I have a son and we live to the fullest every day. Adult son, psychologist's advice

My son wants to get married. He's almost 12 and he thinks it's the right age to think about it. He is terribly funny, my Dimych. I record his witticisms on Facebook with the hashtag #Dimychsays.

For example this:

“There was talk of boastfulness.

— Here I never praise myself, because I am the greatest non-praiser! my son modestly remarked. Or this:

And then quietly under his breath: just do not overpraise, do not overpraise ... "

My son can move four fingers. He has SMA - spinal muscular atrophy - an incurable progressive disease.

When we met and became friends, (he then lived in an orphanage) he asked me: Why should I die before everyone else?

Now he does not ask, although sometimes he wants to talk to me about death. A week ago, he was worried about whether the girl Lelya, who is not even a year old, will live to see her 10th birthday. I don't know.

We all do not know when our children will die, but we know that we will most likely bury them. Someone tomorrow, someone in a few years. We are the parents of children with SMA. So far, I know only one person with SMA who outlived his mother. And you don't envy him.

Because our children need to be turned over at night. Not once, not twice. every night of their lives. You need to scratch their noses when it itches. Raise your fallen head if the stroller has run into a bump (it can even be a layer of paint on a zebra). Raise your arms, stretch your legs. Carry them on hand at all times. Even if they weigh 50 kilograms. I still constantly hold Dimych's head - in motion it falls.

Many of us hear:

This is for your sins!

And they told me.

I answer: no, for joy!

Passers-by cry sometimes: What a grief!

I answer: This is my happiness!

They don't believe.

We are all told a lot. It happens, relatives. Sometimes doctors. Recently, an orthopedist from the clinic admired how twisted Dima was, measured the angles of contractures: “An interesting case! Let's see how it progresses!"

On the street, children point their fingers at us. For me, this was the hardest thing at first. The finger was pointed every day.
Now I don't notice it. Many things no longer matter. I have a son and we live to the fullest every day. Because tomorrow may never come.

We climbed mountains and swam in different seas, rode a tractor and flew in an airplane, took a steam bath in a village bathhouse and skated on the ice of Lake Baikal, drove two hours to school and drove at great speed on roller coasters, were at noisy festivals and sat for a long time with a fishing rod near the nearest pond. Traveling is not easy for me, but it's fun)
We laugh every day and sometimes we fight. And we make up very quickly. We have many friends, he and I have. And I have more of them with the advent of Dimych.

Since he appeared, I often repeat: the Lord gives generously and with two hands! And I'm grateful.

It wasn't always like that. There were some very difficult nights. I wrote about one on Facebook:

"Night. Moan. More. And further. The moans are getting louder. I jump up and start to think frantically what's wrong. I laid the norms: on the right side, but not completely filled up, but on a millet pillow, which I roll up to the edge of the bed at night. She tilted her head all the way, wrapped the lower ear, the upper one on this side does not need to be covered. She shook her ass, stretched her arms down the pillow (it is long, 24 kg of millet in this sausage), stretched her legs forward and down, laid a pillow, did not press the foot of the lower leg.
BUT! Time to flip! I turn to the “modern back” - the wing: the head is straight, the legs are standing, the butt is straight. I lie down for 2 minutes. Moan. Moan. Moan!!!

Yeah, I'll try on the other side: fill up to the end, remove the pillow between the legs, butt back all the way, pull the calf of the upper leg onto the knee of the lower one, arms forward and hang, tilt the head a little, wrap the lower ear, cover the upper one.
1 minute. Moan. Moan. Moan!!! I measure oxygen. I'm probably lower now. Moan.

- Dim, what?

- Put your feet up!

Back flip. I put my legs - they collapse. I bet - they collapse. I bet - they stand!

1 minute. Moan. Moan! Moan!!!

Legs collapse. The body collapses. Hands hang from the bed.

Asleep! snores)

And I don't want to. Turned on the Internet, went to the kitchen. I decided to describe my nightly adventures in an easy and fun Wodehouse way.

Nadia comes: Mus, Dima is moaning!

I turned it over to millet according to the first option. I sit nearby. I'm waiting.

Here, some sleepless people ask, why am I not sleeping at night. And that)"

"Insomnia. You sit in the kitchen, drink milk and think about your problems: about gray hair and sores that do not go away for a long time; about compensation for the corset, which will not go to the account in any way, and whether it will, but you need to make a new one already, .. and about everything in the world that torments and worries in recent days.

And suddenly a scream-groan comes from the room, and you rush at breakneck speed, crashing into corners and the door, and after a few seconds you are on your knees by the bed and muttering pitifully-guilty: What, son? Where to turn you? Stretch your legs?
And my heart is beating fast. Because alive. Alive! And it's not scary. It doesn't really matter, to be honest.)

One mother of a guy with SMA then answered me: “Tanya, I understand you) We live with fear and great hope. If you live in fear, you will go crazy, if you live in hope alone, you can overlook something in your state, so we are balancing like tightrope walkers.

There were nights when I couldn't sleep at all. Oxygen was below low and I was afraid he would die right now. I stupidly drove these sleepless nights into the search engine: how children with the second type of SMA die. And I couldn't find the answer anywhere. She only prayed: “Lord, not now! I am not ready!" Many nights in a row.

Then Alena, a psychologist from the children's hospice, helped me a lot. She said, “Don't bury him ahead of time! If you bury him now and later, when he dies, when will he live?”. And she advised me to ask the doctor how such children die.

Our resuscitator Sasha told me everything. And it didn't get any easier for me. I just flew! I was taught the first resuscitation steps. We talked with Dimka about what is possible and what is not. He is against resuscitation in the hospital, tracheostomy and connection to a ventilator. I have to do what I can and then let him go. We so agreed.

Sometimes I still lose heart, and faith helps me. I know our souls don't die. And that we will definitely see each other later, when I also die.

And while we are alive, we live together and have fun. Sometimes it’s even surprising: I took him home to die, and we live and rejoice.
And I admire other parents. You are my heroes, grandparents, mothers and fathers, brothers and sisters of children with SMA!

We are a family. And I'm proud of it.

Statuses about a son are beautiful - A son is a man who can never stop loving.

Happiness for a mother is the smile of a baby that she carried under her heart for months ... The first word and the first step when her son falls asleep in her arms. Her happiness cannot be measured in years ... Happiness for a woman is simply to be a mother!

Mom bent over the bed at night and quietly whispers to her little one: “Just don’t get sick, my sweet bunny, I beg you, just don’t get sick.” When the illness approaches the child, The mother’s soul cries. And mother does not fall asleep until the morning, pressing the baby's hand to her cheek.

You sleep, my little friend, Innocent heart of an angel. I'll quietly go to the bed, And kiss you on the cheek...

My precious son... My own blood,
I fill myself with great pride,
So boundless to the son of mother's love,
I can't imagine my life without you...

One day my son said to me - I want them to be ... Like a bird you have ... such Wings ... It began to fly on my shoulder, I felt strength ... “And where will I fly?” I asked him... My son answered - Nowhere... Mothers don't fly!!! Mothers are always wings ... Children are closed ...

It's good to have a son! He is the best of men!
My sun is a golden ray, a smile that is always with me!
There is no more beautiful happiness in the world! He is a bright light of my soul!
It's good to have a son! He is the most important of men!

Kiss gently soft hand,
I'll barely touch my nose with my lips,
My heart skips a beat in love for my son
For me there is no better creature in the world!

A miracle walks around the apartment, There is no one in the world that he loves. Like a saucer-eye lake, a small gnome from a fairy tale

If the Lord wants to protect a woman, then he gives her a son ...

The best man in the world got me! He calls me "mom"!

Only when you come to the crib where your little baby sleeps do you really understand what happiness is.

Diapers, cereals are an inevitability; And you can't avoid other troubles. But the main thing is that kindred tenderness, which the baby gave you. You will endure any trials, Now nothing can scare you, Above the titles of all - only one title, One irreplaceable title - mother! Now you will not be bored now, Now all sorrows will come to naught - When the baby will stretch out his hands to you And say: “Mommy! I love you so much!"

Sooner or later, happiness comes into the life of every woman ... It is very easy to recognize him: he has the most delicious cheeks, the most tender smile, and the most sincere eyes!

I'm standing by my son's bed
He fell asleep, but I can't sleep.
My little man grew up
I came to pray for him.

Do you know what babies smell like? Almond milk, dew at dawn… Caramelized hands, milk chocolate. Daisies in the garden. Fragrant grapes... Inhaling the smell of childhood, the only one in the world, I can say for sure that children smell of happiness!!!

You are my son - my happiness, we will overcome all bad weather ... I will dream of yours - to protect and protect you ... I have been waiting for you for a long time ... You are now my whole life ... How I love you !!!

I have an angel, and his name is son! And the son has security, and the security is called - mom!

It's good to have a son! He is the best of men! My sun is a golden ray, a smile that is always with me! There is no more beautiful happiness in the world! He is a bright light of my soul! It's good to have a son! He is the most important of men

There is only one man in my life who can't stand it when I stand at the stove or do the dishes. He takes my hand and leads me to dance. This man is my little son.

Hugging my son tighter
And the smell of feeling it,
I praise God that I am alive ...
Nothing else is needed...

I am raising a man
Good, beautiful,
Affectionate son!
Proud and bold
Very hardworking!
Loving, sweet
Real son!

There is no greater happiness in the world
Than to hear the son's first cry,
And look at him, admiring,
Realizing: “He is the most beautiful!”

We love you for no particular reason
Because you are a grandson
Because you are a son
For being a baby
For what you grow
Because he looks like mom and dad.
And this love until the end of your days
It will remain your secret support.

I love you to shiver
I love you to the point of awe
My child, my good
My imprint, my mark

I hug my son
Strong and warm
While the cheek smells
Childhood and kindness.

I have been given a great role.
Being the mother of a beautiful son...
I am very proud of you
My little man!

He lies on the bed, lifts his legs, sniffs softly with his nose, opens his eyes. I love this boy more than life! My good, my dear little son!

I really believe and hope that at the hour when the time comes,
I'll tell a grown man: "I'm so proud of you, son!"

The top of the head on the son's head... That's the sweetest thing in this life... Kiss... and don't need sweets... And it doesn't matter how old the son is... It's still sweet to kiss...

There is one angel on earth who holds at least two hearts in his little hands, makes you smile and does not let you get bored - this is mother's and father's joy. Little bandit, little general, sweet son.

My son - my wings behind my back! My son is my stars above the earth! My son is my happiness forever! My son - you are my air and water!

Here it is, happiness ... This is what all mothers think when they take their baby in their arms for the first time. However, time passes, the periods of "bellies" and "teeth" are replaced by bumps and bruises, followed by strikes about studies and the first romantic (and not so) experiences.

And when it seems that the child has finally matured, an unpleasant surprise awaits many: it turns out that the folk wisdom “little children are little troubles” is absolutely true. Your adult son began to give you much more trouble than in childhood.

Rudeness and secrecy

More often, mothers complain about the rudeness of their sons and their secrecy. A young man or a man categorically does not want to trust them with his experiences, but the mother's heart is sensitive and feels all the changes in the life and behavior of a beloved child. Patience is enough for a couple of days, but then the mother begins, and sometimes does not stop, attempts to talk heart to heart.

Everything seems to be fine, because the questions are quite innocent - “how are you” or “what happened”, and the time was chosen right, right after dinner ... But for some reason, the son is silent at first, and a little later he begins to be impudent or frankly rude, and only tears his mother's eyes briefly stop him. What's wrong?

The solution to the problem of rudeness is simple: remember that you are a girl and he is a boy. The difference in age or social status means absolutely nothing, the masculine or feminine principle is nature itself. And she endowed her creations not only with a different set of chromosomes, but also with completely different hormonal levels.

Men due to testosterone and adrenaline are more impatient, aggressive and uncompromising. “Pour out your sorrows” is for young ladies, and not for the sons of Mars: they are generally sure that talking about peace of mind is complete nonsense, and they don’t consider this a problem.

Now let's practice: imagine that you are being pestered with the question “Why wash the dishes?” You hinted three times that you are not interested in the topic, moreover, you are terribly tired. The question is repeated again, but under a different sauce: “Why wash the dishes?”, And so ten more times.

How will your patience be tested? Either run away, or "explode" and send the opponent somewhere, but away from you. So an adult son feels after “how are you” and “what happened”.

What to do? Be patient and remember that your child is already an adult. He can solve his problems on his own, and heart-to-heart conversations are deeply alien to men. It is clear that such a simple action is difficult to perform, but a normal mother has a very trained nervous system.

You will have to put yourself and your feelings back in first place from the end, and make the obvious and very unpopular decision not to interfere in the private life of a man, even if he is your son.

Doesn't want to work, wants money

How is it with the classics - “horses die from work”? And you, mother, are you still alive?.. Believe me, your parasite son knows perfectly well that in any case he will receive food and shelter, even if he does nothing. After all, you love him so much that you forgive absolutely everything! Dear baby, he simply has not grown up to understand that a man should provide for his family, he has such poor health ...

And his nerves are really bad, he always experiences such failures in finding a job ... The boss, an ugly type, did not forgive him even the smallest things ... Familiar? Apparently yes. Like? If “no”, we are looking for a way out, if “yes”, we continue to feed and love, hoping for the best.

What to do? First: first we finish lisping. The child is fully formed physically and mentally, ready for all situations, including supporting himself and helping you. This is important to understand. Second: we mercilessly break the comfort zone that envelops your son. To do this, we change our behavior, preferably radically - we stop indulging whining and at least we cut portions for lunch.

Most importantly: be sure and defiantly reduce your work activity! Let him wash his own socks, washes the dishes and cooks if your cooking no longer suits him. Otherwise, it will become overgrown with dirt and lose some weight, and after listening to your complaints about the lack of time and money for the hundredth time, it will at least start running outside and breathing fresh air.

No joke: a woman, even if she is a mother, is obliged to keep a man in good shape precisely due to her weakness, otherwise there may be nothing left of his credo. You say tough? But it works.

Started to study, but suddenly stopped going to classes

What is the reason? I liked it - I didn’t like it ... You won’t believe it, but it’s exactly like that! Men always do only what they want, unlike women who do what they must, literally in the "background", without even noticing. Do you think about dishes a lot when you wash them? Surely you sing songs or remember what you haven’t done yet.

And a man completely surrenders to any occupation, with all his soul and body. If he does not like it, and the background mode characteristic only of the female psyche “does not turn on”, then the representative of the stronger sex begins to slip away like a first-grader and run away from an unpleasant task or sabotage its implementation.

What to do? Try to help your son find the attractive aspects of studying. Naturally, from his point of view, not from yours. You know your child, you know his system of material and spiritual values. It sounds pompous, but in fact you can’t say it better. For example, he loves sports cars. Strengthen your motivation, for starters, give a model of the right brand, let him admire it.

Wait a bit, then drop a couple of phrases like: “You know, today I saw Vita's mother. He has already graduated and he was hired, he is getting decently. He is going to buy a car ... How quickly time has flown by! Or something like that, but always with a slight sigh at the end and a phrase about time.

For what? Your son will think a little about the car, and with Vitya they generally studied in the same class, and your grades were better. And then there's "time flew by quickly." Conclusions: he is no worse, and even much better than Viti (rivalry), you need to study (otherwise you won’t see the desired car), and some discomfort with studying is worth it, especially since the time before the diploma will pass very quickly (the comfort zone has been restored). So the scheme is simple.

My son does not leave the computer, he constantly plays

Life in the virtual world attracts with limitless possibilities, and almost no effort is required, except to click the mouse ... If "in real life" your adult son is dissatisfied with himself, does not receive or is unable to receive what he (in his opinion) deserves, then leaving into virtuality is natural.

Toys with gorgeous graphics, friends and clans, omnipotence. Even if they kill, it doesn’t matter, there are lives in reserve; the girl went to her rival - nothing, the lioness from the neighboring pride has been making eyes for a long time ...

All problems in the painted world are solved simply, unlike the present, and nothing is scary. Moreover: even the name is made up, you can change it at any time, and no one will recognize you. Mistakes are forgiven, retribution is symbolic, and life is eternal. Who would refuse such a thing? Therefore, adult sons choose the game in order to prolong the period of irresponsibility and impunity, as in early childhood. Why?

Because they are afraid of the irreversibility that is so characteristic of the real world. A dead friend cannot be returned, the girl went to another and also - not returned, the years pass and change the world, which will never be the same. Scary to say the least. But you won’t be able to play hide and seek with yourself forever, sooner or later you will have to emerge and look reality in the eye. Cowardice is the worst sin. This is what Yeshua said at Bulgakov's, and this is confirmed by life.

Of course, you shouldn't be as harsh with your son about his temporary weakness, but the truth is that your child is afraid to live. What to do? Remember the times when you punished him for mistakes or criticized his appearance, compared (not in his favor) with other boys. Perhaps you are a too domineering mother, who repeatedly encroached on his independence and as a result received a computer zombie ...

If it's not too late, try to awaken in your son a taste for life. Remember what he really loves and values, and remind him of this without criticizing and merging into his current world. To get started, just put fragrant tea and something tasty next to the computer, always smelling good, and silently leave.

You can smell the smell without looking at the bun, and get a little distracted from the game. Stay next time, exchange a few words.

Everything is reminiscent of taming, small steps to restore trust. And if the son trusts you, he will go: first by the hand, like a little one, and then - into life.

Then let him go himself, and you will be happy for your adult son ... Good luck to him and to you.

Albina was left an orphan when she was 6 years old, now she has a child and she has been waiting for her housing for a long time. A real miracle: her turn came up and the municipal housing stock of the city suddenly received an apartment as a gift.

Only now, thanks to decentralization, we finally have the opportunity to purchase housing for those on the waiting list, - Liman mayor Petr Tsimidan told FACTS. - Funds for this are included in the budget, and now we are advertising purchases in local media.

During the past year, with the support of the regional administration, the community of Liman purchased ten apartments for orphans. However, the problem of providing housing for children deprived of parental care remains acute for any community in a small town. The gift of Arkady Anatolyevich Boyarov became a real New Year's miracle for the orphan on the waiting list and her son.

Arkady Boyarov is 85 years old, a pensioner owned a two-room apartment in a five-story building. He appealed to the city council with a request:

I am leaving the city and I want to donate my apartment to an orphan child so that this person can confidently go towards his goal ... I wish the future owner to cultivate wisdom, kindness and responsiveness in himself. Do good to people and it will come back to you a hundredfold.

The apartment is two-room, which means that it must be transferred to a family in which there are at least two people. It turned out that the turn of Albina and her baby had just come up. The keys to the apartment were handed over to the girl.

I believed that miracles happen! Albina said. In general, I'm lucky with people. I already called Arkady Anatolyevich, congratulated him on the New Year and invited him to visit.

He left a TV set, a sofa, a piece of kitchen furniture in the apartment, which will not be superfluous to me. This year I am graduating from a music and pedagogical school and I plan to get a job at a music school in Liman, where I spent my childhood.

Albina's mother died, and the girl ended up in a shelter. Later, childless spouses took her into the family, they raised her as their own. It so happened that the parents divorced and parted, Albina communicates with her foster mother even now. Grandmother lives in Liman, Albina sees her.

When the girl graduated from high school and music school, she entered the music school in Bakhmut. After Albina became a mother, her studies had to be postponed. Matvey has already grown up and went to kindergarten, the young mother returned to her studies.

It turned out that the pensioner, who donated housing to the city, moved in with the woman. Arkady Anatolyevich traveled to many places on the Earth, led the motor transport sector at one of the sites of the grandiose construction of Soviet times - BAM (Baikal-Amur Mainline), then - in the Magadan region, at house-building plants in the Donetsk region, was the head of a large bus fleet in the Crimea. A retired man from the age of 69, he was unable to build a strong family and did not acquire offspring.

I recently put a new monument to my mother and myself in the cemetery - so that no one would have to worry about it after my funeral, - Arkady Boyarov told reporters. - I may not have enough time to deal with the sale of the apartment. I decided: let someone in need take advantage of this housing.

Do good to people, and it will return to you a hundredfold, - advises pensioner Arkady Boyarov.

This is an incredible collection of destinies, collected by one woman throughout her life. Most of the stories are the stories of her colleagues, a few from the life of relatives or acquaintances of the author.

My son's girlfriend is provincial

My son's girlfriend, to be honest, I didn't like it right away: from a small town, with a stamp of provinciality in her manners and face, who has not yet achieved anything in life, but self-confident and immodest. I drew these conclusions from several cases when my husband and I, returning from the dacha, found her in her son's room.

She usually didn't leave right away. When leaving, she tried to catch my husband and I in the eyes. We greeted each other calmly. With our son (by that time he was already 28 years old, he was finishing his graduate school) it was impossible to talk about the topics of his girlfriends (and this one, of course, was not the first) from the very beginning - from the age of 20.

Nevertheless, I voiced my wishes to him on this matter: I would like to see an educated girl from a metropolitan family next to my son, good appearance, to match my son, and with decent manners. The son knew about this, and, it seemed to me, he was embarrassed by that girlfriend.

After a year or so, she stopped visiting us, and almost immediately she was replaced by a girl who liked both me and my husband. By the time they started talking about the wedding, the son had completed graduate school and was preparing for defense. Therefore, it was decided that the wedding would take place after the defense.

I was very pleased with the final choice of my son, my husband also did not hide his sympathy for the future daughter-in-law.

It was during this happy time that I saw my son's penultimate girlfriend - the "provincial", as we called her between ourselves with her husband. She stood in front of me in line at the cash desk of the Centralny supermarket, and I could no longer go out with a cart to another cash desk.

When she saw me, she greeted me, I, too, exchanged a few meaningless pleasantries, when she had already paid, and, nodding goodbye to me, she left the cash register, it seemed to me that she was pregnant. At that moment, I was so reluctant to know for sure that I turned to the cashier.

I increasingly remembered our "provincial"

The wedding was a holiday - you can’t refuse your son and daughter-in-law in taste - everything was in moderation, very dignified and beautiful. And after the wedding, it turned out that life in our country was not included in the plans of the daughter-in-law, that she had already found work for herself and her son (she is a top manager with knowledge of two languages) - and they left first for Germany, and a year later - for America, in San Francisco.

Looking ahead: for all 7 years of their life in America, we were there twice a month. They say it's a lot. But we had one son. My husband and I felt sad and lonely after leaving.

On our first visit, the children bought a house, very small and modest by American standards, but in a good location - the nearest suburb of Frisco (as the children called the city among themselves). When I asked if they were going to please us with grandchildren, my daughter-in-law laughed and said that, of course, there will be children, but only when their parents are confident in the future.

The daughter-in-law is younger than her son, she could take her time, age allowed. The parents of the daughter-in-law also left quite soon - to their son, the brother-in-law of the daughter-in-law, to Israel. His wife is a Jewess, according to some program she studied in Israel right after school, and having received an education, she called her future husband to her - her school love, and her parents, and her husband's parents.

The parents of the daughter-in-law, very worthy people, called us quite often, kept us informed of all the affairs of their large Israeli family, and we knew that they were simply crazy about their daughter-in-law, she arranged everything, found a job for everyone and taught the language.

But the most important thing is that she gave birth to four children one after another, and conversations always sooner or later came down to the main news - everything that concerned these brilliant children. They sent us photos of them by e-mail - they were always there in the hands of grandparents.

I was increasingly reminded of our "provincial". Strange, but I already wanted her to really be pregnant then - in time, this meant that, most likely, she was carrying our grandson. And one day, after another happy monologue of my mother-in-law, I decided to try to find this girl.

I myself stood next to the adult who opened me ... at the age of 5

Through a friend of the son who remained in Minsk. A friend somehow very quickly found her coordinates for me. It turned out that the girl returned home from Minsk to a small town. I didn’t dare to reveal my intentions to my husband - I persuaded him to arrange an excursion for us to the local ruined castle - I, they say, dream of touching history (I shouldn’t be so ironic - I really really love everything ancient, excursions and my country).

My husband agreed, we booked a place on the phone in a local hotel - and drove off. As I expected, my husband, who had been driving for several hours, got tired, and allowed me to walk around the town alone "just next to the hotel." To the ruins of the castle, we planned to leave tomorrow.

I went to the address given to me by my son's friend. The town was indeed so small that it could be walked from end to end in half an hour. With the help of local residents, I found the address I was looking for in 10-15 minutes. She entered the entrance. I was shaking. While still leaving the hotel, I took Novopassit.

It was already the third year since our children were in America. I figured out how much the child should be if the girl was really pregnant - about 5 years old. I also made plans to find out if there is a child - is he really our grandson. And with these thoughts she rang the doorbell on the second floor.

I heard a quick stomping outside the door, the lock clicked - and although the adult opened the door for me, I didn’t immediately look at him - my eyes filled with tears so quickly that I just didn’t have time to pull myself together - in front of me, next to the adult who opened me I stood by myself ... at 5 years old.

A terrible moment of realization of how I look with my tears - and I looked at an adult - a man of my age with a kind, intelligent face. All words flew out of my head at that moment. I forgot everything cooked, the color rushed to my face after the tears. And at that moment our “provincial” came out into the corridor.

And very simply, as if my arrival was a long-planned event, she said - “Hello, …… ………! Dad, meet me, this is ...... .. mom. Daughter - this is your grandmother. And the most wonderful child in the world, without breaking, without embarrassment, said: “Hi, grandma! Why didn't you come back for so long?"

To which I muttered something not worth remembering. The granddaughter took me to the room, her mother and grandfather gave me such a reception, which, really, I was unworthy.

And, having agreed on tomorrow's visit with my husband, I hurried back to the hotel. It is difficult to retell the conversation with my husband - I did not hide anything, including the scene in the "Central". In general, that evening I promised myself the rest of my life to try not to sin in anything.

Now I have a daughter and grandchildren

The husband, seeing his granddaughter, exclaimed in shock: “This is your copy!” (My husband and I have known each other since he was 8, and my 3 years old were neighbors on the site). And the granddaughter said: "But no - I'm not a grandmother yet."

It was an amazing evening - better than protecting a son, than even a wedding. We laughed, made plans and went to look at the castle after all - granddaughter's second (or rather, first) grandfather turned out to be a history teacher. How dear these memories are to me!

For 4 years now we have been living together - with my husband, daughter and granddaughter. Our apartment is large and privatized - so it was not difficult to register our own girls. The father of the eldest girl stayed in his hometown to teach at his native school, although my husband and I wanted to arrange it in Minsk so as not to deprive our families.

We all go to him in turn, most of all - my husband, they have become real friends. Granddaughter, our sun, is already 9 years old. Smart is incredible. Now I am very pleased to hear the news of the daughter-in-law's parents about their grandchildren. And I send photos of our beauty to Israel regularly.

And the second time we flew to America with her. Our daughter, the granddaughter's mother, just had the beginning of pregnancy, she was put into preservation - and her husband stayed with her. Yes, of course, she married, and not only for whom - we ourselves introduced him, he is a graduate student husband, a very worthy person.

My granddaughter did not like it in America either. She was glad to see the real dad, but she missed her mom very much. She flew away with joy. Our son could not see enough of her, now we are waiting - whether our Americans are going to become parents after all ... I am so happy!

I already have a granddaughter - a third-grader and a one-year-old grandson. Our girl, whom we once called a “provincial” is our real daughter (her mother died a year before her graduation). Therefore, her children are our real grandchildren.

Soon our daughter will defend herself - she will be a candidate of sciences. Incredible smart! The husband thinks that he will someday master the doctorate.

Here, look (and the woman takes out a photograph from an old-fashioned "purse") - really, what a noble face? And here is the granddaughter ... son ... daughter-in-law ... husband (returns to the first photo, presses it to his lips, hides everything back) my entire iconostasis, Lord forgive me.

The story is told on the train, at the station a woman (about 60 years old) was met by a handsome tall young man with a girl. The woman, seeing them from the window in the corridor, said to me with pride, “Son-in-law!”. The girl is really very similar to a woman, even with such a difference in age is noticeable.

Seeing her grandmother in the vestibule, the girl shouted in a ringing voice: “Dad! Grandmother! Granny! How we missed you! And me, and mom, and grandfather ... .. dad, did you miss me? (the young man laughs and nods) - and dad, and ... .. (apparently, the name of the brother) "

The curtain…

Dear readers! Did you like this story? Could you accept your son's girlfriend and her child into your family? We are waiting for your answers in the comments!