway. This is the wrong approach. The priest acts only as an intermediary between man and God. His task is to determine the measure of repentance. The priest has no right to condemn anyone; he will not expel a repentant person from the church. During confession, people are very vulnerable, and clergy try not to cause unnecessary suffering.

It is important to see your sin, recognize and condemn it in your soul, and voice it before the priest. Have a desire not to repeat your misdeeds again, try to atone for the harm done through acts of mercy. Confession brings revival of the soul, re-education and access to a new spiritual level.

Sins (list), Orthodoxy, confession imply self-knowledge and the search for grace. All good deeds are done through strength. Only by overcoming yourself, doing works of mercy, and cultivating virtues in yourself, can you receive God's grace.

The meaning of confession lies in understanding the typology of sinners, the typology of sin. At the same time, an individual approach to each repentant is akin to pastoral psychoanalysis. The sacrament of confession is the pain of awareness of sin, recognition of it, the determination to voice and ask for forgiveness for it, cleansing of the soul, joy and peace.

A person must feel the need to repent. Love for God, love for oneself, love for one's neighbor cannot exist separately. The symbolism of the Christian cross - horizontal (love for God) and vertical (love for oneself and one's neighbor) - lies in the awareness of the integrity of spiritual life, its essence.

Confession is an important event in the life of every believer. An honest and sincere sacrament is a way for a churched layperson to communicate with the Lord through a confessor. The rules of repentance consist not only in what words to start with, when you can undergo the ritual and what you need to do, but also in the obligation of humility and a conscientious approach to the preparation and procedure of confession.

Preparation

A person who decides to go to confession must be baptized. An important condition is to sacredly and unquestioningly believe in God and accept His Revelation. You need to know the Bible and understand the Faith, which is where visiting the church library can help.

You should remember and keep in mind, or better yet, write down on a piece of paper all the sins committed by the confessor from the age of seven or from the moment when the person accepted Orthodoxy. You should not hide or remember other people’s misdeeds, or blame other people for your own.

A person needs to give his word to the Lord that with His help he will eradicate sinfulness in himself and make amends for his base deeds.

Afterwards you need to prepare for confession. Before serving, you need to behave like an exemplary Christian:

the day before, pray diligently and re-read the Bible;
refuse entertainment and entertainment;
read the Penitential Canon.

What not to do before repentance

Before repentance, fasting is optional and is performed only at the request of the person. In any case, it should not be administered to small children, pregnant women and sick people.

Before the sacrament, a Christian abstains from physical and spiritual temptations. There is a ban on watching entertainment programs and reading entertainment literature. It is forbidden to spend time at the computer, play sports or be lazy. It is better not to attend noisy meetings and not to be in crowded companies, to spend the days before confession in humility and prayer.

How does the ceremony take place?

What time confession begins depends on the chosen church; it usually takes place in the morning or evening. The procedure begins before the Divine Liturgy, during and immediately after the evening service. Provided that he is under the auspices of his own confessor, the believer is allowed to agree with him individually when he will confess the person.

Before parishioners line up to see the priest, a general general prayer is read. There is a moment in its text at which the worshipers call their own name. This is followed by waiting for your turn.

There is no need to use the brochures issued in churches listing sins as a model for building your own confession. You should not thoughtlessly rewrite advice from there on what to repent of; it is important to take this as an approximate and generalized plan.

You need to repent honestly and sincerely, talking about a specific situation in which there was a place for sin. When reading out a standard list, the procedure becomes a formality and does not carry any value.

The confession ends with the confessor reading out the closing prayer. At the end of the speech, they bow their heads under the priest’s stole, and then kiss the Gospel and the cross. It is advisable to complete the procedure by asking for a blessing from the priest.

How to confess correctly

When performing the sacrament, it is important to adhere to the following recommendations:

Mention without concealment and repent of any evil committed. There is no point in attending communion if a person is not ready to humbly get rid of sins. Even if the meanness was committed many years ago, it is worth confessing to the Lord.
Do not be afraid of condemnation from the priest, since the communicant conducts a dialogue not with the minister of the church, but with God. The clergyman is obliged to keep the secret of the sacrament, so what is said during the service will remain hidden from prying ears. Over the years of church service, priests have forgiven all imaginable sins and they can only be upset by insincerity and the desire to hide evil deeds.
Keep feelings under control and expose sins with words.“Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted” (Matthew 5:4). But tears, behind which there is no clear awareness of one’s accomplishments, are not blissful. Feelings alone are not enough; most often those receiving communion cry out of self-pity and resentment.
The confession to which a person came to release emotions is useless, because such actions are aimed only at forgetting, but not at correction.
Do not hide your reluctance to admit your evil behind memory diseases. Confession “I repent that I have sinned in thought, word and deed” is usually not allowed into the procedure. You can receive forgiveness if it was complete and sincere. A passionate desire to undergo the procedure of repentance is required.
After remission of the most serious sins, do not forget about the rest. Having confessed his most evil deeds, a person goes through the very beginning of the real path to calming the soul. Mortal sins are rarely committed and are often greatly regretted, unlike minor offenses. By paying attention to the feelings of envy, pride or condemnation in his soul, a Christian becomes purer and more pleasing to the Lord. The work to eradicate small manifestations of cowardice is more difficult and longer than to atone for great evil. Therefore, you need to carefully prepare for each confession, especially for the one before which you cannot remember your sins.
To talk at the beginning of confession about what is more difficult to say than the rest. Living with the awareness of an act for which a person torments his soul every day, it can be difficult to admit it out loud. In this case, it is important to remember that the Lord sees and knows about everything and only expects repentance for what he has done. This means that at the very beginning of the dialogue with God, it is important to overcome yourself and state your terrible sin and sincerely ask for forgiveness for it.
The more meaningful and concise the confession, the better.. You need to state your sins briefly but succinctly. It is advisable to immediately get to the point. It is necessary that the priest immediately understand what the person who comes wants to repent of. You should not mention names, places and dates - this is unnecessary. It is best to prepare your story at home by writing it down, and then cross out everything that is unnecessary and interferes with understanding the essence.
Never resort to self-justification. Self-pity makes the soul languish and does not help the sinner in any way. Concealing perfect evil in one confession is not the worst thing a Christian can do. It is much worse if a similar situation is repeated. It is important to remember that by attending a sacrament, a person seeks liberation from sins. But he will not achieve this if he leaves them to himself, each time ending the confession with words about the insignificance of some offenses or about their necessity. It is better to state the situation in your own words without excuses.
Make an effort. Repentance is hard work that requires effort and time. Confession involves daily overcoming your own being on the path to a better personality. The sacrament is not an easy way to calm the senses. This is not a constant opportunity to seek help in a particularly difficult hour, to talk about painful things, to go out into the world as a new person with a pure soul. It is important to draw conclusions about your own life and actions.

List of sins

All sins committed by a person are conventionally divided into groups, depending on their content.

In relation to God

Doubt about one's own faith, the existence of God, and the truthfulness of the Holy Scriptures.
Long-term non-attendance to holy churches, confessions and communions.
Lack of diligence when reading prayers and canons, absent-mindedness and forgetfulness in relation to them.
Failure to keep promises made to God.
Blasphemy.
Suicidal intentions.
Mention of evil spirits in swearing.
Consumption of food and liquid before communion.
Failure to fast.
Work during church holidays.

In relation to one's neighbor

Reluctance to believe and help save someone else's soul.
Disrespect and disrespect for parents and elders.
Lack of action and motivation to help the poor, the weak, the grieving, the disadvantaged.
Suspicion of people, jealousy, selfishness or suspiciousness.
Raising children outside of the Orthodox Christian faith.
Committing murder, including abortion, or self-mutilation.
Cruelty or passionate love for animals.
Inflicting a curse.
Envy, slander or lies.
Grudge or insult to someone else's dignity.
Condemning other people's actions or thoughts.
Seduction.

In relation to yourself

Ingratitude and carelessness towards one's own talents and abilities, expressed in idle waste of time, laziness and empty dreams.
Shirking or completely ignoring one's own routine obligations.
Self-interest, stinginess, the desire for the strictest economy in order to accumulate money, or wasteful spending of the budget.
Theft or begging.
Fornication or adultery.
Incest, homosexuality, bestiality and the like.
Masturbation (this is a better name for the sin of masturbation) and viewing of depraved images, recordings and other things.
All kinds of flirtations and flirtations with the purpose of seduction or seduction, immodesty and disregard for meekness.
Drug addiction, drinking alcohol and smoking.
Gluttony or deliberate torture of oneself by hunger.
Eating animal blood.
Negligence towards one's health or excessive concern about it.

For women

Violation of church rules.
Neglect of reading prayers.
Eating, smoking, drinking in order to drown out resentment or anger.
Fear of old age or death.
Immodest behavior, debauchery.
Addiction to fortune telling.

Sacrament of repentance and communion

In the Russian Orthodox Church, the processes of confession and communion are inextricably linked. Although this approach is not canonical, it is nevertheless practiced in all corners of the country. Before a Christian can receive communion, he goes through the procedure of confession. This is required for the priest to understand that communion is served to an adequate believer who has fasted before the sacrament, who has stood the test of will and conscience, and who has not committed serious sins.

When a person is released from his evil deeds, an emptiness appears in his soul that needs to be filled with God, this can be done at communion.

How to confess to a child

There are no special rules for confession of children, except when they reach the age of seven. When leading your child to the sacrament for the first time, it is important to remember some nuances of your own behavior:

Do not tell the child about his main sins or write a list of what must be told to the priest. It is important that he prepares for repentance himself.
It is forbidden to interfere with church secrets. That is, ask the offspring questions: “how do you confess,” “what did the priest say,” and the like.
You cannot ask your confessor for special treatment of your child, or ask about the successes or delicate moments of the church life of your son or daughter.
It is necessary to take children to confession less often before they are of conscious age, since there is a high probability that confession will turn from a sacrament into a routine habit. This will result in memorizing a list of your minor sins and reading them to the priest every Sunday.
Confession for a child should be comparable to a holiday, so that he goes there with an understanding of the sacredness of what is happening. It is important to explain to him that repentance is not a report to an adult, but a voluntary recognition of evil in oneself and a sincere desire to eradicate it.
You should not deny your offspring the opportunity to independently choose a confessor. In a situation in which he liked another priest, it is important to allow him to confess to this particular minister. Selecting a spiritual mentor is a delicate and intimate matter that should not be interfered with.
It is better for an adult and a child to attend different parishes. This will give the child the freedom to grow up independent and conscious, not tolerating the oppression of excessive parental care. When the family does not stand in the same line, the temptation to overhear the child’s confession disappears. The moment when the offspring becomes capable of voluntary and sincere confession becomes the beginning of the path of separation of the parents from him.

Examples of Confession

Women's

I, the churched Mary, repent of my sins. I was superstitious, which is why I visited fortune tellers and believed in horoscopes. She held resentment and anger towards her loved one. She exposed her body too much when going out in order to get someone else's attention. I hoped to seduce men I didn’t know, I thought about the carnal and obscene.

I felt sorry for myself and thought about stopping living on my own. She was lazy and idly spent her time doing stupid pleasure activities. I couldn't stand the fast. She prayed and attended church less often than expected. Reading the canons, I thought about the worldly, and not about God. Allowed sexual intercourse before marriage. I thought about dirty things and spread rumors and gossip. I thought about the uselessness of church services, prayers and repentance in life. Forgive me, Lord, for all the sins of which I am guilty and accept the word of further correction and chastity.

Men's

Servant of God Alexander, I confess to my God, Father, Son and Holy Spirit, my evil deeds from youth to this day, committed consciously and unconsciously. I repent of sinful thoughts about someone else’s wife, inducing others to use intoxicating substances and leading an idle lifestyle.

Five years ago, I zealously deviated from military service and participated in the beating of innocent people. He ridiculed church foundations, the laws of holy fasts and divine services. I was cruel and rude, which I regret and ask the Lord to forgive me.

Children's

I, Vanya, sinned and came to ask for forgiveness for it. Sometimes I was rude to my parents, didn’t keep my promises, and got irritated. I played on the computer for a long time and walked with friends instead of reading the Gospel and praying. I recently drew it on my hand and snapped when my godfather asked me to wash off what I had done.

Once I was late for service on Sunday, and after that I didn’t go to church for a month. Once I tried to smoke, which caused me to quarrel with my parents. I did not attach the necessary importance to the advice of my father and elders, and deliberately acted contrary to their words. I offended people close to me and rejoiced in grief. Forgive me, God, for my sins, I will try not to let this happen.

Confession is one of the Christian sacraments, when a Christian repents of his sins before a priest. But few Orthodox Christians know how to properly confess and what happens after this sacrament. Priests consider repentance to be the second baptism: upon confession, a person is completely cleansed of sins.

Sinful acts in Christianity

Before repentance, you should know the list of actions that are considered sinful in Christianity. Sins are divided according to the following criteria:

Against God.
Against yourself.
Against your neighbors.

Sins against the Lord

Every Orthodox person should know the main sins against the Lord.

Sins against yourself

You might think that sins against oneself are not so important, this is a delusion, because we are all a part of the Lord. We must take great care of ourselves, your thoughts, your body. Main sins against oneself:

Sins against your neighbors

Sins against loved ones are punished especially severely. We must treat others the way we want to be treated.

Major sins against another person:

There are special requirements for believing women in the Orthodox faith, because it is the woman who raises the children and she must instill in them the love of God by your example. There is a separate list of sins for women to confess:

Preparing for Confession

Before going to church, you need to know how to prepare for confession and communion. First, you need to realize your sins and repent of them sincerely, have a great desire to leave your sin behind and move on with faith in the Lord.

You must understand that true confession is more than just listing your sins in front of a priest. The Lord already knows all your sins; He is waiting for you to realize your sins and sincerely wish to get rid of them. Only after true repentance can one expect that after confession your soul will feel better.

You can take a piece of paper and write down all your sins that weigh on your soul. The written piece of paper can be given to a spiritual mentor for cleaning, but especially serious sins should be told out loud.

Repentance should be brief, you don’t need to tell the whole story of your quarrel with your loved ones, tell only about how you condemned your loved ones or relatives, your anger or envy. It is a very good practice to analyze your day every evening before evening prayer and repent before the icon.

To confess, you must first find out when the sacrament of confession takes place in the church. In large churches, the sacrament of confession is performed daily. In those churches where there are no daily services, you need to familiarize yourself with the schedule.

If after confession you feel like this and it hasn’t gotten any easier, you haven’t believed in God enough, the grace that comes to an Orthodox believer after sincere repentance is not yet available to you.

The Church is always glad to see all people who come to confession. Even the biggest sinners have the right to believe in God and repent of their sins. Priests are usually very welcoming to parishioners and help them in the process, pushing them to the right words and conclusions.

Confession is held either in the morning or in the evening. You must not be late for the sacrament, as it begins with prayer, in which every penitent must participate. During the prayer service, the priest asks everyone who came to give their name. Women are not allowed to attend the sacrament during their period.

You can learn how to confess correctly, what to say to the priest, from your believing parents who have undergone this sacrament more than once. You should know that a good confessor will always help and guide you. Sins need to be named briefly, it is important to name all the sins; you cannot say some and keep silent about others. If you have already had your sins forgiven in the previous Sacrament, you do not need to name them this time. Always confess from the same priest, you should not look for another out of a sense of your own shame; by doing this, you are trying to deceive God and yourself.

In large churches, when there are a lot of people who want to confess and it is not possible to devote time to everyone, the priest can conduct a “general confession.” The confessor lists the most common sins and those standing before him repent of these sins. If you have never confessed before or a lot of time has passed since your last repentance, do not repent at a general confession, wait until everyone has left and ask him to listen to you. During individual absolution, the priest will place an epitrachelion on your head, which looks like a scarf; after absolution, he will remove it.

During the sacrament, Father may ask you questions, there is no need to be embarrassed, answer calmly. A parishioner can also ask questions; there is no need to be ashamed of this, because confession exists for this purpose, so that a person can find the righteous path to God. After repentance, the priest reads a prayer for the remission of sins, and each parishioner kisses the cross and the Gospel. If a person has prepared in advance for confession, the priest gives permission to receive communion.

You should choose your clothes very carefully; men should wear trousers and a long-sleeved shirt. Women also need to dress modestly, outerwear should cover their shoulders and décolleté, and wear a headscarf. Women are not allowed to wear makeup for confession; it is not recommended to wear high-heeled shoes, it will be difficult to survive service in them.

How to prepare for confession to a child

Children under seven years of age are considered infants and can receive communion without confession. Try to prepare the baby for communion in a few days, read the Holy Scriptures or children's Orthodox literature. When preparing, reduce the time you watch TV or the computer, and help your child pray. If a child does bad things or uses foul language, you need to shame him.

After seven years, children can be confessed on an equal basis with adults; in the church there are certain allowances for children’s sins, since they can commit the sins listed above by accident.

How to prepare for communion

After confession, the sacrament of communion occurs; this can be performed on the same day. Before communion, you need to fast for three days, and a week before that, read akathists to the saints and the Mother of God. Before communion you cannot drink or eat; in the morning after waking up you need to read prayers. During confession, the priest will definitely ask you about this.

Preparation for communion also involves giving up smoking, alcohol and intimacy with a partner. You cannot swear before this sacred sacrament; this is very important, because you are about to receive the blood and body of the Lord. Standing in front of the Chalice of Christ, you need to keep your hands crossed on your chest, and before eating bread and wine, you need to say your name.

The church store has a lot of special literature that will help you prepare for communion correctly and prepare your child for confession.

Remember that confession and communion must be included in your spiritual life. Confessors recommend going to the sacrament of confession once every six months. How often to do this is up to you, but after such a sacrament you will feel much better and you will be freed from the thoughts that weigh on you.